Becoming Wilkinson

WILKINSON
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Aug 10, 2025 • 46min

John "Murf" on Coming Out, Drag Culture, Life Lessons, Relationships, AIDS, Acting in NYC and LA's Casting Couches. Oh My!

CHAPTERS00:00Introduction to Murph and the Gay Men's Collective02:43Murph's Early Life and Self-Discovery05:08Coming Out and Understanding Identity07:50First Experiences and Relationships10:07Exploring Sexuality and Community12:34Uber Stories and Encounters15:00Bachelorette Parties and Observations17:29Reflections on Safe Spaces and Community Dynamics22:33Observations on Social Dynamics in Gay Bars23:43Navigating the New York City Gay Scene27:09The Transition from Acting to Retail Sales32:35Skills Transfer: From Performance to Sales Training34:43Future Aspirations and Retirement Plans43:22Life Lessons and Personal InsightsSUMMARYIn this engaging conversation, Murph shares his journey from his early life in Ireland to his experiences in the LGBTQ community, including coming out, navigating the AIDS epidemic, and his life in New York City. He discusses his time in the drag scene, memorable Uber stories, and the lessons he's learned throughout his life. The conversation highlights the importance of self-acceptance, the challenges faced by the LGBTQ community, and the joy of travel and personal connections.TAKEAWAYSMurph's early experiences shaped his understanding of his identity.Coming out can be a complex journey influenced by societal perceptions.The AIDS epidemic had a profound impact on the LGBTQ community during the 80s and 90s.Personal relationships can be both innocent and transformative during adolescence.Life in New York City offered Murph a vibrant LGBTQ culture and opportunities.Memorable encounters while driving Uber reveal the diversity of experiences in Palm Springs.Traveling can lead to self-discovery and deeper connections with others.Lessons learned include the importance of taking chances and being true to oneself.Respect is more important than being liked in personal relationships.Finding joy in the small moments can reset one's perspective.BIOJohn "Murf" is Irish-born, New York-based, and living proof that wanderlust, wit, and a well-curated playlist can take you far.He’s as happy glamping in the woods as he is lounging on a beach — ideally after museum-hopping and a three-course lunch. A Modigliani fan, Paris devotee, and certified foodie, he curates his life like his music: part 70s disco, part 90s nostalgia, all vibes.Gay, glam, and occasionally grounded, John believes in good shoes, great stories, and never saying no to dessert — or a flight to somewhere fabulous.To contact Wilkinson:  BecomingWilkinson@gmail.com
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Aug 6, 2025 • 19min

(Part 2) Matt Pascua: The Art of Indie Filmmaking & co-starring in Stuart Wade's 'Say Yes' and 'Baby Steps' + Some Observations as an Artist in NYC

CHAPTERS00:00Navigating Technical Glitches and Film Discussions02:39Exploring Nuanced Acting in 'Say Yes' and 'Baby Steps'05:24The Collaborative Spirit of Indie Films08:08Intimacy and Comfort in Filming10:51Future Projects and Industry Insights13:20Reflections on Humanity and Personal GrowthSUMMARYIn this engaging conversation, Matt Pascua reflects on his experiences in the film industry, discussing his roles in 'Say Yes' and 'Baby Steps', the creative process behind 'Scrambled', and the importance of intimacy coordination in film. He shares insights on navigating current events, personal growth, and the significance of kindness in everyday life. The discussion highlights the collaborative nature of indie projects and the emotional impact of storytelling.TAKEAWAYSThe importance of emotional connection in acting.Indie projects foster a family-like atmosphere.Intimacy coordinators enhance safety in film production.The journey of filmmaking is as important as the final product.Kindness can significantly impact someone's day.Navigating the film industry requires adaptability and openness.Creative collaboration leads to better storytelling.Recognizing personal growth is essential for happiness.Current events can challenge faith in humanity.Art can reflect societal issues and provoke thought.BIOMATT PASCUA is an actor based in New York City. After studying at the Neighborhood Playhouse, he began working in commercials and on stage, including an earlier, regional production of Matthew Spangler's "The Kite Runner," an adaptation of Khaled Hosseini's best-selling novel of the same name. His television work includes appearances on "Grey's Anatomy," "Castle," "Rosewood," "Insecure," "Dynasty," "Fantasy Island," "Mayor of Kingstown," and "FBI: Most Wanted." Through 2024, Matt recurred as Ben Perez on "Walker," The CW's family drama-reboot of "Walker, Texas Ranger." On film, he can be seen in Jean-Marc Vallée's "Wild" and in Stewart Wade's "Say Yes" and "Baby Steps," amongst several other independent releases. In 2019, two projects he headlined, Lise Johnson's "Other Loving" and Anthony Meindl's "Where We Go From Here," screened at the Cannes Film Festival. Matt is also an alum of the ABC Discovers Talent Showcase, which takes pride in Chadwick Boseman, Lupita Nyong’o, and Gina Rodriguez, among many others, as some of its previously selected artists.Matt's IG/:  https://www.instagram.com/pattmascua/Photo credit:  Kristi Griffith Photography
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Aug 3, 2025 • 30min

(Part 1) Matt Pascua: Navigating the Emotional Acting Landscape, his work in Independent Film and Life in NYC

THIS IS PART ONE.  PART TWO WILL BE RELEASED IN A FEW DAYS.:00Introduction and Background02:47Journey into Acting05:37Navigating the Acting Industry08:28Life in New York vs. LA11:25Travel and Personal Life14:07Finding Love and Relationships16:54Coming Out and Identity19:39Family Dynamics and Support20:33Exploring Sexuality and Identity23:21The Making of 'Say Yes'27:53Character Reflections and Personal ConnectionsSUMMARYIn this conversation, Matt Pascua shares his journey from a Midwest upbringing to becoming an actor in New York City. He discusses the challenges and joys of navigating the acting world, the competitive nature of LA and New York, and his experiences with love and identity. Matt reflects on his coming out journey, the support from his family, and how he relates to his character in the independent film 'Say Yes.' The conversation highlights themes of self-discovery, emotional honesty, and the importance of community.TAKEAWAYSMatt Pascua grew up outside of Chicago and didn't pursue acting until later in life.He found his passion for acting while studying at Ithaca College.Matt emphasizes the importance of emotional honesty in acting.He believes there is no correct trajectory in an acting career.Self-assessment is crucial for artists to ensure they find joy in their work.Matt's journey of coming out was supported by his younger brother, who is also gay.He values the growth and learning that comes with family dynamics.Matt identified as bisexual and acknowledged his late exploration of this part of his identity. He now simply identifies as Queer.He shares a positive experience of finding love through Grindr during the pandemic.Matt relates deeply to his character Caden in 'Say Yes,' infusing personal experiences into his performance.BIOMATT PASCUA is an actor based in New York City. After studying at the Neighborhood Playhouse, he began working in commercials and on stage, including an earlier, regional production of Matthew Spangler's "The Kite Runner," an adaptation of Khaled Hosseini's best-selling novel of the same name. His television work includes appearances on "Grey's Anatomy," "Castle," "Rosewood," "Insecure," "Dynasty," "Fantasy Island," "Mayor of Kingstown," and "FBI: Most Wanted." Through 2024, Matt recurred as Ben Perez on "Walker," The CW's family drama-reboot of "Walker, Texas Ranger." On film, he can be seen in Jean-Marc Vallée's "Wild" and in Stewart Wade's "Say Yes" and "Baby Steps," amongst several other independent releases. In 2019, two projects he headlined, Lise Johnson's "Other Loving" and Anthony Meindl's "Where We Go From Here," screened at the Cannes Film Festival. Matt is also an alum of the ABC Discovers Talent Showcase, which takes pride in Chadwick Boseman, Lupita Nyong’o, and Gina Rodriguez, among many others, as some of its previously selected artists.Matt's IG/:  https://www.instagram.com/pattmascua/Contact Wilkinson: BecomingWilkinson@gmail.com
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Jul 27, 2025 • 42min

Healing the Past: Cancer, Breathwork and Family Dynamics

CHAPTERS:00:00Introduction to Personal Growth Journey09:25Experiences at Awaken Your Highest Self Conference18:39Breathwork and Emotional Healing27:29Ancestral Connections and Healing36:35Transformative Breathwork and Financial InsightsDESCRIPTION:In this conversation, Wilkinson shares his personal journey of self-discovery and healing through breathwork and spiritual practices. He reflects on his experiences at a mens retreat and also at a recent  "Awaken Your Higher Self" conference, discussing the emotional breakthroughs he encountered, particularly related to his family dynamics and his recent cancer diagnosis. The conversation emphasizes the importance of openness to experiences, the healing power of breathwork, and the ongoing journey of personal growth and understanding.TAKEAWAYSWilkinson emphasizes the importance of being open to experiences.Breathwork can trigger profound emotional releases and memories.He recalls a significant breakthrough during a breathwork session.Family dynamics play a crucial role in personal healing.The concept of allowing others to have their own journey is vital.Wilkinson's cancer diagnosis has prompted deep introspection.He experienced a sense of connection with his ancestors during breathwork.The healing process involves confronting past traumas and shame.Wilkinson's journey reflects a shift towards love and kindness.He remains hopeful about his health and the lessons it brings.Contact Wilkinson at BecomingWilkinson@gmail.com
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Jul 10, 2025 • 37min

This podcaster explains his medical-cancer journey.

Chapters:00:00Introduction to My Medical Journey02:58The Car Accident and Its Aftermath05:48Life Changes and New Beginnings08:46Couchsurfing and Unexpected Insights12:05Prostate Cancer Diagnosis and Treatment Decisions17:46Navigating Medical Challenges and Surgeries23:48Reflections on Health and Healing30:04Recent Developments and Future OutlookSummary:In this podcast, the host shares a deeply personal narrative about his medical journey, starting from a car accident in 1988 that led to chronic pain and a series of health challenges, including a life-threatening blood clot and a prostate cancer diagnosis. He reflects on significant life changes, including coming out as gay, hosting Couchsurfers, and navigating the complexities of the medical system. The conversation also touches on personal growth, resilience, and the importance of self-advocacy in healthcare. The host concludes with insights gained from a recent road trip and a commitment to continue sharing his journey.Takeaways:The importance of self-advocacy in healthcare.Life can change dramatically due to unexpected events.Couchsurfing provided valuable insights into human connection.Prostate cancer can be slow-growing, requiring careful monitoring.Navigating the medical system can be challenging and frustrating.Personal growth often comes from facing adversity.The mind-body connection plays a crucial role in healing.Sharing personal stories can foster community and support.Travel can be a powerful tool for self-discovery.Maintaining a positive outlook is essential during health challenges.Contact Wilkinson @BecomingWilkinson@gmail.comNote: This is story of my journey, from my perspective.  It's not medical advice.  For that, you need to contact your own medical professional.
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Jun 22, 2025 • 44min

In this conversation, Laura Stearns shares her journey as an actor, author, and advocate for trauma survivors. She discusses her experiences with childhood trauma, the impact of her time in the theater community, and her healing process.

Chapters00:00Introduction to Laura Stearns01:42Exploring Trauma and Healing04:03The Impact of Childhood Experiences06:09The Role of Institutions in Abuse08:28Personal Stories of Assault11:04The Aftermath of Trauma12:59Marriage and Relationships Post-Trauma15:06Legislative Changes and Advocacy17:43Public Disclosure and Its Consequences20:38Understanding Trauma in the Arts22:08The Healing Journey and Self-Discovery26:36Navigating Identity and Relationships30:48The Impact of Trauma on Society32:24Current Projects and Future Aspirations35:49Living Authentically and Trusting Your GutSummaryIn this conversation, Laura Stearns shares her journey as an actor, author, and advocate for trauma survivors. She discusses her experiences with childhood trauma, the impact of her time in the theater community, and her healing process. Laura emphasizes the importance of understanding trauma, the implications of the Child Victims Act, and the role of art in healing. She also shares insights from her memoir and her current projects, highlighting the need for community and support for survivors.TakeawaysLaura's journey through trauma began in childhood.The theater community can harbor hidden dangers.Understanding false core beliefs is crucial for healing.The Child Victims Act allows survivors to seek justice.Art can be a powerful tool for healing and expression.Community support is vital for trauma survivors.Litigation can be a re-traumatizing experience.Self-discovery is a key part of the healing process.Sharing stories helps build connections and understanding.Trusting one's gut is essential for personal growth.Laura Stearns' BioLaura studied theater in Minneapolis, Minnesota, and has been working in professional theater since the age of thirteen. As a theater maker in the Twin Cities, which included twelve years on staff at the world-renowned Guthrie Theater, Laura has worked with some of the most talented artists from around the world, both on and off stage. Laura is an accomplished actor and director with a diverse skill set that has given her the opportunity to work in almost every department of theater production as a manager, technician, and designer. Now living in Southern California, she is the winner of the 2024 Desert Theatre League Award for Best Direction of The Woman in the Mirror. She also designed and fabricated the puppets for Avenue Q at Revolution Stage Company. Palm Springs audiences will recognize Laura from her performances this past season as Norma Baxter in Perfect Arrangement at The Bent, and Dr. Charlotte in Falsettos at Dezart Performs. She is also the author of Shattered: Exposing the Open Secret of the Children’s Theatre Scandal and Daring to Heal: Growing Beyond Trauma Through Awareness, Acceptance, and Action, co-author of The Minnesota Theater Standards for Safety and Accountability and co-founder of the Minnesota Theater Accountability Coalition. Her testimony at the state legislature supported the removal of the criminal Statute of Limitations for rape victims in the state of Minnesota. As a proud member of Actors Equity Association and an associate with the Stage Directors and Choreographers Society, Laura is a fierce advocate for safe spaces in theater production and education. Learn more about Laura at http://www.laurastearns.comLAURA STEARNSshe/her/hersArtist ~ Advocate ~ ConsultantActor- SAG/AFTRA ~ AEADirector- Associate, Stage Directors and Choreographers SocietyIntimacy Direction - IDC Consent Forward Artist CertifiedWords and Actions Matter Contact Wilkinson: www.BecomingWilkinson@gmail.com
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Jun 14, 2025 • 3min

A short story written in reflection of Trump's military parade & the simultaneous No Kings protests.

"Once upon a time on June 14, 2025".And one day in June, a broken, poor little boy stole money from his uncle and threw himself a big party and a parade. He lined up all his toy tanks and his toy soldiers. He pretended to be important as he stood behind his little glass-enclosed podium and watched as the festivities unfolded before him. He was surrounded by (those whom he had convinced himself were) his friends. But they all knew the truth. They weren't real friends. He had bought them with favors and gifts. Their friendships were nothing but transactions on paper with loyalty written in water. He was hidden behind the podium, but there were some who were sitting close to him who could see the truth. They remained silent as they observed that his small feet could not come close to filling the shoes he was wearing. His body, though chubby for his age, was overwhelmed by the oversized suit he was trying to wear.  Simultaneously, in all the villages near and far, the true warriors gathered. They knew their secret power. They gathered in love, realized that they were united in brotherhood and they simply stood and let their light shine for all to see. The light from each village shot in beams overhead. The beams joined forces above, becoming a bright, white cosmic mass - shining into the darkness for the entire world to see.  The light began to affect the clouds overhead. The water began to pour out of the clouds. As the rain hit the people gathered in the villages, they began to smile and laugh and sing and dance. They were experiencing the joy of the real party.But as the rain hit the small boy’s parade, it began to wash away and disintegrate his small toys as if they were made of paper. The street before him became a river.  The water overwhelmed the boy’s podium, turning it over and knocking him to the ground. He slipped out of his oversized suit. His big-boy shoes washed away.  Various folks who had come to observe his party and parade, (and his so-called friends) all dashed for cover, leaving him utterly alone.  He stood up, with nothing left accept the cameras that he had placed to show off his pretend party to the world.  But the world finally saw the truth: Everyone looked down with pity and disgust at the broken, naked, friendless little poor boy with no clothes.© Wilkinson/2025
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Jun 8, 2025 • 25min

Why are Blake Allwood's MALE TO MALE ROMANCE NOVELS so popular with so many FEMALE readers?

Chapters00:00Introduction and Background01:29Coming Out Journey03:50First Experiences and Relationships07:55Finding Love and Long-Term Partnership11:46Becoming an Author14:43Writing Themes and Audience18:28Future Projects and Aspirations21:19SummaryIn this conversation, Blake Allwood shares his journey of self-discovery, from his coming out experience in a conservative environment to becoming a successful author. He discusses the challenges he faced growing up in a small town, his exploration of sexuality, and the impact of his relationships on his life. Blake also delves into his writing career, revealing how he transitioned from being terrified of writing to publishing numerous books, primarily focused on gay romance. He reflects on the importance of authenticity and the lessons learned.Takeaways*Blake's coming out story was influenced by his upbringing in a conservative environment.*He didn't fully understand his sexuality until he was in college.*Therapy played a crucial role in Blake's self-discovery.*Blake's first sexual experience was with a man he met at a bar.*He identifies as demisexual, preferring emotional connections over casual encounters.*Blake has been with his husband for over 30 years, emphasizing the importance of finding the right partner.*His writing journey began as a way to help a troubled foster son.*Blake has published around 35 books, mostly focused on gay romance.*He enjoys writing stories that offer hope and happy endings.*Blake's audience primarily consists of straight women who enjoy gay romance.BioBlake Allwood was born in Tennessee, then moved to Missouri after earning a degree in Early Childhood Education from Graceland College in Lamoni, Iowa. He met his husband Shaun in 1995 and they officially married in 2015, once gay marriage was legalized; although they still consider Valentines Day 1995 as their true “anniversary date”. Twenty-two years later (2017), after fostering 12 children together, he and his husband sold their home, purchased an RV and began traveling the country with their two dogs. Most of Blake’s stories are inspired by the places they have visited in their ongoing travels. His first book, Aiden Inspired, was released in 2019 and he has now written over 30 books. On June 1st, Blake released his latest book, Cleats and Pumps, which is an NFL football player to drag queen star novel. Blake also writes under the pen name of Adam J. Ridley for his urban fantasy fans looking for stories revolving around gay characters. His first series is The Witch Brothers Saga, starting with Emerald Earth.  He will release two new books under Adam J. Ridley this fall.Contact Info:Email: Blake@blakeallwood.comWebsite: blakeallwood.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/blake.allwood.5Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/blakeallwood9/BlueSky: https://bsky.app/profile/authorblakeallwood.bsky.socialTo contact Wilkinson:  BecomingWilkinson@gmail.com
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Jun 1, 2025 • 41min

Brad Ward: From Trauma to Triumph to Joy via Mindfulness, Presence and Authenticity!

Chapters00:00Introduction and Background02:39Coming Out Journey04:44Navigating Family Dynamics06:59Spiritual Awakening and Identity09:32Career Transitions and Purpose14:33Coaching and Trauma Recovery19:19Future Aspirations and Reflections21:14Navigating Nonprofit Challenges23:00Understanding Trauma and Its Impact25:45The Intersection of Religion and Identity27:52Exploring the Nature of Joy33:02The Role of Mindfulness in Healing39:42Life Lessons and Personal GuardrailsSummaryIn this conversation, Brad Ward shares his journey of self-discovery, coming out, and the impact of trauma on his life. He discusses his transition from a career in banking to nonprofit work and coaching, emphasizing the importance of mindfulness and healing. Brad also explores the concept of joy and its vulnerability, while reflecting on the lessons he has learned about kindness and compassion.TakeawaysBrad's coming out journey began at a young age.He faced challenges in reconciling his sexuality with his religious upbringing.Brad experienced trauma related to his identity and upbringing.He transitioned from banking to nonprofit work, finding purpose in helping others.Mindfulness plays a crucial role in managing trauma and emotions.Joy is a complex emotion that requires presence and authenticity.Brad emphasizes the importance of kindness and compassion in life.He believes in the power of community for LGBTQ+ individuals.Brad's work focuses on helping clients heal from trauma.He is currently writing a book exploring the nature of joy.BioBrad Ward, PCC, TICC, TIRC brings 20 years of nonprofit leadership experience to his professional coaching practice. His style is all about inclusivity, support, and holistic growth. He reminds clients that leadership is found within: it's an inner journey. Drawing on his professional and personal experiences and insights, he helps his clients to expand their perception of themselves and their strengths, and to deepen their appreciation of who they are. Brad is a Professional Certified Coach credentialed through the International Coaching Federation, a Certified Trauma-Informed Coach and Certified Trauma-Informed Relationship Coach from Moving The Human Spirit, and a Certified Values Coach from Discover Your Values, LLC.https://www.bradwardcoaching.com/mailto:brad@bradwardcoaching.comContact Wilkinson:  BecomingWilkinson@gmail.comPhoto: Copyright Wilkinson/2025
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May 25, 2025 • 32min

SAMUEL MOFFATT: His early life in a Southern Baptist family, surviving conversion therapy and transitioning to acting on stage.

Chapters:00:00Introduction and Background01:12Theater Experience and Personal Growth01:55Coming Out Journey07:07Family Dynamics and Relationships07:45Boy Scouts and Early Trauma12:37Path to Acting and New Beginnings15:39Moving to New York and New Opportunities17:47Journey Through New York and Palm Springs18:57Love and Relationships in Transition19:37Theater Dreams and New Beginnings21:24The Impact of 'The Inheritance'22:29Vulnerability on Stage27:05Life Lessons and Moving ForwardSummary:In this conversation, Sam Moffatt shares his journey of coming out as a gay man, detailing the challenges he faced growing up in a Southern Baptist family, including experiences with conversion therapy. He discusses his early involvement in theater, his move to New York City to pursue acting, and the complexities of his relationship with his parents. Sam emphasizes the importance of kindness, understanding, and the power of changing one's environment for better mental health. He also shares insights on the significance of humor and authenticity in life.Bio:Samuel Moffatt is a stage and screen actor, singer-songwriter, and multi-instrumentalist originally from Duncan, Oklahoma. Now based in New York City after a recent move from Palm Springs, Samuel is passionate about musical theatre and has brought his talents to a variety of roles across both coasts. A graduate of Texas A&M University, he blends his theatrical work with original music, accompanying himself on piano and guitar. Whether performing under the spotlight or writing his next song, Samuel brings heart, authenticity, and a deep love for storytelling to everything he does.Takeaways:*Sam's journey of coming out was challenging due to his Southern Baptist upbringing.*He faced conversion therapy, which was traumatic and damaging.*Sam's experience in Boy Scouts led to legal troubles and further challenges.*Acting became a vital outlet for Sam, allowing him to express himself.*He moved to New York to pursue his dreams after college, despite his parents' wishes.*Sam's relationship with his parents has improved over time, but remains complex.*He emphasizes the importance of kindness and understanding towards others.*Sam believes in the power of changing one's environment for better mental health.*He encourages others to pursue their passions, even in the face of adversity.*Humor and fun are essential in life, according to Sam.https://www.instagram.com/samuelmoffatt/https://www.tiktok.com/@samuelmoffattContact Wilkinson: BecomingWilkinson@gmail.comPhoto: Wilkinson/2025

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