Find Your Voice, Change Your Life

Today, I interview Ann Hince whose story certainly has a unique beginning. She was adopted as a newborn into a family who had just had to give up a foster daughter, so in some ways she started her life by filling in another one's shoes. There was a lot of moving and traveling when Ann was a child, and somehow her birth mother kept track of her location all along. Ann experienced some traumatic experiences as a young child. She told her parents her room was on fire and they didn't believe her. So from day one her voice was quieted. Among many places they'd lived was Hong Kong, and while her family lived there she was sent away to England to attend her brother's boarding school-- a boys-only institution-- which would be yet another confusing and scary experience on a list of many that had suppressed her voice. Through the years her dad also tormented her. He made her record herself speaking on cassette, something to be mailed to the grandparents, but would also chime in, mocking and ridiculing her for how her voice sounded. He also repeated the same teasing that Ann said she was receiving from the boys at her school. So her fear grew and she continued to hide within herself, tired of the constant humiliation. When she reached 21, she left that life behind and headed for California, where she had a family and pursued a career in software engineering. She was confronted by some disagreement from some fellow coworkers and it absolutely tormented her. A few days later, she'd processed the incident and realized that she shouldn't have had such a strong reaction-- that there was unresolved trauma and she could do something about it. So she did. Ann went on an amazing journey and found emotional freedom. Today, she encourages others to allow themselves to fully experience what they're feeling and work through it, rather than suppressing it. She helps them to be present and acknowledge the moment so they can move past their fear and pain. ___________ When Ann was 19, she woke one morning to find her mother dead in her bathroom. Twenty years later the tears from that trauma were still just under the surface. Ann found a simple technique that helped her release these emotions - but she went further and can now put her awareness inside her body - and has changed the bone structure of her skull and grown ½ an inch at age 55. Ann has found that seeking out our truth, what we truly feel, and accepting those feelings, is the key to inner peace. Find Ann here: https://annhince.com/ https://www.facebook.com/AnnHinceWisdom https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCTc4hb7ZKvih1LlRHK0cUjg Book: A Pathway to Insight on Amazon___________I'm your podcast host, Dr. Doreen Downing, and I help people find their voice so they can overcome anxiety, be confident, and speak without fear. Get started now on your journey to your authentic voice by downloading my Free 7 Step Guide to Fearless Speaking: https://www.doreen7steps.com.  Support the showI’m Dr. Doreen Downing and I help people find their voice so they can speak without fear. Get the Free 7-Step Guide to Fearless Speaking https://www.doreen7steps.com​.

Today, I interview Paul Hood who describes his childhood household as "quiet, non-controversial, and easy". Maintaining privacy and avoiding conflict were the M.O. His father was a CPA and introduced him to a colleague who was both a CPA and a lawyer, and at age ten Paul decided that this was the combination he would strive for. He graduated with a master's in tax law and was mentored in estate planning, in which he landed a successful job at a great firm. At age 38, he was nationally nominated for an ACTEC fellowship-- something unheard of for someone so young-- and became a reputable speaker. Then, he stood his ground in a disagreement within a social organization for which he was treasurer. He lost the battle and was blacklisted in the community. Not long after, his wife of ten years decided she wanted a divorce. Paul loved his work, but he was experiencing burnout. He would later be diagnosed as bipolar. Then, after some deception by his clients regarding an estate matter, the tables turned and Paul's handling of the case was regarded as unethical, and he eventually received a suspension from the bar. His friends and colleagues abandoned him, he was struggling with his custody battle, and after much anxiety, he'd become addicted to Xanax. And finally, after a heartbreaking misunderstanding with his family, an altercation went terribly wrong. His world was crumbling and he attempted suicide. He realized that "suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem." He was determined to climb out of the empty hole his life had become. He has completed rehabilitation and worked to be reinstated. He encourages others never to stop believing in themselves, and that when we don't have anyone in our corner, we have to be our own strength. He believes his inner voice carried him through. __________________ A native of Louisiana (and a double LSU Tiger), Paul Hood obtained his undergraduate and law degrees from Louisiana State University and an LL.M. in taxation