Slate Conversations

On this episode: Zak, Jamilah and Elizabeth help a listener who feels like a failure for leaning on YouTube to get their energetic 10-month-old to chill out — so they can handle household stuff for 30 minutes a day. Is this something to feel bad about?We also go over our week in triumphs and fails, and listen in on a real-time parenting moment for Zak. Then, if you have Slate Plus, Elizabeth and Jamilah tackle some common issues that crop up for us around the holidays.Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318. If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Mom and Dad are Fighting. Sign up now at slate.com/momanddadplus to help support our work.Podcast produced by Maura Currie. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this week’s episode of The Waves, what’s it like to be an indie musician? Slate senior producer Cheyna Roth is joined by singer and songwriter Dessa. They dig into her newest album and how she has benefited from and been hurt by being a woman in the music industry. Later in the show they explore the breakup song - and all the gendered expectations that go along with writing one. In Slate Plus: What do a dentist, neuroscientists, and puppeteers all have in common? They’ve worked with Dessa.If you liked this episode, check out: Penis Politics Podcast production by Cheyna Roth and Vic Whitley-Berry with editorial oversight by Daisy Rosario and Alicia Montgomery.Send your comments and recommendations on what to cover to thewaves@slate.com.Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/thewavesplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On today’s episode of Hear Me Out… lovable underdogs?For a long time, we’ve been sold — and we’ve bought — the idea of the nerd hero; usually a man, usually brilliant, and usually a social outcast who, inevitably, gets the girl. That was the happy ending.But now, we’re surrounded by powerful, self-styled nerds who have it all and still want more. And, to some, it’s increasingly hard to root for these guys.Ian Bogost, a writer and video game designer, joins us. If you have thoughts you want to share, or an idea for a topic we should tackle, you can email the show: hearmeout@slate.comPodcast production by Maura CurrieYou can skip all the ads in Hear Me Out by joining Slate Plus. Sign up now at slate.com/hearmeoutplus for just $15 a month for your first three months. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

To celebrate their third wedding anniversary, Anjali and Rahul are each selecting a surprise activity to do together. This happy couple loves spontaneity, so they’re concerned about someday growing bored in their relationship. They’re also feeling pressure to mark the traditional milestones of marriage, including having kids. On this episode of How To!, authors Caryl and Jay Casbon join us to share the wisdom they gained from interviewing other married couples for their book Side by Side. The Casbons draw upon their own 22-year marriage to urge Anjali and Rahul to face conflict with openness and focus on individual “inner work”—in order to grow together. Learn more about Caryl and Jay Casbon here. If you liked this episode, check out an episode that Anjali loved: How To Decide Whether to Have a Baby with Wild author Cheryl Strayed. Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen.How To’s executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis and Jabari Butler. Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week, host Isaac Butler talks to Raja Feather Kelly, a choreographer and director who works both on Broadway and with his dance-theatre-media company, The Feath3r Theory. In the interview, Raja discusses the useful systems and strategies he’s developed with his collaborators at The Feath3r Theory and how he’s able to apply some of that wisdom to his work on Broadway. He also shares the process behind his upcoming show, The Absolute Future of the Multiverse of How to Cover the Sun with Mud. After the interview, Isaac and co-host June Thomas discuss the “big emotions” that drive their work. In the exclusive Slate Plus segment, Raja discusses his long-time obsession with Andy Warhol.  Send your questions about creativity and any other feedback to working@slate.com or give us a call at (304) 933-9675.Podcast production by Cameron Drews.If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Working. Sign up now at slate.com/workingplus to help support our work. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this week’s episode of The Waves, Gerry visits the hometowns of the last 3 women standing on The Golden Bachelor. Unlike hometown dates in the past, Gerry isn’t meeting the parents. Instead, he’s getting to know the women’s kids and their grandkids. But it doesn’t make the hometown dates any less cringe. Slate Senior Producer Cheyna Roth and Dating While Gray host Laura Stassi recap the episode.Podcast production by Cheyna Roth and Vic Whitley-Berry with editorial oversight by Daisy Rosario and Alicia Montgomery.Send your comments and recommendations on what to cover to thewaves@slate.com.If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on The Waves. Sign up now at slate.com/thewavesplus to help support our work. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, the co-hosts of Slate’s ICYMI, Rachelle Hampton and Candice Lim, join Prudie (Jenée Desmond-Harris) to answer letters from readers about whether the following categories of people are unreasonable: moms who bring their kids to wineries, boyfriends who refuse to hard launch their girlfriends on social media, and husbands who are suspicious of their wives’ friendships with single men.If you want more Dear Prudence, join Slate Plus, Slate’s membership program. Jenée answers an extra question every week, just for members. Go to Slate.com/prudieplus to sign up. It’s just $15 for your first three months. Podcast production by Se’era Spragley Ricks and Daisy Rosario, with help from Maura Currie. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Note: This episode contains discussions of murder and grief. Listener discretion is advised between 6:30 and 12:00 of this episode. You can read more about Sam Woll, a close friend of Zak’s family, here.On this episode: Jamilah Lemieux, Elizabeth Newcamp, and Zak Rosen help a listener who’s worried that her son’s play is skewing a little too much toward good guys, bad guys, and violence. What’s the difference between normal play and a red flag – and how can we make sure boys want to include girls?Zak found two great resources for this listener that we want to share: an article about violent play from Parents.com, and a book called Under Deadman's Skin: Discovering the Meaning of Children's Violent Play.We also go over our week in triumphs and fails — and then, if you’re sticking around for Slate Plus, we discuss an episode of RadioLab that got us thinking about how kids change our perception of time.Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318. If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Mom and Dad are Fighting. Sign up now at slate.com/momanddadplus to help support our work.Podcast produced by Maura Currie. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this week’s episode of The Waves, the next presidential election is one year away and we are entering a storm of macho man politics. Slate senior producer Cheyna Roth is joined by NPR politics reporter Danielle Kurtzleben to talk about why men keep talking about their manly-men bonafides, how that affects women trying to be in politics, and more. More From Danielle and Mentioned in the Episode:  All the Things I Wish Someone Had Told Me Before I Gave Birth by Danielle Kurtzleben  The Race I Will Watch Most Closely in 2024 (Besides President) by Danielle Kurtzleben  A Professional Lady Correspondent Stares Down Motherhood by Danielle Kurtzleben  Male Democratic Candidates Will Have To Answer Gender Role Questions In 2020 Race by Danielle Kurtzleben  How 2022 Became the Year of Over-the-Top Masculinity in Politics by Bill Donahue  In Slate Plus: A check-in on new mom Danielle and whether she has in fact become a “mom” or just a person with a kid.If you liked this episode, check out: Are “Cool Moms” A Menace? Podcast production by Cheyna Roth and Vic Whitley-Berry with editorial oversight by Daisy Rosario and Alicia Montgomery.Send your comments and recommendations on what to cover to thewaves@slate.com.Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/thewavesplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On today’s episode of Hear Me Out… the veil is thin.It’s easy to forget, between the plastic skeletons and cheap chocolate, that Halloween was — and is, for many cultures — very much about the reality of death. As the Northern Hemisphere goes dormant for the winter, it’s worth remembering that the circle of life includes death. And instead of a punchline or a thing to be feared, we might actually celebrate death, when we can. And who better to consult on how to do that than modern-day witches?Helen Berger, sociologist and researcher at Brandeis University, joins us to discuss.If you have thoughts you want to share, or an idea for a topic we should tackle, you can email the show: hearmeout@slate.comPodcast production by Maura CurrieYou can skip all the ads in Hear Me Out by joining Slate Plus. Sign up now at slate.com/hearmeoutplus for just $15 a month for your first three months. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices