Black Girl Burnout

Kelley Bonner
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Oct 15, 2025 • 29min

Opt Into Getting Your Life Together—Gently

In this episode of the Black Girl Burnout podcast, Kelley shares an honest check-in she calls The Getting My Life Together Toolkit. Instead of another rigid routine or “glow-up” plan, she offers the small, sustaining habits and mindset shifts that are actually helping her through life’s “life-ing.” From soft structure and nervous system routines to practical self-care rituals, Kelley invites you to build your own toolkit—one rooted in gentleness, intention, and capacity, not perfection.KEY TAKEAWAYSStructure can be soft. Create routines that support you—not drain you—by honoring your real capacity, not your ambition.Habits can soothe your nervous system. Small grounding rituals like making your bed, dressing intentionally, and setting calm boundaries bring steadiness to your days.Dress for the energy you want. Even when working from home, wearing real clothes can signal self-respect and shift your mindset.Protect your peace before bed. Limiting dysregulating content at night helps your nervous system unwind and deepens rest.EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS[00:00–03:00] A Real-Life Check-In: Kelley explains why she’s naming this season her “Getting My Life Together Toolkit” and shares what inspired it.[03:00–07:00] The Type A Recovery Plan: How she’s learning to make to-do lists that honor capacity rather than overachievement.[07:00–11:00] Nervous System Habits That Stick: From making her bed to red-light therapy, Kelley shares small routines that make her mornings calmer.[11:00–17:00] Dressing for Your Day: How shifting from hoodies to cozy two-piece sets has changed her energy and self-respect.[17:00–22:00] Protecting Peace at Night: Why she no longer watches intense or “dysregulating” shows after 7 p.m., and how it’s improving her sleep and calm.[22:00–28:00] Building Your Own Toolkit: Kelley invites listeners to reflect on what’s actually helping them through and share their own soft lock-in routines.YOUR TURNTake a few minutes today to build your own Getting My Life Together Toolkit.Write down 3 small things—habits, tools, or mindset shifts—that help you feel more grounded or capable right now.Then, share one of them with us on social media using #BlackGirlBurnout.Your toolkit doesn’t have to be perfect—just supportive. That’s the real goal.SUPPORT THE SHOWAre you stepping into a “Summer of No”? Whether you’re canceling plans for rest, setting fresh boundaries, or saying no to what drains you, you don’t owe anyone guilt. Take a moment this week to capture what freedom looks like for you. Snap a pic or video of your joy and tag us:📱 @blackgirlburnout📧 Subscribe to our newsletter: blackgirlburnout.com📺 Watch the episode on YouTube💌 Show some love—don’t let Kelley’s mama be the only one dropping hearts!STAY IN TOUCHWant more ways to connect with the Black Girl Burnout community?Join our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.Become a paid Substack subscriber ($8/month—the cost of a latte!) for exclusive resources and tools to support your burnout-free life.OUR SPONSORSCheck out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGBCheck out Homeaglow: https://homeaglow.com/BGBSavvy Ladies: https://www.savvyladies.org/Advertising Inquiries: RedCirclePrivacy & Opt-Out: RedCircleOur Sponsors:* Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGB* Check out PharmaNutra and use my code BGB for a great deal: https://pharmanutra-us.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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Oct 8, 2025 • 59min

Opt Into Building Wealth and Worth with Precious L. Williams

In this powerful episode of Black Girl Burnout, host Kelley sits down with Precious L. Williams, 13-time national elevator pitch champion, bestselling author, and CEO of The Pitch Perfect Group. Precious shares her remarkable story of resilience—rising from homelessness and heartbreak to global recognition as a speaker and business leader. Together, she and Kelley explore the intersections of financial empowerment, community, and self-worth, revealing why abundance requires both strategy and self-belief.This conversation is both practical and deeply inspiring, reminding you that the road to wealth—financial, emotional, and spiritual—begins with owning your story and standing in your power.Key TakeawaysYour next chapter isn’t too late—it’s right on time. Precious shares how she rebuilt her life and business after deep loss, proving that resilience is learned, not innate.Financial education starts with self-worth. True wealth begins with knowing your value, asking for what you deserve, and refusing to shrink.Find gate openers, not just supporters. Community matters—but so does access. Surround yourself with people who open doors, not just cheer from the sidelines.Lead from power, not pain. Precious urges Black women to stop introducing themselves through their trauma and instead stand firm in their brilliance, talent, and results.Episode Highlights & Timestamps[00:04:50] The Power of a Plot Twist: Precious shares her journey from attorney to entrepreneur—and the leap of faith that changed her life.[00:10:57] Building Wealth from the Inside Out: A deep discussion on the emotional roots of financial literacy and why community matters more than credit scores.[00:32:45] Gatekeepers vs. Gate Openers: Kelley and Precious unpack how mentorship, access, and allyship shape the financial futures of Black women.[00:46:21] Leading with Power, Not Pity: Precious reflects on how she learned to tell her story from a place of victory, not victimhood—and why that shift attracts abundance.Reflection InvitationTake a quiet moment after this episode to ask yourself:Where in my life am I still playing small?Who are my true gate openers—the people who speak my name in rooms I haven’t yet entered?What would change if I started leading from my power instead of my pain?Write down one area—big or small—where you’re ready to build both wealth and worth, then take one step this week that aligns with that truth.Connect with PreciousWebsiteInstagramOrder all 5 of Precious's best-selling books!Support the ShowAre you experimenting with new ways to rest? Whether it’s saying no to one more obligation, shutting your laptop at 5 p.m., or taking a slow walk with no agenda, capture that moment of ease. Share it with us:@blackgirlburnoutSubscribe to our newsletter: blackgirlburnout.comWatch the episode on YouTubeDrop a review—help us spread the word that rest is not weakness.Stay In TouchJoin our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.Become a paid Substack subscriber ($8/month—the cost of a latte!) for exclusive resources to support your burnout-free life.Our Sponsors:Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGBCheck out Pharmanutra: pharmanutra-us.comSavvy Ladies: https://www.savvyladies.org/Advertising Inquiries: RedCirclePrivacy & Opt-Out: RedCircleOur Sponsors:* Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGB* Check out PharmaNutra and use my code BGB for a great deal: https://pharmanutra-us.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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Oct 1, 2025 • 25min

Opt Into A Soft Pivot

In this reflective solo episode, Kelley invites you into the quiet, powerful moment when change begins—not with a bang, but with a whisper. Whether you’re shifting careers, reevaluating relationships, or letting go of an identity you’ve outgrown, this conversation holds space for the soft, honest pivot. The one you make not out of burnout or collapse, but from clarity, self-trust, and care.This is an episode about tuning in, not performing. About choosing yourself before things fall apart. And about the courage it takes to release something—even when it once brought you joy.Key TakeawaysThe soft pivot honors the quiet nudge before the crash. You don’t have to break to begin again. Listening early can save you pain later.Outgrowing a role, job, or identity doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It means you're evolving—and evolution comes with grief, grace, and growth.Stillness is strategic. Get still before you get busy. Let your body weigh in on your next move. Expansiveness is a signal.You can take a small step without having the whole plan. A pivot can begin with a journal entry, a whispered truth, or a shift in energy.Episode Highlights & Timestamps[00:05:23] Choose to bend before you breakKelley introduces the concept of the soft pivot—a gentle, intentional shift before burnout forces your hand. She explores what it means to move from alignment instead of collapse.[00:09:22] You can love something and still need to leave itA tender reflection on grief, identity, and how hard it can be to walk away from something you’re good at—even when it’s no longer right for you.[00:16:08] Get still before you get strategicKelley offers practical insight on the difference between reacting and recalibrating. Stillness isn’t inactivity—it’s preparation.[00:20:11] CTA: What are you outgrowing right now?The episode ends with a powerful question: "What are you holding onto that no longer feels true about yourself?"Support the ShowAre you experimenting with new ways to rest? Whether it’s saying no to one more obligation, shutting your laptop at 5 p.m., or taking a slow walk with no agenda, capture that moment of ease. Share it with us:@blackgirlburnoutSubscribe to our newsletter: blackgirlburnout.comWatch the episode on YouTubeDrop a review—help us spread the word that rest is not weakness.Stay In TouchJoin our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.Become a paid Substack subscriber ($8/month—the cost of a latte!) for exclusive resources to support your burnout-free life.Our Sponsors:Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGBCheck out Homeaglow: https://homeaglow.com/BGBSavvy Ladies: https://www.savvyladies.org/Advertising Inquiries: RedCirclePrivacy & Opt-Out: RedCircleOur Sponsors:* Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGB* Check out PharmaNutra and use my code BGB for a great deal: https://pharmanutra-us.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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Sep 24, 2025 • 37min