from Georgetown University Law Center before settling down to practice tax and estate planning law in the New Orleans area. Paul has taught at the University of New Orleans, Northeastern University, The University of Toledo College of Law, and Ohio Northern University Pettit College of Law. Paul has authored or co-authored nine books and over 500 professional articles on estate, charitable and tax planning, and business valuation. Paul’s ninth book, Yours, Mine & Ours: Estate Planning for People in Blended or StepFamilies, is now out. A “recovering tax lawyer” and frequent contributor to Leimberg Information Services since its inception, Paul is a highly sought-after speaker and consultant because of his innate ability to see through the complexity and explain difficult and even boring subjects in understandable and entertaining language with his insightful and biting sense of humor, and he minces no words in doing so. Along the way, Paul’s been a father, husband, uncle, Godfather, lawyer, trustee, member, director, president, partner, trust protector, director of planned giving, expert witness, agent, professor, judge, juror, respondent, and a defendant, and he uses his experience in these myriad roles to guide others. Paul is an author, speaker, and consultant on tax, estate, and charitable planning. He also is a Vice-President with Thompson & Associates, a charitable estate planning firm.___________________ Find Paul here: paul@paulhoodservices.com https://paulhoodservices.com/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/paul-hood-9b51a49/___________________ I'm your podcast host, Dr. DoreenSupport the showI’m Dr. Doreen Downing and I help people find their voice so they can speak without fear. Get the Free 7-Step Guide to Fearless Speaking https://www.doreen7steps.com​.

Today, I interview Lesley Evans who as the youngest of three children and the only girl, received plenty of attention as a child. Her voice didn't begin to fade until her teenage years. Her parents divorced and she focused on comforting her mother, and from there she naturally fell into a caretaker role, giving her friends advice and being the supporter for anyone who needed it. As a young adult, Lesley lived her life according to a checklist: get a degree, find a job, get married, buy a house, have children. She was busy all the time, getting things done and checking them off her list. But somewhere along the line, she lost herself. She was so preoccupied with accomplishing everything on the list, and with taking care of people and meeting their needs, that she completely forgot about herself. In this interview, Lesley also mentions her sudden realization that her voice was also silenced because of her work in the nursing/therapy field-- that often times nurses and therapists put in the most time and labor, yet the doctor is the only one who can "sign off" on things and have the final say. In a precious revelation, Lesley saw the need for change when she saw her own habits mirrored in her daughter. As she encouraged her daughter not to diminish herself for anyone, she sensed that a shift needed to be made. She worked to break the cycle of putting herself last so that she could set a better example for her children. Lesley did a deep spiritual dive, learning to understand her life and her energy better. She was able to use all the losses and changes along the way to transform herself and find her own healing. Today, she uses alternative therapies to help others achieve physical and emotional balance, form healthy habits, and rewire their thinking in a more positive way. __________________ Lesley is an International Best-Selling Author of DeFUNK YourSELF. She has developed a perfect blend of ​modern and magical ​therapies to empower the overwhelmed by teaching how to shed the guilt, find your passion, and live an inspired life. Lesley has thirty years of experience as a Registered Psychiatric Nurse Therapist. She is a Certified Soul C​are Practitioner and Reiki Master. She brings new purpose and passion for raising awareness, gaining new perspectives, and teaching others to Shine Their Light​. ​She believes, like The Rising Phoenix, that everyone can rise from the ashes of their old lives and build themselves stronger to shine their light into the world. Click the link to get Lesley's Tips to Fit Mindfulness Into Everyday Life: https://mailchi.mp/3d7acc782623/everydaymindfulness Find Lesley here: lesley@riseofthephoenix.org https://www.riseofthephoenix.org/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/lesley-evans-49a779203/ https://www.facebook.com/RiseUpwithRiseOfThePhoenix https://www.facebook.com/lesleytevans __________________I'm your podcast host, Dr. Doreen Downing, and I help people find their voice so they can overcome anxiety, be confident, and speak without fear. Get started now on your journey to your authentic voice by downloading my Free 7 Step Guide to Fearless Speaking: https://www.doreen7steps.com. Support the showI’m Dr. Doreen Downing and I help people find their voice so they can speak without fear. Get the Free 7-Step Guide to Fearless Speaking https://www.doreen7steps.com​.

Today, I interview Doug Brown who was raised by two very hardworking parents. He was encouraged to persevere and accomplish as much as he could, but that put a lot of emphasis on performance and left less time for self-reflection. There wasn't much room for slowing down to connect. He says that throughout his various experiences and occupations, he's never had a fear of the microphone. He never felt anxious about delivering a message and getting the job done. But truly letting himself be seen and revealing his vulnerable side was a completely foreign idea for him. Doug continued onto what would become a very long and successful career built around fortifying businesses and rescuing and repairing issues for business owners. He worked extremely hard-- so hard, in fact, that he wasn't taking care of himself. He was becoming more and more empty, and his own needs weren't being met. He fell into extreme burnout and finally knew he needed to make some urgent changes when he started experiencing panic attacks. After heeding advice of coaches and mentors to explore mindfulness, Doug became attuned to his own place in the world, putting thought into how he wanted his life to look and how he wanted to represent himself. He wanted to thrive, and he was ready to make the necessary changes. Now in his interactions with people, he truly values taking the time to really connect. He believes we accomplish more as humans when we share ourselves with others. That's what makes the most meaningful difference. __________________ Doug is an executive coach and consultant who helps high-performing CEOs, business owners, lawyers, and other professionals maximize their business growth and leadership success so they can have the freedom to live a fulfilled life. Doug's story of finding his voice is tied to his career and life journey from the child of small business owners through being a lawyer and into his own journey into the corporate world and becoming an entrepreneur, business builder, and fixer. And over the last 25 years, he's helped transform multiple seven and eight-figure businesses, from large corporations to family businesses, professional practices, not-for-profits, and professional associations. Find Doug here: doug@summit-success.com https://www.summit-success.com/lawyerhttps://summit-success.com/author/doug-brown/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/douglasbrown/ https://www.facebook.com/summitsuccessllc https://www.facebook.com/dougbrownspeaks___________________I'm your podcast host, Dr. Doreen Downing, and I help people find their voice so they can overcome anxiety, be confident, and speak without fear. Get started now on your journey to your authentic voice by downloading my Free 7 Step Guide to Fearless Speaking: https://www.doreen7steps.com.  Support the showI’m Dr. Doreen Downing and I help people find their voice so they can speak without fear. Get the Free 7-Step Guide to Fearless Speaking https://www.doreen7steps.com​.

Today, I interview Peleg Top who was bullied as a child growing up in Israel. He knew who he was, and he had things to say, but he felt that no one wanted to hear them.  As a gay young child he was teased and felt that he never fit in. Eventually he began to believe those lies and would later require some inner work to rediscover his love for himself. Throughout his teenage years, the bullying continued. And he hid more and more of his true self, eventually feeling as though life was a mindless act and he was just going through the motions. Peleg points out that as innocent children, we exist as pure love and joy. When he was finally able to do the inner work required to heal, the result was coming full circle back to himself-- back to that place of existing as love and joy. He's realized that it's okay to say what he wants,  to say and share what's in his heart with people, and that it's also okay if people didn't agree with what he has to say. And that is so empowering! Peleg naturally protects his creativity and uses his knowledge and spirituality to protect his true self-- the true self he fought so hard to reclaim. Today, he's a creative coach and spiritual director who studies and teaches about transformation, change, and building healthy habits. __________________ Peleg Top comes to us from Santa Fe, in the land of enchantment in New Mexico. He is the founder of the "Creative High Growth Method" a soul awakening process that helps people at a crossroads find their purpose and authentic voice. Peleg wears many creative hats. He is a trained spiritual director, an entrepreneur, an artist, a trained chef, a graphic designer, and a recovering overachiever Find Peleg here: hello@pelegtop.com https://www.pelegtop.com/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/pelegtop/ https://www.facebook.com/withpelegtop https://twitter.com/pelegtop __________________I'm your podcast host, Dr. Doreen Downing, and I help people find their voice so they can overcome anxiety, be confident, and speak without fear. Get started now on your journey to your authentic voice by downloading my Free 7 Step Guide to Fearless Speaking: https://www.doreen7steps.com. Support the showI’m Dr. Doreen Downing and I help people find their voice so they can speak without fear. Get the Free 7-Step Guide to Fearless Speaking https://www.doreen7steps.com​.

Today, I interview Ray Bourcier who was five when he experienced the beginnings of what would become a major conflict within his family. Aunts and uncles in disagreement with his own parents led to a complete falling out by the time he'd reached age eight. Ray was excluded from activities with his cousins based on the adults disliking each other, and so began the inner turmoil and lack of self-worth for such a little guy. What's more, a troubling mental health diagnosis for his mother led to no peace for Ray. The discord and resentment continued in the family, and Ray says he spent the next two decades basically "in survival mode". He didn't feel safe. He didn't feel like he fit in anywhere. And he didn't have a true sense of his own identity. He had no motivation in school, was bullied, and felt very left behind. He ended up giving up on college to care for his mother. Eventually, he decided to give life one more try. He re-enrolled in hopes of studying Environmental Science. Then, a shocking incident would change his life forever. A SWAT team burst into his apartment in full force and scared the life out of him. Officers left after realizing they'd hit the wrong apartment, but Ray was terrified and completely paralyzed by the whole event. He failed his exams and lost focus. But he later realized that he had the opportunity to view life with a different perspective. He challenged the odds and completed his degree. But it was time to reevaluate his struggling marriage and make a change before his child was to be born. He made a conscious choice to heal from his past and to prevent the same toxicity from impacting his child's life. He made it to the other side and now uses his company and his podcast to encourage other people (his heart is for parents & kids) to embrace change, have an open mind, build their strength, and never give up. __________________ From the age of five and for the next 20-plus years, Ray struggled through severe anxiety and depression before starting his journey of overcoming his struggles. Ray is now a father, author, podcaster, and mentor. His goal is to help transform the lives and impact the worlds of 11 million parents by helping them to break the cycle so it doesn't get passed on to their kids, their relationships, and their dreams. Captivate featured his podcast "From Surviving To Thriving" only six weeks after its launching. Find Ray here: http://empowerup.info/tribe empoweruptransform@gmail.com http://www.worldsbest.support/ https://www.facebook.com/empowerup.transformation https://www.linkedin.com/in/raymond-bourcier-44b9a31b2/ https://www.fromsurvivingtothrivingpodcast.com/ https://www.instagram.com/myempowerup/ https://twitter.com/EmpowerUp__________________ I'm your podcast host, Dr. Doreen Downing, and I help people find their voice so they can overcome anxiety, be confident, and speak without fear. Get started now on your journey to your authentic voice by downloading my Free 7 Step Guide to Fearless Speaking: https://www.doreen7steps.com.  Support the showI’m Dr. Doreen Downing and I help people find their voice so they can speak without fear. Get the Free 7-Step Guide to Fearless Speaking https://www.doreen7steps.com​.

