What happens when a world-class musician trades the pursuit of perfection for the practice of letting go? Valerie Frostman spent 20 years in classical music's pressure cooker before a personal shift sent her to a Zen center. What she discovered there—through experiences that defy ordinary description—transformed not just her relationship to performance, but to existence itself. From moments where the universe takes a step with her, to a shower revelation where all human suffering revealed itself at once, this conversation goes to the heart of a deep Zen practice.

For high performers worried that spiritual practice means losing their edge, Valerie offers surprising news: you don't become soft, you become free. And in one of the most touching moments, Kevin opens up about losing his father over a decade ago, leading to an unexpectedly exchange about how love persists beyond death—how those we've lost are "right here" in ways that transcend our ordinary understanding of presence and absence.

Links
Mountain Cloud - Valerie Forstman

Chapters

[00:00:00] - Introduction: From Classical Perfection to Zen
[00:04:00] - The Dallas Opera Crisis: Past and Future Splitting Apart
[00:07:00] - First Night at the Zen Center: Coming Home
[00:10:00] - From Student to Teacher: The Path Unfolds
[00:13:00] - The Wake-Up Stick: Old School Zen Practice
[00:21:00] - What Is Zen? Beyond Bumper Stickers
[00:26:00] - Why Stillness Beats Thinking: "Jumping From the Cliff"
[00:28:00] - Understanding Koans: Seeds of Awakening
[00:30:00] - The Famous "Mu" Koan: Does a Dog Have Buddha Nature?
[00:36:00] - First Glimpse: When the Universe Takes a Step
[00:41:30] - What Happens in Awakening: Body and Mind Drop Away
[00:47:30] - The Paradox of Pursuit: Why Trying Harder Fails
[00:54:00] - The Shower Experience: All Human Suffering at Once
[01:01:00] - Why This Was the Greatest Gift
[01:06:00] - Life After Awakening: Still a "Lump of Karma"
[01:11:30] - Will You Lose Your Edge? The Truth About Practice
[01:15:00] - Kevin's Realization: There Is Only Now
[01:17:30] - Practical Advice: Starting Your Own Practice
[01:24:30] - On Loss and Love: "The Ache of Missing Is Just Love"

Abstracts: Zero-shot models in single-cell biology with Alex Lu