The Modern Therapist's Survival Guide with Curt Widhalm and Katie Vernoy

Exploring Systemic Trauma and Relational Privilege with BIPOC and LGBTQI Couples: An interview with Akilah Riley-RichardsonCurt and Katie chat with Akilah Riley Richardson, MSW about the challenges therapists face when working with BIPOC and LGBTQI couples. Akilah discusses the impact of systemic trauma, how it affects relationships, and the importance of creating therapeutic models tailored to marginalized communities. She introduces The PRIDE Model for therapy and The BIOME Stance for therapists, offering actionable strategies for inclusive, trauma-informed care.Transcripts for this episode will be available at mtsgpodcast.com!In this podcast episode, we talk with Akilah Riley-Richardson about what therapists get wrong when working with BIPOC and LGBTQI couplesToo often, couples counselors take traditional models and make slight tweaks for couples from marginalized backgrounds, with little success. Akilah Riley-Richardson has developed a stance and a new model to help support therapists in doing more effective work with these couples.  Understanding Systemic Trauma in Therapy Defining systemic trauma: Chronic, unpredictable, and disenfranchised trauma caused by systemic forces (education, legal, and healthcare systems). Examples of systemic trauma: Microaggressions, mispronounced names, assumptions about authority roles, and misgendering. Effects on individuals and relationships: Reduced sense of safety, rejection sensitivity, emotional disconnect, and difficulty setting boundaries. Challenges in Therapy with BIPOC and LGBTQI Couples Common therapist mistakes: Ignoring systemic realities and the impact of privilege. Adapting existing models without acknowledging their white, cishet origins. Failing to create trauma-informed, inclusive frameworks. Importance of relational privilege: Self-acceptance, social acceptance, and feeling protected in relationships. The PRIDE Model & The BIOME Stance from Akilah Riley-Richardson PRIDE Model for Therapy: Relational curiosity: Actively exploring the client's lived experiences. Setting intentions: Creating space for safety and vulnerability. Trauma work: Addressing systemic trauma's long-term impact on relationships. BIOME Stance for Therapists: Bravery: Facing discomfort in recognizing privilege. Intimacy: Fostering deep emotional connections. Openness: Being receptive to client experiences. Micro-liberatory movements: Small but impactful actions toward social justice. Epistemic embracing: Validating client knowledge and lived experiences. How Therapists Can Engage Clients in Systemic Trauma Work Transparency in therapy: Clearly communicating the goal of liberation. Allowing resistance: Accepting client pushback as an assertion of power. Embracing uncertainty: Being comfortable with not having all the answers. Participating in decolonization conversations: Learning through community engagement and allyship. Stay in Touch with Curt, Katie, and the whole Therapy Reimagined #TherapyMovement:Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/therapyreimaginedModern Therapist’s Survival Guide Creative Credits:Voice Over by DW McCann https://www.facebook.com/McCannDW/Music by Crystal Grooms Mangano https://groomsymusic.com/ 

How Therapists Can Truly Help After a DisasterCurt and Katie chat about the impact of the recent Los Angeles wild fires on therapists, their clients, and communities. We explore the importance of self-assessment, responsible crisis response, and balancing personal care with providing support. From donating (and marketing) services ethically to understanding trauma timelines, Curt and Katie provide practical advice for therapists navigating community-wide disasters.Transcripts for this episode will be available at mtsgpodcast.com!In this podcast episode we talk through how therapists can help during and after crisesCurt and Katie live in Los Angeles, which was recently ravaged by wild fires. We decided it would be important to reflect on our experience and provide support to other therapists seeking ways they may be able to help their own communities.Self-Assessment and Prioritizing Personal Care during a Natural Disaster or Community Crisis Therapists are encouraged to assess their capacity to provide support, ensuring they do not overextend themselves during a crisis. Curt emphasizes radical acceptance and forgiveness for cancellations or temporary service disruptions caused by disasters. Katie highlights the importance of therapists taking care of themselves before offering services, noting the potential for long-term impacts on both providers and clients. How to Market Therapy during a crisis without feeling like an ambulance chaser Curt and Katie stress the importance of donating services ethically, avoiding lead generation tactics or branding during a crisis. They discuss reviewing scheduled marketing campaigns to ensure sensitivity to the current situation. Therapists are encouraged to work with established organizations (like the Red Cross) to maximize the impact of their efforts. Curt and Katie discuss the risks of using disasters to build personal brands and stress focusing solely on service and support. They suggest volunteering with experienced organizations to avoid complications and maximize resources for those in need. Recognizing Individual Needs and Trauma Timelines for disaster survivors Not all clients experience or process trauma in the same way; therapists must tailor their support to individual needs and stages of impact. Curt shares insights from his experience supporting clients after the Boston Marathon bombing, emphasizing the importance of addressing varying levels of trauma severity. Katie highlights the need for long-term care systems to address ongoing trauma responses. How Therapists can balance Caretaking and Personal Needs during a disaster Curt shares his experience of being overwhelmed by personal messages and work demands during the crisis. Katie emphasizes the importance of setting boundaries and giving oneself permission to focus on personal care. Therapists are reminded that they are part of the crisis too and should ensure they meet their own needs before taking on the caretaker role. Stay in Touch with Curt, Katie, and the whole Therapy Reimagined #TherapyMovement:Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/therapyreimaginedModern Therapist’s Survival Guide Creative Credits:Voice Over by DW McCann https://www.facebook.com/McCannDW/Music by Crystal Grooms Mangano https://groomsymusic.com/

Helping Parents Become What They Needed as a Child: An interview with Bryana Kappadakunnel, LMFTCurt and Katie chat with Bryana Kappakunnel, LMFT about conscious parenting, discussing how self-awareness, emotional regulation, and healing personal triggers can help parents foster healthier and more connected relationships with their children. With a background in infant and early childhood mental health and her upcoming book Parent Yourself First, Bryana offers valuable insights for therapists and parents alike.Transcripts for this episode will be available at mtsgpodcast.com!In this podcast episode, we talk with Bryana Kappadakunnel about Conscious ParentingWe invited friend of the show, Bryana Kappadakunnel, LMFT to talk about her work, including her new book, Parent Yourself First.  What is Conscious Parenting? Conscious parenting goes beyond positive parenting by prioritizing self-awareness, personal healing, and understanding the root causes of emotional triggers. Bryana explains how addressing parents’ unresolved issues can create a healthier environment for children, often alleviating behavioral challenges. She highlights the importance of building authentic connections with children and fostering emotional safety through open communication and modeling accountability. Common Pushback and Misconceptions for Conscious Parenting Bryana addresses resistance from parents who view traditional parenting as the norm or feel threatened by relational approaches. She clarifies that conscious parenting is not permissive but a balanced, authoritative style that combines high warmth, nurturance, structure, and boundaries. Bryana emphasizes the need to manage stress and prevent burnout by helping parents regulate their own emotions before addressing their children’s behavior. How to Help Parents Navigate Challenging Parenting Scenarios When parents feel disrespected by their children, Bryana advises focusing on their own emotional reactions and understanding the child’s behavior as a form of communication. She stresses the importance of setting consistent boundaries while staying attuned to the child’s perspective. Bryana shares her own practice of apologizing to her children when she makes mistakes, modeling accountability and respect in the parent-child relationship. How Conscious Parenting Helps Kids During the pandemic, Bryana shifted her focus to working with parents directly, leading to significant improvements in family dynamics in shorter timeframes. Her work underscores the importance of addressing systemic and relational patterns within families rather than focusing solely on child behavior. Bryana highlights the benefits of her approach, including better communication, a deeper sense of connection, and raising compassionate, empathetic, and confident children. Bryana’s Online Presence and Upcoming Book Bryana creates content tailored to the needs of parents and her clients, sharing bite-sized videos that inspire reflection and change. Bryana talks about her decisions on what to post as a licensed therapist with a big following on social media platforms She discusses her book, Parent Yourself First, which helps parents heal their own wounds to raise resilient and empathetic children. The book focuses on empowering parents to become the caregivers they wished they had, fostering healthier and more connected family systems. Stay in Touch with Curt, Katie, and the whole Therapy Reimagined #TherapyMovement:Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/therapyreimaginedModern Therapist’s Survival Guide Creative Credits:Voice Over by DW McCann https://www.facebook.com/McCannDW/Music by Crystal Grooms Mangano https://groomsymusic.com/

Identifying the Graduate Program for the Career You Want – Special Series Becoming a Therapist: An interview with Eden LathemIn this new series, Curt and Katie interview graduate students and will follow them on their journey to becoming a therapist. Our final interview is with Eden Lathem, a second-year Marriage and Family Therapy (MFT) student at Lipscomb University in Nashville, Tennessee. Eden shares her path from working in prison education and with individuals with disabilities to finding her passion for systemic thinking and family therapy. She candidly discusses the challenges of grad school, balancing internships, and navigating financial constraints while exploring her future career aspirations. She also talks through how she did due diligence to find the “right” graduate program.Transcripts for this episode will be available at mtsgpodcast.com!In this podcast episode, we meet Eden Lathem, an aspiring therapistWe continue our new series on becoming a therapist, with Eden Lathem, who is a first career professional who has done a lot of due diligence and strategic thinking to plan her trajectory as a therapist and professional.  Eden’s Background and Path to Therapy Eden shares how her experiences in prison education and working with individuals with disabilities shaped her desire to support families and underserved populations. Initially hesitant about becoming a therapist, Eden found her passion for MFT through her commitment to systemic thinking and helping others. She highlights the unique role of MFT in addressing the needs of families with disabled members, a demographic often overlooked. Grad School Expectations vs. Reality Eden discusses her experience in an in-person, cohort-style program that meets weekly. She was surprised by the program’s emphasis on self-awareness and the “self of the therapist” work, which has become a significant focus. While expecting more hands-on training, she found the program leaned heavily on didactic learning with limited opportunities for shadowing and hands-on therapy practice. Balancing Dual Internships and Financial Challenges Eden balances two internships: a paid position at a family therapy center and an unpaid internship, navigating the complexities of these experiences. She shares the financial struggles of grad school, reflecting on the challenges of unpaid internships and the economic realities of the helping professions. Eden highlights the need for strategic financial planning and managing responsibilities while pursuing a meaningful career. Advice for Prospective Therapy Students Eden encourages prospective students to thoroughly research programs by talking to professors and alumni. She stresses the importance of aligning program values with personal goals and considering the broader implications of the chosen education. Her advice emphasizes due diligence in selecting a program that supports future career aspirations. Stay in Touch with Curt, Katie, and the whole Therapy Reimagined #TherapyMovement:Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/therapyreimaginedModern Therapist’s Survival Guide Creative Credits:Voice Over by DW McCann https://www.facebook.com/McCannDW/Music by Crystal Grooms Mangano https://groomsymusic.com/

Becoming a Therapist as a First Generation Immigrant – Special Series Becoming a Therapist: An interview with Marvin VasquezIn this new series, Curt and Katie interview graduate students and will follow them on their journey to becoming a therapist. Our third interview is with Marvin Vasquez, a first-year Marriage and Family Therapy (MFT) student at California State University, Northridge (CSUN), which is an all in-person program. Marvin shares his journey into therapy, shaped by his immigrant background and personal struggles, as well as his passion for serving underserved communities. He opens up about the unexpected sense of community within his cohort, the financial challenges of grad school, and his concerns about the future of therapy in an increasingly technological world.Transcripts for this episode will be available at mtsgpodcast.com!In this podcast episode, we meet Marvin Vasquez, an aspiring therapistWe continue our new series on becoming a therapist, with Marvin Vasquez.  Marvin’s Background and Motivation for Becoming a Therapist Marvin reflects on his upbringing in a large immigrant family and how his experiences inspired his desire to help others. He explains how his personal struggles and a passion for underserved communities led him to pursue a career in therapy. His goal is to use his background and understanding to make therapy more accessible and impactful for marginalized groups. The First Semester of his MFT Program: Expectations vs. Reality Marvin discusses his expectations of a theory-heavy and clinical program, contrasting it with the surprising sense of community within his cohort. He highlights the supportive environment, where vulnerability and shared resilience among students foster personal and professional growth. Marvin appreciates the program’s emphasis on creating a safe space for learning and self-awareness. Community and Support in an In-Person Therapy Grad School Marvin contrasts his undergrad experience, which lacked connection, with his current program's close-knit and empathetic cohort. The program’s in-person setup has created a unique intensity and camaraderie among students, helping Marvin grow as both a person and a therapist. He emphasizes the importance of authenticity and vulnerability in building strong connections within the cohort. Navigating Family Dynamics and Self-Awareness Marvin shares how the program has deepened his empathy for his parents, particularly their struggles as first-generation immigrants. He reflects on how their survival strategies shaped his upbringing and his understanding of family dynamics. The program has helped Marvin foster greater authenticity and emotional awareness in both his personal and professional life. Balancing Academics, Work, and Relationships during his MFT Masters Program Marvin explains the challenges of balancing his academic workload, job responsibilities, and personal relationships. He discusses the financial stress of grad school, including student loans, and the sacrifices involved in pursuing his degree. Marvin acknowledges the importance of maintaining connections with friends and family to avoid burnout and maintain a healthy work-life balance. Financial Concerns and Career Aspirations as an MFT Marvin shares his worries about student debt and the economic realities of being a therapist. He expresses gratitude for his supportive employer, who provides flexibility to balance work and school. Marvin is exploring career options, including the importance of finding fieldwork opportunities that align with his values and schedule. Stay in Touch with Curt, Katie, and the whole Therapy Reimagined #TherapyMovement:Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/therapyreimaginedModern Therapist’s Survival Guide Creative Credits:Voice Over by DW McCann https://www.facebook.com/McCannDW/Music by Crystal Grooms Mangano https://groomsymusic.com/ 

Finding Alignment in a Second Career – Special Series Becoming a Therapist: An interview with Iris Wilson-FarleyIn this new series, Curt and Katie interview graduate students and will follow them on their journey to becoming a therapist. Our second interview is with Iris Wilson-Farley, a 54-year-old trans woman and graduate student pursuing her Master’s in Clinical Mental Health Counseling at the Chicago School of Professional Psychology. Iris shares her journey moving from a 32-year corporate career to becoming a therapist, her passion for working with the LGBTQ+ community, and her reflections on safety, technology, and additional training opportunities.Transcripts for this episode will be available at mtsgpodcast.com!In this podcast episode, we meet Iris Wilson-Farley, an aspiring therapistWe continue our new series on becoming a therapist, with Iris Wilson-Farley, who in her process of self-discovery realized that her career was misaligned. She is now pursuing a degree in counseling.The motivation to transition careers from HR to TherapyIris shares how her personal journey as a transgender woman and her positive counseling experiences inspired her to pursue a more meaningful career in therapy, focusing on giving back to the LGBTQ+ community, particularly older adults.The challenges and surprises in an online graduate program for therapistsIris discusses the challenges of adjusting to an asynchronous online program, balancing studies with her HR job, and the valuable multicultural and social justice emphasis in her curriculum.The perspective gained from entering therapy grad school as a second career clinicianShe highlights the wisdom, emotional intelligence, and lived experiences she brings as a second-career student, including her unique insights from being a client herself.Discussing safety concerns and multicultural awareness in the mental health professionIris reflects on addressing safety concerns as a trans therapist, particularly in the face of potential discrimination, and shares her commitment to finding a supportive and affirming work environment.How is AI and technology addressed in therapist graduate school?Drawing from her corporate experience, Iris explores the integration of technology and AI in therapy, advocating for its potential to enhance the field while emphasizing the need for ethical considerations.What additional training can be helpful when starting out as a therapist?Iris expresses interest in pursuing additional certifications in sex therapy and religious trauma to better serve the LGBTQ+ community and address gaps in her training.Stay in Touch with Curt, Katie, and the whole Therapy Reimagined #TherapyMovement:Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/therapyreimaginedModern Therapist’s Survival Guide Creative Credits:Voice Over by DW McCann https://www.facebook.com/McCannDW/Music by Crystal Grooms Mangano https://groomsymusic.com/

From Broadway to Grad School – Special Series Becoming a Therapist: An interview with Derek IsettiIn this new series, Curt and Katie interview graduate students and will follow them on their journey to becoming a therapist. Our first interview is with Derek Isetti, a 50-year-old graduate student in a two-year Master of Social Work program at California State University, Stanislaus. Derek shares his journey from careers in musical theater and speech-language pathology to pursuing a career in therapy. He reflects on the challenges, surprises, and personal factors influencing his decision to return to school, offering insights into navigating graduate education and the mental health profession.Transcripts for this episode will be available at mtsgpodcast.com!An Interview with Derek IsettiDerek Isetti, PhD, CCC-SLP earned his bachelor of arts in drama with an emphasis in musical theater from University of California, Irvine in 1996. After traveling the country in four national tours and performing in the musical Cabaret on Broadway, Derek returned to school and in 2008 he earned his master of science in Speech-Language Pathology from University of the Pacific. He later earned his doctor of philosophy in Speech and Hearing Sciences from University of Washington, studying voice disorders under the mentorship of Dr. Tanya Eadie. He joined the Pacific faculty in 2014 and is currently serving as Department Chair. In the Fall of 2023, he returned to school to pursue an MSW degree in hopes of becoming a psychotherapist. Derek is a member of the American Speech-Language-Hearing Association (ASHA) and the California Speech-Language-Hearing Association.In this podcast episode, we meet Derek Isetti, an aspiring therapistWe are starting a new series to follow graduate students on their journey to become a therapist. We start with Derek Isetti, a third career therapist who is working full-time while attending a MSW program in Northern CA. (summary provided in collaboration with Otter.ai and ChatGPT)The experience of transitioning careers to become a therapistDerek explains his shift from a performer and speech-language pathologist to therapy, motivated by a desire to create supportive, transformative spaces for others.What graduate school can be like for aspiring therapistsHe details his MSW program structure, designed for working professionals, which includes online courses, in-person classes once a month, and 1,000 hours of fieldwork by graduation.How therapy students can balance academic and personal lifeDerek shares how his personal circumstances, being single, working in academia, and attending a state university for affordability—helped shape his path.Some challenges and surprises on the path to becoming a therapistHe discusses the variability in program lengths (some social work programs are only 1 year, for example), California’s unique licensure process for social workers, and the tension between broad social work education and specialized psychotherapy training.How current events and technology are addressed in therapy grad schoolDerek highlights the integration of national events and teletherapy technology into his program and the importance of addressing these topics with clients and students.Stay in Touch with Curt, Katie, and the whole Therapy Reimagined #TherapyMovement:Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/therapyreimaginedModern Therapist’s Survival Guide Creative Credits:Voice Over by DW McCann https://www.facebook.com/McCannDW/Music by Crystal Grooms Mangano https://groomsymusic.com/

What if you hate private practice?Curt and Katie chat about the realities of private practice and why it isn’t the idyllic career path it’s often made out to be. We dig into reasons therapists may dislike private practice, like financial instability, isolation, lack of accountability, and ethical concerns. We also share ways therapists can navigate these hurdles and find fulfillment in their work. Transcripts for this episode will be available at mtsgpodcast.com!In this podcast episode we talk through what makes owning a private practice hardWe have seen both overly effusive (“living my best life”) and hopeless (“I will never be successful in private practice”) feedback about being in private practice. But what is it really like? AND if you don’t like private practice is that okay? We decided to dig into what makes being a private practitioner challenging.Doesn’t everyone LOVE private practice?·       There are a lot of reasons people choose private practice as their job·       Private practice is hard·       Private practice isn’t for everyoneFinancial Instability is unavoidable in private practice·       Private practice income can be unpredictable, often lacking benefits and paid time off·       Therapists may need outside financial support to mitigate these challenges·       Starting a private practice easily can rely on financial or able-bodied privilege·       Charging high fees and navigating ethical dilemmas can challenge therapists’ sense of fulfillment and values.Owning a Private Practice comes with Business Challenges·       With limited business training in grad school, therapists often struggle with marketing, setting up systems, and attracting clients.·       Therapists can overthink how they set up their practice, causing delays and inefficiencyMany Private Practice Clinicians experience isolation·       Private practice can feel lonely·       Networking, consultation groups, and in-person connections are essential for combating isolation.Private practice can be boring or monotonous·       If you are tightly niched or work only with the worried well, you may encounter little clinical challenge·       If you are only doing one to one work, you may desire more diversity of tasks to stay interested (like teaching, podcasting, etc.)If you own your own business, figure out how to deal with accountability issues·       Without structured oversight, therapists may face difficulties staying organized or motivated, which can lead to burnout·       Depending on who you talk with, you might convince yourself that no one is caught up on notes or paying their taxes on time – which isn’t accurate.What can therapists do to make private practice better?·       Network and nurture social and professional support·       Get systems set up (and make them as simple as possible) to streamline your work·       Think about diversifying what you do, to keep yourself engaged with the workStay in Touch with Curt, Katie, and the whole Therapy Reimagined #TherapyMovement:Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/therapyreimaginedModern Therapist’s Survival Guide Creative Credits:Voice Over by DW McCann https://www.facebook.com/McCannDW/Music by Crystal Grooms Mangano https://groomsymusic.com/

REPLAY - Outside Obsessions We’re still on vacation, but we wanted to share one of our favorite episodes with all of you. We start with a quick reflection on the episode and what we’ve learned since it originally aired. Today’s replay is of Episode 95: Outside Obsessions. In this episode we talk about how to handle the hobbies and goals in our personal lives that can be all consuming, especially if they come into the therapy room.You can see the original show notes and transcripts for episode 95 here: Outside Obsessions (https://bit.ly/mtsgpodcast95).

REPLAY - It’s Time to Think About Your Goals We’re on vacation, but we wanted to share one of our favorite episodes with all of you. We start with a quick reflection on the episode and what we’ve learned since it originally aired. Today’s replay is of Episode 18: It’s Time to Think About Your Goals. This is one of our first episodes and you can see what we were working on for 2018. This episode is timeless and timely. Happy New Year, all!You can see the original show notes and transcripts for episode 18 here: It’s Time to Think About Your Goals (https://bit.ly/mtsgpodcast18).