Ninja Selling Podcast How Do You Know When Somebody's Uncoachable?
As a broker owner, manager, team leader, or even as an individual agent, sometimes you may find yourself dealing with someone who just doesn't seem coachable. But are they really uncoachable, or is there something else going on? As a coach, it's your job to ask the right questions, dig deeper, and find out the real reason why they may be pushing back on certain Ninja Systems. As Matt and Garrett point out, the number of people who are truly uncoachable is actually much smaller than you might think. Today's episode will help you unlock the real reason why someone may be putting up roadblocks in the coaching process, and determine how to get them back on the path to success.
Using the example of his own lukewarm feelings about handwritten notes, Garrett explains that oftentimes people resist certain systems because it brings up different fears or misunderstandings for them, rather than because they are uncoachable. He talks about finding other options that accomplish the same goal, and being careful not to write people off too quickly. Matt and Garrett share "uncoachable" red flags to watch out for, and remind listeners that sometimes it takes time for people to come around and feel ready for the process. Another possibility is that you're simply not the right fit for that person, and part of being a good coach is recognizing when the key to success might lie with a different mentor.
While coaching may not be for everyone, today's episode shows us that with a little bit of patience, persistence, and a lot of questions, you can help almost anyone overcome their struggles to achieve success worth celebrating.
Join the Ninja Selling Podcast group on Facebook at www.facebook.com/groups/theninjasellingpodcast where you can ask questions, give advice, and connect with other Ninjas. You can also leave a voicemail with your direct feedback at 208 MY-NINJA. And visit NinjaSelling.com/events for more information about upcoming open installations. Or if you're interested in taking your goals a step further, visit NinjaCoaching.com to check out all of our amazing coaches.
Episode Highlights:
- Today's episode is extremely useful for broker owners, managers, team leaders and individual agents
- How to determine whether you're working with a coachable person
- If someone refuses to do one of the Ninja Systems, they're very likely scared or unsure how to deal with it
- There could be something else going on, or maybe Ninja just isn't the right system for them
- Most people are coachable
- There are four types of agents in an office: productive/coachable agents; productive/non-coachable agents; non-productive/coachable; non-productive/non-coachable
- You have to be careful not to misidentify non-productive/coachable people with non-productive/non-coachable people
- You need to dig deeper and ask more questions to find out which category they fall into
- If you can find their "why," the reason they're an agent, you can find the path to bring them in and they become a lot more coachable
- Some people just get stuck on certain systems, as Garrett illustrates with his own example of resisting handwritten notes - it comes down to a fear of writing for him
- He has found his own creative workaround that still accomplishes the same goal of making personal connections - and this is okay, too
- Sometimes people push back because it's an excuse not to do a system, or they misunderstand it
- Questions that will help managers figure out whether someone is actually coachable
- Where is your strong reaction coming from? What memories come up around this activity?
- Let these questions sit, and when the person is ready to circle back and discuss their answers, that's when they're in a coachable moment
- You can't coach someone if they're not ready to learn
- You need to ask lots of questions, and if you're getting fewer and fewer answers, that's an indicator that the person may not be coachable or open to the process
- The number of people who are truly uncoachable is actually much smaller than you might think
- But if they really aren't receptive or willing to try different things with you, that's when you need to have the discussion of what path they want to take
- It's not an easy process to ask the right questions and dig deeper to find out whether they're coachable - it requires a lot of time and deep thought
- It could also be that you're simply not the right coach for that person, and maybe they would connect better with someone else
- Finding the right coach is crucial to success in the coaching process
- You also have to determine whether you are ready to be coached
- Being coachable means you have to set your ego aside and have some level of vulnerability so you can accept guidance
- A good coach will ask the right questions so that you can identify your own shortcomings - this is much more powerful than having someone list off your weaknesses
- As a manager, if you feel someone is not ready to be coached, see if they respond to other resources that might open them up to the process (success stories, inspiring athletes)
- You can't force people to feel ready for coaching
- It's the manager's role to help agents be the best they can possibly be, even if that means finding a different office or a different coach that works better for them
- As we gear up for the fourth quarter, if you're finding yourself putting up roadblocks around certain systems, or if you're a manager whose agents are pushing back, this is an opportunity to ask more questions and see if you can find a way to get past it or find other options that still bring the success you're looking for
Quotes:
"How do you know when somebody's uncoachable?"
"Anybody who responds that fast and that hard, typically is scared. There's something there that's freaking them out that they don't know how to deal with."
"From a manager's standpoint, they introduce Ninja to people, and they all of a sudden have some people in their office that are like, Yeah, no, that's not my system. I don't like it."
"I find most people are coachable. Most people - you can give them direction and get them to a place that they want to go to. But if you're running into somebody that's giving you that much pushback, there's usually something else going on."
"If they are coachable, which is the system that they would be coachable to? If it's not what we coach here, great, fine, we can figure something out or move them on. And if they're not coachable, then we have to figure out what to do."
"If we can connect the dots to what we're coaching, teaching, what the system is to their why, they become a lot more coachable."
"It's important in your life to have a good coach that can help you work through some of that stuff and understand it."
"If my coach came to me and said, You have to write handwritten notes, I'd blow out. I'd be like, If you're going to require that of me - this is so painful for me, I'm going to go find something else to do."
"That's my workaround. I will pick up the phone and have that conversation with somebody and tell them how incredibly important they are to me and what they mean to me in my life, which a lot of people would put into a handwritten note."
"I think there's some things you can help people figure out and there's some things you need to find workarounds for them. Because you don't know all the stuff going on behind the scenes that's shutting them down."
"I find most people it's a misunderstanding of the system. Like with the notes, they have a misunderstanding of what they're supposed to put in the notes."
"I think a lot of times we give up before we figure it out."
"I try to create coachable moments, and you can't just coach somebody on something that they don't want to learn anything about. It doesn't work that way."
"You need to ask more questions. And when you think you've asked all the questions, you need to ask more questions. Because that's the only way you can figure out what's going on internally with this person."
"I think for managers, being able to identify - the more questions you ask, the less answers you get - I think is going to be an indicator of whether an agent is coachable or non-coachable for you."
"When you are asking questions, and you're getting one-word answers, not a lot of information back, there's two things: One, maybe they're uncoachable. The second is maybe there is another big wall there that they're afraid to take down."
"How many more things do you want me to give you that you're not going to do? That's when you have somebody in front of you who potentially may not be coachable. And that's when you have to have a discussion with them and be like, Hey, what path do you want to go?"
"Sometimes you're not the right person who's going to ask the right questions that that person needs to answer. And all of a sudden, you find that person that for some reason is able to unlock those right questions. All of a sudden, you see this massive movement forward."
"For the individual - I had to go through this myself too - you have to determine whether you're ready for coaching… It's helpful if they're ready to be coached."
"To be coachable, you have to open up and have some level of vulnerability to understand that, I don't have all the answers. I have all the ability, but I need some guidance, and I need to be willing to hear things that I may not want to hear when I'm being coached."
"If you're a manager and you have someone who you think is not ready to be coached, see if there are resources that you can guide them to that might inspire them to open up to be coached. And that could be success stories from other people in the industry. It could be success stories shared from professional athletes."
"That's the role of the manager is to help the agents be the best they possibly can, even if that means they need to go to a different office, they need to go to a different company, they need an external coach or an internal mentor, but we need to figure that out for them so that we can help guide them in that coaching role."
"If you can help them get to where they want to go - you don't have to be the person that asked the right questions. But you do need to be the person that can put them in the place where they're going to have the right questions asked."
Links:
www.TheNinjaSellingPodcast.com
Email us at TSW@TheNinjaSellingPodcast.com
Leave a voicemail at (208) MY-NINJA
Ninja Selling
@ninjasellingofficial
Ninja Coaching:
@ninja.coaching
Ninja Events
Garrett
garrett@ninjacoaching.com
@ninjaredding
Matt
matt@ninjacoaching.com
@matthewjbonelli