Today, I interview Carl Ficks who grew up in a household where writing took precedence over speaking. His father held various positions where writing was a key role, and Carl learned to develop the habit of writing well and listening well. His parents communicated calmly and clearly without the need for shouting or excessive emphasis, and Carl learned to follow this model and attitude. His carriage and demeanor showed in his schooling also, where he believed that choosing the appropriate time to be silent was just as important as making the effort to be vocal. Now as an adult, Carl has made the art of listening a priority. He recalls that when he practiced law, he observed numerous instances where he believed listening was the answer-- that people simply wanted and needed to be heard. The depth of his communication is seen in his writing. Calling himself "the quiet lawyer," Carl says that rather than show physical or verbal boldness in his field, he chose to let his writing and his work do the talking. After many years of faithful service, Carl pivoted from law toward something that inspired him in a fresh new way: fitness. He founded a company called No Surrender, where he helps busy business professionals to thrive by harnessing the benefits of fitness. He thrives by serving others, helping them to improve their physical and mental health in every way, which in turn brings them success and happiness in life and in their pursuits. __________________ Carl Ficks helps busy professionals get back in the fitness game so they can thrive. His "Ficks System" is a proven road map for endurance athletes and weekend warriors alike. His bi-weekly newspaper column and LinkedIn posts, both titled "The Friday Ficks," provide strategies, tools, and inspiration to stay resourceful and resilient regardless of the circumstances. Carl was also a trial lawyer for 30+ years before starting No Surrender, LLC Click here to download Carl's free guide, 10 Steps for Getting Back in the Game: www.carlficks.com/free Find Carl here: https://www.carlficks.com https://www.linkedin.com/in/carlrficksjr/ https://www.facebook.com/carl.ficks.1 https://www.instagram.com/carlficks/ __________________I'm your podcast host, Dr. Doreen Downing, and I help people find their voice so they can overcome anxiety, be confident, and speak without fear. Get started now on your journey to your authentic voice by downloading my Free 7 Step Guide to Fearless Speaking: https://www.doreen7steps.com.    Support the showI’m Dr. Doreen Downing and I help people find their voice so they can speak without fear. Get the Free 7-Step Guide to Fearless Speaking https://www.doreen7steps.com​.

Today, I interview Cedric Crumbley who grew up in Georgia. When he was an infant, his father passed away. So unfortunately, he didn't get to know his Dad. However, his father's siblings saw so much of his father in Cedric that they truly treasured him. He was certainly given a lot of attention and had great connection with the adults in his family. He was even teased a little in school because he had such an adult-like way of speaking. He naturally had a positive outlook (which was rare among his peers) and although he looked to God to be his father figure, he also later gained a stepfather who fully believed in him and encouraged him to shoot for the moon. His new dad taught him that he could do anything and that if there was any trouble, it was because he wasn't being true to himself. In high school, Cedric didn't like being the tall skinny kid, so he read a bodybuilding book and put on quite a bit of muscle over the summer, coming back to school feeling more confident and proud of himself. Cedric had a vision for success. He wanted to find ways to make lots of money, and fast. But his mother encouraged him to slow down and focus on learning and developing himself. He fought that idea, ended up in a little trouble, and a judge recommended the military because he felt that learning that level of respect would do a great deal to help him develop his character. He says the Army changed his heart. While he didn't want to go, he did learn about hard work, being faithful, and the meaning of respect. And so, it turns out that Cedric's talent is learning. He says that whether you find a book or a course, whatever it is you want to learn or become or do, it can be done. He encourages us to find the thing about us that is most special and to use that gift to thrive. __________________Cedric Crumbley went into the army when he was still a teenager. After 20 years in uniform, he hung up his boots and started a new chapter in life. He says one of his biggest thrills was to retire at a young age, and he's taken what he's learned to become the author of Proven Sales and Recruiting Methods. Find Cedric here: cedcrumbley@gmail.com  https://cedriccrumbley.com/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/cedcrumbley/ https://twitter.com/CedricCrumbley ___________________I'm your podcast host, Dr. Doreen Downing, and I help people find their voice so they can overcome anxiety, be confident, and speak without fear. Get started now on your journey to your authentic voice by downloading my Free 7 Step Guide to Fearless Speaking: https://www.doreen7steps.com.   Support the showI’m Dr. Doreen Downing and I help people find their voice so they can speak without fear. Get the Free 7-Step Guide to Fearless Speaking https://www.doreen7steps.com​.

Today, I interview Michael Rost, whose young life included the emphasis on "comparative suffering." He tells us that to his father complaining was unwelcomed and was overshadowed by the reminder that others had it far worse.  So his young mind learned not to open up to others. Well, when you don't speak much, you're able to become quite the listener. Michael took it to another level, becoming fascinated with tones and vibrations coming through in the voices of the adults around him, allowing the subtleties to help him to discern what was really going on-- the things no one was saying out loud. Later in his doctoral studies of phonology, Michael learned that when we hear, our brain processes emotional response before it processes the actual meaning of the words. He continued to finish his degree and became heavily involved in the academic world, thriving in a world of intellectual talent. But eventually, his mind and body had a disconnect, and the psychological pressure to perform manifested in physical exhaustion, dizziness, and burnout. Although it went against his family's nature, he eventually sought therapy to get to the root of his dizziness and ended up realizing he'd felt pressure from all sides pulling him in different directions and it was causing internal conflict. Now that he's learned to listen to his own voice and focus on his own goals, Michael has learned to slow down and balance his thoughts so that he can teach and write with intention. __________________ Michael Rost has had a lifelong interest in communication theory and has had an illustrious career in academia, specializing in psycholinguistics; in language teacher education, focusing on speaking and listening development; and in instructional design, concentrating on listening-based language courses. Though he has numerous publications in linguistics, Michael recently published his first novel, a memoir called The Journey Home — which is published under the pen name Gabriel Bron. Michael is a great believer in the value of “pivotal experiences” in one’s life and career – and he considers his first encounter with Speaking Circles, some 20 years ago, in which he met me (Doreen) and Lee Glickstein, to be a pivotal experience — which transformed his view of public speaking and his view of writing. He is “forever grateful” for this encounter — and for the doors it opened to more personal and more satisfying self-expression. Find Michael here: michael.rost@latcomm.com https://www.linkedin.com/in/michael-rost-b67475/_____________________I'm your podcast host, Dr. Doreen Downing, and I help people find their voice so they can overcome anxiety, be confident, and speak without fear. Get started now on your journey to your authentic voice by downloading my Free 7 Step Guide to Fearless Speaking: https://www.doreen7steps.com.  Support the showI’m Dr. Doreen Downing and I help people find their voice so they can speak without fear. Get the Free 7-Step Guide to Fearless Speaking https://www.doreen7steps.com​.

Today, I interview Donna Tashjian who suffered loss and abuse at an early age.  She was forced to grow up fast and put aside what happened, focusing on adulthood without a true sense of her own identity. She hadn't been able to deal with her trauma, so her confidence was deeply hurt and she was very afraid of using her voice and making true connections with people. She struggled with the child voice inside her vs. the adult voice, knowing right and wrong but being made to feel like speaking up about it wasn't her place. So she stayed busy to block out those feelings. She eventually developed an appreciation for stillness, learning the importance of embracing her inner intuition, letting it out, and learning more about her true self every day. She came to develop a relationship with God and credits a church group for helping her find the courage to dig deep within herself to process and deal with her past. Now she helps others to turn the heavy painful parts of their past into empowering tools they can harness today in a healthy way, striving for productivity, success, and joy. __________________ Donna is the founder of Vibrant Living International a non-profit organization. She is also a Life Mastery Coach, an ordained minister, podcaster, and author. She helps bring accelerated transformation to people across the world. Her passion is to help you reach your full potential. She specializes in helping you turn your baggage into luggage so you can live the life of your dreams using and developing your spiritual intelligence. Donna has been speaking and coaching for over 25 years. She has developed powerful programs and workshops to help you through life's transitions and pain to achieve your goals or dreams. She also produces a podcast called “You Were Designed for Greatness” and has written 4 books. Her clients say she has a knack for turning fear into excitement and exposing lies so the truth can shine through. Find Donna here: https://www.ivibrantliving.com/ (Free book available on the homepage!) https://www.ivibrantliving.com/speaker-bio/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/donnatashjian/ https://www.facebook.com/drtashjian/ https://www.instagram.com/drtashjian/ https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXMFNossw9VN2QwDtVitzKg https://twitter.com/DonnaTashjian__________________I'm your podcast host, Dr. Doreen Downing, and I help people find their voice so they can overcome anxiety, be confident, and speak without fear. Get started now on your journey to your authentic voice by downloading my Free 7 Step Guide to Fearless Speaking: https://www.doreen7steps.com.  Support the showI’m Dr. Doreen Downing and I help people find their voice so they can speak without fear. Get the Free 7-Step Guide to Fearless Speaking https://www.doreen7steps.com​.