Restored: Helping Children of Divorce

If there was a technique used by Special Operators (Navy SEALs, Rangers, Special Forces, etc), firefighters, paramedics, and high performing athletes to stay calm during stressful situations, think clearly, make the right decisions, and avoid overwhelm, would you want to know it? That’s what you’re going to learn in this episode from a firefighter and paramedic.Find a counselor, coach, or spiritual directorShownotes

In this episode, you'll hear six short highlight clips from the podcast in 2022. This episode, and the podcast as a whole, will help you heal and grow from the trauma of your parents’ divorce, separation, or broken marriage, so you can feel whole again and break the cycle of dysfunction and divorce in your own life. If you’re new to the podcast, this is the perfect way to sample our content and learn how it will help you. If you’re a longtime listener, this is the perfect episode to share with someone you know who needs to hear it.Thanks for listening! We do it for you.Restored’s WebsiteShownotes

If you’re a woman with divorced or separated parents, have you struggled a lot in your relationships? If you’re married, has marriage felt extra difficult for you? If so, you’re not alone. That’s actually common as our guest today shares.In this episode, we discuss the struggles that daughters of divorce face in marriage that daughters of intact families typically never have to deal with and more: How you’re not doomed to repeat your parents’ mistakes Stories of marriages in crisis that turned things aroundTips for women from broken families on building a good and beautiful marriageAdvice for any parents in really difficult marriagesWomen Made New, a new book on healing for women that features a chapter on marriage for daughters of divorce Buy Women Made NewGet Free Chapters or Buy It’s Not Your FaultGet the Free Guide: 7 Tips to Build a Thriving & Divorce-Proof MarriageShownotes

Have you rejected God? Do you really struggle in your relationship with him? If you’re from a broken family and that’s true, you’re not strange. In fact, it’s really common.Why? From a young age, our parents represent God to us. If their example wasn’t good, it leaves us with a distorted image of God. As a result, we reject him or struggle extra in our relationship with him. We discuss that and more:How Sr. Miriam began drinking at age 12 and became an alcoholic as a D1 athlete3 common barriers that prevent you from healingTough questions like, “Why would God allow our families to fall apart?” and “Why doesn’t God make his love more obvious?”Buy Sr. Miriam’s Book: Behold: A Guided Advent Journal for Prayer and MeditationBuy Joey’s Book: It’s Not Your Fault: A Practical Guide to Navigating the Pain and Problems from Your Parents’ DivorceShownotes

If you’re from a broken family, you don’t need anyone to tell you how stressful, depressing, or just plain difficult the holidays can be. If you can relate, this episode is for you.In it, we offer:3 steps to plan the holidays, so you can reduce the drama and actually enjoy themAdvice from a former trauma therapist on how to deal with your difficult emotions this time of the year, so they don’t control you and you don’t act out in unhealthy waysResources to help you cope, heal, and grow from the trauma of your broken familyApply for coaching with Margaret Join Restored’s communityShownotes10 QuestionsWhen will you spend time with each parent, if possible?Who can you ask to be your swim buddy?What three things should you do to take care of yourself?What healthy distractions can you use in intense situations?What predictable circumstances will come up and what can you say or do in them?What expectations and boundaries need to be set?If you can’t be with your family, what can you do to experience some sort of community instead of your family? When and how will you communicate the plan?What can you say to lead with your intention?What’s your plan to respond if mom or dad gets upset?

Imagine you have all the success, pleasure, money, and excitement you could want. But instead of being happy, you feel unhappy and empty. What would you do?That was the story of our guest today. The wounds from his broken family were at the core of his need to live a life of extreme pleasure, excitement, and ultimately, unhappiness. But that all began to change when the 2016 US presidential election caused him to question everything. In time, he went from partying with billionaire Silicon Valley entrepreneurs to living a very different life.In this episode, you’ll hear his story and also:How he didn’t even recognize that he was trying to fill an endless holeHow the lack of an example in how to form healthy relationships inhibited is ability to do so and caused a lot of turmoil in his relationshipsHow transforming himself led him to his beautiful soon-to-be bride and authentic happinessGet the free chapters or buy the book: It’s Not Your Fault: A Practical Guide to Navigating the Pain and Problems from Your Parents’ DivorceShownotes

If you’re from a broken family, you’ve likely dealt with a lot of fear. For so many of us, that holds us back in life and relationships. At the core of that fear is usually the fact that we don’t feel safe. In this episode, a psychologist joins us to discuss why so many people struggle to feel safe and how that affects their life and relationships. We also touch on:What exactly is healing? Dr. Showalter explains 3 aspects of healing.Is healing actually possible, or are we doomed to merely manage symptoms? What to do if you feel afraid or embarrassed about seeing a therapistA healing tool called the Safe and Sound ProtocolSign up for Therapy or the Safe and Sound Protocol with Dr. ShowalterShare How Restored Has Helped YouShownotes

For so many of us, our parents’ divorce causes us to question everything — especially if it came out of the blue. We ask ourselves: What won’t fall apart? We may even go through life feeling like there’s a disaster around every corner and as a result, so often we play it safe in life. We discuss that and more in this episode as my guest shares:How she blamed herself for the breakdown of her parents’ marriageHow nobody was there for herHow she struggled with low self-esteem, self-harm, and acting out sexuallyHow she never had children because she feared she couldn’t be a good momShare your storyShownotes

Art is healing. If you’re not an artistic person, that might seem odd. But it’s true. In this episode, we discuss why and how art can be healing and more:What type of art has been healing for our guestsHow art can help people from broken familiesA piece of religious art specifically for Catholic/Christian adult children of divorceDr. Daniel: Buy the artwork or sign up for the retreatMike: View his artworkShownotes

If you’re ashamed of your past because of mistakes or abuse, it’s natural to feel stuck. But you don’t have to stay stuck. Healing and freedom are possible for you.Author and speaker Crystalina Evert vulnerably shares how her broken family and sexual abuse caused her to cope with drugs, drinking, and sleeping around. We also discuss:Tactics that have helped her healA new book to help any woman, especially women who have suffered abuseAdvice and encouragement to women who’ve suffered abus e or feel brokenBuy Crystalina’s Book or Get First Chapter FreeGet a CoachShownotes