Naomi Aldort, author of "Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves," shares her transformative approach to parenting focused on unconditional love and self-discovery. She introduces the SALVE formula for empathic listening and emotional support. Naomi emphasizes the importance of allowing children to experience disappointment to foster resilience and emotional intelligence. She critiques traditional praise methods and highlights the necessity of parental self-reflection to better understand children's needs, advocating for authentic relationships that nurture independence.
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volunteer_activism ADVICE
Empathetic Listening
Empathically listen to children and validate their feelings.
Make them feel safe to express themselves authentically without fear of judgment.
volunteer_activism ADVICE
The SALVE Formula
Use the SALVE formula: Self-reflection, Attention on the child, Listen, Validate, and Empower.
Ask clarifying questions like "Tell me more about it" to understand the child's perspective.
insights INSIGHT
Validating Feelings
Crying is a healthy release of emotions, not a sign of weakness.
Validate feelings with facts, not excessive emotion, to avoid overwhelming the child.
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Naomi Aldort's "Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves" is a seminal work in the unschooling and natural learning movement. It challenges traditional schooling methods, advocating for a child-led approach that prioritizes intrinsic motivation and self-discovery. The book emphasizes the importance of trust and respect in the parent-child relationship, encouraging parents to create environments where children can learn at their own pace and in their own way. Aldort's insights offer a powerful alternative to conventional parenting and education, empowering parents to nurture their children's unique talents and passions. The book has been translated into numerous languages, reflecting its global impact on parenting philosophies.
In this episode of the podcast, I was so excited to interview Naomi Aldort. Naomi is the author of Raising our Children, Raising Ourselves, which has been translated into 20 languages. She provides support and education for parents from around the world in sessions, workshops, web classes, lectures and running private intensive retreats. Her guidance is not about gentle ways to control a child, but about how to have peace without having to control. It is about a way of being and of understanding children so they can do their best, not because they fear us or seek our approval, but because they want to, of their own free will. Her approach has been praised as providing the best of The Work of Byron Katie and Nonviolent Communication combined, and more. She works with parents of children of all ages to create powerful parent-child relationships. Please note that this episode is not about Aware Parenting but about Naomi’s approach to parenting.
In this episode Naomi describes her SALVE formula for supporting ourselves and our children when behaviour is challenging so that we can be unconditionally loving to our children. Naomi describes how to support our children to express their feelings using her “Magic Words” and how crying is a physical and chemical release of feelings. Naomi give many examples of how to support our children with disappointment and pain in a way that builds emotional intelligence, resilience, trust in themselves and empowerment. We discuss helpful ways to respond when we make mistakes so we know we don’t have to try to be perfect. And she offers some wonderful suggestions for how we can do our work to heal our pain so that we can be the parent that we want to be.
To find out more about Naomi Aldort, please visit www.naomialdort.com, www.authenticchild.com and www.authenticparent.com and follow her on Facebook at Naomi Aldort and Instagram at naomi_aldort_parenting. I highly recommend her book Raising Our Children Raising Ourselves.
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