Brendan O'Connor “We are not really individuals; we live within so many webs of connection” - Dr. Trudy Meehan on grieving suicide
Oct 18, 2025
Dr. Trudy Meehan, a positive psychology lecturer and author of The Way Home, shares her deeply personal journey of grieving the suicide of her ex-partner. She discusses how to navigate difficult conversations with young children, using metaphors to explain painful realities and create safe spaces for mourning. Trudy highlights the importance of rituals, parental honesty, and the unique bond formed through shared grief. She emphasizes that feelings of anger towards a loved one’s suicide are natural and urges those struggling to recognize their connections and seek help.
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First Responders Arrived Just In Time
- Dr. Trudy Meehan and her brothers were the first on the scene of her ex-partner's suicide and paramedics arrived just in time.
- The arrival of first responders prevented the family from having to manage the immediate horror alone and felt like a rescue.
Family Created Space To Breathe
- Two-year-old Meera spent the day at creche and with relatives so Trudy could have space to process and decide what to tell her.
- Relatives deliberately gave Trudy time alone to feel her emotions before facing the crowd, which she describes as lifesaving.
Tell Children Honestly And Concretely
- Tell children quickly, honestly and in concrete, age-appropriate language about a death.
- Use clear words (e.g., dead, heart stopped) and simple comparisons they understand, like a toy with a dead battery.
