FRIED. The Burnout Podcast

SPONSORS https://cuely.ai/FRIED https://bearaby.com Zenica Chatman is a life coach with a professional background in journalism and communications. While working as a communication strategist in what she initially excitedly thought of as her dream job, Zenica became the victim of workplace bullying by her manager. She felt like she was really crushing it at work, and yet her manager found ways to make even her strengths seem like a bad thing. She was continually put down and told that she was the weakest team member regardless of her attempts to make improvements. Looking back at her performance evaluations and skills assessments, Zenica soon realized that there was no factual basis for any of the bullying she received about her job performance. After doing some research, Zenica learned that 30% of American workers report being the victim of workplace bullying.    “The new job did not heal me from the trauma that I experienced in the old job. That same person who didn't have any confidence, who was taking an hour to send simple emails, she went right on into that next job. And so there was a lot of inner work that I had to do in order to get back to the person that's talking to you today,” shares Zenica Chatman, life coach. If you are being bullied at work, you are at a higher risk of burnout. Between working harder to try to stay ahead of the criticism, stress over being talked down to, and the fear surrounding the possibility of needing to change jobs, there are a lot of factors that tend to pile up and cause burnout. Workplace bullying destroys confidence and often does not have a satisfying resolution from the company. It is important to learn how to move forward and heal from workplace bullying in order to succeed at your next job.    Workplace bullying is unfortunately a common experience, even with remote workers. Bullies often convince you to believe lies about yourself, so it is important to stay clear on the facts. Tune into today’s episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Zenica Chatman about how to recover from workplace bullying, so that it does not lead to burnout.    Quotes · “I was in an environment where even my strengths now are being used against me.” (8:07-8:11 | Zenica) · “That was the summer that George Floyd was murdered. And so it sparked this whole conversation in the workplace about diversity, equity, and inclusion. And I was in all of these different social media groups and on all these different chats, and I was hearing the stories of other women of color, mostly black women, who were having identical situations to me. And that was very scary to me, that these women that I didn't know in different states in different industries, we're all describing exactly the same scenario. And that just prompted me to say, is this a thing? Is workplace bullying a thing? Is that real, did I make that up? And come to find out, no, I didn't make it up. Actually, 30% of American workers report being bullied.” (8:42-9:32 | Zenica)  · “I think particularly when you're a woman in the workplace, and when you're a person of color, you know when you're being mistreated, but we all will start to lie to ourselves because we don't want to be that person. We don't want to be that person of color that says, ‘I think I'm being discriminated against,’ for whatever reason.” (14:39-14:56 | Zenica) · “The new job did not heal me from the trauma that I experienced in the old job. That same person who didn't have any confidence, who was taking an hour to send simple emails, she went right on into that next job. And so there was a lot of inner work that I had to do in order to get back to the person that's talking to you today.” (24:05-24:29 | Zenica)  · “Once I saw on that StrengthsFinder that what they said was not true in black and white. They said I wasn't a good communicator, but my actual assessment says that I was. Went back through old assessments, communication was always at the top and never, ever, ever not been a great communicator. And I started to say, what other lies did they try to put in your spirit that are not true? And so I started to peel back all the lies and I got very clear about what was true.” (29:49-30:18 | Zenica) · “Those environments have a way of making you believe things about yourself that are not true. So what's the lie that your environment has tried to put on you that is absolutely not true? And then replace it with the actual truth.” (30:53-31:07 | Zenica) · “Usually, HR is not going to help you. So you have to learn how to validate the experience for yourself so that you can move forward without resolution from the company.” (31:56-32:09 | Zenica) · “Why am I going to kill myself for a job that if I die tomorrow, they won't even trouble themselves to call my mother and send her a card? Because now I have clarity on what is important to me, and I don't feel like I'm sacrificing anything when I set boundaries for myself.” (56:10-56:37 | Zenica)   Links   https://cuely.ai/FRIED   https://bearaby.com   Connect with Zenica Chatman: Website: https://www.zenicachatman.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/z_chatman/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thenapministry/?hl=en XOXO, C   If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

