It turns out that serial coalition breakers the FDP were planning to break up the German government weeks ago, much to the surprise of no one except party leader Christian Lindner, who definitely had no idea about the weirdly militaristic D-Day paper — even though his best mate wrote it. Meanwhile, forget about coming to Berlin to make art — the new government here has decided that austerity is a brilliant idea and always wins. Oh well, at least Megan and Konrad have some festive tips to ease you in. Jingle bells.

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