Make Life Less Difficult

My guest today is Noel Bulger. Before I tell you more about Noel, I want to take a moment to recognize this as the 100th episode of the Make Life Less Difficult podcast!  This is an exciting and humbling milestone to reach.  What started as an experiment has developed into an amazing journey of connection, growth, learning, and deep gratitude. Occasionally someone will ask me what my favorite episode is so far.  And I’m honestly at a loss… I cannot name a favorite or even 3 favorites, because every single conversation, every single guest is so beautiful and amazing to me.  I feel a deep sense of honor to host these stories, quite a few of which haven’t been shared publicly before.  I am energized and rejuvenated by the connection and conversations.  Thank you to all who have been guests, to those who are upcoming, and to those who are yet to commit, but are considering!   I love that as I publish the 100th episode, my list of guests is growing longer, my energy and enthusiasm as the host is deepening, and my conviction in the power of stories, sharing our journeys, making a difference through this sharing just gets stronger and stronger and stronger. Thank you for being part of this journey – whether you are listening for the first time, or you’ve listened 100 times – thank you!  I’m very much looking forward to the next 100!! And now, let me share a few things about Noel before we get into our conversation. Noel grew up in Ireland and moved to the United States at age 18.  He joined the Marine Corps as an officer and spent 9 years leading high performance teams globally in both combat and diplomatic roles.   Major life transitions, including the loss of his son, made him realize he was more interested in working to design a better future than defend an imperfect present.  He left the Marines, went to business school, and transitioned into the startup world to work more directly in social innovation and creating the next generation of inclusive leaders. Noel then found his way to leadership coaching and consulting and works with organization and leaders around the globe to develop the skills of leadership, communication, strategy creation, and culture transformation. Noel has degrees from Georgetown and Stanford Universities, Thomas Aquinas College, and the Marine Corps University.  He has been awarded medals of commendation and achievement from both the Navy and the Marine Corps. Noel and I met through a work collaboration and I immediately knew he had some incredible stories to share.  It’s an honor to share this conversation with you today. Noel, thank you for sharing these glimpses into your journey.  Thank you for your reflections, thoughtful questions, and wise insights from the experiences life has brought you.  Connect with Noel: LinkedIn Email: noel@thegalantacompany.comMake Life Less Difficult~ Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Lieutenant Colonel Tony Cerella. Tony was born in Texas, raised in Colorado, Germany, and Virginia, and currently lives in Como, Italy.   Tony graduated from the Virginia Military Institute in 2000, after which he was commissioned as an Army officer and later transitioned to the Ordnance Corps.  He swore he would serve just for 4 years and be done.  Twenty-three years later, time that included multiple tours to Iraq, and service in Australia, Germany, Italy, South Korea, and the United States, he’s now about to retire from the Army. Along the way, Tony’s military education included the Armor Officer Basic Course, the Combined Logistics Captains Career Course, and the Command and General Staff College.  Along with that, he holds a Masters in International Political Economy of Resources from the Colorado School of Mines and a Doctorate of Education in Organizational Change and Leadership from the University of Southern California. Tony’s resume includes a long list of accomplishments during his career and almost a dozen military awards including the Bronze Star Medal, the Meritorious Service Medal, and many others.  Tony is married to Bethany and they have fourteen-year-old twins.  He enjoys reading, running, and traveling. I first met Tony through our mutual friend, Russ Watts, who has been on the podcast episodes 4, 26, 45.  We connected through the shared interest in the power of storytelling.  I’m so grateful that Tony agreed to share pieces of his story here, especially during a time of preparing for a major life transition – retiring from the army after 23 years.  In our conversation, he courageously shares his reflections, his questions, his concerns.  What will life look like after retirement from a career that came with quite a structured lifestyle and in a way, a built-in community.   Tony shares glimpses into his journey of personal growth and development, learning to take care of himself, addressing combat trauma, and uncovering ways to make major transitions less difficult. Tony, thank you for this conversation.  Thank you for sharing these insights into your life, thank you for sharing the wisdom you’ve gained, and thank you for your candidness as you continue to sort out this major transition that is before you.Connect with Tony:LinkedInWebsiteMake Life Less Difficult~ Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Charmetra Guess, better known as Meme. Meme is a scientist turned content creator and the mother of an amazing teenage daughter (wait until you hear Meme talk about her daughter – it’s beautiful and inspirational!).  She has loved science since very early in life, as it gave her consistency as she moved around the world as the daughter in a US military family.  (You’ll love the story of her stealing biology textbooks!) I had the privilege of getting connected with Meme through Shannon Cochran-Yzquierdo, my guest on episodes 13 and 79.  Shannon was excited to connect me to a member of her FRamily (listen to episode 13 if you aren’t familiar with “FRamily”!) And, as it turns out, the connection with Meme has been gold! Meme is the creator of Suki’s Honey Do Project, a podcast that focuses on connecting list makers with action, hoping we all can check off something along the way.  I highly recommend the podcast but be forewarned – it WILL motivate you!!!  The stories are inspiring and if you have been waiting to try something new, learn a new sport, start that hobby you wanted to do as a kid but never had the chance, this is your spot for inspiration! Meme has an amazing sense of humor, a relentless determination, an ability to make friends everywhere she goes (yes, she is that person on your flight), and a deep well of grace that she extends to people in ways that will amaze you. Her commitment to spreading light, love, and kindness is unmatched. Meme, thank you for the amazing magic you bring into the world.  Thank you for sharing these pieces of your journey today.  Thank you for inspiring us through your podcast and your life. Click the link below,  to check it out and follow Suki’s Honey Do Project on your favorite podcast platform! https://linktr.ee/sukishoneydoprojectMake Life Less Difficult~ Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Becky Tibbitts.  Becky is a professional certified coach with a passion for mental fitness which leads to 10x productivity, joy-filled connected relationships, and overall life satisfaction.  She helps professionals avoid energy drains that can lead to burnout.  She helps them create time and financial freedom, and also to experience more joy in life and work.  Becky’s clients say she is the spark that helped them step into their inner superpower to experience true freedom and lasting joy!   Becky takes a stand for Women's Empowerment and freedom and supports organizations that combat sex trafficking locally and globally. Becky lives in Oregon with her husband and a blended family of six children.  In her free time, she loves to read and listen to music.  As a family, they enjoy trailer camping, floating in the river, vacationing at the beach, and snowmobiling.   In our conversation today, Becky shares pieces of her journey, realizing she wanted a life different than the one she grew up in, maneuvering through challenging relationships, making decisions that were best for her despite the judgment of others, and finding that deep sense of joy inside herself – and learning to keep it present!  Some of the themes we discuss include the importance of boundaries, as well as the courage it takes to identify and set boundaries. We also talk about mental fitness, which is Becky’s passion, and she shares what that means, how she keeps herself mentally fit, and how she helps others develop their mental fitness. Becky, thank you so much for sharing these pieces of your story, for the glimpses into the hard work you have done to develop yourself and your relationships, and for the wisdom you share throughout our conversation and in your everyday work. You can find links to learn more about Becky and how to connect with her below:WebsiteLinkedInEmail: becky@InspireDevelopmentCoaching.comSchedule a call with Becky hereMake Life Less Difficult~ Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Valerie Brown. VALERIE BROWN is a Buddhist-Quaker Dharma teacher, facilitator, and executive coach. A former lawyer and lobbyist, she is a co-director of Georgetown’s Institute for Transformational Leadership as well as founder and chief mindfulness officer of Lead Smart Coaching.  She is an ordained Buddhist Dharma teacher in the Plum Village tradition, founded by Thich Nhat Hanh, and is a certified Kundalini yoga teacher. In her leadership development and mindfulness practice, she focuses on diversity, social equity, and inclusion.  Valerie is an award-winning author whose books include The Road That Teaches and The Mindful School Leader with Kirsten Olson. She holds a juris doctor from Howard University School of Law, a Master of Arts from Miami University (Ohio), and a bachelor of arts from City University of New York. Valerie tends a lively perennial home garden in New Hope, Pennsylvania. Valerie’s most recent book is Hope Leans Forward, Braving your way toward simplicity, awakening, and peace. In this book, Valerie beautifully blends pieces of her own journey, including many aches, pains, losses, and challenges with stories from other inspiring people, including Susan Cross, George Lakey, LoAn Nguygen, Fanny Brewster, and more. The thread: Hope, courage, and fear.  Now, that’s my summary of the thread that runs through this book, so you’ll have to read it and see what threads appear for you, as there are many. For me, something that stood out is the fact that just about every story wove together hope, courage, bravery, and fear.  Sometimes we look at other people and see them doing things that amaze us and we think, “I could never do that.  I’d be too afraid.”   And here’s the thing, courageous and brave people also have fear.  And they go forward anyway.  In the book, Valerie quotes Margaret Wheatley, from her essay, “The Place beyond Fee and Hope,” where she says, “Hope never enters the room without fear at its side.” This conversation with Valerie is a bit briefer than other conversations on Make Life Less Difficult, due to some uncontrollable circumstances, but it’s nonetheless real, impactful, and inspiring. Valerie, thank you for the work you do in the world, the light you share, the inspiration you live. Find more of Valerie’s work and offerings:WebsiteLinkedInBooks by Valerie Brown Make Life Less Difficult~ Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Chris Thyberg. It’s a pleasure to have Chris back on the show after our first conversation on episode 44.  Chris is the founder and principal of The Serving Way, a leadership coaching practice dedicated to partnering with experienced and emerging leaders in all sectors as they pursue great purposes for results that really matter. It is his calling and privilege to journey alongside clients as they develop new capacities to achieve exceptional performance and transformative action. Chris has been traveling the serving way of leadership for more than 35 years as a senior executive, a team builder, a facilitator, and an executive leadership coach.  Chris lives in Pittsburgh with his wife, Leslie. They love to eat Leslie’s amazing cooking, laugh a lot, travel, and hang out with their grown kids and partners who all live nearby. No grandkids … yet … but four furry grand-dogs to look after when needed. In our conversation today, Chris talks about The Art of Beginning Again.   Sometimes this idea of the art of beginning again is in relation to starting something significant – a job, moving to somewhere new, a new career.  Sometimes, getting out of bed in the morning is a challenge and we can apply this idea of the art of beginning again to the mundane acts of daily life. If you’ve ever felt self-doubt, been stressed about changes and transitions and transformations, put pressure on yourself to get things right on the first try, I think you’ll appreciate this perspective of always being a beginning and always beginning. There’s a lot of grace and compassion and spaciousness in the wisdom Chris shares today. Thank you, Chris, for coming back, for sharing more of your journey, and for encouraging us all to adopt this practice of beginning again and again and again and again…. Poem shared by Chris: For a new beginning by John O'DonohueConnect with Chris: LinkedInWebsite  Make Life Less Difficult~ Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

Lisa shares her reflections on the year ahead along with her word of the year: Focus.In this episode, Lisa refers to the article, For better health this year, keep it simple, from the Washington Post.Please feel free to reach out if you are interested in sharing your story on the Make Life Less Difficult podcast in 2023!Email Lisa: lisa@makelifelessdifficult.comMake Life Less Difficult~ Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

Lisa shares how she finishes out the year with these three reflections:1. What am I proud of from the past year?2. What are my regrets?3. Recommit to Progress not Perfection Thanks for all the support and love during 2022! It’s been an amazing journey and we are looking forward to 2023!!!Make Life Less Difficult~ Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Cameron Smoak.Cameron is an executive coach and a respected trainer and facilitator of leadership workshops around the world for companies in multiple industries.  Cameron has degrees from Yale University, Oxford, and Harvard.  He combines experience from being a manager at McKinsey & Co with his masters in psychology to support his clients in the results they are seeking.Cameron grew up in rural southeast United States but has lived in Italy for over 2 decades.  He shares pieces of his journey that took him from the farm country of Georgia to being an Italian citizen.Cameron and I met through Russ Watts who has been on the podcast several times.  I joined a team of coached from around the world that Cameron and his business partner were pulling together for providing leadership coaching and workshops to a global clientele.Before we delve into Cameron’s story and journey, I want to mention that we recorded this conversation in late November.   Part of his journey that he shares is about coming out as gay with his family.  Cameron comments  that he feels like his story is mundane and not really unique to which I push back because unfortunately far too many in the LGBTQ+ community do not have support from their families when they come out to them.  Between the recording of this conversation and the release of it today, the tragic shooting occurring in Colorado Springs at Club Q, an LGBTQ nightclub.  5 people were killed and 25 injured in this tragic and senseless attack.The world cup is being played in Qatar, a country where same sex relationships are illegal.  While there is progress in some parts of the world, there’s still so many places around the globe that it’s not safe for the LGBTQ+ community. It is my hope that by sharing stories like Cameron’s hearts and minds would be transformed around the world. Judging others limits and shuts off our connection.  Listening and learning from each other expands our curiosity, builds understanding and connection, and opens the doors for true acceptance. If you or someone you know is struggling with their coming out journey, here are some resources for support and encouragement.    Resources:·       The Trevor Project: 24/7/365 support in the US·       Trevor Space: International Digital Support Community for LGBTQ+ young people·       Befrienders Worldwide: Find a helpline by Country·       Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays: PFLAG.org·       Suicide Hotlines by Country·       It Gets Better Project:  The It Gets Better Project inspires people across the globe to share their stories and remind the next generation of LGBTQ+ youth that hope is out there, and it will get better.·       Human Rights Campaign·        Sage USA: Advocacy for LGBT Elders·        Matthew Shepard FoundatiMake Life Less Difficult~ Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Brigi Perez. Brigi is a Digital Business Manager.  She supports heart-centered and Highly Sensitive entrepreneurs tame the overwhelm of organizing their business processes by setting up smart databases and systems in Notion so that the entrepreneurs can focus on what they do best – working with and for their clients! Brigi is one of the most organized people I know! She’s always been passionate about organization, systems and structure.  In her 30’s she found her dream job with one of the biggest multinational companies in Hungary and started her career as an Executive Assistant to the CEO.  From there she moved on to Office Management.  She worked with a variety of companies in similar roles and loved the challenges each opportunity provided.   She now provides support via Digital Business Management and serves clients around the globe. Brigi and I first met in 2012, in Manila, Philippines.  It was John and my’s first international move and assignment with the State Department and Brigi and her husband Hector were the first people we met when we arrived in country.  Serving as our social sponsors, they provided us with a warm welcome and guidance to figuring out so many things in those first moments and weeks.  I remember feeling so grateful to have Brigi to turn to and ask my questions… she had already lived there for a year and had figured out SO much!! It has been a privilege to stay connected over the years, meeting up in random countries like Bahrain and Germany!  Brigi has also worked with my company, The REI Concierge, when she was doing work as a VA. Her organization and systems management were an enormous support to us as our business began to grow.  In today’s conversation, Brigi shares about her journey of discovering she is a Highly Sensitive Person, or HSP.  She is now passionate about serving HSPs who are entrepreneurs.  For highly sensitive persons, it can be incredibly helpful to know why systems and processes that work for others just don’t work for them.  Finding one’s unique path forward is essential, rather than exhausting oneself trying to fit into boxes that just don’t work! Brigi, thank you for sharing these pieces of your journey.  Thank you for your passion in helping others understand HSPs, and for serving these entrepreneurs who are doing brilliant work in the world.   There are several resources that we’ve linked in the show notes to provide additional information on Highly Sensitive Persons and better understanding how to find congruence in a world that often feels like it doesn’t fit.Resources:Connect with Brigi - WebsiteMore about BrigiLinks to books (Pivot, HSPs, and more)Are you an HSP?  Find out here with this online questionnaire.Documentary: SensitiveMake Life Less Difficult~ Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra