The Waves: Gender, Relationships, Feminism

This week’s episode of The Waves considers whether there is a uniquely feminist way to divorce your skeevy rich husband. Slate executive producer of podcasts, Alicia Montgomery, and business journalist and co-host of Slate Money, Emily Peck, delve into the stories of two billionaire women who have both recently ended their marriages—Melinda French Gates and MacKenzie Scott. The two discuss whether French Gates and Scott bear any responsibility for the sins of their ex-husbands companies. They talk about the extent to which each woman worked to rehabilitate their partner’s image during their marriage, including unpacking French Gates’ obsession with telling the story of how she convinced her husband to drive their daughter to school (some of the time, at least). Alicia and Emily also talk about whether there’s an expectation, just because they are women, that Scott and French Gates use the billions of dollars their husbands have amassed to better the world. And finally, they talk about how Gen Xers were taught to think about marriage and happy endings, and what we’ve learned about fairy tales. In Slate Plus, Alicia and Emily talk about their gateways into feminism. For Alicia, it was a 1980’s romantic comedy from across the pond. For Emily, it was learning about what a hellscape maternity leave policies can be.RecommendationsFun fact: Emily is very interested in cults. If you want a deep dive into the Heaven’s Gate cult from the 1970s, she recommends the Pineapple Media podcast, Heaven’s Gate.Did you develop a bad habit during the pandemic? Alicia recommends kicking those habits we adopted to stay sane during lockdown. She’ll be slowly cancelling all the streaming services she subscribed to because there are only so many times you can watch The Crown. (Probably.)Podcast production by Cheyna Roth with editorial oversight by Susan Matthews and June Thomas. And additional production assistance from Rosemary Belson. Send your comments and recommendations on what to cover to thewaves@slate.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this week’s episode of The Waves, Slate senior writer and host of Outward Christina Cauterucci and Julia Craven, Slate staff writer covering race, politics, and health disparities, talk about one woman: Kyrsten Sinema. From her wardrobe to her position on the filibuster, Sinema has been in the news a lot recently. The hosts talk about the Arizona senator’s political evolution—she moved from the Green Party to run as a progressive Democrat, but when she got to the U.S. Senate, she tacked toward the center—and whether she is currently exhibiting any signs of political coherence. Christina unpacks the high note of Sinema at the Capitol: her wardrobe, noting that the flashy fashions that once brought visual interest to the normally drab walls of Congress have taken a turn for the worse. As Sinema started to stymie Democratic plans, her “fuck off” ring and “dangerous creature” sweater took on a whole new meaning.After the break, Julia and Christina dive deep into the filibuster. While standing in the way of the Democrats’ ability to pass almost any legislation at all, Sinema has spouted inaccurate narratives of how the filibuster came into being. Julia and Christina talk about her earlier vote for John Lewis as House leader, and try to square that with her current position, which is holding up voting-rights legislation. But Sinema doesn’t seem to be listening to most of the criticism she’s getting for her position, instead dismissing parts of it as merely sexist. For Slate Plus members, Julia and Christina continue our new segment, Gateway Feminism, where they talk about one thing that helped make them feminists. For Julia, it’s her great-grandmother and her enduring belief that Julia could become anything she set her mind to. Christina started her career as a feminist when she revamped her co-ed soccar team jersey in protest of the team name: The Molar Men. RecommendationsChristina recommends celebrating Pride Month by educating yourself about queer politics. She suggests watching a conversation between Amy Walter and Sasha Issenberg hosted by Politics and Prose. Julia finally finished reading her first book in almost a year! She finished The Vanishing Half, by Brit Bennett, and highly recommends finishing books. But Julia holds zero judgment on wherever you are at in your reading journey.  Podcast production by Cheyna Roth with editorial oversight by Susan Matthews and June Thomas. Additional production assistance by Rosemary Belson.Send your comments and recommendations on what to cover to thewaves@slate.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this week’s episode of The Waves, Slate senior editor Allegra Frank and Robin Boylorn, a professor at the University of Alabama and occasional Slate contributor, discuss the enduring appeal of Keeping Up With the Kardashians as the E! reality show it comes to a close at the end of its 20th season. The pair digs into the show as a backdrop for the creation of a family dynasty of internet celebrity, track the diminishing role of television in their multi-billion-dollar empire, and parse out the curious appeal of the sisters who became famous just for being famous. After the break, Allegra and Robin dig deep on the Kardashian-Jenner clan’s history of appropriation of Black culture, and discuss the impact of their adopting working-class Black aesthetics to great personal gain as several of them became mothers to Black children themselves. The sisters haven’t shied away from airing their learning moments for the world to see. But have they been able to use their enormous platform to any meaningful end? For Slate Plus members, Allegra and Robin continue our new segment, Gateway Feminism, where they talk about one thing that helped make them feminists. For Allegra, it’s the manga and anime series Cardcaptor Sakura, and for Robin it’s her favorite Toni Morrison novel and feminist blueprint, Sula. RecommendationsAllegra recommends a new EP, Whole Damn Body from Los Campesinos! Robin thinks you should check out the Crunk Feminist Collective’s new newsletter, The Remix.Podcast production by Asha Saluja filling in for Cheyna Roth. Editorial oversight by Susan Matthews and June Thomas. Additional production help from Rosemary Belson. Send your comments and thoughts about what The Waves should cover to thewaves@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this week’s episode of The Waves, Slate Senior Editor Allegra Frank and Slate Production Assistant Madeline Ducharme talk about the latest season of Netflix’s Master of None. The pair digs into the show’s depiction of a queer Black relationship and breakup, and discusses if the show even a comedy anymore. Also: how are we supposed to care about a relationship when we first see it at its end?After the break, Allegra and Madeline go outside of the show to talk about Season 3’s creators, Aziz Ansari and Lena Waithe. Ansari and Waithe have both stirred controversy in the past few years. At the height of the #MeToo movement, a now shuttered site called Babe.net reported an alleged unpleasant sexual encounter between a 22-year-old woman and Ansari. In response, Ansari stepped out of the spotlight for a couple years, though he said at the time that the encounter was consensual. Meanwhile, Waithe has worked on several projects, including 2019’s Queen and Slim and Amazon’s Them, that have been accused of propagating needlessly cruel Black violence on-screen. Allegra and Madeline discuss what we’re supposed to do with accusations and situations like this, particularly once the dust has settled. For Slate Plus members, Allegra and Madeline kick off our new segment, Gateway Feminism. They talk about one thing that helped make them feminists. For Allegra, it’s those sugar and spice cartoons, the Powerpuff Girls, while Madeline was heavily influenced by 2010s Tumblr.RecommendationsAllegra recommends a seasonal favorite - S’mores flavored Oreos. Madeline thinks you should pick up Kristen Arnett’s second novel, With Teeth. Podcast production by Cheyna Roth with editorial oversight by Susan Matthews and June Thomas. Additional production help from Rosemary Belson. Send your comments and thoughts about what The Waves should cover to thewaves@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this week’s episode of The Waves, Slate senior writer and Outward podcast co-host Christina Cauterucci talks to Robin Marty about the Supreme Court’s plans with Roe v. Wade, and what women can do to prepare for the worst. Robin Marty is the author of The New Handbook for a Post-Roe America. She’s also the communications director of the West Alabama Women’s Center and the Yellowhammer Fund, which provides funding and logistical support to women in need of abortions. They discuss what abortion access might look like if the justices further erode Roe. They also talk about why Robin once said she was ready for the Supreme Court to overturn Roe, and why national exhaustion has caused her to change her mind.In the second half of the show, it’s all about survival. Christina and Robin focus on the ways women will (hopefully) still be able to get access to reproductive health care, why self-managed abortions could become crucial, how privacy will take on increasing importance, and how people can help. Plus, they’ll tell you how you should decide when it’s time to “break some laws and do some bad stuff.”Recommendations:Christina recommends Tevas, specifically the Hurricane Drift sandals. “It literally feels like you’re wearing clouds on your feet.”Robin recommends Meg Elison’s “The Road to Nowhere” series, which starts with The Book of the Unnamed Midwife, then The Book of Etta, and finally the The Book of Flora. The books focus on a post-apocalyptic landscape after a fever has swept the earth, killing women and children and making childbirth very dangerous. In the series, women try to survive while helping others prevent pregnancies and births. Robin calls it a “breathtaking series that I absolutely love.”Podcast production by Cheyna Roth with editorial oversight by Susan Matthews and June Thomas. Additional production help by Rosemary Belson. Send your comments and recommendations on what to cover to thewaves@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Blake Bailey gained fame for telling the stories of famous men. But before that, he was a beloved middle school teacher—who went on to have questionable sexual relationships with several of his former eighth grade students. When his biography of Phillip Roth was published this spring, some former students started to speak out about their experiences with Bailey. A few revealed that after years of staying in touch with them as a mentor of sorts, he had made unwelcome sexual advances. Former student Eve Crawford Payton says he raped her when she was 22 years old.On today’s episode, Slate news director Susan Matthews is first joined by colleagues Josh Levin and Molly Olmstead, who were her collaborators on “Mr. Bailey’s Class.” They unpack what it was like to work on the piece, which stories about sexual assault get told, and what that means for journalism as a mechanism for obtaining justice.Later in the show, Matthews is joined by Eve Crawford Peyton. Peyton wrote an essay for Slate, detailing her experiences with Bailey, including the alleged rape. She talks to Susan about what her life has been like in the aftermath of the Bailey revelations and her struggle to juggle her conflicting emotions about her former mentor.     We’re so excited that the Waves is back as a place to have these important conversations. Going forward, each week on The Waves, a different pair of hosts will talk about one big thing that’s on their minds. But this week, we needed to break the brand-new format. Podcast production by Cheyna Roth, with editorial oversight by Susan Matthews and June Thomas.  Send feedback and recommendations on what The Waves should cover to thewaves@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Waves has been gone for a while, but we’re coming back soon ... with a few changes.Every week, two hosts will chat about a topic they just can’t stop thinking about. Whether it’s pop culture, politics, sports, or family, if you’re thinking about it, we’ll be talking about it—and we’ll try to figure out what gender has to do with it, too.The Waves will be coming to you every Thursday starting this week on May 20th, wherever you get your podcasts. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

For The Wave’s final episode before a temporary but indefinite hiatus, Christina, June, Marcia, and Nichole have a coronavirus check-in and talk about inequalities amplified by the pandemic. They also review Feel Good, a semi-autobiographical series on Netflix from comedian Mae Martin. Finally, the panel discusses who they want Joe Biden to select as his running mate, who they think he should pick, and who they think he will choose.   In Slate Plus: Is it sexist that liquor stores are considered essential businesses, if excessive alcohol consumption is linked to domestic abuse and reports of domestic violence have increased since many people are staying at home?Slate Plus members get a bonus segment on The Waves each week, and no ads. Sign up now to listen and support our work.Other Items Discussed: Stop Trying to Be Productive by Taylor LorenzSitting on the Couch Is My New Favorite Hobby by Josh GondelmanThe Trapped-at-Home Mother by Emily Gould The “All-Consuming” Emotional Labor Caused by Coronavirus—and Shouldered by Women by Andrea Flynn How Coronavirus Is Affecting Surrogacy, Foster Care and Adoption by David DodgeRecommendations:Nichole: Bestiary: Poems by Donika Kelly  Marcia: A Field Guide to American Houses (Revised): The Definitive Guide to Identifying and Understanding America's Domestic Architecture by Virginia Savage McAlester.  June: Tommy, the CBS police procedural.  Christina: Cats, yes - that Cats. The 2019 movie adaptation of the famous Andrew Lloyd Webber musical. Send your comments and recommendations on what to cover to thewaves@slate.com.Podcast production by Rosemary Belson. Production assistance by Cleo Levin. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this week’s episode of the Waves, Christina, June, Marcia, and Nichole talk to Emily Oster about pregnant women choosing to give birth at home instead of going to hospitals during the pandemic. They also discuss parenting visibility and additional labor while working from home. Then, they review FX’s new show Mrs. America, the story of the Equal Rights Amendment (ERA) and the countermovement headed by Phyllis Schlafly. Finally, the panel discusses the sexual assault allegations against Joe Biden.In Slate Plus: Is the treatment of coronavirus task force member Dr. Deborah Birx sexist?Slate Plus members get a bonus segment on The Waves each week, and no ads. Sign up now to listen and support our work.Other Items Discussed: “For Pregnant Women Who Are Scared of Hospitals Right Now, Is Switching to Home Birth Better?” by Emily Oster. “Biden accuser Tara Reade: "I wanted to be a senator; I didn't want to sleep with one"” by Katie Halper. “Has Deborah Birx Crossed the Line?” by Tim Murphy. Recommendations:Marcia: Chisholm '72: Unbought & Unbossed, the historical documentary about Shirley Chisholm’s campaign for the Democratic Party presidential nomination.  June: The BBC podcast, Natalie Haynes Stands Up for the Classics. Christina: Learning to cut hair and investing in a good pair of clippers.  Nichole: Fiction DB, a database that allows users to search for fiction by subject, genres, subgenres, author, title, ect. Plus, once you’ve located the title, order the book through a local independent bookstore. Send your comments and recommendations on what to cover to thewaves@slate.com.Podcast production by Rosemary Belson. Production assistance by Cleo Levin. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this week’s episode of the Waves, Christina, June, Marcia, and Nichole discuss being cooped up at home during coronavirus. Then, they review the new Hulu show Little Fires Everywhere, based on the 2017 novel by Celeste Ng. Finally, the panel discusses Sarah Viren’s New York Times Magazine piece “The Accusations Were Lies. But Could We Prove It?”In Slate Plus: Is it sexist to tell a woman she’s “really blossomed” since getting divorced? Slate Plus members get a bonus segment on The Waves each week, and no ads. Sign up now to listen and support our work.Other items discussed on the show:“How to WFH With Your Partner Without Killing Each Other,” by Christina Cauterucci in Slate.“Life Inside the Title IX Pressure Cooker,” by Sarah Brown in the Chronicle of Higher Education.Radiooooo, a site where you can listen to music from different decades. Recommendations:Marcia: “Advice From a Prepper Mom on Surviving the Unthinkable,” by Mira Ptacin. June: The Arne & Carlos Daily Quarantine Knitting Podcast. Christina: Flour Water Salt Yeast: The Fundamentals of Artisan Bread and Pizza by Ken Forkish. Nichole: The Screen Time feature on your phone. Send your comments and recommendations on what to cover to thewaves@slate.com.Podcast production by Rosemary Belson. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices