Make Some Noise with Andrea Owen

This week on the YKAL podcast, I am waaaay too excited to have my very dear friend, Lisa Daron Grossman join me. She is a phenomenal life coach (I know because she was my coach!), amazing human being, and creator of the Connection Cure Project. In this episode we discuss the Connection Cure, which is a cross country project that utilizes face to face connection as a catalyst for healing and wellness. Lisa shares how it was “born” out of chronic illness and isolation. Plus, we discuss why it is so important that we are connected to one another now more than ever, answer whether or not some people need more connection than others and we chat about how engaging with strangers can be a good thing.In this episode you’ll hear: A human engagement project born out of chronic illness and isolation (3:27) Healing the body through micro moments of connection (9:26) How people whom have friendships and partners can still feel massive sense of loneliness (12:15) Why more than ever does it matter how we are connected? (15:47) Do some of us need more connection than others? (25:38) How a no judgment speakeasy in the Everglades enabled human connection (37:00) http://yourkickasslife.com/224  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

My dear friend, Kate Anthony is back on the YKAL podcast this week to continue our conversation about body image. Just like in Part 1 of this episode, Part 2 follows the conversation between two women on their body image journeys, and the roads traveled so far. Full disclosure and for clarity: We are not body image experts and want to be very clear about that.Today, we further explore this topic and respond to some of the feedback we received from Part 1 of our conversation. We also discuss diet culture, in-depth. Join us as we awkwardly make our way through the second part of our conversation about body image.In this episode you’ll hear: Owning thin privilege and naming it (23 minutes and 10 seconds) What is diet culture, exactly? (27:33) “The lie about diet culture is that it’s healthy.” (35:28) Exercise is NOT bad. Rejecting diet culture was an act of revolution and act of self-love (40:50) Reflecting on our earliest memories of dieting, our mothers’ way of handling body image and how those experiences scoped our own views about our bodies and diet culture (47:23) If not dieting, then what? Kate’s choice to reject dieting and how she is learning to walk through this new part of her journey (59:19) Kate Anthony is a certified life coach who helps women decide if they should stay in or leave their marriages and then guides them through the divorce process should they choose to leave.Kate empowers women to find their strength, passion, and confidence even in the most disempowering of circumstances and helps them move forward with concrete plans, putting their children at the center (not in the middle) of all decisions.In addition to her certification, Kate has also trained as a relationship coach and is an expert in communication, co-parenting, and emotional intelligence.http://yourkickasslife.com/223 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hey there ass-kickers! This week on the podcast, Kathleen Shannon, co-host of Being Boss Podcast and founder of Braid Creative and Consulting, joins me to discuss her new book, Being Boss: Take Control of Your Work and Live Life on Your Own Terms.In this episode, we talk about what it means to be “boss” and how to cultivate a boss mindset. Plus, we discuss defining values and setting boundaries that align with those values (as you know, this is one of my favorite topics!). We also touch on several topics that will put you on the path to being boss and living life on your own terms.In this episode you’ll hear: Core values and how the value of decisiveness can help you move forward (6:25) Self trust, how is this cultivated? (10:38) Defining your values, what resonates with you and your story (12:27) How do we reevaluate our relationship with money? (13:24) Inner critic, internal freak-outs and surrounding yourself with your post-it note people (21:42) Thinking from your heart and how is this different than thinking from your brain (25:36) Kathleen Shannon is the founder of Braid Creative and Consulting, a boutique branding agency and consultancy she co-owns with her sister. She also does creative coaching and is regularly invited to speak on personal branding at design conferences and retreats. She lives in Oklahoma City with her husband and son.http://yourkickasslife.com/222  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

My dear friend Kate Anthony joins me on the podcast this week. Kate is a certified life coach who helps women decide if they should stay in or leave their marriages and then guides them through the divorce process should they choose to leave. She is amazing at what she does!Prior to our podcast recording, we had planned on talking about a very specific topic. And then what unfolded was more akin to an open and honest conversation between two women, two friends, in their 40s talking about body image (trigger warning - we touch on eating disorders). We also discuss how our body image has changed and evolved over the years, the pitfalls we’ve experienced and more. This is not your typical episode which gets wrapped up with a pretty bow at the end. But neither does life, the journey is always evolving and changing.In this episode you’ll hear: Two friends plan to dance like nobody's watching, while in workout clothes (11 minutes and 23 seconds) Body comparison, cellulite, and managing your inner-critic (21:06) Views on exercising, including some reasons why we push it away, plus body shaming in the self-help industry (27:33) Being deliberate with rejecting diet culture (30:01) Hitting rock bottom, Kate’s experience with an eating disorder and working through it (39:21) Being intentional with body image beliefs and behaviors in order to be a better role model for our children, body shaming and cultural taboos (46:07) http://yourkickasslife.com/221  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hi ass-kickers! Following February’s month-long daily diary episodes, we are back with guest interviews and our regularly scheduled programming. Today, I have an amazing guest with me, Bari Tessler. Bari is a financial therapist and mentor coach. She is also the founder of The Art of Money: a global, year-long money school, which integrates Money Healing, Money Practices and Money Maps. No matter what economic class you were born into or what class you are in now, money-shaming exists. Bari talks about how money shaming affects our ability to reach our goals. Plus, we touch on money stories, your relationship with money and how money can affect your relationship with your partner or spouse (and what to do about it).In this episode you’ll hear: Bari’s relationship to money and her own money story (5 minutes and 20 seconds) The origins of our money stories and savers versus spenders (9:43) Bari’s body check-in tip to help you build a better relationship with money, she calls it the anecdote to money shame (22:08) How to connect with your partner on a deeper level, starting with “money dates” (29:35) When one partner makes more money, how that affects control, personal value and worth (42:03) Bari Tessler Linden, MA, is a Financial Therapist, Mentor Coach and Mama-preneur. Bari’s gentle, body-centered approach weaves together personal, couple, and creative entrepreneurial money teachings into one complete tapestry. She is the founder of The Art of Money: a global, year-long money school, which integrates Money Healing, Money Practices and Money Maps. Her work has been featured on Oprah.com, Inc.com, and the Huffington Post and in US News & World Report, Reuters Money, The Fiscal Times, REDBOOK Magazine, Experience Life Magazine, Yogi Times, Best Self Magazine and Emerging Women. Bari is also the author of The Art of Money: A Life-Changing Guide to Financial Happiness, published by Parallax Press.http://yourkickasslife.com/220 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Phew! We made it! Thank you so much for coming along with me for these daily dairies. It’s been so fun to put these together and thank you so much for your positive feedback (ask them for rating/review). I have a worksheet for you this week! As you know, personal development is about doing the work, not just consuming it.This week has been a mish-mosh of stories, all with their own lessons. Monday I told you the story of a dear friendship I had that had fallen apart and recently come back together.Tuesday was about my daughter and her baby bunny videos, and how they made her absolutely weep. And how amazing it was to watch her and how grateful I was that she allowed me to do it with her.Wednesday was about the ladybug infestation in my home office and how I’ve been watching what seems like their instincts to get outside, even though it’s not working for them. I have some questions for you if you might be doing this in your own life.Then on Thursday, I told you a story about ego, failing, and perspective. All in wrapped up in one short story.  So many lessons! When you download the worksheet, feel free to answer all the questions, or pick the ones that are feeling very present in your life. Don’t feel like you have to do them all just to check off the boxes ;) These worksheets are for gaining awareness so you can see what you might need to work on.Click here to download the worksheet***************************P.S. I have something exciting I’ve been cooking up. I know many of you are familiar with the work of Brené Brown and know I’m a certified Daring Way™ Facilitator since 2014. I’m thinking of doing a Daring Way weekend retreat in August. If you think it might be something you’d like to do, go to this link and sign up to be notified when I open applications. There is NO obligation to sign up by doing this, I just first want to get a feel for how much interest is out there! Thank you! 💜http://yourkickasslife.com/219  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This is a story about ego, feeling like a failure for 2 hot seconds, doing the work, and about perspective.Portland Oregon was the 4th of 5 cities on my book tour. My friend, Bari Tessler had recommended this book store, Annie Bloom’s, telling me how awesome it was and that when she had her book signing there, she had 50 people in attendance. Bari and I have about the same size audience so I thought this was completely feasible and we booked the event there.I was really excited about this one because one of my long-time clients was driving down from Seattle and a colleague I’ve known forever online was coming too. Plus, three additional colleagues had RSVP’ed and I was all around excited. The Facebook event told me 17 people had said YES and 74 were interested. I was expecting a great crowd!The bookstore had set up about 25 chairs and as the time got closer, there were 8 amazing people in attendance. Two of them were the lady I was renting an Airbnb from and her friend. Those 3 additional colleagues I mentioned weren’t there. Obviously it wasn’t a total failure. If I went down the rabbit-hole of compare and despair to Bari’s event, well, yes, but I did my best not to go there. The people in attendance were AMAZING and I know this is part of putting yourself out there. Sometimes it doesn’t go as we planned. Sometimes we jump and the net doesn’t appear and we have to deal with all the feelings around it.When the event was over, I was chatting with my friend Amy Pearson. I was telling her how awesome it was to get to meet people in person and also that I was a bit disappointed to see so many empty seats. And Amy said, “Really?! I thought this was a great turnout. I’m totally impressed.”Well, how do you like that for perspective?Sometimes we let our egos get in the way and that’s okay. Just notice.And sometimes we feel like a failure. That’s okay too, just don’t stay there. Realize it’s just a story your brain/inner-critic made up.Lastly, sometimes it’s all about perspective. What may not be great to you, may be great to someone else. It’s good sometimes to take that into consideration.**********************************I have something exciting I’ve been cooking up. I know many of you are familiar with the work of Brené Brown and know I’m a certified Daring Way Facilitator since 2014. I’m thinking of doing a Daring Way weekend retreat in August. Go to this link to sign up to be notified when I open applications soon. There’s no obligation, but I’d love to get a feel for how much interest is out there! Thank you!http://yourkickasslife.com/218  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Since we bought our house in North Carolina, every winter I have a minor ladybug infestation in my home office. They gather on the inside of my window and crawl around, trying to get out.Now, I don’t know hardly anything about ladybugs (except they are the only bug I feel comfortable holding, I know, so weird and judgy against other bugs), but I wonder if they instinctively know what to do as they try to get outside and free themselves. And they try and try, but are trapped.So, every year around this time I do my best to gather them up. Because if I don’t, they die trying to get outside, and then there are dead ladybug carcasses under my desk and that’s just not good for morale around here. (Even though my only co-worker is my dog).And mostly, I succeed in this. I get my empty coffee mug, or sometimes just my bare hands and gather up about a half-dozen at a time and take them outside. LADYBUGS, BE FREE! I shout. It’s kind of exciting.And the weird thing is some of them don’t want to be saved. Or rather, they aren’t convinced my way is the way out. If I don’t cover them up one or two will jump out of the cup and fly back on the window, even though they’ve been crawling around there for hours, sometimes more than a day and it’s NOT WORKING.So, do you do this?What is it that YOU instinctively know what to do? Is there something you know you need to do, maybe even someone is trying to help you, but you keep going back to trying the thing that isn’t working?If so, I invite you to get honest with yourself. Journal about it. Or, even just admit it out loud to yourself or to someone you trust. You, just like the ladybugs, deserve to be free from whatever is trapping you.************************If you’re someone who feels like she keeps crawling around the window and nothing is changing, just like the ladybugs in my office, you may want to check out the private work I do with women. I facilitate The Daring Way™, based on the work and research of Dr. Brené Brown and it is absolutely life changing. Click here to read about it and apply.http://yourkickasslife.com/217 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A couple months ago my daughter walked into my office holding the iPad and crying. My first thought was a bit of panic-- what had she stumbled upon that had so clearly upset her?I opened my arms and asked her what was wrong. She climbed into my lap and showed me the iPad. On it was a video of a baby bunny. “Oh noooo” I thought. “She watched an animal cruelty video” and I braced myself for it.But, that wasn't it. As I watched the video with her, it was a person holding a baby bunny in their hand. Then, they pet the tiny bunny. Then, another bunny. Then, a group a little bunnies. And all the while we watched this, my daughter didn’t just cry, she wept.“Honey, why are you crying?” I asked her.“They’re just so cute, mama. They’re so cute and I love them so much.” Weeping. Just weeping.And I let her weep. I held her and we watched more baby bunny videos, then some newborn puppy videos, where she wept some more.And it got me thinking, how often to we let it all in like that? How often to we let all the feelings in, let all the cute baby bunnies in and just feel it? And if we do, how often to we invite other people in to be with us in that? My hope is that my daughter, only eight years old, will continue to come to me in her joys, her sorrows, and everything in between to not only tell me about it, but to allow me to witness her feelings-- as uncomfortable as it may be for me sometimes. It’s an honor for me and for anyone who let’s me in on their experience.And my hope is that you do too. That you find the courage within you to let all those cute baby bunny feelings in, feel it, and that you can find the courage to let someone witness it.http://yourkickasslife.com/216  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In episode 203 I mentioned a friend of mine where she had broken up with me in 2007 when I had all that drama in my life. I’m circling back in this episode to tell you what happened. Here’s a quick timeline:2007: She told me she needed a break from me, as her mom was ill and I had too much drama. She was right, but it was still devastating.2008: My life was back on track, her mom was well again, and we were friends again. 2011: We moved and we lost touch somewhat. 2012: I wrote her a three-page letter making amends to her for what I had known and remembered I had done wrong in our friendship. I also told her how much I missed her and that I would love to have her friendship again. She emailed me, acknowledging my letter and accepting my apology. She asked if we could catch up via email first. She told me a bit about what was going on in her life, I replied and did the same. Then, nothing. I followed up with another email, and nothing.I was devastated. I wrote about this in my book, how I never knew what happened. I agonized over what I said in the email, thinking I had said something wrong. I did a lot of work on letting it all go.October 2017: I never, ever check my “other” messages on Facebook. It’s usually creepy marriage proposals, but for some reason, I felt compelled to check. Lo and behold, there’s a message from my friend. She said hello, said she’s been thinking of me, asked how I was, and said she hoped me, the kids and Jason are well.I felt like someone had punched me in the face.It felt like a long-lost boyfriend whom I was in love with that had dumped me and then was circling back with a casual, hi! How are you? I had done all this work to forgive myself, to forgive her, to let her go and here she was again. Like digging up a dead body.Read the rest HEREhttp://www.yourkickasslife.com/215  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices