Divorced People

Lauren Stevens is a single mom, business owner, survivor, and badass. She took a huge leap of faith and quit her job, divorced her abuser, sold her home, and put everything she had into building Joy Worthy Co. Joy Worthy is an event rental space and creative workshop where she hosts paint pours, cooking classes, charcuterie making, holiday themed events, birthday parties, and more! She wanted a place where people can come together to feel JOY and express their artistic side. In a world filled with so much hate, she wanted people to know there is still joy to be found. Lauren’s story is one that many of you may relate to. She grew up in a small Southern town, deep in a rigid Christianity, moved away from home, fell in love looking for that romcom love story, only to find that the pink flags she thought she saw were red and she needed to get away. She got married fast to fill a court obligation to be able to take in two young girls who needed a home. She put aside her voice in her head telling her he may not be the one and leaped into what she hoped was her fairytale. The red flags appeared, the abuse started, until one day it went too far and her inner beast woke up and she took her child and left and never looked back. You’ll hear more about what happened, how religion played a role in her story and her abuse, and how she became the Boss Babe that she is now! We hope you enjoy this story as much as we did. It’s a unique experience to watch your friend’s story unfold and then get to hear her tell it years later. I had the unique experience of hearing her open up about what she wanted from her friends during her journey and realizing I spent my time as a cheerleader instead of a honest friend who sees the flags and doesn’t speak up. Just like in her romcoms, there’s always the friend that supports no matter what and doesn’t learn to speak up and share her thoughts until it’s too late! My bestie and I have a phrase we use whenever the other one is sharing, and we have an opinion to chime in or if we are the one sharing and want that opinion ourselves- BBH- Brutal Bestie Honesty. We ask each other, are you here for BBH or not? Are you ready to hear something you probably don’t want to hear, but NEED to hear? Not everyone is, so asking if they want BBH first, gives them the chance to say no and just vent without fear of reality being thrown in their face. Let us know what you think of Lauren’s story! Can you relate to the romcom love gone bad that so many Millennials and Gen X have been programmed to find?

Olivia Dreizen Howell is the joyful and dynamic CEO of Fresh Starts Registry and the host of the Divorce Happens Podcast. She is a powerful single mother and a survivor of emotional and psychological violence during her marriage. In this episode, Olivia shares what it was like growing up as a child of divorce and into her own divorce story. She has a beautiful village supporting her and her two small children every step of the way. Olivia has turned the struggle and learning of her own divorce into the Fresh Starts Registry as a way for divorcing people to create a registry for items they need and love to start their new life! We hope you enjoy this episode as much as we did. 

In my day job as a collaborative divorce lawyer, one of our most magical tools in our non-violent toolbox is a neutral, skillful, well-trained child psychologist. And Dr. Brian Mackey is the very best. Brian is a divorced dad, a new-ish step-dad, the owner of a booming child psych practice in NC (3-C Family Services), and an expert in representing children's interests in divorce. He meets with the children of our divorcing families, gathers their needs and interests, analyzes their coping skills and patterns, and then lovingly shares this insight with the parents and lawyers -- all at the same round table. The result is a deeper and clearer understanding for everyone about how the individual kids in any family are doing with the change, and how all the grown-ups can best support them. It's the fucking best. In this episode, Brian discusses the cultures that shaped his own marriage and divorce, how to love your kids through family change, what he learns from kiddos whose parents are in the process, and the not so secret perks of leaving an unhealthy marriage and co-parenting like a pro.

Jen Berlingo, a coach, writer, and former therapist, shares her beautiful journey of coming out as queer in midlife after a marriage that no longer felt right. She explores the challenges of navigating identity in a conservative world, revealing the intricacies of her self-discovery. Jen reflects on love's unexpected twists, the realities of parenting a non-binary child, and the emotional complexities of relationships during the pandemic. Her insights on grief, authenticity, and personal growth provide a powerful perspective on love and life transitions.

Sarah Armstrong has remained dedicated to having a "good divorce," for the sake of her daughter and her own peace. Her book, "The Mom's Guide to a Good Divorce" is a brilliantly organized and digestible handbook of the mantras, tips, and focus points that have helped her to co-parent her child to young adulthood with peace, stability, and care.   Please enjoy this final episode of the inaugural season of the Divorced People Podcast!! Look out for a bright new season starting soon.

Laura Phoenix is a treasured friend, practitioner, teacher, and role model for our host, NQ. This episode just begins to scratch the surface of the wisdom that Laura has gained through her abusive marriage, merciful divorce, healing journey, and through her current work as a somatic experiencing practitioner (and much more, of course).  Please enjoy the conversation, share widely, and reach out with questions, kvells, or the like!

Rebecca Feinglos is bringing grief guidance to the masses. After losing her father and her marriage in the early days of COVID, Rebecca boldly took a year off of her work in NC government and policy, declaring the time her much-needed and deserved "grieve leave." And she's been thinking, writing, and sharing about the topic of grief ever since. I have been hearing the word grief more and more each day, both in just mainstream conversation and in my divorce work. It's not a new experience, but it does seem to be having a new kind of attention and increased clarity. It feels so lucky and serendipitous that Rebecca is also here in Durham, NC and that we got to have this conversation. Listen in to hear about Rebecca's intense stories of loss and emotion, transformation, and a dogged pursuit of peace and meaning. 

Kamara Thomas is a wise wise woman. A true artist and mother, tarot reader and playright, Virgo queen and now, a divorced person. This episode is spiritual sustenance and food for your faith muscles. Faith in yourself, faith in a healing spirit, and faith in humanity. Kamara shares the story of knowing it was time to end her toxic marriage, working through a cancer diagnosis during her separation, and finding meaning in it all in very short order.  Please enjoy the generosity, love, tenderness, and wisdom of this episode.    Join our Patreon to support this art and support work! https://www.patreon.com/divorcedpeople

Samantha Falk is a divorced person, co-parent, and communications professional. Sam's divorce began about 7 years ago, with an acute incident you'll hear about in the episode. An instinct to protect her children from verbal violence led Sam to divorce, and it was not a short or easy process. These days Sam is still working to protect her teenage sons, enjoying a happy and new second marriage, and writing a book about divorce with her divorce lawyer, Rain Henderson. Rain Henderson is in the process of winding down her 30 year career as a divorce litigator in Vancouver, BC. She is not a divorced person herself, but she has seen thousands of divorces go through the Canadian court system. Rain describes her reputation as being the attorney folks seek when all other less aggressive avenues for divorce have failed. A "baracuda" she says. She guided Sam through her rough divorce, and is now working with Sam on a book that helps prepare folks for legal divorce both emotionally and logistically. Her take on the behind-the-scenes of litigation and her career is fascinating. Take in tips about self-care during divorce and beyond, peek behind the curtain of divorce litigation, and witness the renaissance of Sam as she claims her health and happiness and walks through "hellfires" to do it.   Join our Patreon to support this art and support work! https://www.patreon.com/divorcedpeople   You can find Sam here: https://www.samfalk.com/ You can find Rain here: https://www.hhlaw.ca/our-lawyers/rain-henderson/ You can find Nicole here: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicolequallen/ 

Heather Gray is about 6 years past her divorce. She has brilliant clarity on why it was the right call, how to do better in her second marriage, and the worst part of it all (not seeing her kids all the time). There was no wild infidelity, no dramatic addiction, none of the storylines we like to see as 'excuses' for divorce, but for Heather the math just didn't add up anymore for what the marriage took versus what it gave.  Heather has long been a divorce role model of mine, and I'm so humbled by her act of story-sharing here. Please enjoy this window into the divorce, remarriage, and rebirth journey of Heather Gray.    Join our Patreon to support this art and support work! https://www.patreon.com/divorcedpeople