Football Cliches

The pod welcomes Gary Lineker for the latest edition of Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Match of the Day host and England legend chooses his six personal fascinations and irritations of football.Among Gary's selections are his growing curiosity about expected goals, the psychology of penalty shootouts, the death of strikers rounding goalkeepers, a not-so-radical solution for quick free kicks, overindulgent TV slow-motion replays and the futile duty of pre-match interviews with managers.Meanwhile, the Adjudication Panel bemoan the misuse of "high-flying" for teams who don't need it and ask Gary a very important question about a Match of the Day tradition.Get your Football Cliches merch here: https://www.100-percent.co.uk/collections/football-cliches Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: whether Arsenal won the north London derby "the hard way", when Sarcastic Pep becomes impossible to separate from Normal Pep, commentators answering their own rhetorical questions, teams "sealing" relegation, more footballspeak at the snooker, a footballer-sounding shampoo innovation and Harry Redknapp opening a local supermarket.Meanwhile, the panel analyse a listener's Missing Piece of the Jigsaw XI and enjoy some more vintage Andy Gray co-commentary.Get your Football Cliches merch here: https://www.100-percent.co.uk/collections/football-cliches Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The Football Clichés Quiz is back once again and this month the Clichés team welcome their latest podcast challengers in the form of the Totally Football Show's Michael Cox, Jay Harris and Sasha Goryunov.The questions include managers who just know their clubs, Monday Night Football hotbeds, Player of the Month merchants, some more A.I. foreign-language dubbing action, 'bit of both' punditry line-ups and, of course, the Happy Hunting Grounds round. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: some commentary highlights from the FA Cup semi-finals, a classic anti-VAR put-down, a surprise trumpet player on a George Michael album, football chat at the snooker once again, Guardian Football Weekly debating glancing headers and Thomas Muller ending the most tenuous footballing drought of all time.Meanwhile, the panel discuss what type of goal is best described as "a peach" and decide the maximum number of players involved in an X-on-Y counter-attack. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker field the listeners' April entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations.Among the selections are the hapless but unifying body language of a player who doesn't know where the ball is, a genuinely worrying peripheral astroturf hang-up, the downsides of teams from the same country being drawn together in Europe and the impact of the iPad on managerial decorum after their team has conceded a very specific type of goal. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: players forgetting it's a cup game in their post-match interview, notably young referees, Wayne Rooney's childhood Match of the Day dream, Barclays-era referees popping up in The Simpsons and Andy Gray answering his own questions.Meanwhile, the panel discuss teams "trying to score the perfect goal" and enjoy Matt Le Tissier being out-weirded for once. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The pod welcomes commentator Jon Champion for the latest edition of Mesut Haaland Dicks, as he chooses his six personal fascinations and irritations of football.Among Jon's selections are Ally McCoist's sheer enthusiasm for football (and life), the romance of the underdog, overseas fans' fascination with English football, the temptation of recency bias, the grilled shrimp at Minnesota United and the overcomplication of football terminology.Meanwhile, the Adjudication Panel grill their guest on the art of teasing your co-commentator and enjoy his recorded audio for Pro Evolution Soccer 2013. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: James Ward-Prowse making the podcast eat its words, some subversive penalty commentary, some harsh words for a 50-yard clearance upfield, some rare footballers called Pete and people talking like Richard Keys in unexpected places.Meanwhile, the panel bemoan some hasty Panenka-declaring and decide the derby most likely to inspire the words "in these parts". Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker on a midweek Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: a much-needed abbreviation for the business end of the EFL campaign, some autopilot content with the Brazilian Ronaldo, an audiobook voiceover artist guessing the tune of a football chant, a unique goalscoring verb, Richard Keys on his own Wikipedia page and why there aren't any footballers called "Pete".Meanwhile, the panel decide if a corner can be described as "[Player X] territory" and whether it's possible to score from a tight angle on the halfway line. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Nick Miller for the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: Jude Bellingham staying one step ahead of the England news cycle, a suitably literal analysis of the chant "Is this a library?", whether a very specific type of penalty decision is really in the spirit of the game, Gary Neville on Beyonce, Andy Gray's greatest hits, and Richard Keys’ career advice for Xabi Alonso.Meanwhile, the panel ponder how many passes constitute a "string" and whether a player has ever scored a goal with the "middle" kick of the game. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices