Help Me Be Me

This is for the person who got ghosted, not the person who ghosts. Contrary to how it feels, a lot of thought can go into ghosting. It could be something that someone debates and replays in their mind for weeks on end. The decision to ghost comes from a very specific place. It’s not “I don’t care at all” it’s more, “I don’t know what to say…” As in all my episodes, there are three parts – the what, why and how – the tools. This one’s for Bryan! For more of my work including the blog versions of my podcasts, head to YayWithMe.com To make a donation you can visit YayWithMe.com/donate or find me on Patreon.com/SarahMayB Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is for anyone who’s in the throws of getting over a really toxic and yet, addictive relationship. I would otherwise call it the rock bottom part of your relationship loop. Maybe you’ve known this was not a good relationship for you for a very long time but you were always too terrified to leave it. Yet now that you’re mid-escape, you feel crippled by the intense pain that’s been brought on by it. If that sounds like you – first of all I want to say – get to a therapist’s office, stat. This can be a really scary thing to go through without support. Now of all times, it can be really helpful to even try meds to take the edge off. If you feel like you can’t handle your sich – dial 9-11. That’s the simplest tool. And second, know that this will not be forever – even though that’s what your feelings tell you, right now. It’s just gonna suck for a little while. You’re in the thick of it, right now. The only way to move is up. Here are some tools to help you start heading there. The book (The Five Second Rule) I mentioned in this episode can be found here: https://amzn.to/2x8pUZa For more of my writing and to make a donation, head to YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hi peeps! This is an oldy but a goody. I posted this on my blog like 6 years ago but since someone requested, I thought I would throw it out again and also do the challenge myself. This is appropriated from a TedTalk by Shawn Achor - if you want to hear more about it you can watch that here: https://www.ted.com/talks/shawn_achor_the_happy_secret_to_better_work?language=en For more of my writing and to make a donation, head to YayWithMe.com Join me - this is my Day 1! xoxoxo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hi friends, this is a special power-up episode – it’s basically a list of my favorite and most frequently used tools as of late. I’m just going go through them in list format. If you’re in need of some tools for happiness, compassion, self-awareness, confidence, and energy-tuning – this is an episode for you. For anyone interested, here are the books and authors I mentioned: A book where you can find more of John Gottman’s principles: https://amzn.to/2vM4fGb A book about Loving What Is: https://amzn.to/2vN7z3K A book for fun and joy-tuning by Pam Grout: https://amzn.to/2OBeFzj If you want to check out more of my work and to make a donation, head to YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode I talk about why people are afraid of intimacy and commitment – and I do it for both sides of the relationship: the fearers and the chasers. So this is for anyone who was in a happy in a relationship and then their partner started distancing as soon as things got close. It’s ALSO for anyone who can’t seem to stay in a committed relationship and you don’t know why you find yourself bailing as soon as someone starts to like you. This is something I see often in my One-on-One’s and I thought it warranted a podcast episode. And because I am directing this at two audiences, I jump back and forth between who I am identifying with. So sorry in advance if that gets annoying. I don’t want one side to feel left out. As per usual there are three parts: the what, why and how the tools. To make a donation and see more of my writing head to YayWithMe.com My references and your recommended reading: For Huskies: Mindsight https://amzn.to/2AjEkKN The Self-Sabotage Cycle https://amzn.to/2LsQrds For Cubs: Attached https://amzn.to/2NQ8tTQ Men Who Can’t Love https://amzn.to/2K3MGpa Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hi friends, today I answer two questions – the first is about dealing with a partner who has boundary issues with a person who is infatuated with them. The second is about dealing with unrequited love – basically, how to confront saying goodbye to someone if you’re friends and in love with them. If you’d like to ask a question or to make a donation, head to YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is for anyone who feels not good enough, like a failure. Maybe you feel like you wasted your life, money, time, heart, career, 20’s, 30’s, fill in the blank. This feeling of not knowing who you are – not knowing why you’re behind everyone else, why you can’t seem to build a life that makes you happy – and it comes with an itchy state of discomfort with self. A constant narrative of self-judgment – the voice that isolates you and makes you feel worthless and like you need to escape social situations or at the very least have something expensive or exotic to talk about otherwise everyone will see what a loser you are. Maybe you’re one of those people who feels like their skin is crawling when they’re around happy and beautiful people: you look at other people and think – they’re so much skinnier, smarter, funnier, happier or ____than I am. Whatever the voice in your head says, this one's for you if you're hating on yourself and your life path. For more of my work and to make a donation head to YayWithMe.com ! xo References: https://www.goodtherapy.org/learn-about-therapy/types/voice-therapy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today I answer two audience questions: the first from a guy who caught his BF sexting on Grindr, and he doesn’t know how to move forward. The second, a girl who got ghosted by her love of her life right after semi-losing her job – now she’s overwhelmed and panicking about life and where to go from here. Hang in there guys - I hope this helps and the book I mention for Fred is linked below: https://amzn.to/2IEh5ib For more of my writing and to make a donation head to YayWithMe.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is all about how to deal with the loss of a person who has been very difficult in your life: the pros and cons of getting “closure” and if that’s right for you. Hi friends, today I am talking with one of my besties, Leila, about loss and impending loss – and basically, how to prepare yourself mentally for the loss of someone you have a lot of mixed feelings about. I am going to loosely structure this in 3 parts – since it’s more of a conversation. So in short, a relationship you have protected yourself from – because it’s toxic, and now you have to deal with the fact that you are losing this person – and that brings up all the unfinished shit from growing up. Hope it helps!! If you have any questions, or to make a donation, you can find me at YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hi peeps! This is a “Digital Diet Challenge” all about creating mental space for yourself and checking any harmful habits you might have around smartphones and social media. I challenge everyone to take a stab at this. I want to preface this by saying this isn’t about removing smartphones and social media – it’s just about becoming aware of how you are feeling in reaction to it. I hope this helps! For more of my writing and to make a donation, head to YayWithMe.com xo! The study I mentioned is here: http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/2167702617723376 A podcast about this topic is here: http://www.abc.net.au/radionational/programs/allinthemind/the-kids-of-today/9637570 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices