53. Stephanie Thornton Plymale on Trauma, Mental Illness, and Healing

Stephanie Thornton Plymale is the CEO of Heritage School of Interior Design. Stephanie calls Portland, Oregon, home – a word with much meaning as she grew up without one. From living in a car on the beach with her five siblings, to isolation in the Dependent Unit of the State of California, to a horribly abusive foster home, Stephanie never experienced a feeling of family as a child. Married at 19 to her high school sweetheart, her desire for family roots helped her to build a stable marriage and loving home for her three children.

Stephanie continues to balance family life with promoting Heritage, the success of its students, staff, continually growing community and philanthropic efforts. Stephanie recently founded the Heritage Home Foundation, which serves our foster youth and homeless community, and is an advocate for non-profit organizations including Project Lemonade, William Temple House and Treehouse. She also currently serves on the board for Project Lemonade.

Stephanie’s traumatic childhood, family life and career is unique yet she takes heart in knowing that life’s lessons are universal and that everyone has a story. Her goal is to inspire others to share their stories, receive support and feel empowered by their ability to survive, forgive, heal, transcend and live the life of their dreams.

We chatted about....

• Why Stephanie decided to share her story after years of hiding it from the world
• The horrific trauma Stephanie's mother experienced as a child and how her unprocessed trauma presented itself later in life
• How Stephanie helped her mother release her trauma
• What it was like for Stephanie to grow up in a toxic home with a stepfather who struggled with substance use and how she later found forgiveness
• How as a child, Stephanie had to buy drugs and steal food for her mother and stepfather
• Why Stephanie believes her memoir, American Daughter, is about not living in a state of judging other people
• How eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) helped Stephanie process and heal her trauma and triggers
• What life was like living in isolation in the Dependent Unit of the State of California
• How the foster care system failed Stephanie by placing her in a home with a sexual predator where she was repeatedly sexually assaulted
• What it felt like for Stephanie to go from having no family history to discovering she descends from America's foremost founding families 
• The possibilities of what her mother's life might have looked like had she received the proper mental health treatment she needed to process through her trauma
• What Stephanie's relationship looked like with her mother towards the end of her mother's life
• How her childhood shaped how she showed up as a mother to her own children

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