Reflective Parenting by Curious Neuron

Cindy Hovington, Ph.D.

A parenting podcast that doesn't tell you HOW to parent your own child. We teach you how to think during parenting challenges and help you build emotional intelligence skills to lower your stress and help you cope with those challenging emotions that come with parenting.Neuroscientist, Dr. Cindy Hovington can help you parent your child with confidence and feel competent by helping you understand your triggers, recognize and break your emotional patterns and teach you how to model healthy emotional coping skills for your child. Cindy is the founder and CEO of Curious Neuron, is an internationally recognized emotional well-being resource for parents with their evidence-based educational content being consumed in over 70 countries! She is a leading thought expert in emotion regulation and parental well-being as well as an international speaker on well-being and emotional development in children. The goal of this podcast is to help parents gain awareness of their emotional triggers, build your confidence as a parent, understand how their past influences behavioural patterns they can stuck in and help them learn how to model healthy emotional coping skills for their children. We do this by discussing the science of emotional intelligence and effective parenting practices. Join us every Monday for conversations with leading researchers and best selling authors in parental well-being, childhood adversity, attachment, emotional development, stress management and emotion regulation skills. Past guests include Dr. Bruce Perry, Dr. Marc Brackett and best-selling authors Dr. Ramani Durvasula and Stephanie Harrison.Join me and become a Reflective Parent! Subscribe today not to miss next week's episode! To learn more from Curious Neuron or to join The Reflective Parent Club, visit www.curiousneuron.com.Follow us on Instagram @curious_neuron.

Episodes

Mentioned books

Aug 18, 2025 • 54min

Replay: Looking beyond your child's behaviour with Dr. Mona Delahooke

Send us a textI am going to be taking a short break. Meanwhile, enjoy this replay of one of my favourite episodes with Dr. Mona Delahooke. If you have a young child that has tantrums or that acts out in ways you don't know how to support, this episode will help you understand how to support your child in these challenging moments. Learn more from Dr. Delahooke below:https://monadelahooke.com/More ways to build emotion regulation skills with Curious Neuron! Record your message to ask a question, share an insight or give us some feedback! https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcast Start your 7 day FREE trial of the Reflective Parent Club A science-based course that helps you learn how to cope with emotions, stress, your child's behaviour and your partner! Plus, a weekly coaching call to help you build awareness and practice new tools. https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/ Join our FREE Monthly Parental Well-Being Webinar Series: https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/989145490b Grab a Free Resource: FREE Workbook: Staying Calm When Your Child Isn’t: A Parent’s Guide to Triggers and Emotions FREE Kids Activity: Help! My Emotions Are Confusing Email: info@curiousneuron.com 📸 Instagram | 🧠 Reflective Parenting F...

Aug 11, 2025 • 35min

Is my child ready for kindergarten readiness? (emotionally)

Send us a textIs your child ready for kindergarten from an emotional perspective?In this episode, Cindy discusses the emotional aspects of kindergarten readiness, emphasizing the importance of emotional intelligence and self-awareness in children. She introduces the tripartite model of parental socialization, which highlights how parents' emotional coping, parenting styles, and conflict resolution impact children's emotional development. The conversation also covers practical strategies for parents to support their children's emotional growth and prepare them for school.TakeawaysKindergarten readiness involves emotional preparation, not just academic skills.Self-awareness is crucial for coping with emotions.Parents should model emotional regulation for their children.Understanding triggers helps children manage their emotions better.Emotional intelligence is built through conversations about feelings.Expecting children to be emotionally perfect is unrealistic.Parental emotional coping styles influence children's behavior.Setting boundaries while being sensitive is key in parenting.Conflict resolution in the home teaches children about emotions.Curiosity and relationship-building are essential for school readiness.Don't miss these podcast episodes:https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/reflective-parenting-by-curious-neuron/id1440533170?i=1000720552759https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/reflective-parenting-by-curious-neuron/id1440533170?i=1000715100953More ways to build emotion regulation skills with Curious Neuron! Record your message to ask a question, share an insight or give us some feedback! https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcast Start your 7 day FREE trial of the Reflective Parent Club A science-based course that helps you learn how to cope with emotions, stress, your child's behaviour and your partner! Plus, a weekly coaching call to help you build awareness and practice new tools. https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/ Join our FREE Monthly Parental Well-Being Webinar Series: https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/989145490b Grab a Free Resource: FREE Workbook: Staying Calm When Your Child Isn’t: A Parent’s Guide to Triggers and Emotions FREE Kids Activity: Help! My Emotions Are Confusing Email: info@curiousneuron.com 📸 Instagram | 🧠 Reflective Parenting F...

Aug 4, 2025 • 27min

A science-based tool that helps you shift your perspective (and build your resilience)

Send us a textIn this episode, we explore the idea of “shifting your lens” — a powerful metaphor grounded in science that helps parents understand how their interpretation of a situation shapes their emotional response. Drawing on the work of psychologist James Gross and his research on cognitive reappraisal, we break down how the lens you’re wearing (like blame, control, or shame) can fuel conflict and dysregulation, especially in moments of parenting stress.You’ll learn how to identify the lens you’re in, how to shift your lens to something more helpful (like curiosity or compassion), and how this shift not only supports your own regulation but also helps you model emotional intelligence for your child. Real-life parenting examples, practical tips, and reflection prompts will help you bring this tool into everyday moments even when things get messy.Read our blog post here:https://curiousneuron.com/2025/08/03/how-to-shift-your-lens-and-stay-calm-in-parenting-conflicts/Read a science article:For Whom and What Does Cognitive Reappraisal Help? A ProspectiveStudyWatch it on YouTube:https://youtu.be/TOURlBqtmIcMore ways to build emotion regulation skills with Curious Neuron! Record your message to ask a question, share an insight or give us some feedback! https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcast Start your 7 day FREE trial of the Reflective Parent Club A science-based course that helps you learn how to cope with emotions, stress, your child's behaviour and your partner! Plus, a weekly coaching call to help you build awareness and practice new tools. https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/ Join our FREE Monthly Parental Well-Being Webinar Series: https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/989145490b Grab a Free Resource: FREE Workbook: Staying Calm When Your Child Isn’t: A Parent’s Guide to Triggers and Emotions FREE Kids Activity: Help! My Emotions Are Confusing Email: info@curiousneuron.com 📸 Instagram | 🧠 Reflective Parenting F...

Jul 28, 2025 • 32min

Invalidation in your relationship: Understanding the impact of dismissing emotions

Send us a textIn this podcast episode, I delve into invalidation and its significant impact on romantic relationships. I highlight common invalidating statements such as "Why are you upset?", "You're overreacting," or "Calm down," explaining that these make a partner feel their emotions are wrong, unjustified, or excessive. This can lead to increased frustration, shame, and a sense of being alone in their struggle, mirroring the hurt children feel when invalidated.I emphasize the importance of using validating alternatives, such as "I see that you're feeling upset. Can you tell me what's making you feel this way?" or "It sounds like you're feeling anxious right now. That must be really uncomfortable. How can I support you?". These phrases aim to make the partner feel seen and heard, fostering connection and reducing conflict.I then introduce a study on marital conflict behaviors, categorizing them into three styles:•Destructive: Includes actions like yelling, insults, criticism, or bringing up past issues.•Constructive: Involves calm discussion, active listening, saying nice things, or trying to make a spouse laugh.•Withdrawal: Entails disengaging, such as becoming quiet or leaving the situation.The study found that, as expected, husbands and wives who reported using more destructive behaviors had a higher rate of divorce. A particularly fascinating and counter-intuitive finding was that greater constructive behaviors among wives predicted greater divorce rates. Learn more in this episode!Listen to my conversation with author of Validation, Dr. Caroline Fleck:https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/reflective-parenting-by-curious-neuron/id1440533170?i=1000715100953Read the full study:https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3777640/pdf/nihms494814.pdfMore ways to build emotion regulation skills with Curious Neuron! Record your message to ask a question, share an insight or give us some feedback! https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcast Start your 7 day FREE trial of the Reflective Parent Club A science-based course that helps you learn how to cope with emotions, stress, your child's behaviour and your partner! Plus, a weekly coaching call to help you build awareness and practice new tools. https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/ Join our FREE Monthly Parental Well-Being Webinar Series: https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/989145490b Grab a Free Resource: FREE Workbook: Staying Calm When Your Child Isn’t: A Parent’s Guide to Triggers and Emotions FREE Kids Activity: Help! My Emotions Are Confusing Email: info@curiousneuron.com 📸 Instagram | 🧠 Reflective Parenting F...

Jun 30, 2025 • 60min

Psychologist shares how learning the skill of validation can transform your relationships

Send us a textDo you ever wonder why your child’s big emotions feel so overwhelming—or why small conflicts with your partner can spiral? In this episode, I sit down with psychologist Dr. Caroline Fleck to unpack the skill of validation—what it is, why it matters, and how it can radically change the way you connect with yourself, your kids, and everyone you love.We explore what invalidation really sounds like (it’s often subtle) and why even well-meaning parents can accidentally shut down their child’s emotions. Dr. Fleck shares simple, powerful scripts for validating feelings without condoning hurtful behaviors, and we discuss research showing how invalidation increases the risk of mental health struggles and gets passed across generations.Whether you’re parenting a toddler or a teen—or just want more connected relationships—this episode will give you tools to break cycles of invalidation and build deeper trust through emotional clarity.Don’t miss this conversation—because learning to “validate the valid” might be the most important parenting skill you ever master.Sources:Caroline's Book: Validation (amazon.ca and amazon.com)Science Sources:Examining the intergenerational transmission of parental invalidation: Extension of the biosocial modelParental Validation and Invalidation Predict Adolescent Self- HarmMore ways to build emotion regulation skills with Curious Neuron! Record your message to ask a question, share an insight or give us some feedback! https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcast Start your 7 day FREE trial of the Reflective Parent Club A science-based course that helps you learn how to cope with emotions, stress, your child's behaviour and your partner! Plus, a weekly coaching call to help you build awareness and practice new tools. https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/ Join our FREE Monthly Parental Well-Being Webinar Series: https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/989145490b Grab a Free Resource: FREE Workbook: Staying Calm When Your Child Isn’t: A Parent’s Guide to Triggers and Emotions FREE Kids Activity: Help! My Emotions Are Confusing Email: info@curiousneuron.com 📸 Instagram | 🧠 Reflective Parenting F...

Jun 22, 2025 • 46min

What Happens When You Let Kids Just Be Kids? (And Why It Matters)

Send us a textwith Amy ChiuIn today’s fast-paced world, it can be tough to slow down and truly let kids be kids. We often get caught up in schedules, expectations, and the pressure to “make learning happen.” But what if the most powerful learning happens when we pause, play, and simply show up with presence?In this episode, Dr. Cindy Hovington speaks with early childhood expert Amy Chiu about the magic of free play and the importance of slowing down. Amy explains how play isn’t just fun—it’s a key tool for building curiosity, emotional regulation, and problem-solving. She shares why giving kids space to lead their play fosters deeper learning than worksheets ever could.Whether you're a parent, caregiver, or educator, you'll find science-backed insights and simple, practical ways to support your child—by doing less.🔑 What You’ll Hear:Why slowing down and free play matter for real learningHow presence and pause transform connectionThe power of observing rather than directing kids’ playSimple ways to bring downtime and emotional check-ins into daily lifeRelated Podcast Episode:Over-parenting (helicopter parenting)Mentioned in This Episode: 📖 The Work of Play→ Amy Chiu’s website and resource hub for parents and educators reimagining early childhood learning.Follow Amy on LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/amy-chiu-msed-a09a1a27b/Scientific Article: Learning Through Play at School – A Framework for Policy and PracticeMore ways to build emotion regulation skills with Curious Neuron! Record your message to ask a question, share an insight or give us some feedback! https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcast Start your 7 day FREE trial of the Reflective Parent Club A science-based course that helps you learn how to cope with emotions, stress, your child's behaviour and your partner! Plus, a weekly coaching call to help you build awareness and practice new tools. https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/ Join our FREE Monthly Parental Well-Being Webinar Series: https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/989145490b Grab a Free Resource: FREE Workbook: Staying Calm When Your Child Isn’t: A Parent’s Guide to Triggers and Emotions FREE Kids Activity: Help! My Emotions Are Confusing Email: info@curiousneuron.com 📸 Instagram | 🧠 Reflective Parenting F...

Jun 16, 2025 • 26min

How not having a present father impacted my life

Send us a textIn today's solo episode, I share a little more of my personal story with the hopes of helping you feel validated, less alone or even empowered. Father's Day (or even Mother's Day) can be difficult when you have a parent that is alive yet you have no idea where they are because they left your family decades ago. They knew you existed and they chose to leave you. I share a little more about my childhood and about how that impacted me later when I became a parent. Do you have a story you want to share (anonymously) with me about your own dad or your journey as a dad? Click the link below!https://curiousneuron.typeform.com/to/kd6zw438Here is the study I referred to in the episode in case you want more details. https://www.cambridge.org/core/services/aop-cambridge-core/content/view/1342C24F368FB2953C342AFF875E04A6/S0954579423000354a.pdf/div-class-title-father-contribution-to-human-resilience-div.pdfIf you are a dad ready to learn how to cope and regulate your emotions, try out the Reflective Parent Club, free for 7 days before committing. See link below. More ways to build emotion regulation skills with Curious Neuron! Record your message to ask a question, share an insight or give us some feedback! https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcast Start your 7 day FREE trial of the Reflective Parent Club A science-based course that helps you learn how to cope with emotions, stress, your child's behaviour and your partner! Plus, a weekly coaching call to help you build awareness and practice new tools. https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/ Join our FREE Monthly Parental Well-Being Webinar Series: https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/989145490b Grab a Free Resource: FREE Workbook: Staying Calm When Your Child Isn’t: A Parent’s Guide to Triggers and Emotions FREE Kids Activity: Help! My Emotions Are Confusing Email: info@curiousneuron.com 📸 Instagram | 🧠 Reflective Parenting F...

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