Mastering Mental Performance with Kevin DeShazo

Unlock the keys to success with Kevin DeShazo in this empowering episode of the Circuit of Success podcast. Join host Brett Gilliland as they delve into mental performance mastery, exploring pivotal topics like student-athletes transferring schools, decision-making grounded in knowledge, and the art of disciplined commitment. Discover the transformative impact of self-talk and the strategy of stacking small successes as Kevin shares insights into personal growth and development. “The power of self-talk is so important,” Kevin asserts, emphasizing its role as the language shaping our success. Kevin advocates for pushing beyond comfort zones to foster growth in this conversation. Gain valuable tips on learning from past leaders, making decisions without emotion, and preparing for adversity. Kevin’s wisdom extends to the significance of reading diverse perspectives, following engaging figures on social media, and immersing oneself in insightful books. This episode serves as a compelling reminder to reflect on your goals and dreams, taking actionable steps towards realizing them. By integrating practices like self-talk, stacking small successes, and embracing continuous learning, listeners can enhance their confidence and resilience, making tomorrow better than today. Tune in to this Circuit of Success podcast episode and embark on a journey of self-discovery, empowerment, and tangible strategies for achieving lasting success.

Mastering Mental Performance

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Welcome to the Circuit of Success.

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I’m your host Brett Gilliland in today.

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I’ve got Kevin DeShazo with me, Kevin. How

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you doing?

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Fantastic. How are you? I am good. How’s,

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Oklahoma City treating you today?

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It’s great.

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Not too wintery of weather yet. It’s actually

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pretty nice. So it’s a it’s good Monday.

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Awesome. It’s a little chilly and rainy here,

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but it it could be a lot worse.

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So that’s our item. I’m just outside of

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Saint Louis.

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And, so you are in Oklahoma City.

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You are the father of three boys. We

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both have something in common. We both have

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an asher.

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And you are married and running some businesses.

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Certified mental performance,

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mastery coach and founded, field house, media.

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And, we’ll talk about some other stuff as

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well. So, before we get started though, Kevin,

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could you just give us a little lay

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of the land? What’s made you the man

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you are today and what’s some of the

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backstory for you?

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Oh, what is that’s a big question. What

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has made me the man I am seeing?

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Probably who has made me the man I

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am seeing?

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You know, I’ve I’ve been really fortunate to

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have great mentors, great people,

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in my life from a a young age.

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And I think the the two things I’ve

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learned probably the most from from all those

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mentors combined is one, the power of speaking

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belief in the people. These are always people

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who believed something in me. Saw something in

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me, called those things up in me,

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treated me as if I I’ve I’ve already

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was those things

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and two, just the, their, the way they

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modeled their life. Right? They were people who

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were accountable. They were disciplined. They were consistent.

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What’s it was important to me. They were

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they were all rooted in faith.

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So they were good husbands, good dads, good

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business people, whatever their job was.

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And so I’ve always had had good mentors.

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And then over the years, you know, I

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went into the corporate world right out of

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college. Well, that’s not true.

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Don’t have to go down this down down

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this revolt, but I was I was an

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embalmer’s assistant for six months immediately out of

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college. Wow.

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Then then went into the corporate world. Then

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started my own business,

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and businesses. And so lots of ups and

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downs of peaks and valleys and failures and

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successes,

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think all those things, all those experiences, the

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wins and losses, you know, they they each

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kinda mold you into. If you allow them

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to, if you use them the right way,

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they mold you into,

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who you’re supposed to be. Yeah. And you

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grew up in Oklahoma?

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Mostly, I was in Missouri, until sixth grade.

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And so I moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma,

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right after I finished sixth grade, and dinner,

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Oklahoma since then. Nice. And doing some work

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with Oklahoma, the university. Right? That’s right. Yeah.

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We we do a lot with their athletic

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department, both from their administration, you know, jokes

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to Leon, their athletic director, their leadership team,

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their department,

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but also work with a lot of their

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sports teams,

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worked deeply with football team, travel with the

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football team. So it’s a it’s it’s a

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fun a fun client to have. Yeah. So

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speaking of football, so how did,

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how did you think it went last night?

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They picked the top four teams.

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Well, Florida State’s also a client. Yeah. Oh.

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So so so didn’t didn’t love them being

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left out.

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You know, it’s it’s a there’s probably a

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bigger societal perspective to take on it, but

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it was

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you know, the committee went, in my opinion,

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they went on feelings based on that I

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rather rather than based on facts.

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I just think it’s tough to leave,

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a Power five undefeated team

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out, you know,

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in in place of teams who have who

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have lost skin. Now for that fourth spot,

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I think there could be a lot of

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argument. Whether it’s Bamba or Georgia or Texas

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or

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even Ohio State, you know, they’re only lost

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being to Michigan. There’s a lot of argument

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for that fourth spot, but my opinion, Florida

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State should have been should have been a

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guarantee. Yep. Yeah. It’s tough. And I guess

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next year going to what? Ten teams or

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twelve teams, whatever they’re doing next year. Yeah.

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Twelve will change from that. But then you’ll

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still have the thirteenth team. That’ll be mad.

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That’s right. And, That’s right. That’s where I

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go because you’re right. It’s like the twelve

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team solves

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this discussion in terms of, like, okay. They

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would have all had a chance.

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And and I’ve been, you know, hoping and

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waiting for this this twelve team for a

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while because I my general opinion is if

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you’re in the top 08:10, maybe twelve,

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you probably have a good chance, like, to

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win a national, like, a national title. You’ve

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got some talent. You’re you’re pretty elite.

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There’s not always. Some years, there’s a massive

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difference, but typically that that one to eight,

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one to ten gap is not very wide.

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Once you get thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, say, okay,

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you’ve probably lost two or three games. It’s

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like you’ve had enough of a chance

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But it’ll be but there’s always gonna be

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someone who feels left out. Right? And whether

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there were thirty teams, right, someone’s gonna feel

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left out. Yep. Yeah. Well, you look at,

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like, Liberty, I saw the twelfth team, I

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think, liberty.

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And then you got, like, LSU on the

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thirteenth.

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Oh, wow.

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So the thirteenth team was LSUU. You look

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at the difference of who they’re all playing,

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you know, a little bit different deal there.

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So so, And and Liberty Liberty go to

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play Oregon. So that’ll be interesting. Yeah.

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Yeah. Who who are you guys playing?

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We’ve got Arizona. Will be a great I

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mean, Arizona, they’ve won, like, five straight, I

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believe.

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Mhmm. And then when you add all the

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transfer portal, so our quarterback just announced today,

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he’s leaving

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as a grad transfer, we’ve got a we’ve

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got a guy who’s who’s playing behind him,

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who was ready. And he this year was

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kind of a mentoring year for him. Talked

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about great leadership.

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But portal season,

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people transferring, coaches, moving around. So it’ll be

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interesting.

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Yeah. It’s crazy. I saw today the, so

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Ohio States play in Missouri,

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and they’ve already announced, like, their quarterbacks leaving

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Ohio State’s quarterback leaving. They had, like, I

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don’t know. Five or six guys already say

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they’re not playing in the game. It’s, like,

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it’s wild. It’s wild.

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Yeah. Yeah. So so how do we fix

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that? The societal problem of of this. Right?

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What I worry about with the, the transfer

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portal and all that stuff as accountability

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is kids these days can run from Right?

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Because if I hold you accountable Gilliland

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you don’t like that, well, then what are

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you gonna do? You’re just gonna take your

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bag and you’re gonna take the ball and

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go home. Right? So so what are your

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thoughts on and then how do we fix

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that issue?

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Yeah. It’s really interesting.

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I think transferring is fine.

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I liked the old way where you had

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to sit out for a season because that

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made you have to really think, like, okay.

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Am I do I really wanna go somewhere?

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Am I really that unhappy?

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That I’m willing to go sit for a

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year and lose development, lose playing time, lose

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putting myself on tape. If I think I’m

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good enough to go to the NFL, or

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MBA, whatever it may be.

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And so I I think there has to

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be some form of consequence,

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so to speak, transferring to cause them to

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to pause a little bit, which I think

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is is now come back. Now you can

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transfer

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once freely, but the second time I think

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now you have to sit out. Something along

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those lines. Okay.

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Or or some situation where you have to

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get a waiver. I mean, I think just

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allowing kids to transfer

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You know, when I was eighteen, I knew

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nothing. I should not have been making decisions

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for my life or my career at at

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eighteen because it would have all been based

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on how I the moment. And if someone

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does something I don’t like, well, this coach

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is against me. They’re being a jerk. Like,

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no, this is called discipline and accountability. And

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this is what growth looks like.

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So I think we’ve we’ve got a what’s

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interesting is the person who gets hurt the

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most in this are the student athletes. They

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think it’s helping the student athletes. They’re the

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ones who get hurt the worst. Because they

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all go on the Gilliland then, you know,

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whatever the number is, forty five, fifty percent

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have nowhere to go.

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There there’s no spot. So they think they’re

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going to greener pastures, and there’s nothing. And

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they go from a, you know, it could

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be an Oklahoma State to a division two

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or division three school or a low level,

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group of five, you know, division one school.

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It’s like, wait a minute. I was in

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the Big twelve. And now I’m

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at at, you know, the bottom of the

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pack in the sun belt or whatever it

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may be. Yeah.

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So I think that’s that’s part of it.

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I think we need to change the timing

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they they had a few portal windows, but

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doing it right now,

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when one coaches football coaches from December first

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to December sixteenth is an is an open

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period for recruiting. So they’re visiting all these

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high school kids,

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for the next two weeks while trying to

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keep their current roster here

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while trying to prepare for a bowl game.

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And signing day

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is in the next two to three weeks,

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like, the the main signing day. So then

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all this is happening in a matter of

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three weeks. And it’s just utter chaos,

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for everyone. And so to say, wait a

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minute. Like, we’ve gotta calm down with the

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opt outs of bowl games with being able

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to transfer

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there’s gotta be value in finishing what you

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started.

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And and if you wanna transfer, that’s okay.

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It might you might be in the wrong

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situation. Right? They may have fired your coach.

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You’re like, man, I don’t buy into the

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new coach. Like, this is not what I

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was here for. There’s always situations,

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but I do think there has to be

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a better process where it benefits everyone.

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Yeah. I’ve talked to coaches, you know, it’s

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it’s tough because now they’re having to recruit

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the same kids. They’ve already recruited Right? And

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so if it doesn’t get me easier. And

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that that whole accountability thing, like I mentioned,

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is what what worries me. And

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I don’t know. You worry about I worry

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about this. I mean, I’m just getting to

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be the old dad. You worry about, like,

00:08:57.000 –> 00:08:59.000
chat, GPT. I worry about that stuff. Like,

00:08:59.000 –> 00:09:01.000
is that gonna take away critical thinking from

00:09:01.000 –> 00:09:02.000
our kids?

00:09:02.000 –> 00:09:05.000
Right. Right. All that Gilliland so that’s probably

00:09:05.000 –> 00:09:06.000
a whole another podcast. But,

00:09:07.000 –> 00:09:09.000
so you are a big reader, I see.

00:09:09.000 –> 00:09:11.000
And so talk to me about that. So,

00:09:11.000 –> 00:09:11.000
obviously,

00:09:11.000 –> 00:09:14.000
I think it’s a a big important thing

00:09:14.000 –> 00:09:15.000
that people obviously need to do, but talk

00:09:15.000 –> 00:09:16.000
to me about what you get from it,

00:09:16.000 –> 00:09:18.000
what’s your process like, kind of books you

00:09:18.000 –> 00:09:19.000
recommend.

00:09:20.000 –> 00:09:21.000
I just think, you know, I fell in

00:09:21.000 –> 00:09:23.000
love with reading at a young age. I

00:09:23.000 –> 00:09:25.000
mean, in kindergarten, I was reading six grade

00:09:25.000 –> 00:09:27.000
level books and couldn’t couldn’t get enough. I

00:09:27.000 –> 00:09:28.000
just loved reading.

00:09:29.000 –> 00:09:31.000
And then you know, kinda as as school

00:09:31.000 –> 00:09:32.000
tends to do, I was forced to read.

00:09:32.000 –> 00:09:34.000
And so I lost kind of the love

00:09:34.000 –> 00:09:35.000
and and passion for it when I didn’t

00:09:35.000 –> 00:09:37.000
have a have a choice in when I

00:09:37.000 –> 00:09:38.000
was getting to read and when I read

00:09:38.000 –> 00:09:38.000
it.

00:09:39.000 –> 00:09:40.000
But I’d say in the last 10:15 years,

00:09:40.000 –> 00:09:42.000
I’ve just kinda rediscovered that passion.

