Let's Parent on Purpose: Christian Marriage, Parenting, and Discipleship

In this powerful and uplifting conversation, Jay Holland sits down with beloved pastor and best-selling author Max Lucado to explore the themes of his newest book, Tame Your Thoughts. With decades of pastoral experience and 40+ books to his name, Max shares deep biblical wisdom and practical tools to help both adults and children manage their thought lives through faith and truth.Together, Jay and Max discuss:Why our internal narratives shape our lives—and how to rewrite themHow brain science is finally catching up to biblical truthThree powerful tools for mental and emotional health:Practice Picky ThinkingIdentify UFOs (Untruths → False Narratives → Overreactions)Uproot and Replant with ScriptureHow lies about identity and failure can derail both teens and parentsWhy recognizing and correcting our own thought patterns as parents can transform our relationshipsThe surprising story behind Max Lucado’s first tattoo at age 70 (hint: it’s a Greek word from the cross)This episode is packed with insight, encouragement, and tools to help you and your family live freer, more Christ-centered lives.Key Takeaways:“You get to control the story in your head, but the story in your head will control you.” – Jay HollandBelief leads to behavior. Shaping your belief begins by shaping your thoughts.Studies show people with a belief in a loving God recover from disease at exponentially higher rates.Scripture and neuroscience both affirm that your brain can be renewed.Parental overreactions often stem from unexamined false narratives—recognize and replace them with truth.Teaching your kids to identify untruths and replant with Scripture equips them for lifelong emotional resilience.Scripture Highlighted in This Episode:Proverbs 4:23 – "Be careful how you think; your life is shaped by your thoughts."Romans 12:2 – "Be transformed by the renewing of your mind..."Philippians 4:8 – “Whatever is true... think about such things.”Romans 8:1 – “There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.”Max’s 3-Step Toolkit for Mental Health:Step 1: Practice Picky Thinking – Don’t believe every thought you think. Guard your mind’s door.Step 2: Identify UFOs – Trace overreactions back to false narratives and root lies.Step 3: Uproot and Replant – Replace toxic thoughts with Scripture and truth.Let’s Parent on Purpose is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcasting Network. For more information, visit www.ChristianParenting.orgBioMax Lucado is a pastor, speaker, and best-selling author of more than 40 books for adults and children. Known for his warmth, biblical insight, and storytelling, Max’s work has encouraged millions to embrace the grace of God. He serves as Teaching Pastor at Oak Hills Church in San Antonio, Texas, and continues to write, speak, and share God’s love globally.Resources mentioned:Tame Your Thoughts by Max Lucado – Available wherever books are soldMaxLucado.com – Devotions, YouTube channel Fresh Hope, and moreJoin my Things for Thursday Email List and get a free Marriage Snapshot Tool and Fun Family Conversation Ebook! Support Let’s Parent on Purpose as we help families thrive through the gospel: https://letsparentonpurpose.com/support/

Discover a new parenting tune-up resource designed to help evaluate and adapt parenting strategies. Delve into the importance of changing approaches as kids grow, with biblical encouragement drawn from Psalms and Proverbs. Learn about the 'Oxygen Mask Principle' for parent self-care and strategies for celebrating children’s positive traits. The discussion encourages family reflection and growth, emphasizing the value of community and support in the parenting journey.

In this episode, Jay discusses the importance of maintaining a healthy marriage through a structured tool he developed called the 'Marriage Tune-Up.' He outlines different levels of marriage, from crisis to flourishing, and emphasizes the need for regular maintenance and intentionality in relationships. The conversation highlights biblical principles and practical steps couples can take to improve their marriages and become a blessing to others. TakeawaysMarriage requires periodic maintenance just like a vehicle.There are different levels of marriage, each with unique characteristics.Emergency level indicates a marriage in crisis needing immediate attention.Stable but stuck marriages function but lack connection and intimacy.Growing marriages are healthy and intentional with regular rhythms of connection.Flourishing marriages thrive in unity and shared purpose.Catalytic marriages serve as a kingdom force, mentoring others.Encouragement is vital for softening hearts in a marriage.Forgiveness is essential but does not equal trust or lack of boundaries.Regular rhythms of repentance and prayer can lead to a healthier marriage.Let’s Parent on Purpose is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcasting Network. For more information, visit www.ChristianParenting.orgResources mentioned:Join my Things for Thursday Email List to get a copy of the Marriage Tune-Up tool!Support Let’s Parent on Purpose as we help families thrive through the gospel: https://letsparentonpurpose.com/support/

In this conversation, Jay Holland, Ed Uszynski, and Brian Smith discuss the complexities of youth sports culture, emphasizing the need for a shift in perspective among parents and coaches. They explore the concept of the 'youth sports industrial complex,' the impact of parental influence, and the importance of character development in sports. The discussion highlights the detrimental effects of snowplow parenting and the need for intentional discipleship opportunities within the youth sports experience. In this conversation, the speakers discuss the importance of instilling gratitude and character in youth sports, contrasting the focus on competition and statistics with the value of personal growth and relationships. They emphasize the need for parents to support their children in a balanced way, encouraging them to appreciate the joy of sports while also recognizing the pressures of year-round competition and early specialization. The discussion culminates in a vision for families to engage in sports as a means of discipleship and community building.TakeawaysThe youth sports industrial complex is a billion-dollar industry.Parents need to be the first to be discipled in sports culture.Character development in sports is influenced by the adults involved.Snowplow parenting inhibits children's ability to think independently.Winning is often prioritized over character in youth sports.Discipleship opportunities arise from observing sports interactions.Parents should teach their kids to notice others in sports.The culture of sports can shape our values and beliefs.Coaches have a significant impact on children's development.We need to reform our thinking about youth sports. Training kids to thank referees and spectators is vital.The GOAT debate highlights character over statistics.Living with gratitude leads to a more joyful life.Pursuing excellence doesn't mean sacrificing compassion.Recognizing marginalized teammates fosters inclusivity.Year-round competition is not necessary for success.Early specialization can be detrimental to athletes.Parents should focus on enjoying the game with their kids.Remove anxiety from the sports experience for children.Sports can be a platform for discipleship and community.Let’s Parent on Purpose is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcasting Network. For more information, visit www.ChristianParenting.orgBioAbout Brian Smith Brian Smith is the author of several books including his latest Away Game: A Christian Parent’s Guide to Navigating Youth Sports and The Christian Athlete: Glorifying God in Sports. He has been on staff with Athletes in Action since 2008. A graduate of Wake Forest University, Brian has a master’s degree in Theology and Sports Studies through Baylor University. He lives in Lowell, Michigan, with his wife and three kids. Social Media: Website: www.thechristianathlete.comTwitter: @BrianSmithAIAInstagram: @brianlinseyAbout Ed Uszynski Ed Uszynski is an author, speaker, and sports minister with over three decades’ experience discipling college and professional athletes. His latest book is Away Game: A Christian Parent’s Guide to Navigating Youth Sports. He’s written articles, essays, and training manuals at the intersection of faith and sport and is the lead strategist for Content Mercenaries. He has two theological degrees from Trinity Evangelical Divinity School and a PhD in American Culture Studies from Bowling Green State University. He and his wife Amy have four children and live in Xenia, Ohio.Social Media: Website: www.untanglingcrt.comTwitter: @uszynski32Facebook: @ed.uszynski.3Resources mentioned:Away Game: A Christian Parent’s Guide to Navigating Youth Sports: https://amzn.to/43QFoQIAthletes in Action: https://athletesinaction.org/ Join my Things for Thursday Email List and get a free Marriage Snapshot Tool and Fun Family Conversation Ebook! Support Let’s Parent on Purpose as we help families thrive through the gospel: https://letsparentonpurpose.com/support/

This episode serves as a parental companion to Jay’s Guided By Faith Daily Devotional Podcast series on Living the Mission. In this episode, Jay discusses the importance of living a mission-driven life within the context of family and community. He emphasizes that the Great Commission is not just for missionaries abroad but applies to everyday life. Jay provides practical tips for parents to instill a mission mindset in their families, encouraging them to engage with their neighborhoods, practice hospitality, and serve others. He highlights the long-term impact of these actions and invites listeners to join his series on living the mission.TakeawaysThe Great Commission applies to our daily lives.Living missionally can transform family dynamics.Prayer walking helps engage with the community.Hospitality is a key aspect of living on mission.Serving together as a family fosters unity.Sharing faith authentically normalizes conversations about Jesus.Being rooted in community strengthens faith.Long-term relationships have a greater impact than short-term mission trips.Small, faithful steps lead to significant changes over time.Engaging with neighbors opens doors for ministry opportunities.Listen to the episode and let it inspire you to see your summer with fresh eyes—ready to live on mission as a family!Resources mentioned:Guided by Faith: www.guidedbyfaith.netSpotify: https://spoti.fi/4cLI2d7Apple Podcast: https://apple.co/4cOVBbKYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@GuidedbyFaithPodcastJoin my Things for Thursday Email List and get a free Marriage Snapshot Tool and Fun Family Conversation Ebook! Support Let’s Parent on Purpose as we help families thrive through the gospel: https://letsparentonpurpose.com/support/

For the first time in the history of the Barna Research, more young women are leaving the faith than young men. Jay Holland and Cicely Corry discuss the work of Barna, focusing on the intersection of church and culture. They explore the methodologies used in their research, the importance of data for parents and leaders, and the concerning trend of young women disengaging from faith. Cicely shares insights into the reasons behind this trend, including social dynamics and perceptions of safety within church communities. The discussion emphasizes the need for churches to create welcoming environments for young women and the role of community in fostering faith. This conversation explores the dynamics of friendships between genders, the importance of intentionality in building relationships, and the empowerment of young women in leadership roles. It discusses the challenges faced by Gen Z in navigating faith and spirituality, emphasizing the need for mentorship and community support. The dialogue highlights the role of parents in fostering curiosity and community among their children to help them thrive in their faith journey.TakeawaysParents can benefit from Barna's insights to raise their children in faith.Young women are increasingly identifying as having no faith, a concerning trend.Social dynamics and safety perceptions impact young women's engagement with church.Community and friendship are vital for youth engagement in church.Churches need to create safe spaces for young women.Men's friendships often thrive on shared interests. Women tend to have more complex social dynamics in friendships.Shared experiences help deepen connections among individuals. Visible female leadership in churches empowers young women.Mentorship plays a significant role in young women's development.Gen Z shows intrigue in spiritual matters despite declining church affiliation.Parents should engage in curious conversations with their children.Community involvement is essential for faith retention.Encouraging young people to step out of their comfort zones fosters growth.Let’s Parent on Purpose is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcasting Network. For more information, visit www.ChristianParenting.orgBioCicely Corry is Editorial Director at Barna Group, where she leads online content strategy to help Christian leaders understand key trends affecting the Church. Previously, she managed social media strategy and content for the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association and wrote for the Christian Broadcasting Network. Cicely has served in student ministry for over 10 years, and founded Three Minute Study, an online Bible study community helping others understand, enjoy and apply God’s wordShe holds a M.A. in journalism from Regent University and a B.A. in print journalism and marketing from Hampton University. Cicely is an Atlanta native now living in Charlotte, North Carolina, with her husband and two sons.Resources mentioned:Barna site: https://www.barna.com/  Gen Z Vol. 3 Study: https://www.barna.com/gen-z-volume-3/ Barna’s Instagram Page: https://www.instagram.com/barnagroup/?hl=en  Barna Access Plus: https://www.barna.com/access/ Cicely Corry's Instagram Page: https://www.instagram.com/cicelycorry/   Join my Things for Thursday Email List and get a free Marriage Snapshot Tool and Fun Family Conversation Ebook! Support Let’s Parent on Purpose as we help families thrive through the gospel: https://letsparentonpurpose.com/support/

In this conversation, Jay and Virgil explore the concept of missional households, emphasizing the importance of experiential learning, community, and intentional practices in family life. They discuss how to create a nurturing environment for spiritual growth, the significance of regular rhythms in the household, and adapting to life changes while maintaining a missional mindset. Through personal stories and practical advice, they highlight the transformative power of faith in everyday life.TakeawaysThere's a difference between knowing about something and truly knowing it.Learning requires experience, community, and a compelling story.Discipleship is best understood as a relational network rather than individual mentorship.Deep learning occurs in community settings, not just through sermons.Intentional rhythms in the household can foster spiritual growth.Experiential learning can be integrated into family gatherings.Simplicity in practices makes them easier to maintain.Children learn through repetition and experience in their environment.Creating a missional household involves being consistent with values and practices.The narrative of a household can guide the family's mission and identity.Let’s Parent on Purpose is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcasting Network. For more information, visit www.ChristianParenting.orgBioAs the Senior Director of OneTree, Virgil is responsible for leading the team to help mission, marketplace, and ministry leaders thrive holistically, do beautifully integrated work, and become everything God dreamed them to be, believing this to be a primary means for stewarding the reviving life of God through His people into the world.Virgil holds a B.S. in Biology, an M.A. in Religion and Cross Cultural Studies, and an MEd. in Curriculum and Instruction. He is presently working on an EdD in Christian Leadership.Resources mentioned:https://www.onetreeministries.org/Join my Things for Thursday Email List and get a free Marriage Snapshot Tool and Fun Family Conversation Ebook! Support Let’s Parent on Purpose as we help families thrive through the gospel: https://letsparentonpurpose.com/support/

In this conversation, Jay and Virgil explore the importance of character development over mere skills in leadership and parenting. They discuss the need for experiential learning in faith and the role of community in nurturing youth. The conversation emphasizes that discipleship should primarily occur in the home, supported by a network of relationships that foster growth and understanding.They also discuss the importance of building significant relationships, particularly in the context of youth ministry. They explore the influence of social media on young people's lives, emphasizing the need for adults to step in and provide positive guidance. The discussion highlights the role of desire in shaping behavior and the necessity of intentional connections in youth ministry. They also address the importance of encouraging risk-taking and resilience in young people, advocating for experiential learning over theoretical knowledge. The conversation concludes with practical advice for parents on how to engage in transformative conversations with their children.TakeawaysLeaders often have more information than formation.Character is more important than skills in leadership.Experiential learning is crucial for true understanding.Discipleship must happen primarily in the home.Community plays a vital role in faith development.Youth often leave the faith due to lack of relational engagement.Knowing about something is different from truly knowing it.Parents' involvement in faith practice significantly impacts youth retention.Building a supportive network for youth is essential.Teaching faith should be experiential, communal, and narratively situated. Aim for at least seven significant adult relationships.Social media influences youth in unhealthy ways.Desire drives behavior more than cognition.Intentional connections can impact youth positively.Encouraging risk-taking helps build resilience.Experiential learning is more effective than theoretical knowledge.Transformative conversations can lead to deeper understanding.Modeling behavior is crucial for youth development.Recognizing and affirming individual strengths is important.Learning from failure is a valuable experience.Let’s Parent on Purpose is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcasting Network. For more information, visit www.ChristianParenting.orgBioAs the Senior Director of OneTree, Virgil is responsible for leading the team to help mission, marketplace, and ministry leaders thrive holistically, do beautifully integrated work, and become everything God dreamed them to be, believing this to be a primary means for stewarding the reviving life of God through His people into the world.Virgil holds a B.S. in Biology, an M.A. in Religion and Cross Cultural Studies, and an MEd. in Curriculum and Instruction. He is presently working on an EdD in Christian Leadership.Resources mentioned:https://www.onetreeministries.org/Join my Things for Thursday Email List and get a free Marriage Snapshot Tool and Fun Family Conversation Ebook! Support Let’s Parent on Purpose as we help families thrive through the gospel: https://letsparentonpurpose.com/support/

In this conversation, Jay and David discuss the evolving challenges faced by children and adolescents in today's world, particularly in the context of counseling. They explore the importance of emotional regulation, the balance between naming feelings and navigating them, and the need for parents to find a healthy middle ground in their approach to parenting. The discussion also highlights the significance of building resilience in children through healthy risks and practical strategies, such as the 'exposures and ladders' approach to overcoming anxiety. Additionally, they introduce the Daystar Dog Series, which aims to teach resilience through stories featuring therapy dogs.TakeawaysThe same child development principles apply today as in the past.Technology has significantly impacted the challenges children face.Parents may overcorrect in their approach to emotional support.Naming emotions is important, but navigating them is crucial.Resilience in children is diminishing due to overprotection.Healthy risks are essential for children's growth and development.Parents should reflect on what they do for their children that they could do themselves.Anxiety often stems from avoiding discomfort and challenges.Exposures and ladders can help children face their fears.Storytelling through the Daystar Dog Series can teach resilience.Let’s Parent on Purpose is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcasting Network. For more information, visit www.ChristianParenting.orgBioDavid Thomas, LMSW, is co-executive director of Daystar Counseling in Nashville, Tennessee, and the author of 10 books including his most recent book, Raising Emotionally Strong Boys (Bethany, June 2022). A frequent media guest and speaker, David has spoken to hundreds of thousands in person and millions via his Top 10 kids & family podcast, Raising Boys and Girls, now with more than 10 million downloads since its launch in 2018. Learn more at RaisingBoysAndGirls.com.Resources mentioned:Raising Boys and Girls websiteJoin my Things for Thursday Email List and get a free Marriage Snapshot Tool and Fun Family Conversation Ebook! Support Let’s Parent on Purpose as we help families thrive through the gospel

In this episode, Jay Holland discusses the often-overlooked practice of fasting within the Christian faith. He shares personal reflections on his struggles with fasting, its biblical foundations, and the spiritual benefits it can bring to one's life, marriage, and parenting. Jay emphasizes the importance of humility and submission to God through fasting, encouraging listeners to consider making it a regular part of their spiritual journey.TakeawaysFasting is a practice that can lead to spiritual breakthroughs.Jesus expected his followers to fast, just as they pray and give.Fasting is often under-taught and under-practiced in the Christian community.Fasting can help with clarity in decision-making and spiritual direction.The act of fasting cultivates humility and dependence on God.Fasting can aid in repentance and soften one's heart.Fasting is a way to tame the flesh and resist temptation.Fasting is not about manipulating God but seeking His will earnestly.Regular fasting can lead to a deeper relationship with God.Fasting should be approached with a heart of humility and submission.Let’s Parent on Purpose is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcasting Network. For more information, visit www.ChristianParenting.orgResources mentioned:Join my Things for Thursday Email List and get a free Marriage Snapshot Tool and Fun Family Conversation Ebook! Support Let’s Parent on Purpose as we help families thrive through the gospel: https://letsparentonpurpose.com/support/