Dear Hank & John

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May 27, 2019 • 43min

191: The Engagement Duck

What is the dress code if there is no dress code? Where can I be anxious at work? What should I do with 72 tall vases? How can I avoid having to do dishes? How can I grow my own vegetables if the Sun is in the wrong place? How do I sort out my priorities? How do I tell my girlfriend's mother we aren't ready for a duck? Is there a polite way to ask someone to eat quietly? How and where should I conceal the dream rock? John and Hank have dubious advice! If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohnSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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May 20, 2019 • 48min

190: The Top Three Best Things About Sneezing Underwater

How do I get people to remember who I am? What do I do about the Red Bull I spilled in a kid's backpack? How do I deal with my girlfriend's unaccepting parents? Does cold water boil faster than hot water? Which way should a staple face? Is it possible to sneeze underwater? What is the correct way to eat the bottom of a popsicle? How do I get out of being grounded? Can I bring my boyfriend to a thing even though it says "spouses only"? John and Hank are here to help! If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohnSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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May 13, 2019 • 49min

189: Weird Statistics

Do a lot of people swerve? What constitutes black coffee? How do I make mac and cheese if I don't have milk? What is the rage/luck relationship when it comes to pennies? How do I find out my therapist's name? Should I give books to people who don't like to read? How should I deal with family drama? How do I get my charger back? Is it time to rip off the Band-Aid? John and Hank have (dubious) advice! If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohnSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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May 6, 2019 • 45min

188: The Imperial Bridal March

What is the proper thing to do with abandoned table beer? What's the best way to spend time on trains? How do I move on when my favorite show ends? How do I sleep in without waking up with a backache? Should I have played "The Imperial March" at a wedding? Are you allowed to use the soap in another person's shower? Why do some carrots taste earthier than others? Why isn't there a Neptune Day? What should I do about Gavin's grass ideas? John and Hank have dubious advice! If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohnSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Apr 29, 2019 • 41min

187: The Uncle Mike Way of Life

How do I fairly distribute my hugs? Could black holes suck up the Earth? How do I change the way I walk? How can I support my stressed-out dad? What's the best way to receive negative performance reviews? What do I do if I vomit at work? Why don't ants die when they fall from heights? Who should play me in the movie of my life? John and Hank have (dubious) answers! The poem John mentions at the beginning of the episode is "The Palace" by Kaveh Akbar, found here. If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohnSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Apr 22, 2019 • 43min

186: The Morlon Wiley Way In

How do you open an envelope? How do companies turn attention into money? What's the deal with the itsy bitsy spider? And more! Get your signed desk sword!!! https://store.dftba.com/products/john-green-signed-desk-swords If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohnSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Apr 15, 2019 • 53min

185: Time-Traveling Battle Axes

Who owns the bones? Why are American coins so confusing? Would dragon eggs have scales? And more! Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohnSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Apr 8, 2019 • 52min

184: Lady with the Time Piece (w/ Helen Zaltzman!)

How do you deal with saying something wrong publicly? How far does a squirrel's social sphere extend? Can I ask my friend questions about her surgery? And more! Thanks to Helen Zaltzman for being a temporary Green brother this week! Find more of Helen's work at helenzaltzman.com. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohnSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Apr 1, 2019 • 45min

183: John's Subway Safety Procedures

How do you stay focused on one project for a long time? Should I tell this stranger to examine their zipper? Are there other kinds of ketchup? And more! Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohnSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Mar 25, 2019 • 46min

182: It’s All Hermeneutics to Me

Are our voices actually slightly deeper? What's going on with paperclips? How do I keep out the chickens? And more! Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohnSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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