Good Children

You walk into a Long Island catering hall, there’s fried calamari, wyd? Celebrate our Sweet 16 with a look back on some of our more memorable Sweet 16 experiences, a polite conversation about Debby Ryan, and an emotional candle ceremony celebrating all of our favorite people. An introspective journey into the psyche of “LMFAO,” an inspiring call to action to bring back Bump Its, and the mortifying ordeal of being watched at a wedding. It’s a celebration fit for Good Children and YOU’RE invited.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Susan Boyle, Balloon Boy, Joe’s wart doctor… the stars align on this very nostalgic episode of Good Children! Andrew and Joe talk headlines and trends that had them glued to their TVs and abusing frozen yogurt topping bars. BeReal about chasing your dreams, negotiate the terms of your laundry service, finalize your Whale Rep application, and journey Into The Vault for more classic videos from the archive!  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

OK sooooo this episode is about sports but not in a way that you will be bored/triggered/scared of. Joe and Andrew expose the seedy underbelly of sports through locker room trauma, halftime performances, Taylor Swift’s next album, and a weirdly sentimental speech on self love. Strap up your shin guards, put on your jockstrap, and get start praying for rain, because it’s time to play ball! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It’s another year around the sun for Joe! Celebrate the old fashioned way with nearly losing your life at a gymnastics party, exploring repressed middle school homophobia, technical difficulties and a fondant cake. Joe and Andrew talk birthdays then and now— and invite you along to the extravagantly themed party of your dreams!  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Life’s a stage and Joe and Andrew will do anything it takes to get into the spotlight. The Good Children vault is officially opened in this retrospect of life’s greatest performances. Andrew and Joe react to childhood videos, unpack movie theater trauma, and wonder what life would be like if they took a page from Troy Bolton’s playbook and pursued musical theater in high school.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Wake up at 3am and get on your way to a traumatic flight to nowhere with Joe and Andrew. This week, the boys talk all things travel (and toilets). Fasten your seatbelts, stow all carry-ons under the seat in front of you, and don't forget to check in on your straight (gay) boyfriends as they explore the world of PrEP and Grindr. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Take a trip to the doctors office with Andrew and Joe. In this week's GOOD CHILDREN, the duo talks all things growing: from getting weighed in to getting checked out. You'll be instantly transported back to 7th grade health class, taken to a Pride party under a bridge in Williamsburg, and demand legal retribution for the cultural impact of Nicole Scherzinger.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this very special travel episode of Good Children, Andrew and Joe take you abroad to the streets of Italy, where their lives have been forever changed by the Roman lifestyle. A discussion on Michelangelo's body dysmorphia, a revelation about toilet paper, and an honest look at American idealism. These good kids cover it all and more.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In quite possibly the darkest episode to date, Joe and Andrew discuss the chilling experiences that filled their summer breaks. A glimpse into the psyche of two emotionally disturbed Spanx for Men-wearing camp counselors, a retrospective look at the Cold Stone Industrial Complex, a dip in the pool, a trip to the spa, and a hopeful glance forward into summers unwritten. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The truth comes out in the latest installment of GOOD CHILDREN. Andrew and Joe discuss the absolutely insane tall tales they've told over the years and get to the psychological root of why so many gays lean towards lying. From buying likes on Instagram to buying stock in an energy drink pyramid scheme, these Chatty Kathies leave no stone unturned in their proverbial pet cemetery of childhood stories.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices