Where Do We Go From Here?

Are you single in church and wondering if you should ask someone out or waiting for someone to ask you out? The stakes feel high, but you're looking for connection. You're tired and wondering how and when this is going to happen. Dallas Pastor JD Rodgers asked the question on his Instagram account, Why aren't Christian guys asking Christian girls out? You had big thoughts about his assumptions, so we posed this question and others to two Christian men, Joel and Matt, and their insights into the experience of being a single man in a Christian community give us all something to think about. Turns out the guys in our pews are tired of the pressure and shame to do with dating too. Full show notes here Get episodes of the Jess & Devi Show for $3/month Talk to us on Instagram and Twitter

You're not the only one who expected to marry the first person they dated. Lots of evangelical teens raised in Purity Culture did. There was no talk on how to break up. No advice on what to do after you got dumped by someone you loved. We start to undo that today by talking about the personal side of breakups - what to do when a relationship ends, how can "metabolizing your trauma" help, and what does a future after a break up look like. Talk to us on Twitter and Instagram. Get episodes of The Jess & Devi Show for $3/month Full episode show notes Joy Beth Smith is the author of Party of One and winner of the Evangelical Press Association's Higher Goals in Christian Journalism Award. She's been published in the New York Times, Washington Post, Salt Lake Tribune, Christianity Today, and Christ and Pop Culture. After earning her MA degree in English Lit, JB had a brief stint as a teacher, but she now works in advertising and happily resides in the Chicagoland area. Follow her on Twitter @JBsTwoCents.

Do you despair when you look at the state of the world and the church today? Let our deep dive into the life of Josephine Butler give you courage. This extraordinary English woman was born into wealth and privilege in 1828 but spent decades of her life working to reform English society. She was a social worker, a government activist, and legal reformer. Josephine Butler campaigned for decades to give women in England a right to an education, work, vote. She worked to improve the rights of prostitutes and other women who were seen as "outcasts" in English society. As you re-imagine your life after purity culture, let Josephine Butler's life help you cast a new vision for what an effective faith can look like in our world today. Get the full audio of our conversation with Dr. Amanda Russell-Jones by joining The Jess & Devi Show community Continue the conversation with us on Instagram and Twitter. Full show notes Amanda Russell-Jones is a sessional lecturer at Regent College. She is a historian with an interest in how the Bible is interpreted and applied to issues of slavery, and women's relationship to the church both in different historical settings and in our contemporary world. Her recent PhD thesis from the University of Birmingham in the UK was entitled 'The Voice of the Outcast- Josephine Butler's Biblical Interpretation and Public Theology.'

"We are more than walking pelvises, but we need our pelvises to walk," says Sophia McLean. We talk about pelvic health, the connection between painful sex and purity culture, and the significance of a faith that is embodied. To hear our full conversation with Sophia, join us for $3/month on Patreon. Talk to us on Instagram and Twitter Full show notes here Sophia McLean is a pelvic health physiotherapist in London, Ontario. She has a physical therapy degree from Boston University in and a theology degree from Regent College. She works with clients one-on-one, teaching to small groups, writing educational material, and continuing to explore the intersection of Christian faith, embodiment, and pelvic health. To work with Sophia, you can contact her at sophiamclean.dpt@gmail.com.

The language we use to define the queer experience matters, and "same-sex attraction" does not cut it. Bridget Eileen Rivera goes into the history of the words "homosexual" and "same sex attraction" and explains why we need the LGBTQ+ community to use its words to define their experience. This is an expansive conversation about language and also about Bridget's experience as a lesbian Christian. To hear our full conversation, become a partner today. Join the Ladies Night Book Club to start discussing Talking Back to Purity Culture by Rachel Welcher on October 1. Talk to us on Instagram and Twitter Full show notes here Bridget Eileen Rivera is a writer, speaker, and educator completing her doctoral studies in sociology. She engages in public advocacy related to faith, gender, and sexuality, challenging the church to do better in its inclusion of LGBTQ people. Her first book, Heavy Burdens (Brazos Press, expected 2021), unpacks the legacy of LGBTQ discrimination in the church, helping Christians to better understand the experiences of LGBTQ people within Christianity and guiding readers to consider the tough questions necessary in charting a new path for the church. You can learn more about Bridget at bridgeteileenrivera.com or by following her on Twitter.

Knox McCoy reflects on male youth group culture and why we need to reconsider the evangelical approach to purity culture, and he shares how he has the conversation about masculinity and sex with his own children. We also talk about how the depiction of male and female sexuality has changed from Superbad in 2007 to Booksmart in 2019. Join the Ladies Night Book Club here Knox McCoy began podcasting in 2011 as a way to talk more about popular culture, and to his extreme surprise, he's still doing it via The Popcast with Knox and Jamie and The Bible Binge. He's the author of All Things Reconsidered: How Rethinking What We Know Helps Us Know What We Believe. Connect with Knox on Twitter and Instagram.

Trigger warning: Episode contains references to rape and sexual assault. The #MeToo movement isn't just about the Harvey Weinsteins of the world. It's also about Christians leaders in positions of power who wield that power for evil. Pastor, author, and speaker Ruth Everhart survived an assault and dealt with an abusive senior pastor in her early days as an associate pastor. After decades of ministry, she helps us navigate power, the Bible, and justice in a way that will bring you freedom and strength. Full show notes here And on The Jess & Devi Show, we talk about Tamar and Ammnon using The #MeToo Reckoning as our guide. Talk to us on Twitter & Instagram Ruth Everhart is an author, speaker, and pastor who has served Presbyterian (PCUSA) churches for more than twenty years. The author of three books, her most recent is The #MeToo Reckoning: Facing the Church's Complicity in Sexual Abuse and Misconduct, which weaves together contemporary stories and ancient scripture to call the church to lament, repent, and build a community of equality and justice. Connect with Ruth: Web Twitter Facebook Instagram

Get ready to learn today from Faitth Brooks and Kathryn Freeman about what it's like to navigate the world as a single, Black, Christian woman. We talk about purity culture, dating and dating apps, and evangelical perceptions of what makes a "good" woman. Use this episode as a tool to better understand your African American friends and as a tool as you navigate interracial relationships even if you don't live in the U.S. Full episode show notes here Get episodes of The Jess & Devi Show Join the conversation on Twitter & Instagram Melanated Faith is a Be the Bridge Collective podcast about faith, race, and culture hosted by Faitth Brooks and Kathryn Freeman. Faitth is a masters-level social worker engaging in community organizing and activism. Faitth works for Be the Bridge as the Director of Programs, she is passionate about anti-racism education. Website Twitter Facebook Instagram Kathryn is a seminary student, writer and advocate. She has ten years of experience in non-profit advocacy and enjoys teaching faith leaders how to engage the political process for the common good and God's glory. In her spare time, Kathryn writes about the intersection of faith and pop culture. Her work has appeared in Christianity Today, Christ and Pop Culture, The Baptist Standard, The Houston Chronicle, Think Christian, and Austin Woman Magazine. Website Twitter Facebook Instagram

Or is there even an after? K.J. Ramsey writes in her book This Too Shall Last, that "this is not a before and after story," because maybe the secret to grief is that we carry it with us as we flow through life. Maybe the secret is not a secret. It is our bodies, gifted, endowed by God with tools to help us move from alarm to calm and panicked to peaceful. We continue the conversation about ambiguous loss today and talk about how we can move through grief in a way that can form and transform us with therapist, writer, and theologian K.J. Ramsey. Our full conversation is available only to our partners, and you can join us on the inside here. Full episode show notes here Our special thanks as well to Dr. Pauline Boss and Lou Kurtz of the Great Lakes Mental Health Technology Transfer Center Network for letting us use the audio of Dr. Boss speaking. K.J. Ramsey (BA, Covenant College, MA, Denver Seminary) is a licensed professional counselor and writer. She is the author of This Too Shall Last: Finding Grace When Suffering Lingers , and her writing has been published in Christianity Today, RELEVANT, The Huffington Post, Fathom Magazine, Health Central, and more on the integration of theology, psychology, and spiritual formation. Follow her across social media at @kjramseywrites.

You know when you feel crazy and wonder, "Is it me?" Spoiler alert: IT'S NOT YOU. We invite you to examine these situations to find the unnamed grief that may lie beneath the crazy. Whether it is prolonged singleness, impending divorce, multiple childhood moves, or scheduling a wedding during a pandemic, we all experience losses that have no closure. We investigate Dr. Pauline Boss' groundbreaking research in ambiguous loss and discover what this has to do with us as we navigate our relationships and life during Covid-19. Full show notes Get episodes of The Jess & Devi Show Join the conversation on Twitter & Instagram