It would be incredible if every time you were burned out, you could stop working and run off to rest in a magical Cinderella fantasyland where talking mice take care of all your problems. Unfortunately, that’s not the case for most of us. It is not always possible to stop working when you are burned out, and actually by staying, you may be doing yourself a favor in the long run. If you take a break from the toxic environment that was causing your burnout and then try to go back when you are feeling better, it is likely you will end up burned out all over again. This is because regardless of how well rested you may feel, you did not take the time to do the work required to change the behavior that caused you to become burned out originally. In today’s #straightfromcait episode, Cait explains how to recover from burnout while still working and why it may actually be a good idea to continue working while healing from burnout in certain cases. If you are burned out and unable to leave your job even temporarily, there are still ways to work on burnout recovery. Determine which internal and external factors apply to you and start making small shifts in your life based on those results. This way you are making small, manageable changes and not taking too much away from your energy that it leaves you depleted at work. By making the necessary behavioral shifts while still in your work environment, you may have a more smooth transition into burnout recovery than if you had taken a break or left your job. Quotes · “If you removed yourself from a situation that was requiring you to act in certain ways, and you didn't have to practice acting in better ways and shifting your behavior to protect yourself better, then when you go back into that environment you might not be prepared even if you're rested.” (4:58-5:16 | Cait) · “If you can't take time off work, you might really be doing yourself a favor by staying and working through some sh*t on the fly.” (8:15-8:22 | Cait)  · “The trick here, once again, is to do the easiest thing first. Allow it to have impact, and then move to the next easiest thing on the list. If you fill out your list, and you're not sure how to tackle any of your items, choose one of them and ask the Facebook group for ways to shift that behavior.” (15:12-15:30 | Cait) · “Asking for help and asking for other people's perspectives is one of the main ways we build resilience. So don't go this alone. If you're not sure what the answer is for you, let's do it together.” (15:36-15:49 | Cait) · “You cannot long term stay in a toxic environment and heal fully from burnout. Your physical and mental health will continue to deteriorate…Your best bet is to do everything within your power within the situation and then use whatever energy you create by making those changes to formulate a graceful exit strategy.” (17:00-17:33 | Cait) · “You're not going to find motivation when you're burned out just by looking for it. You're going to create energy by caring for yourself differently and by shifting the way you interact with your environment.” (19:40-19:52 | Cait)   SPONSORS https://cuely.ai/FRIED https://womensmeditationnetwork.com/ https://bearaby.com   XOXO, C   If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

SPONSORS https://cuely.ai/FRIED https://bearaby.com Becca Powers is an award winning fortune 500 high tech sales executive, founder and CEO of Powers Peak Potential, a best selling author and a speaker. With over 20 years of high level sales experience, she spent most of her life being an overachiever and unwittingly drove herself into major burnout. Becca’s burnout came after a particularly challenging sequence of 12 hour work days in a job where she was majorly overextending herself and unable to spend any time being there for her family. In hindsight, she recognizes that there were signs from her body mere months into the position telling her that it was not the right fit, but she dismissed those signs at the time. It took falling apart on the floor of her bathroom in a complete nervous breakdown after feeling like she was letting her children down for Becca to realize that change was overdue.    “Burnout ignites in feeling ‘undered’ and whether that's undervalued, underpaid, under-resourced, under-recognized, under-appreciated. I mean, you can put the under attached to it but it triggers our worth or it triggers deeper feelings of being unseen, unheard and feeling like we don't matter. And when that happens, we ‘over’,” shares Becca Powers. Becca grew up with hippie parents who were very involved in their band and party scene. She learned as a child that in order to gain her parent’s love and attention she needed to overachieve. This feeling unknowingly followed Becca into adulthood and caused her to overcommit at work which ultimately led to her feeling undervalued. The pattern of going over and above and then feeling the ‘unders’ is one that is very intrinsic to the burnout experience. The ‘overs’ and ‘unders’ can put you into a feedback loop that is difficult to extract yourself from.    When you find yourself feeling underappreciated, undervalued, or under-resourced, it is a sign that you need to implement healthy boundaries and take control back over your own energy. You do not have to overextend yourself constantly in order to have worth and it is okay to say no or ask for help. Tune into today’s episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Becca Powers about how the ‘unders’ lead to the ‘overs’ and what you can do to pull yourself out of that loop.  Quotes · “So many of us have the full plate and we don't really get to talk about it and we kind of be like, ‘Oh I'm okay’. Well, are you really? You got a full plate, it's okay not to be okay.” (4:53-5:03 | Becca) · “When I was broken on the bathroom floor, all of a sudden, I remembered that I was the CEO of my life… I remember thinking, ‘If I'm the CEO of my life, then I'm a lot more powerful in this situation than I thought’.” (7:45-8:09 | Becca) · “Is what I'm doing serving me or is it sabotaging me?” (9:54-9:56 | Becca) · “Burnout ignites in feeling undered and whether that's undervalued, underpaid, under resourced, under recognized under appreciated, I mean, you can put the under attached to it but it triggers our worth or it triggers deeper feelings of being unseen, unheard and feeling like we don't matter. And when that happens, we over.” (11:59-12:24 | Becca) · “For me to get the attention, love, and acceptance I wanted from my parents I had to overachieve. I had to do. I had to over a lot.” (15:19-15:29 | Becca) · “Burnout is a very external response to us seeking externally what we weren't able to either give ourselves internally or like you said to our childhood just didn't get. It's not programmed in us to know that we have the innate wisdom within to give ourselves everything that we need.” (20:16-20:37 | Becca) · “In hindsight, what I have learned is when I was surviving, my kids were surviving. And when I'm thriving, my kids are thriving.” (26:51-27:00 | Becca) · “By building boundaries, you can create space for other people's growth and success.” (34:25-34:31 | Cait) · “What is your role? And are the actions and responsibilities that you're doing supporting the role that you have and want in your life, whether it's at work or at home?” (38:19-38:31 | Becca)   Links   https://cuely.ai/FRIED https://womensmeditationnetwork.com/   Connect with Becca Powers https://www.instagram.com/beccapowers1313/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/beccapowers1313/ https://www.beccapowers.com/burnout XOXO, C   If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Quiet quitting is not a new concept, but has gotten a lot of attention recently after the pandemic shook up the job market. The basic idea of quiet quitting is being disengaged from your work and this can often be mistaken for burnout. The key difference is that quiet quitting is intentional, whereas if you are burned out, you are likely to be disengaged as a result rather than as a choice. In today’s #straightfromcait episode, Cait explains quiet quitting vs. loud quitting, and the way resentment fuels disengagement.    Resentment is the primary emotion that leads to quiet quitting. This could be resentment for how you are being treated at work, resentment for being forced back into the office, resentment over your job role not being clear enough, or any multitude of reasons. If you are disengaged because you really don’t feel like your current position is a good fit for you, it is best to loud quit rather than sticking around and growing more resentful. That resentment builds over time and can lead to burnout, so planning an exit strategy and leaving your job may be the best option for your long term mental health. If you need help working to transform your resentment and make a plan for moving forward, Cait has created the Resentment Journal specifically for that purpose which can be accessed from her website.   Sometimes your job or the company you are working for won’t be the best fit for you. It does not always mean that there is something inherently wrong with you or the company. In those situations, it is best to form an exit strategy and leave to find a better fit. In other cases, your company may be willing to work with you to help better meet your needs, and it may come down to having a conversation with your boss or an HR professional to see what can be done. Regardless of the reason causing you to disengage, it is always best to loud quit versus quiet quitting, because in the long run quiet quitting will increase resentment and damage your mental health.   Quotes • “There are going to be situations where you and a company are just not a good fit. And it doesn't mean that either of you are bad or good.” (4:31-4:41 | Cait) • “If something's not a fit, just loud quit, get out of here, go do something else.” (5:38-5:43 | Cait) • “When you are burnt out and you find yourself in a situation similar to quiet quitting, I want you to understand that that's likely a coping mechanism and not necessarily part of an actual decision that you're making.” (6:34-6:46 | Cait) • “Quiet quitting as a short term coping mechanism, acceptable. Quiet quitting as a long term plan for life will destroy your mental health.” (10:15-10:25 | Cait)  • “If we start building enough courage to speak up about our needs, we will find quite often that people are willing to meet them.” (11:47-12:00 | Cait) “The emotion that sits behind quiet quitting is resentment. And the answer to that is creating space for and transforming that resentment.” (13:51-14:07 | Cait)   Links    https://www.caitdonovan.com/resentment-journal   https://cuely.ai/FRIED https://womensmeditationnetwork.com/ XOXO, C   If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Newton Cheng is the Director of Health and Performance at Google, a world champion powerlifter, and a father. Throughout his 14 year career at Google, he overworked himself due to people-pleasing tendencies and began getting misaligned from his priorities and values, leading Newton to take a mental health leave in January of 2022. In February of 2021 his symptoms of burnout, anxiety, and depression got to the point where he started to realize just how significant the toll on his mental health was. He found himself struggling to get out of bed and felt a lot of shame for how he was failing to show up the way he wanted to as a husband and father. However, it still took awhile for him to decide to go on leave, because it felt like giving up. When Newton returned to Google after his mental health leave, he decided to share his story and be very upfront about his experiences to help others who may be suffering alone.    “I was raised in a culture where we talked a lot about mental toughness and this felt like the opposite of that. But what I knew was I was not showing up the husband and father that I wanted to be, so something had to change,” shares Newton Cheng. When Newton started talking about his leave at work, he was a little surprised by how many of his co-workers chose to refer to it as a sabbatical. Mental health is still so stigmatized in today’s society that people can feel uncomfortable even just saying the words out loud. However, this does a disservice to everyone who is suffering in silence and who just needs someone to listen and understand what they are going through. Newton had gotten to the point where he was unable to get out of bed and dreading going to work, even though he loved his job and felt his work was important to him. He was not able to be the father he wanted to be or the husband he wanted to be, and the shame ate away at him. As he began to share his mental health struggles more, Newton found that many of his co-workers of all levels across the organization were suffering from similar symptoms of burnout and depression. Many people who burn out in these situations choose to quit their job completely, but Newton’s problem was not with the job, but rather with his approach and how he chose to structure his boundaries or lack of boundaries. Once he stepped back and reorganized his life to align better with his values and put boundaries in place that allowed him to spend more time with his family, Newton was able to break through his burnout and stay on at Google.    Burning out at work does not necessarily mean you have to change your job. Sometimes all you need is to take a step away and restructure how you are approaching your work so that it can align better with the lifestyle you want. Tune into today’s episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Newton Cheng about experiencing burnout in a corporate setting and how to move forward while keeping your job.    Quotes · “February 2021 was the first time I physically couldn't get out of bed. And I had read about this in terms of others experiences with mental health and depression, but I had never actually felt it. And it wasn't so much like a physical paralysis, it was overwhelming dread. So from there, I started seeing the employee assistance provider and he told me I was exhibiting early signs of burnout.” (7:18-7:42 | Newton) · “I was raised in a culture where we talked a lot about mental toughness, and this felt like the opposite of that. But what I knew was I was not showing up the husband and father that I wanted to be, so something had to change.” (10:13-10:30 | Newton) · “When I told people I was going on leave, people started calling it my sabbatical. And I kept reframing. I'm like, my ‘mental health leave’. And that was very interesting. I’m like, I think you're probably doing that out of respect, because you don't know my boundary there and I very much appreciate that, but I don't think that's helping anyone. It's not a sabbatical and people know it's not sabbatical. But if we call it a sabbatical, we're just reinforcing that we have to hide things.” (28:26-28:56 | Newton) · “If we don't name what's actually going on, we can't actually address it.” (29:18-29:21 | Newton) · “As I have shared my story, the people who have come to me privately to say, ‘I'm suffering too’, they are people like me. They are people junior to me in organizations, they're my peers, they are above me. They're all around us.” (55:22-55:40 | Newton)  · “If you are suffering and you're in a situation similar to me, you are not alone.” (55:49-55:53 | Newton) · “To leaders who are in a position like mine, change doesn't happen, transformation doesn't happen without true leadership. True leadership requires those of us with the privilege to take some risks, to try some things, maybe to take some things and fail. But we got to do it and we got to share what we learn. And that's how we're going to move forward.” (56:06-56:25 | Newton)   Links   https://cuely.ai/FRIED https://womensmeditationnetwork.com/   Connect with Newton Cheng: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/newtoncheng/?hl=en LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/newtoncheng/   https://caitdonovan.com/resentment-journal https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/jim-young-ceo-dad-burnout-emotional-gold-digging-and-why-relationships-matter   Resource Newton Mentions: Byron Katie: https://thework.com/ XOXO, C   If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

“Just keep going, it will change.” This is Elizabeth Collins’s burnout story, simplified into six words. The Cait-proclaimed Burnout Witch, Elizabeth now specializes in helping others recover from burnout. However, she was only able to truly thrive in this role after confronting her own feelings of not-enough-ness and developing the boundaries and coping skills she needed to regain a sense of balance in both body and brain.    Elizabeth is the owner and director of The East West Company, an integrative wellness practice specializing in burnout recovery coaching, functional medicine, acupuncture and more. Elizabeth explains that functional medicine is a crossover between biomedicine and Eastern medicine; it uses a wide range of testing to identify and address the root cause of a presenting issue. Because the incredible breadth of functional medicine testing can seem overwhelming to someone who is burnt out, Elizabeth suggests starting simple with a blood panel and a stool test. This approach helps individuals correct any initial imbalances, which sets them on a more manageable path towards burnout recovery.   Tune into this week’s episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast to hear more about the intersections between functional medicine and burnout. Learn about the ins and outs of leaky gut, why Elizabeth uses tarot cards to broaden her clients’ perspectives, and why feelings of gratitude and frustration can and should co-exist.   Quotes “I had ‘Big T’ trauma, so that very much set me up for a lifetime of perfectionism, a lifetime of not really understanding that I am worthy of love simply because I exist.” (04:00-04:10) “My burnout story was: ‘just keep going, it will change.’” (07:26-07:32)  “That happens to people who are chronic people pleasers, who are prone to burnout….It’s very easy for you to set aside what you like because you’re more concerned about what needs to happen now, and it’s like, but what you like is what needs to happen now!” (10:49-11:05) “[Functional medicine] is kind of like if biomedicine and Eastern medicine had a baby.” (15:14-15:17) “When we’re in burnout, it’s very difficult to see anything other  than what we’re focusing on, which is usually panic, stress and anxiety. And the benefit when I started reading my own tarot cards again was...oh, this card popped up and it means this. How does that relate to my current situation? What is it about this card that can give me the opportunity to stop focusing on the minutia and look at the bigger picture?” (31:28-31:55)  “Being able to address different aspects of your personality and speak to them directly like they’re individuals gives a sense of agency to the experience, and it really gives people the opportunity to fully integrate those personalities.” (36:28-36:42) “We are complicated enough individuals that we can feel very bad about something that we’re going through and still be very grateful for the good things that it gives us or the other good things in our life….They’re not mutually exclusive, and the idea that we have to inhabit one thing at any given time is unsustainable and unfair and will absolutely perpetuate burnout.” (38:00-38:28) “If you have symptoms or you are living a life that is in your experience suboptimal, but in the greater perspective not catastrophic....you are not crazy, and there is help.” (49:10-49:35)   Links https://insighttimer.com/  www.theeastwestco.com  www.instagram.com/theeastwestco  www.instagram.com/thevintagemystic    XOXO, C   If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait

Are you always trying to meet other people’s expectations, even when those expectations may not be completely clear? Unclear expectations for a role, whether that be in relation to a job or a relationship, can reduce feelings of psychological safety and increase the potential for burnout. In today’s #straightfromcait episode, Cait explains the research behind why external expectations and role ambiguity play a role in burnout and how to ask for clarity when it is lacking.    When you are having to guess at someone’s expectations, you will end up feeling on edge and pushing yourself harder and harder trying to reach that unspecified goal. Research shows that role ambiguity, or a lack of clarity in your job role, can come into play not only at work, but also within relationships at home and with friends. When you are able to predict how another person will react and set up expectations for yourself relative to that predicted outcome, your feelings of safety will increase and your risk of burnout will decrease. By simply having a conversation that focuses on clarifying and setting expectations, you can improve overall communication and increase your own internal feelings of safety.   It is exhausting trying to meet expectations all the time, especially if the expectations you are trying to meet are unclear or simply a guess on your part. In order to gain clarity, improve your relationships, and reduce overall stress, it is important to communicate effectively. Tune into this week’s #straightfromcait episode for a conversation about how to determine other’s actual expectations. Learn why assuming other’s expectations can lead to burnout and how to ask for clarity.  RESEARCH: Maslach et. al. (2001). Job burnout. Annu Rev Psychol. 52. 397-422.  Quotes · “If you are feeling unclear about someone's expectations, and you are guessing at them, and you never quite get feedback on whether or not you're hitting the target, you're always going to feel on edge. And you're always going to push for doing things a little bit harder, a little bit more intense, to a better degree, to a higher degree. It'll never stop because you don't know when you've met the expectation.” (3:54-4:20 | Cait) · “Burnout recovery happens when we increase our feelings of safety internally and externally.” (5:41-5:46 | Cait)  · “You are more likely to experience burnout while also experiencing role ambiguity, a lack of clarity in your job role.” (7:06-7:14 | Cait) · “Sharing with someone what your thinking is behind the situation gives them a better idea of how you're looking at it and what's happening in your world, so that they can respond appropriately.” (10:33-10:44 | Cait)   Links    https://caitdonovan.com https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com https://facebook.com/groups/friedtheburnoutpodcast XOXO, C   If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Farnoosh Torabi shares her financial journey and how she left NYC to reduce stress. She emphasizes the importance of financial security before starting a business. There are various ways to earn money outside of a traditional job. Taking care of your finances puts you in control of your life.

There are many risk factors for burnout. The good news is that each risk factor is multidirectional and by working on any one of them, you are likely to positively change others. It can feel overwhelming to confront all of the risk factors for burnout, so in today’s #straightfromcait episode, Cait breaks them all down into six overarching categories. These categories are workplace, family, self, culture, environment, and health.    Here in the United States there is an extreme amount of pressure and importance placed on hard work and individuality. The issue with these being the major cultural values is that overworking can and does quite literally cause death through having an overall negative impact on long-term health. In addition, relying completely on yourself to accomplish every single thing and not leaning into the strength of our communities is a large contributor to eventual burnout. When considering burnout, the majority of research comes from workplace studies, however, there are several other categories to consider for a broader view. How you were raised, the family you have currently, the environment you live and work in, and your physical and mental health conditions all contribute toward burnout in their own ways. By setting aside time for self care, making necessary lifestyle changes, and really considering each of the burnout risk factors that you identify with, you can make lasting and significant changes that help you to prevent or heal from burnout.    The risk factors for burnout are too numerous to count, but they do all tend to fall into six main interconnected categories. By making improvements in one area, you are likely influencing several others at the same time. Tune into this week’s #straightfromcait episode for a conversation about the six categories of burnout risk factors. Learn what to keep an eye out for and what changes to make in order to positively influence your burnout recovery or even to prevent burnout before it occurs.    Quotes · “We might be talking about some sort of family trauma, and you have to know that that affects your environment. And that also affects your health. And it also affects your sense of self and how you function in the world. Right? So there's a lot going on here. Everything affects everything else.” (4:28-4:45 | Cait) · “A study that was combined between the World Health Organization and the International Labor Org showed that working 55 plus hours a week resulted in approximately three quarters of a million deaths over the course of a year through stroke and heart attack mostly. And this was shown to be especially true for those over 45.” (5:38-5:59 | Cait) · “If it is an epigenetic change, we can affect change on it. Because epigenetics are fluid, right? We can move them, they can change. But it does require a lot of self care.” (12:20-12:31 | Cait) · “If you did not have access to or take advantage of access to green space, being in nature, your overall health will suffer and your energy will suffer and increase your risk of burnout.” (12:58-13:09 | Cait)   Links  https://caitdonovan.as.me/free https://caitdonovan.as.me/inquiry   These references should be in the show notes: REFERENCES Bar, M., & Maital, N. (2007) Visual elements of subjective preference modulate amygdala activation.” Neuropsychologia. 