There’s a tension we’ve all felt at some point between the benefits of conformity and the desire to be true to ourselves and stand up for what we think is right. On today’s episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson are joined by Dr. Todd Kashdan to explore how we can combine prosocial values with principled insubordination, so we can speak up for others (and ourselves) and maximize our chances of creating meaningful change even in the face of social pressure.

About Our Guest: Dr. Todd Kashdan is Professor of Psychology at George Mason University. He is a leading authority on well-being, curiosity, psychological flexibility, and resilience. He has published over 210 peer-reviewed articles, and is the author of several books including Curious? , The Upside of Your Dark Side, and most recently The Art of Insubordination: How to Dissent and Defy Effectively.

Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube.

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction

1:45: Combining skillful positivity and dissent

7:55: Distinguishing principled insubordination and generic misanthropy

10:05: Four elements of principled insubordination

19:05: Yin and Yang applied to insubordination

21:35: Safe havens and a secure base

26:20: How capable are we of cultivating self-awareness?

32:05: Positive intent, courage, and sitting with discomfort

38:45: Strategies for being a moral and effective dissident

46:40: Navigating societal hierarchies

51:50: Process comments as insubordination

53:00: What Todd does when his kids are insubordinate

58:05: Recap

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The False Self