

Identifying Harmful Patterns to Heal Your Marriage (Part 2 of 2)
13 snips Aug 27, 2025
Tricia and Justin Davis, co-founders of Refine Us Ministries, share their transformative journey through marital struggles, including infidelity and generational sins. They delve into harmful patterns like shame and unforgiveness, emphasizing the need to confront these issues for true healing. The couple highlights the complexities of forgiveness and the impact of family dynamics on adult relationships. They also advocate for the healing power of laughter and grace in overcoming challenges together, offering tools for couples to navigate reconciliation and embrace joy.
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Shame vs. Guilt Distinction
- Shame tells you that you are wrong and unchangeable, while guilt/conviction points to a wrong action you can confess.
- Justin frames shame as a trap that keeps you in sin, whereas guilt is a Holy Spirit gift that leads to repentance.
Forgive Yourself To Break Cycles
- Accept forgiveness from God and your spouse and then choose to forgive yourself to avoid repeating cycles.
- Trish urged Justin to forgive himself or the restoration work will become a repeated cycle.
Separate Forgiveness From Trust
- Offer forgiveness even if the other person doesn't immediately rebuild trust; treat forgiveness as the starting line.
- Tricia clarifies that forgiveness is free while trust must be earned through truth and time.