Date Your Wife Date Night |Date Your Wife | EP 055
Garrett and Danielle are proponents of dating your spouse at least once a week. They understand that adding young children to the mix can sometimes present a challenge but know that your relationship MUST come first if you want it to last. In this week’s episode, the White’s share tips for what has worked for them (as well as what hasn’t worked for them) in their quest to find babysitters and nannies. Where they ultimately hit the jackpot might actually surprise you.
Every week married couple Danielle and Garrett J White share insights and perspectives from within their own lives regarding the following topics discussed each month: Week 1: Sex Week 2: Money Week 3: Parenting Week 4: Communication In This Week’s Podcast….PARENTING Point #1: Routines & Consistency- Both Garrett and Danielle feel like this podcast has been so good for their marriage. It’s as if the listening audience has become their sounding board and allows them to be better communicators with each other without completely flipping their lids and going off on each other.
- Danielle: In life, once you get out of your routine it’s so easy to lose your momentum. It’s in doing the small things consistently that keep us on track to build the large things; it’s the small and consistent things in marriage that keep a relationship stable and progressing.
What are you doing consistently inside of your relationship that is noticeably making a difference in the way you feel about and communciate with each other?
Point #2: Baby Talk- In the land of pregnancy and babies, when a woman is overdue it is a common understanding that having sex helps induce labor. Danielle’s experience with their two previous babies was that within an hour of having sex, the contractions began. Garrett attributes it to his “very aggressive sperm.”
- Danielle’s well thought out plans for the gender reveal went sideways as the waves washed out the pink and blue smoke bombs she had carefully buried in the sand. Garrett accidentally reveals the gender of the baby during the podcast.
Did your gender reveal turn out as planned?
Point #3: Family Affair?
- A lot of times, people think they can only trust their family to watch their kids. Danielle has discovered that having someone other than family might actually be better for you and your kids.
- From her personal experience, she would rather hire someone to follow her structure and routine instead of having free help from family who want to do their own thing.
What has been your experience with family watching your children?
Point #4: On-Demand Babysitter Gone Awry
- Garrett wanted to have an on-demand babysitter who was always available. He paid her a salary and got her an apartment close by their home so they would have someone ready to care for the kids whenever he and Danielle wanted to go out. It evolved into a sense of entitlement and a situation where Danielle was having to dance around the babysitter’s schedule.
- Danielle: Finding a babysitter is like building a business. You assume that people you hire will know what to do, but you should never assume. Find someone that you like and then be clear about the outcome you expect while they’re there. Always keep them in check. People want to know how to win whether it’s a nanny or an employee and will start to retreat when they don’t know how to please you.
Have you set clear outcomes and expectations for your babysitters?
Point #5: Care.com: Your Shit is Legit
- By far the best decision Garrett & Danielle have made when it comes to finding a babysitter or nanny for their children is going through care.com. Garrett advises, “Request your babysitters driven by a dollar value, and when they turn in their application, make sure they send you a video.”
- “You’re investing in the guardianship of your children. If you’re paying a lot of money, set clear outcomes and expectations. If you look at the overall investment on a monthly basis, you’re investing in your marriage. 1-What’s your marriage worth? 2-How much are your children worth?”
Are you being a cheap bastard when it comes to hiring someone to watch your children?
Communication Challenge:Have a conversation about Date Night, and the challenges you are currently facing that are stopping you from going out consistently with your spouse. Get clear about what you want from your marriage, and what you can do to begin making Date Night a top priority in your marriage.
Date Night Topic:Have a brainstorming session about the things you and your spouse want to do on your Date Nights for the next couple of months.
Quote of the Week:“If you care about your marriage and want things to work out, you go on Date Nights. If you care about your communication and sex life, go on Date Nights. To pull that off, you’re going to have to go through some trial and error before you find what works for you.”
—Garrett J White
“Whether it’s family or someone you pay, there are really no excuses when it comes to creating Date Night and space for yourselves as a couple. It becomes a matter of making it a priority.”
—Danielle White