Quiet Messenger: Redefining leadership & messaging for introverts & sensitive souls

Your way is likely not loud. It may not be shouting on a loudspeaker at a protest or posting a polarizing opinion on social media. But that doesn't mean it isn't activism.  In case the word “activism” has you thinking this isn’t for you, let me remind you that as a Quiet Messenger, you’re an activist. You are speaking on behalf of a message that needs to get heard.  The reason you may discount yourself is that most of what we think of as activism is actually pretty extroverted.  Join season co-host Kat Frogosa and I in this conversation on Introverted Activism. Because you CAN quietly show up for your values…and the truth is that introverts can be just as effective and are JUST AS NEEDED as loud, outspoken folks.  *** Uncover your Messenger Archetype & more at AdriaSophia.com. Connect with Adria. Connect with Kat. Links from the episode: Speaking to What Matters Series Sarah Corbett’s TEDx “Activism needs introverts” Azalea Moen & Wilder Ones Studio

I'm back! And I'm not alone. (goes hand-in-hand with this episode) An idea that stuck in my head for months was bringing on a co-host for a season. I knew if I had a friend I was co-creating with, it would be easier to show up. I didn’t realize at the time that I was employing the technique of body doubling.  Enter Kat Frogosa, past client, friend, ADHD Money Coach and fabulous co-host for this season of Quiet Messenger. Because who says we need to follow the standard business formula that says we each have to build our own things? Kat and I talk about… Feeding the desire for community, in an introverted way The power of body doubling to accomplish tasks you’ve been procrastinating on for MONTHS Permission to try differently, not harder (the anthem for Quiet Messengers & neurodivergent folks that don’t think the way the dominant paradigm does) What it means to not hold your business or work alone Uncover your Messenger Archetype & more at AdriaSophia.com. Links from the episode: Kat’s Website and Instagram Adria’s Instagram Ashley Looker’s Empowered Sisterhood Sonia Choquette https://soniachoquette.net/

Do you ever feel like there’s a certain way you need to sound to be heard online? An empath with a rebellious streak, Quiet Messenger Kat Frogosa is a natural-born nurturer with major resistance when being told to do things a certain way.  If it doesn’t feel good deep down in her bones, she’s not doing it. She had seen so many women — especially burned out, overwhelmed empaths — cringe when they heard the word “finances,” and knew that there must be a better way. So she turned her background in finance into work as a Transformational Money Coach. But even though Kat was getting engagement on social media, her messaging didn’t feel like it truly reflected her. She had come away from past copywriting trainings with catchy copy but confused and unsure what her voice was, feeling scared to be herself — and like she needed to put on a persona and brush up on pop culture to sound “cooler.” Even when she knew what she wanted to say, she would stare at a google doc for 45 minutes, paralyzed to get it right before putting it out there.  She was holding herself back, not actively seeking clients.  Through joining a cohort of other Quiet Messengers, she began to see her sensitivity and empathic nature as a superpower rather than a weakness. She realized she could impact the lives of other women by teaching them the tools she’d learned to help herself.  She realized that she could be a quiet person AND a disruptor…if she gave herself permission to just be herself.  (And let out the bubbly, lots-to-say, magnetic voice of her inner Expressive Messenger Archetype!)  Her confidence in herself as a quiet leader grew, and she found herself no longer holding back. She started showing up more on Instagram, being more consistent with her newsletter, and trying new strategies — like creating a quiz and a meditation — that she would never have tried if she wasn’t feeling so solid in her messaging (and her voice).  This led to discovery calls, being invited to interviews, and new clients…until she was finally ready to go all in with pitching to be on podcasts and revving up her referral system! Listen in to hear Kat’s story. I bet you’ll relate to a lot! Kat and I talk about: The exact messaging shifts that made her people really “get” it Why The Disruptor and The Empath are not opposites, and how they can coexist in you The difference between putting on a persona and bringing forward the quiet or rebellious part of yourself that has been suppressed How being rebellious and being in alignment are kinda the same thing Deeper support from me: What’s your Messenger Archetype? Take the quiz. It’s final enrollment for the winter cohort of the Messenger Mastermind! It’s an intimate circle of sensitive, introverted women leaders who like cozy spaces for connection, growth and processing and who want to feel solid, confident & consistent in their messaging so they can grow a movement that matters ~ both to the world and to their business’ bottom line. Kat’s Links Kat’s Instagram @frogosaselitesolutions Kat’s Website Frogosaselitesolutions.com “Letting Go of Money Regret” Meditation

Sarah Hennessey is a Sustainability & Wellness Coach supporting self-identified female misfits who are looking for a sustainable and alternative twist on living a truly healthy life. As someone who was too shy to speak in school growing up, Sarah spent most of her life definitely not seeing herself as a Messenger. When she started her business as an adult, she felt more comfortable as a virtual assistant behind the scenes of others’ businesses.  Then she felt the pull to step out as a leader and share what she had to say.  She had a background working with kids on the spectrum of autism and a degree in Psychology with a concentration in child development and disability. But the pressure of visibility made her feel the need to hide her own neurodiversity and other differences that she thought would stop clients from hiring her. The dichotomy of online marketing is the push to differentiate yourself while simultaneously holding a fear of being seen as different.  Through joining a supportive group of other Quiet Messengers that didn’t judge her, she realized that what she had to say — and who she was — was of value to people.  She didn’t see any wellness coaches with ADHD, so she made herself her own role model – which led to her first paid coaching client. She created a brilliant niche and discovered her ideal client on a much deeper level and so was finally able to clearly and compellingly connect the threads of her messaging and communicate what she had to say.  Now she’s talking about so many things she had never talked about in public before – like this episode where she speaks publicly about her neurodiversity for the first time.  She’s learned that taking a stand is not about being super aggressive; it can just be confidently saying something meaningful.  Listen in. Sarah and I talk about: Why sharing her own personal stories – like being the child of teenage parents – creates connection points with potential clients The exciting and terrifying transition from behind-the-scenes Virtual Assistant to using her voice as a Messenger Her assumption that being an expert was about sharing facts, when in reality the posts with the most engagement and connection are the personal posts of her life and stories Where templates are helpful and where to yield to the power of being in relationship  A call for embracing neurodiversity — and why the world is a better place when we have all types of brains, perspectives, and folks who view the world in different ways How she’s reclaiming and owning the word “misfit”  Deeper support from me: What’s your Messenger Archetype? Take the quiz. It’s final enrollment for the winter cohort of the Messenger Mastermind! It’s an intimate circle of sensitive, introverted women leaders who like cozy spaces for connection, growth and processing and who want to feel solid, confident & consistent in their messaging so they can grow a movement that matters ~ both to the world and to their business’ bottom line.  Sarah’s Links Sarah’s Instagram Sarah’s Facebook Group: #BestSelf Women’s Club

Popping in with a quick note on my Messenger Mastermind – what it’s all about, why I do it, how it supports Quiet Messengers – since we’re in final enrollment for the January cohort! The Messenger Mastermind is an intimate circle of sensitive, introverted women leaders who like cozy spaces for connection, growth and processing and who want to feel solid, confident & consistent in their messaging so they can grow a movement that matters ~ both to the world and to their business’ bottom line.

This episode might seem to contradict the last. I said message clarity isn’t everything, and that what we really need is an ongoing messaging practice.  That’s still true.  But also, message clarity is the foundation that messaging practice is built on.  That’s why I structure my Masterminds for Quiet Messengers with core content to keep generating new layers of message clarity + coaching calls to build your messaging practice on that clarity.  So in this episode, we’ll focus on four keys to bring forward message clarity so you can be heard by the people you’re here to help…without needing to shout.  And my advice isn’t as “do this” or cookie cutter as you’d think.  It’s not about following a formula for conversion to “get clients.” It’s about being a Messenger.  Which, yes, leads to clients, but through genuine connection and resonance with your people. Listen in. Deeper support from me: Join us in the upcoming free Message Clarity Challenge here. We start November 15th!  What’s your Messenger Archetype? Take the quiz. The next cohort of the Messenger Mastermind is enrolling! It’s an intimate circle of sensitive, introverted women leaders who like cozy spaces for connection, growth and processing and who want to feel solid, confident & consistent in their messaging so they can grow a movement that matters ~ both to the world and to their business’ bottom line. Warmth, Adria

Ever feel like you keep getting *this* close with your messaging and then…Ugh, actually never mind, I don’t know if this is right.  Or do you clarify your messaging and then lose touch with it and forget…How do I talk about this again? Is this really what people want?  Two steps forward, one step back.  Two steps forward, one step back.  That’s because messaging clarity isn’t a replacement for messaging practice. Often people will reach out to say they just need a single session with me. That they just need that one aha moment that will finally bring them clarity on their message.  We think it’ll be this big BOOM moment where we’ve got clarity and then we’re done.  ​​Well, what we actually need is almost always much deeper than we think. (Same as is likely true for your clients and what they need.)  Being a Messenger doesn’t mean you clarify your messaging once and you’ll FOREVER onward feel confident about it and know how to talk about it.  It means you clarify your messaging and then continue to be in the PRACTICE of working with it.  There are a lot of assumptions and misunderstandings that get made when it comes to your message and messaging. I don’t want THIS one to hold you back from being the leader you’re here to be. Listen in. Deeper support from me: What’s your Messenger Archetype? Take the quiz. Grab your free Message Clarity Kit.  Earlybird Enrollment is here! The Messenger Mastermind is an intimate circle of women leaders who like cozy spaces for connection, growth and processing and who want to feel solid, confident & consistent in their messaging so they can grow a movement that matters ~ both to the world and to their business’ bottom line. Warmth, Adria

A couple of years back, when the book Disrupt-Her by Miki Agrawal (powerhouse cofounder of THINX and Tushy, two startups that disrupted the taboo categories of periods and toilets) came out, I read it, thinking:  “This wasn’t written for me. I’m not bold or daring or loud. I’m not a disruptor. If anything, my natural tendency is to keep the peace.”  Well, through a series of recent events – including claiming the Quiet Messenger title, I’ve changed my mind. (More on that in today’s episode.) Because a clear message is inherently disruptive.  This has become more and more true for me this round of my Messenger Mastermind as I see these sensitive souls really showing up for their people and stepping into speaking out in ways that stretch them but feel so so important. The reason you and I think we’re not disruptors is because, like in the leadership and business worlds, that term has an inherent bias that excludes traits like shy, introverted, quiet, and sensitive.  So we need to expand the definition to include us.  In ep 191 of Quiet Messenger, I break down my 5 Tenets for Quiet Disruption to help guide you to step into the disruptor that you ALREADY are, no need to be more bold or daring or loud.  Listen in. Deeper support from me: What’s your Messenger Archetype? Take the quiz. Grab your free Message Clarity Kit.  The Messenger Mastermind is an intimate circle of women leaders who like cozy spaces for connection, growth and processing and who want to feel solid, confident & consistent in their messaging so they can grow a movement that matters ~ both to the world and to their business’ bottom line. Links from the Episode: Quiet Messenger #186 – Being “On Brand” Doesn’t Work for Quiet Leaders #167 – Which Sensitive Soul Messenger Archetype Are You? #180 – Tap into the Message that Moves You #181- Help Your People Say, “Hey, that’s me”  #183 – Messaging That Lovingly Calls in Your People #187 – Sensitive Biz Owners are Actually Born Rule Breakers Warmth, Adria

Have you felt any friction, resistance, or misalignment with social media lately? I know I have, for a few years now.  So many of us are questioning: I can’t keep up. I wish I could do more. Is there something wrong with me? Look at her successful life – will I ever get there? Does anyone even care what I have to say? I want to close my account – but don’t I need it to market my business? Is posting the highlights of my life doing harm? Am I part of the problem? We’re in a collective inquiry. I see it in groups I’m in, with friends, from clients. Especially those of us who are more sensitive.  When we see social media as an important biz and leadership tool, unhooking from it can feel extra sticky.  At the same time, it’s also true that over the past year (and for many years for those with disabilities) social media has allowed many to foster connection through isolation. It’s literally been a lifeline. It’s complex. There are no absolutes, no 100% “good” or “bad.”   In Quiet Messenger ep 190, we navigate this complexity together – not from a space of having all the answers but from a space of being able to be IN the questions. I want you to be equipped to make intentional choices that honor your capacity (a nod to last week’s episode) and how you show up best.  Listen in. I talk about: How the algorithm works against sensitive, introverted folks (and what that means for you) My evolving relationship with Instagram and Facebook (and what still makes me feel self-conscious) Why using someone else’s “tried and true” 10-step formula is STILL an experiment Ways to market more intimately, beyond social media, that have felt best for me for over the last few years An invitation to be creative, make your own rules, and experiment Deeper support from me: What’s your Messenger Archetype? Take the quiz. Grab your free Message Clarity Kit.  The Messenger Mastermind is an intimate circle of women leaders who like cozy spaces for connection, growth and processing and who want to feel solid, confident & consistent in their messaging so they can grow a movement that matters ~ both to the world and to their business’ bottom line. Links from the Episode: Social Media, Disability and the Cult of Witness – Lara Veleda Vesta Warmth, Adria

As a sensitive leader, I can lead a 90-minute coaching call for my Messenger Mastermind and be energetically DONE.  Even though it was a fantastic, connected session that brought tears and aha moments to my clients and enlivened, inspired, and fulfilled me.  I’m intense. Focused. In that hour and a half, I was fully present and gave my 100%. I left nothing on the table.  And after, I need to recharge.  In the past, I felt shame for that, for seemingly having a “lower” capacity than other leaders. If you’re thinking, “me too,” it’s time for a reframe.  It’s not that you don’t have the capacity. It’s that your capacity goes deep rather than wide.  And you know what happens if you don’t honor your deep capacity, if you pretend you also have the capacity to go wide and just push through?  You get stuck circling the burnout / recovery loop. (Trust me, I know.) The good news is that, if your capacity runs deep, you don’t also need to force yourself to go wide.  You don’t have to deplete yourself by engaging with thousands of followers for hours every day or be “popular” to make money as a coach or to make an impact in people’s lives.  You just need to reach the right people. And be able to communicate the core of your work and mission so your messaging calls in those people.  So then, how do you begin to go about honoring your true capacity? That’s what Episode 189 is all about.  Listen in. I talk about: How to determine your client load sweet spot & what to charge to get out of the burnout cycle 4 key questions to ask to go from measuring yourself against mainstream biz advice (which keeps you depleted) to honoring your true capacity The necessary daily habit that most of us highly sensitive folks aren’t making time for My personal practices over the past decade that have built a business that works for me as a sensitive leader Deeper support from me: What’s your Messenger Archetype? Take the quiz. Grab your free Message Clarity Kit.  The Quiet Messenger Mastermind is an intimate circle of women leaders and deep feelers who like cozy spaces for connection, growth and processing and who want to feel solid, confident & consistent in their messaging to grow a movement that matters ~ both to the world and to their business’ bottom line. Links: Naomi Osaka: ‘It’s O.K. Not to be O.K.’ Warmth, Adria