45(10). pp. 2191-2200. 10.1016/j.neuropsychologia.2007.03.008. Berk, L. (2019). Exploring Adult and Adolescent Development. Pearson. Cht 3. Huberman Lab. (2022). Using light to optimize health. https://hubermanlab.com/using-light-sunlight-blue-light-and-red-light-to-optimize-health/ Ishizu, T., and Semir Z. (2011). Toward a brain-based theory of beauty. PLOS One, https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0021852. Maslach, C., Schaufeli, W.B., Leiter, M.P. (2001). Job burnout. Annual Reviews of Psychology. 52. 397-422 World Health Organization. (2021). Long working hours increasing deaths from heart disease and stroke. https://www.who.int/news/item/17-05-2021-long-working-hours-increasing-deaths-from-heart-disease-and-stroke-who-ilo XOXO, C   If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm

Nicole Kalil is a speaker, leadership strategist, respected coach, author, and podcast host. She spent 15 years working for a financial planning company where she was frequently the only woman in the room. After so many years of working hard for promotions, pushing down her feminine qualities in favor of leaning into more stereotypically masculine traits, Nicole realized she no longer even knew who she was authentically anymore. She had become so burned out that she hated her job, hated the people around her, and had lost herself in endless people-pleasing. Now Nicole helps other women to put aside gender expectations, regain their confidence, and learn to hear and trust their inner voices so that they can live authentically.    “Our confidence lives inside of us, and it's accessible anytime we want. We have just been socialized and received messaging to the contrary pretty much our whole lives,” explains Nicole Kalil. Due to the way girls are often socialized while growing up, many women falsely believe that confidence is something that exists externally. So much of societal conditioning tells women that confidence can be found by dressing a certain way, behaving a certain way, having perfect children, or having the right job. Nicole refers to this as the ‘confidence con’, because the truth is that confidence exists within everyone and it is accessible as soon as we choose to trust ourselves. The first step to regaining confidence is to learn how to listen for your inner voice and how to differentiate it from ‘head trash’ or how Nicole refers to the bullying voice that exists within our minds, usually consisting of mean statements from others. The easiest way to differentiate head trash from your true inner voice is that head trash is always mean. If you are speaking to yourself in a way that you’d never speak to a loved one, that is head trash.    We have been conditioned all our lives to believe that confidence exists externally and that we have to fit into certain societal standards in order to deserve it. The truth is that we are all deserving of confidence and it lives within us, ready for us to tap into at any time. Tune into today’s episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Nicole Kalil about the confidence con, how to differentiate head trash from your inner voice, and how to compost or recycle head trash into something that can help rather than hinder your growth.    Quotes · “I didn't know who I was authentically anymore. And I was hating my work, was hating the people I was doing it with, through no fault of their own, just because I had put myself in this position where I tried to show up and please everyone else, but myself.” (5:49-6:06 | Nicole) · “I think women far too often are waiting to be ready. They're waiting for the fear and the nervousness to go away and only have excitement and readiness. And I'm like, oh, gosh, we're waiting too long.” (12:34-12:48 | Nicole) · “Our confidence lives inside of us, and it's accessible anytime we want. We have just been socialized and received messaging to the contrary pretty much our whole lives.” (13:45-13:55 | Nicole)  · “I would encourage you to think about how you build trust with another person or how somebody else builds trust with you. That's probably going to give you the best insight into how you build trust with yourself.” (38:47-38:57 | Nicole)   Links   Connect with Nicole Kalil: www.nicolekalil.com https://nicolekalil.com/book https://www.instagram.com/nicolemkalil/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicolekalil/ http://eepurl.com/gOrQLL Join our community!      XOXO, C   If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait   https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/quiz   Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm