Embracing No Cherished Outcomes in Relationships

The concept of 'no cherished outcome' emphasizes approaching relationships with an open and undefended heart. It highlights the importance of honoring others and fully engaging with new individuals or communities without preconceptions or agendas. This perspective encourages genuine interactions by suggesting that one should not negotiate through withholding emotions or expectations, thereby reducing the risk of disappointment. Embracing this mindset fosters deeper connections and allows for more meaningful exchanges, focusing on the present interaction rather than fixed outcomes.

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Josh Boone

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Elizabeth Gilbert is the #1 New York Times bestselling author of Big Magic and Eat, Pray, Love. Her latest novel, City of Girls, was named an instant New York Times bestseller. Go to ElizabethGilbert.Substack.com to subscribe to “Letters From Love with Elizabeth Gilbert,” her newsletter, which has more than 120,000 subscribers.

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Timestamps:

[00:00] Start

[00:07:14] No cherished outcomes.

[00:12:27] Self-compassionate ownership of responsibility.

[00:17:24] The daily practice of writing letters from love.

[00:23:54] Two-way prayer vs. one-way prayer.

[00:32:29] The male approach to this practice.

[00:35:59] How do you feel toward yourself vs. about yourself?

[00:38:25] Understanding self-hatred to foster self-friendliness.

[00:44:52] Setting boundaries and dealing with those who refuse to honor them.

[00:51:47] Why (and how) Elizabeth avoids big family holiday gatherings.

[00:53:47] Comfort in solitude.