Heart of Dating

Dr. Diane talks about attachment theory and how childhood relationships impact adult relationships. She discusses the 4 styles of attachment and how singles can work on healing them to be ready for a healthier relationship.Now we know y'all know all about the enneagram, and myers briggs, and love languages and things like that… but there is actually a different tool based in science that has become one of the MOST useful tools for me in dating. It’s called attachment theory. And honestly you guys, we have been looking to find a psychologist for forever who is passionate about this, and at long awaited last, we discovered the amazing Dr. Diane.You guys are in for a TREAT today!Doctor Diane Strachowski has an undergraduate degree in Psychology, a Masters in Counseling and a Doctorate in Education. She did her postdoctoral studies at Stanford, where she received advanced training in Cognitive Behavioral therapy. Dr. Diane has worked on various clinical trials doing research on empirically validated treatments for a variety of health related issues.In the past twenty years her practice has evolved from working with patients with mood issues to becoming a relationship expert working with singles and couples. Her goal is to give people the best that psychology has to offer; she know what works and the difference that a healthy relationship can make in your life.Her life’s work is to support men, women, and couples to think about themselves and their relationships differently. Dr. Diane believes that your brain is the epicenter to opening your heart, and that science confirms that if you think positively about love you can feel and act positively.She is an incredible advocate for attachment theory and has even derived her OWN test and broken it down into 7 different types. You can take the quiz yourself by going to secureinlove.com.Today Dr. Diane so amazingly breaks down attachment theory, where it originated and how it applies today. She also details out the various different love attachment types and what the needs are for each type. We also talk about the silver lining of attachment theory and how you can actually HEAL.Crushing on a cutie? Download this FREE Resource on how to show interest:https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/how-to-show-interestWant to further your dating knowledge? Check out our ultimate dating library!https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/ultimate-dating-libraryKait wrote a book! Snag Thank You For Rejecting Me on Amazon:https://amzn.to/3E59cLQWant to meet some epic Christian Singles? Join our huge HOD Family on FB:https://www.facebook.com/groups/heartofdatingpodcastCome hang with us on the gram:http://instagram.com/heartofdatinghttp://instagram.com/kaitness. . . . . A quick thank you to some of our friends!Faithful Counseling: Our #1 resource for affordable, reliable, Christian therapy. You can get 10% off your first month by going to http://getfaithful.com/heartofdatingCompassion International: Do you have a burning desire to be a parent but feel stuck in singleness? Do you want to make lasting, powerful impact in your life as a single?We are a proud partner of Compassion International. Our community of singles has sponsored hundreds of kids all around the world, and we’d love to invite you to join us on this compelling mission.http://compassion.com/heartofdating Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Matt discusses spiritual leadership and talks about being equally yoked and discusses if it's the man's job and how we can practice spiritual leadership as a single. Heart of Dating welcomes Matt Ayers to the show! Matt is a close friend to Kait and he helped start Vintage Church in Santa Monica, CA. He’s been married for 6 years to his beautiful wife Stephanie. Matthew Ayers is a founding member, treasurer and executive board member of Vintage Church in LA. Outside of his involvement at the church, Matthew manages the investments of a handful of very wealthy families at Alex Brown. Matt lives in west Los Angeles with his wife, Stephanie and his two daughters, Riley and Dylan.He is a avid reader, a golfer and loves to travel. A few years ago Kait heard Matt speak on discipleship at their yearly church retreat, and she was blown away by his input, and convictions. Soon after, Kait tracked him down at a leadership event their church was throwing and asked him follow up questions. Since then Kait has gotten to know both him and his wife, Steph, and have grown to love both of them in how they do marriage and how them mentor and disciple others. Today Matt and Kait dive into the conversation of discipleship and spiritual leadership, and they talk about how that applies to men specifically in dating relationships. It’s an incredibly rich discussion. They even touch on gender roles and leadership at the end which is dynamite, so you will want to make sure you stay till the end to hear what they discuss! Crushing on a cutie? Download this FREE Resource on how to show interest: https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/how-to-show-interest Want to further your dating knowledge? Check out our ultimate dating library! https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/ultimate-dating-library Kait wrote a book! Snag Thank You For Rejecting Me on Amazon: https://amzn.to/3E59cLQ Want to meet some epic Christian Singles? Join our huge HOD Family on FB: https://www.facebook.com/groups/heartofdatingpodcast Come hang with us on the gram: http://instagram.com/heartofdating http://instagram.com/kaitness . . . . .  A quick thank you to some of our friends! Faithful Counseling: Our #1 resource for affordable, reliable, Christian therapy. You can get 10% off your first month by going to http://getfaithful.com/heartofdating Compassion International: Do you have a burning desire to be a parent but feel stuck in singleness? Do you want to make lasting, powerful impact in your life as a single? We are a proud partner of Compassion International. Our community of singles has sponsored hundreds of kids all around the world, and we’d love to invite you to join us on this compelling mission. http://compassion.com/heartofdating Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mandy tells her story of being an older single woman and how to battle comparison, being confident in yourself, and the idea of taking a dating break every now and then. Heart of Dating welcomes the incredible single woman herself, Mandy Hale, to the show today! Mandy is a blogger turned New York Times best-selling author and speaker. She is also the creator of the social media movement, “The Single Woman.” With a heart to inspire single women to live their best lives and to never, ever settle, Mandy cuts to the heart of the matter with her inspirational, straight-talking, witty, and often wildly humorous take on life and love. Mandy’s message reaches literally millions of women across the world every day through her blog, books, and social media platforms.Mandy has been named a “Twitter Powerhouse” by the Huffington Post, a “Woman of Influence” by the Nashville Business Journal, and a “Single in the City” by Nashville Lifestyles magazine. She has also been featured in Forbes magazine, the Huffington Post, Glamour.com and many other outlets. Crushing on a cutie? Download this FREE Resource on how to show interest: https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/how-to-show-interest Want to further your dating knowledge? Check out our ultimate dating library! https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/ultimate-dating-library Kait wrote a book! Snag Thank You For Rejecting Me on Amazon: https://amzn.to/3E59cLQ Want to meet some epic Christian Singles? Join our huge HOD Family on FB: https://www.facebook.com/groups/heartofdatingpodcast Come hang with us on the gram: http://instagram.com/heartofdating http://instagram.com/kaitness . . . . .  A quick thank you to some of our friends! Faithful Counseling: Our #1 resource for affordable, reliable, Christian therapy. You can get 10% off your first month by going to http://getfaithful.com/heartofdating Compassion International: Do you have a burning desire to be a parent but feel stuck in singleness? Do you want to make lasting, powerful impact in your life as a single? We are a proud partner of Compassion International. Our community of singles has sponsored hundreds of kids all around the world, and we’d love to invite you to join us on this compelling mission. http://compassion.com/heartofdating Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Gary Thomas talks about when and how to walk away from someone and what signs tell you that they are indeed a toxic person to be with. Heart of Dating is excited to welcome back Gary Thomas to the show! Gary Thomas was on one of Heart of Dating’s first episodes as he talked about the myth of soulmates. You can listen to that episode HERE (https://heartofdating.com/009-infatuation-the-myth-of-the-soulmate-with-gary-thomas/) Gary Thomas is the author of over 19 books including The Sacred Search and The Sacred Marriage. He is the process of releasing his new book When to Walk Away! On this episode Kait and Gary talk about how to tell if someone is toxic and when to walk away from an unhealthy relationship. Crushing on a cutie? Download this FREE Resource on how to show interest: https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/how-to-show-interest Want to further your dating knowledge? Check out our ultimate dating library! https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/ultimate-dating-library Kait wrote a book! Snag Thank You For Rejecting Me on Amazon: https://amzn.to/3E59cLQ Want to meet some epic Christian Singles? Join our huge HOD Family on FB: https://www.facebook.com/groups/heartofdatingpodcast Come hang with us on the gram: http://instagram.com/heartofdating http://instagram.com/kaitness . . . . .  A quick thank you to some of our friends! Faithful Counseling: Our #1 resource for affordable, reliable, Christian therapy. You can get 10% off your first month by going to http://getfaithful.com/heartofdating Compassion International: Do you have a burning desire to be a parent but feel stuck in singleness? Do you want to make lasting, powerful impact in your life as a single? We are a proud partner of Compassion International. Our community of singles has sponsored hundreds of kids all around the world, and we’d love to invite you to join us on this compelling mission. http://compassion.com/heartofdating Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Kait vulnerably opens up about her own story of physical, emotional, and sexual abuse. Trigger Warning: Please be advised that for this episode, Kait goes into detail about her abuse story. Keep in mind that if this is a topic that is sensitive for you, proceed and listen with caution to avoid potential triggers. If you or someone you know is facing an abusive relationship, please call the National Domestic Abuse Hotline at 1-(800)-799-7233 We have an extra special episode for Heart of Dating Listeners today. Today we have our very own host Kait Warman share her personal story and testimony on abuse. Kait shares her heart by talking about her own personal experiences in being in an emotionally and physically abusive relationship. Kait also shares wisdom as how to overcome gaslighting and overall how to heal from the trauma following an abusive relationship.  Crushing on a cutie? Download this FREE Resource on how to show interest: https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/how-to-show-interest Want to further your dating knowledge? Check out our ultimate dating library! https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/ultimate-dating-library Kait wrote a book! Snag Thank You For Rejecting Me on Amazon: https://amzn.to/3E59cLQ Want to meet some epic Christian Singles? Join our huge HOD Family on FB: https://www.facebook.com/groups/heartofdatingpodcast Come hang with us on the gram: http://instagram.com/heartofdating http://instagram.com/kaitness . . . . .  A quick thank you to some of our friends! Faithful Counseling: Our #1 resource for affordable, reliable, Christian therapy. You can get 10% off your first month by going to http://getfaithful.com/heartofdating Compassion International: Do you have a burning desire to be a parent but feel stuck in singleness? Do you want to make lasting, powerful impact in your life as a single? We are a proud partner of Compassion International. Our community of singles has sponsored hundreds of kids all around the world, and we’d love to invite you to join us on this compelling mission. http://compassion.com/heartofdating Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ally talks about emotional abuse and defines what gaslighting is. She also goes into signs of an abusive person. Heart of Dating welcome the incredibly Allison Fallon to the show this week. Ally writes books, helps people write books and believes a regular practice of writing can change your life. She is the author of 12 books (and counting) sought-after public speaker and coach to hundreds of authors from New York Times Bestsellers to total beginners. She has spent the last decade coaching hundreds of people to gain confidence, overcome writer’s block and get their stories on paper. Even if you say, “I’m not a writer” she can show you how a daily practice of writing can improve your sleep, your focus, your creativity, your productivity, and even your relationships.  Also, Allison recently launched a BRAND NEW website called, findyourvoice.com. This brand new site has tons of resources to help people get started in a practice of writing for the first time—something you can use for self-discovery, spirituality, self-therapy or a way to process something that’s happened to them that they don’t understand (even a break-up!). We highly encourage you to check it out! This week Allison and Kait talk about abuse, both emotional and physical aspects. What are the signs? Why do people stay in relationships? How do you know that you should get out of a relationship? They also discuss the term gaslighting, and how that plays out in relationships. Crushing on a cutie? Download this FREE Resource on how to show interest: https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/how-to-show-interest Want to further your dating knowledge? Check out our ultimate dating library! https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/ultimate-dating-library Kait wrote a book! Snag Thank You For Rejecting Me on Amazon: https://amzn.to/3E59cLQ Want to meet some epic Christian Singles? Join our huge HOD Family on FB: https://www.facebook.com/groups/heartofdatingpodcast Come hang with us on the gram: http://instagram.com/heartofdating http://instagram.com/kaitness . . . . .  A quick thank you to some of our friends! Faithful Counseling: Our #1 resource for affordable, reliable, Christian therapy. You can get 10% off your first month by going to http://getfaithful.com/heartofdating Compassion International: Do you have a burning desire to be a parent but feel stuck in singleness? Do you want to make lasting, powerful impact in your life as a single? We are a proud partner of Compassion International. Our community of singles has sponsored hundreds of kids all around the world, and we’d love to invite you to join us on this compelling mission. http://compassion.com/heartofdating Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Margaret Nagib talks about soul is - what are they, how do you get them, and how do you break them. Heart of Dating has a full heart welcoming Dr. Margaret Nagib to the episode today. She is a close friend to Kait and a clinical psychologist specializing in Christian counseling, inner healing, personal and spiritual development as well as treating eating disorders, trauma, self-injury and mood disorders. She received her masters and doctorate in clinical psychology from Wheaton College in Wheaton, IL. and has also graduated from 2 years of Bethel Church’s Supernatural School of Ministry in Redding, CA.  In addition to serving clients in her private practice in downtown Wheaton, Dr. Nagib travels around the country and internationally providing seminars for various organizations and churches. Her passion and calling is partnering with Holy Spirit to restore wholeness through a deeper relationship with God, helping each person reclaim their identity, purpose and passion.  As an expert on emotional and spiritual wholeness, Dr. Nagib has written articles for Relevant magazine, Addiction Professional, and The American Association of Christian Counselors, She has been featured in the Wall Street Journal, Today’s Christian Woman, and on the Trinity Broadcasting Network, Fox News, and various radio programs nationwide including Dr. James Dobson’s Family Talk. . Dr. Nagib is also the author of Souls Like Stars: Renew Your Mind, Heal Your Heart, Unveil Your Shine. Crushing on a cutie? Download this FREE Resource on how to show interest: https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/how-to-show-interest Want to further your dating knowledge? Check out our ultimate dating library! https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/ultimate-dating-library Kait wrote a book! Snag Thank You For Rejecting Me on Amazon: https://amzn.to/3E59cLQ Want to meet some epic Christian Singles? Join our huge HOD Family on FB: https://www.facebook.com/groups/heartofdatingpodcast Come hang with us on the gram: http://instagram.com/heartofdating http://instagram.com/kaitness . . . . .  A quick thank you to some of our friends! Faithful Counseling: Our #1 resource for affordable, reliable, Christian therapy. You can get 10% off your first month by going to http://getfaithful.com/heartofdating Compassion International: Do you have a burning desire to be a parent but feel stuck in singleness? Do you want to make lasting, powerful impact in your life as a single? We are a proud partner of Compassion International. Our community of singles has sponsored hundreds of kids all around the world, and we’d love to invite you to join us on this compelling mission. http://compassion.com/heartofdating Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Bianca talks about "acceptable stalking" how to date well without pressure, evaluation in dating and in yourself, how to prep for marriage, and how women can show interest first. She also discusses and encourages women to be clearer when it comes to communicating to men.WELCOME TO SEASON 4!!! Today we are kicking off SEASON 4 of the Heart of Dating Podcast and it feels SO SURREAL, We have been around now for a year and a half… so many of you have been here and growing with us or if you are new, HI! We are SO HAPPY you are here. We are ready and refreshed and ready to deliver amazing content to y'all for the 4th season.For the first episode of season 4, Heart of Dating is thrilled to welcome back Bianca Olthoff to the show! Bianca is a speaker, author, and pastor at The Father’s House church in Orange Country. She’s been married to her husband for 9 year and is committed for others to know Jesus on a deep level of purpose. She recently also just released her brand new book How to Have Your Life Not Suck which talks about taking initiative of your life in Christ for a better future! Her book is separated into 3 sections: dating, faith and spirituality, and overall “adulting”. This week, Biana talks to Kait specifically on how to have your dating life NOT suck!Crushing on a cutie? Download this FREE Resource on how to show interest:https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/how-to-show-interestWant to further your dating knowledge? Check out our ultimate dating library!https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/ultimate-dating-libraryKait wrote a book! Snag Thank You For Rejecting Me on Amazon:https://amzn.to/3E59cLQWant to meet some epic Christian Singles? Join our huge HOD Family on FB:https://www.facebook.com/groups/heartofdatingpodcastCome hang with us on the gram:http://instagram.com/heartofdatinghttp://instagram.com/kaitness. . . . . A quick thank you to some of our friends!Faithful Counseling: Our #1 resource for affordable, reliable, Christian therapy. You can get 10% off your first month by going to http://getfaithful.com/heartofdatingCompassion International: Do you have a burning desire to be a parent but feel stuck in singleness? Do you want to make lasting, powerful impact in your life as a single?We are a proud partner of Compassion International. Our community of singles has sponsored hundreds of kids all around the world, and we’d love to invite you to join us on this compelling mission.http://compassion.com/heartofdating Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mike talks about signs to look for to see if YOU are codependent. Mike Foster is such a wonderful human being you guys. He is a best-selling author, speaker, and advocate for not-so-perfect people. He has an INCREDIBLE podcast, Fun Therapy, which Kait actually had the pleasure of being on during Season 3 (go take a listen!). Y’all Mike has such a way of SEEING people, connecting with them, and making them feel understood and comfortable.Mike also has a book that he published with his wife Jennifer called FIVE dates. It’s a a His and Her workbook to help couples connect. Kait has personally used it and can honestly tell you it has been SO impactful in my dating life to foster gratitude, connection, and deeper understanding. Today we discuss a bit about CODEPENDENCY 101! Crushing on a cutie? Download this FREE Resource on how to show interest: https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/how-to-show-interest Want to further your dating knowledge? Check out our ultimate dating library! https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/ultimate-dating-library Kait wrote a book! Snag Thank You For Rejecting Me on Amazon: https://amzn.to/3E59cLQ Want to meet some epic Christian Singles? Join our huge HOD Family on FB: https://www.facebook.com/groups/heartofdatingpodcast Come hang with us on the gram: http://instagram.com/heartofdating http://instagram.com/kaitness . . . . .  A quick thank you to some of our friends! Faithful Counseling: Our #1 resource for affordable, reliable, Christian therapy. You can get 10% off your first month by going to http://getfaithful.com/heartofdating Compassion International: Do you have a burning desire to be a parent but feel stuck in singleness? Do you want to make lasting, powerful impact in your life as a single? We are a proud partner of Compassion International. Our community of singles has sponsored hundreds of kids all around the world, and we’d love to invite you to join us on this compelling mission. http://compassion.com/heartofdating Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ben talks about the evaluation process to see if someone is a good match for your for a potential spouse.Kait got the privilege of sitting down with Ben Stuart who is not only an author but also the pastor of Passion City Church, Washington D.C. He has a LOT to say about dating and this entire process and it is SO good. Prior to joining Passion City Church, Ben served for 11 years as the executive director of Breakaway Ministries, a weekly Bible study attended by thousands of college students at Texas A&M. Him and and his wife, Donna, live to inspire and equip people to walk with God for a lifetime… and they also have one heck of an incredible dating story!Crushing on a cutie? Download this FREE Resource on how to show interest:https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/how-to-show-interestWant to further your dating knowledge? Check out our ultimate dating library!https://www.heartofdating.com/resource/ultimate-dating-libraryKait wrote a book! Snag Thank You For Rejecting Me on Amazon:https://amzn.to/3E59cLQWant to meet some epic Christian Singles? Join our huge HOD Family on FB:https://www.facebook.com/groups/heartofdatingpodcastCome hang with us on the gram:http://instagram.com/heartofdatinghttp://instagram.com/kaitness. . . . . A quick thank you to some of our friends!Faithful Counseling: Our #1 resource for affordable, reliable, Christian therapy. You can get 10% off your first month by going to http://getfaithful.com/heartofdatingCompassion International: Do you have a burning desire to be a parent but feel stuck in singleness? Do you want to make lasting, powerful impact in your life as a single?We are a proud partner of Compassion International. Our community of singles has sponsored hundreds of kids all around the world, and we’d love to invite you to join us on this compelling mission.http://compassion.com/heartofdating Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices