In this episode of The Grounded Union Podcast, Brandon and Caitlyn dive into a conversation most couples never have—but desperately need to: how childhood patterns shape adult relationships—often in ways we don’t even realize. They explore how men unconsciously expect their wives to "mother" them, how women often feel emotionally exhausted in their relationships, and why unspoken family patterns continue to shape marriages years later. Brandon shares his own wake-up call, and Caitlyn explains the boundaries that helped break free from unhealthy cycles. They also provide deep conversation prompts to help couples unpack their past, understand each other on a new level, and start creating a marriage that’s free from old, inherited patterns. This episode is packed with insight, practical tools, and a whole lot of aha moments. If you want a healthier, more intentional marriage, this episode is a game-changer.

Our 2025 Grounded Union 2-Day Workshops:
📍 Mesa, Arizona – April 12th & 13th (a few weeks from now!)
📍 Portland, Oregon – June 7th & 8th
📍 San Diego, California – August 22nd & 23rd (In-Person & Virtual)
📍 Maui, Hawaii – October 10th-13th (3-Day Marriage Intensive—limited to 20 couples, lodging included!)
Workshops for Couples: Tap here to attend one of our 2025 in-person workshops

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Workshops for Couples: Tap here to attend one of our 2025 in-person workshops
Grounded Intimacy Program: Tap here for more info on our online couples program

Follow us on social at @brandontalksmarriage & @caitlyn_doerksen
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YouTube Show available here

Timestamps & Key Moments:

00:00:00 – Welcome & Event Announcements – In-person workshops are happening this year!
00:01:55 – You Didn’t Marry Your Mom – How childhood patterns unconsciously shape marriages.
00:05:25 – Brandon’s Wake-Up Call – The realization that changed how he saw himself as a husband.
00:09:50 – Why We Repeat Family Patterns in Marriage – And why most of us don’t even notice we’re doing it.
00:14:35 – Men Who Confide in Their Moms Instead of Their Wives – How this creates disconnection in marriage.
00:20:15 – How to Break the Cycle – The key steps to moving from parent-child dynamics to true partnership.
00:26:40 – What Real Ownership Looks Like – How men can step up without feeling like they’re “losing control.”
00:32:55 – Setting Boundaries Without Shame – Caitlyn shares how she set limits without resentment or guilt.
00:35:40 – Conversation Starters for Couples – Deep questions to ask each other tonight.
00:42:50 – Final Thoughts & Next Episode Preview – Why emotional ownership is the next big step.

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