Opt Into Living in Your Purpose with Melissa A. Mitchell

In this episode of Black Girl Burnout, Kelley sits down with artist, author, and entrepreneur Melissa A. Mitchell, who turned grief into a global creative career. Together, they explore how art became a source of healing and purpose, the pressure of constant performance in entrepreneurship, and the role of boundaries and honesty in resisting burnout. Melissa shares how she stays grounded in her “why,” protects her energy, and chooses joy while building a vibrant legacy.Key TakeawaysPurpose can emerge from even the most painful beginnings—and it can sustain you through growth.Boundaries and small daily choices help protect creativity and joy.You don’t have to perform for social media or others to be successful.Burnout often signals misalignment; pausing and telling yourself the truth can restore balance.Episode Highlights[00:02:11] Melissa shares how grief and a chance encounter with paint transformed her life into a purpose-driven journey.[00:05:19] The pressure to “perform” online and how she learned to resist constant visibility.[00:07:18] Small acts—like wearing a headband instead of pushing through—show the power of gentle boundary-setting.[00:10:44] Signs burnout is approaching and the importance of honoring your true capacity.A Reflection for YouMelissa’s story is a reminder that your purpose is not about performing—it’s about aligning with what truly sustains you. Where might you be performing instead of living in your truth? This week, choose one small act that honors your capacity.Support the ShowAre you experimenting with new ways to rest? Whether it’s saying no to one more obligation, shutting your laptop at 5 p.m., or taking a slow walk with no agenda, capture that moment of ease. Share it with us:@blackgirlburnoutSubscribe to our newsletter: blackgirlburnout.comWatch the episode on YouTubeDrop a review—help us spread the word that rest is not weakness.Stay In TouchJoin our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.Become a paid Substack subscriber ($8/month—the cost of a latte!) for exclusive resources to support your burnout-free life.Our Sponsors:Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGBCheck out Homeaglow: https://homeaglow.com/BGBSavvy Ladies: https://www.savvyladies.org/Advertising Inquiries: RedCirclePrivacy & Opt-Out: RedCircleOur Sponsors:* Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGB* Check out PharmaNutra and use my code BGB for a great deal: https://pharmanutra-us.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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Sep 17, 2025 • 31min

Opt Into Rest: How Black Women Can Protect Their Peace in Chaotic Times

In this episode of Black Girl Burnout, Kelley invites you to step away from the constant noise of the news cycle and social media to reclaim rest, joy, and nervous system regulation. In a world that feels heavy and overwhelming, she reminds us that rest is not weakness—it’s resistance. This conversation is both a pause and a practice: an invitation to slow down, honor your body’s signals, and remember that choosing ease is a radical act of survival.Key Takeaways:Rest is resistance—it disrupts hustle culture and allows your body to reset.Black women often default to overwork as a trauma response, but it keeps the nervous system stuck in stress.Chaos in the world cannot be solved by hustling harder; rest is the counterintuitive answer.Practical rest can look like logging off, doing nothing, or giving yourself permission to stop.Joy and nervous system regulation are not luxuries—they are essential for resilience.Episode Highlights:00:39 – Why chaos leaves Black women’s nervous systems on high alert03:44 – Overwork as a trauma response: why “doing more” doesn’t heal05:23 – The limits of hustle culture in unsafe or unstable times07:18 – Kelley’s own journey of unlearning the impulse to fight and do08:58 – Rest as resistance: what it looks like in daily life09:57 – Practical examples of rest—logging off, pausing, reclaiming stillness11:25 – Developing your personal rest toolkit (5–10 practices you can use right away)13:01 – Guided meditation for calm and nervous system resetGentle Reflection Prompt:What does rest as resistance look like in your life right now?If this episode brings you relief, share it with someone who may be caught in the cycle of doing more when their body is begging for rest. And don’t forget to leave a review—it helps other Black women find the show and reclaim their joy.Support the ShowAre you experimenting with new ways to rest? Whether it’s saying no to one more obligation, shutting your laptop at 5 p.m., or taking a slow walk with no agenda, capture that moment of ease. Share it with us:@blackgirlburnoutSubscribe to our newsletter: blackgirlburnout.comWatch the episode on YouTubeDrop a review—help us spread the word that rest is not weakness.Stay In TouchJoin our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.Become a paid Substack subscriber ($8/month—the cost of a latte!) for exclusive resources to support your burnout-free life.Our Sponsors:Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGBCheck out Homeaglow: https://homeaglow.com/BGBSavvy Ladies: https://www.savvyladies.org/Advertising Inquiries: RedCirclePrivacy & Opt-Out: RedCircleOur Sponsors:* Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGB* Check out PharmaNutra and use my code BGB for a great deal: https://pharmanutra-us.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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Sep 10, 2025 • 38min

The Fall Reset: Why I'm Locking-in, Letting Go, And Closing the Year With Ease

Episode SummaryAs the year winds down, it’s easy to get swept into urgency—pushing harder, chasing more, and sprinting to the finish line. In this episode, Kelley invites you to embrace fall’s real lesson: letting go, slowing down, and closing the year with gentleness. She shares her practice of a “soft lock-in,” grounded in rest, ease, and intentional focus, offering you a way to rebuild without burnout and enter the next season with steadiness instead of strain.Key TakeawaysFall teaches the sacred practice of letting go—releasing what no longer serves you is as valuable as what you choose to hold.A “soft lock-in” allows you to set meaningful goals without urgency, grounded in alignment rather than hustle.Prioritizing rest and ease isn’t giving up—it’s the foundation for sustainable success.Closing the year well means centering on what matters most and composting what distracts or depletes.Episode Highlights[00:00] The seasonal rush of urgency and Kelley’s alternative: choosing ease over hustle.[05:08] Rebuilding after a devastating year: grounding in core strength and clarity.[09:28] Naming three core goals—rest, financial ease, and sustainable rhythms.[19:45] Reframing the “12-week year” as a tool for gentleness, not pressure.[32:10] Reflection on what it means to close the year proud, not depleted.An Invitation to ReflectChoose three things that truly matter to you for the rest of this year, and give yourself permission to release what doesn’t. Then, take a quiet moment to reflect: What can I lovingly let go of this fall so I can finish proud, not depleted?Support the ShowAre you stepping into a “Summer of No”? Whether you’re canceling plans for rest, setting fresh boundaries, or saying no to what drains you, you don’t owe anyone guilt. Take a moment this week to capture what freedom looks like for you. Snap a pic or video of your joy and tag us:📱 @blackgirlburnout📧 Subscribe to our newsletter: blackgirlburnout.com📺 Watch the episode on YouTube💌 Show some love—don’t let Kelley’s mama be the only one dropping hearts!Have a question for our upcoming Q&A episode? [Click here to submit your questions!]Stay In TouchWant more ways to connect with the Black Girl Burnout community?Join our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.Become a paid Substack subscriber ($8/month—the cost of a latte!) for exclusive resources and tools to support your burnout-free life.Our Sponsors:Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGBCheck out Homeaglow: https://homeaglow.com/BGBGlobal Healing: https://globalhealing.com/Savvy Ladies: https://www.savvyladies.org/Advertising Inquiries: RedCirclePrivacy & Opt-Out: RedCircleOur Sponsors:* Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGB* Check out PharmaNutra and use my code BGB for a great deal: https://pharmanutra-us.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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Sep 3, 2025 • 25min

Opt Into Private Joy: How to Heal Without the Audience

In this episode of Black Girl Burnout, Kelley explores the pressure to make wellness a performance and reminds you that your healing doesn’t need an audience. She offers a gentle invitation to reclaim private joy, protect your peace, and let your journey be sacred—away from the constant pull of comparison culture.Key TakeawaysHealing loses power when it becomes performance; keep parts of your journey private to preserve its sacredness.Comparison culture can worsen burnout and keep you from authentic rest and joy.A slower, quieter approach to growth often leads to deeper, more sustainable healing.Joy is something to be lived, not proven or posted.Episode Highlights00:30 – Why Kelley sees September as a time to recommit to wellness and rest03:00 – The tension between sharing your healing publicly and keeping it private05:11 – The hidden cost of performing healing online and how it fuels burnout07:54 – The quiet strength of women who choose slower, softer, more solid healing09:37 – Why joy is meant to be lived, not performed for an audienceListen and ReflectAs you listen, consider:Where in your healing or wellness journey are you performing instead of truly tending to yourself?What would it look like to keep one practice, ritual, or step of your growth completely private—for you alone?How might moving slower or softer feel more solid and sustainable?Take a moment this week to choose one area of your life to keep offstage. Let it be yours, sacred and whole, without needing validation or visibility.Support the ShowAre you stepping into a “Summer of No”? Whether you’re canceling plans for rest, setting fresh boundaries, or saying no to what drains you, you don’t owe anyone guilt. Take a moment this week to capture what freedom looks like for you. Snap a pic or video of your joy and tag us:📱 @blackgirlburnout📧 Subscribe to our newsletter: blackgirlburnout.com📺 Watch the episode on YouTube💌 Show some love—don’t let Kelley’s mama be the only one dropping hearts!Have a question for our upcoming Q&A episode? [Click here to submit your questions!]Stay In TouchWant more ways to connect with the Black Girl Burnout community?Join our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.Become a paid Substack subscriber ($8/month—the cost of a latte!) for exclusive resources and tools to support your burnout-free life.Our Sponsors:Global Healing: https://globalhealing.com/Savvy Ladies: https://www.savvyladies.org/Advertising Inquiries: RedCirclePrivacy & Opt-Out: RedCircleOur Sponsors:* Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGB* Check out PharmaNutra and use my code BGB for a great deal: https://pharmanutra-us.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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Aug 29, 2025 • 5min

Opt Into Planning for Joy

In this special Labor Day episode of Black Girl Burnout, host Kelley invites you to pause, breathe, and reflect on the role of joy in your life. While sharing her own story of navigating stress and reclaiming rest, Kelley offers a gentle reminder that joy doesn’t have to be spontaneous—it can be something we intentionally plan for, just like vacations, appointments, and work projects.This episode is a nudge to slow down, release the pressure of constant labor, and carve out space for rest, peace, and delight.KEY TAKEAWAYSYour nervous system may be asking for deep rest and regulation—not just more productivity.Planning for joy is just as essential as planning for responsibilities.When life feels overwhelming, intentionally scheduling joy can restore balance and ease.Joy doesn’t have to be grand; even a day on the couch with a good book counts.Asking yourself “What’s next for joy in my life?” can be a powerful reset.EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS00:20 Why rest—not labor—should be prioritized on Labor Day02:00 Choosing to plan for joy instead of only focusing on the next project02:34 A reflection: What joy is coming up for you?03:00 Giving yourself permission to pause and make joy intentionalLISTEN & REFLECTTake a moment this week to plan one small joy for yourself. Maybe it’s an afternoon nap, a favorite meal, or time with a good book.What’s next for joy in your life?If this episode resonated with you, share it with a friend who also deserves to rest and recharge. Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and leave a review to support the Black Girl Burnout community.Support the ShowAre you stepping into a “Summer of No”? Whether you’re canceling plans for rest, setting fresh boundaries, or saying no to what drains you, you don’t owe anyone guilt. Take a moment this week to capture what freedom looks like for you. Snap a pic or video of your joy and tag us:📱 @blackgirlburnout📧 Subscribe to our newsletter: blackgirlburnout.com📺 Watch the episode on YouTube💌 Show some love—don’t let Kelley’s mama be the only one dropping hearts!Have a question for our upcoming Q&A episode? [Click here to submit your questions!]Stay In TouchWant more ways to connect with the Black Girl Burnout community?✨ Join our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.✨ Become a paid Substack subscriber ($8/month—the cost of a latte!) for exclusive resources and tools to support your burnout-free life.Our Sponsor:Global Healing: https://globalhealing.com/Savvy Ladies: https://www.savvyladies.org/Advertising Inquiries: RedCirclePrivacy & Opt-Out: RedCircleOur Sponsors:* Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGB* Check out PharmaNutra and use my code BGB for a great deal: https://pharmanutra-us.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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Aug 27, 2025 • 21min

You're Not Tired, You're Tapped Out

In this episode of Black Girl Burnout, Kelley shares the powerful truth that exhaustion isn’t always about needing more sleep. Sometimes, your body is tapped out—living in chronic stress and unable to downshift into rest. Drawing from her own story of nervous system dysregulation, she unpacks how years of carrying too much can leave you wired even while exhausted. This conversation is an invitation to pause, reset, and explore practices that bring your body back to safety.Key Takeaways:Being tapped out means your nervous system is stuck in stress mode—it’s different from simple tiredness.Chronic stress can disrupt sleep, spike heart rate, and create physical symptoms even at rest.Black women are often conditioned to self-silence and normalize pain, leading to hidden depletion.Vacations, catch-up naps, or “pushing through” don’t heal nervous system dysregulation.True restoration comes from nervous system resets, boundaries, joy practices, and professional support.Episode Highlights:00:38 – Kelley's story: sleep struggles, smart ring tracking, and discovering heart rate spikes03:18 – Learning her nervous system was stuck in stress mode05:29 – The deeper difference between tiredness and being tapped out07:06 – How cultural self-silencing leads to chronic stress in Black women09:20 – Why ignoring symptoms or relying only on vacations doesn’t help12:13 – Small nervous system resets anyone can try13:27 – Boundaries and the importance of daily self-care13:55 – Normalizing medical and therapeutic support15:18 – Joy resets: music, rituals, creativity17:13 – Reflection prompt: How do you know when you’re tapped out?Gentle Reflection Prompt:What’s one sign for you that you’re tapped out—not just tired?If this episode resonates, share it with someone who might be running on empty without realizing it. And don’t forget to leave a review—it helps other Black women find the show and start their own journey out of burnout.Support the ShowAre you stepping into a “Summer of No”? Whether you’re canceling plans for rest, setting fresh boundaries, or saying no to what drains you, you don’t owe anyone guilt. Take a moment this week to capture what freedom looks like for you. Snap a pic or video of your joy and tag us:📱 @blackgirlburnout📧 Subscribe to our newsletter: blackgirlburnout.com📺 Watch the episode on YouTube💌 Show some love—don’t let Kelley’s mama be the only one dropping hearts!Have a question for our upcoming Q&A episode? [Click here to submit your questions!]Stay In TouchWant more ways to connect with the Black Girl Burnout community?✨ Join our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.✨ Become a paid Substack subscriber ($8/month—the cost of a latte!) for exclusive resources and tools to support your burnout-free life.Our Sponsor:Savvy Ladies: https://www.savvyladies.org/Advertising Inquiries: RedCirclePrivacy & Opt-Out: RedCircleOur Sponsors:* Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGB* Check out PharmaNutra and use my code BGB for a great deal: https://pharmanutra-us.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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Aug 22, 2025 • 19min

Opt Into Gate Openers: Stop Confusing Support with Elevation (Bonus Episode)

In this bonus “love note” episode, Kelley Bonner breaks down the crucial difference between supporters — the friends and peers who cheer you on — and gate openers, the decision-makers who can truly elevate your career. Many of us confuse the two, surrounding ourselves with cheerleaders but missing the people who can actually open doors. Kelley shares personal stories, practical tips, and a simple reflection exercise to help you identify who’s in your corner, who can advance you, and how to build relationships with intention and integrity.Key Takeaways:Supporters are vital for encouragement and sustainability, but they can’t always elevate your career.Gate openers are decision-makers — executives, leaders, and people with power to create opportunities.Most of us have many supporters but very few gate openers — and that gap matters.A single gate opener can change your career trajectory.You can intentionally nurture these relationships with respect, value, and patience.Episode Highlights:00:27 – The big question: Who’s really elevating you?01:23 – Supporters vs. gate openers: a career conversation throwback03:13 – Defining supporters: peers, friends, colleagues who sustain you05:28 – Why peers can’t always “put you on” — Kelley’s government job example06:40 – Defining gate openers: leaders with decision-making authority08:11 – How one gate opener changed Kelley’s career trajectory10:26 – Supporters sustain you; gate openers elevate you12:01 – The reality: supporters are often Black women; gate openers are often men in power14:57 – Reflection exercise: make your supporters vs. gate openers list16:22 – Four tips for identifying and nurturing gate openers18:19 – Building relationships with integrity, not transaction18:53 – Closing encouragement + Substack invitationLet Us KnowTake a few minutes today to write two lists: your supporters and your gate openers. Notice the gap. Then choose one potential gate opener in your orbit and begin thinking about how to nurture that relationship with intention and integrity.Support the ShowAre you stepping into a “Summer of No”? Whether you’re canceling plans for rest, setting fresh boundaries, or saying no to what drains you, you don’t owe anyone guilt. Take a moment this week to capture what freedom looks like for you. Snap a pic or video of your joy and tag us:📱 @blackgirlburnout📧 Subscribe to our newsletter: blackgirlburnout.com📺 Watch the episode on YouTube💌 Show some love—don’t let Kelley’s mama be the only one dropping hearts!Have a question for our upcoming Q&A episode? [Click here to submit your questions!]Stay In TouchWant more ways to connect with the Black Girl Burnout community?✨ Join our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.✨ Become a paid Substack subscriber ($8/month—the cost of a latte!) for exclusive resources and tools to support your burnout-free life.Our Sponsor:Savvy Ladies: https://www.savvyladies.org/Advertising Inquiries: RedCirclePrivacy & Opt-Out: RedCircleOur Sponsors:* Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGB* Check out PharmaNutra and use my code BGB for a great deal: https://pharmanutra-us.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

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