00:09:43.000 –> 00:09:45.000
It sparks ideas. It’s a good way for

00:09:45.000 –> 00:09:47.000
me to to it’s it’s a weird combination

00:09:47.000 –> 00:09:49.000
of shutting off my brain, but also turning

00:09:49.000 –> 00:09:50.000
on my brain. Right? I can shut it

00:09:50.000 –> 00:09:52.000
off from my day to day and things

00:09:52.000 –> 00:09:52.000
that,

00:09:53.000 –> 00:09:55.000
cause stress or I’m building or need to

00:09:55.000 –> 00:09:57.000
think about, but it allows me think about

00:09:57.000 –> 00:09:59.000
new things, and think about the things I’m

00:09:59.000 –> 00:10:01.000
doing maybe in a in a different way.

00:10:01.000 –> 00:10:03.000
And I just I don’t know who who

00:10:03.000 –> 00:10:05.000
the original quote, where it’s from, but, you

00:10:05.000 –> 00:10:07.000
know, leaders are readers. And I just think

00:10:07.000 –> 00:10:09.000
that’s we we have to be reading. We

00:10:09.000 –> 00:10:11.000
can’t be stagnant just because I know what

00:10:11.000 –> 00:10:12.000
I’m doing in this lane today,

00:10:13.000 –> 00:10:15.000
doesn’t mean I know much about tomorrow or

00:10:15.000 –> 00:10:17.000
these other areas. And so I think trying

00:10:17.000 –> 00:10:19.000
to be well read, and trying to model

00:10:19.000 –> 00:10:20.000
that for my kids. Like, it’s just a

00:10:20.000 –> 00:10:23.000
good way to to slow down. Fortunately so

00:10:23.000 –> 00:10:25.000
far, my kids love reading. My fourteen year

00:10:25.000 –> 00:10:27.000
old, you know, we’ll go to Florida in

00:10:27.000 –> 00:10:28.000
the summer, and it’s probably, I don’t know,

00:10:28.000 –> 00:10:31.000
ten hour drive, twelve hour drive, and he’ll

00:10:31.000 –> 00:10:32.000
he’ll read an entire book, you know, just

00:10:32.000 –> 00:10:33.000
sit in the back of the car. We

00:10:33.000 –> 00:10:35.000
won’t hear from him the whole trip. He’s

00:10:35.000 –> 00:10:36.000
just got his his his head in the

00:10:36.000 –> 00:10:37.000
book. And,

00:10:37.000 –> 00:10:38.000
and, and he loves it. I mean, he

00:10:38.000 –> 00:10:39.000
read one year

00:10:40.000 –> 00:10:43.000
all the Harry Potter books from Christmas to

00:10:43.000 –> 00:10:43.000
February.

00:10:44.000 –> 00:10:47.000
Wow. Just just sat down and and yeah.

00:10:48.000 –> 00:10:49.000
And so I, yeah, I just think it’s

00:10:49.000 –> 00:10:51.000
such a valuable thing and and part of

00:10:51.000 –> 00:10:51.000
it.

00:10:52.000 –> 00:10:53.000
You know, I don’t know if I just

00:10:53.000 –> 00:10:54.000
think this or if this is true, but

00:10:54.000 –> 00:10:56.000
I think as a society in general, we

00:10:56.000 –> 00:10:56.000
don’t read enough.

00:10:57.000 –> 00:10:59.000
Social media doesn’t count. Right? Like, Twitter is

00:10:59.000 –> 00:11:00.000
not reading.

00:11:00.000 –> 00:11:02.000
And and so I think we we just

00:11:02.000 –> 00:11:05.000
kinda lost the the value that the books

00:11:05.000 –> 00:11:07.000
bring historical books, new books, And so I

00:11:07.000 –> 00:11:09.000
I like all topics. That’s probably not fair.

00:11:10.000 –> 00:11:12.000
I love reading leadership books. I love reading

00:11:12.000 –> 00:11:14.000
business books. I love history of getting getting

00:11:14.000 –> 00:11:16.000
more and more into older history books and

00:11:16.000 –> 00:11:19.000
seeing what leaders of the past did. Right?

00:11:19.000 –> 00:11:20.000
There there’s nothing new under the sun. So

00:11:20.000 –> 00:11:22.000
we can come up with with all these

00:11:22.000 –> 00:11:23.000
new leadership books today, but

00:11:24.000 –> 00:11:26.000
what did people do in the early nineteen

00:11:26.000 –> 00:11:28.000
hundreds and the eighteen hundred. Like, what were

00:11:28.000 –> 00:11:30.000
they thinking? Those those principles still matter, you

00:11:30.000 –> 00:11:31.000
know, so so learning from leaders of the

00:11:31.000 –> 00:11:32.000
past.

00:11:32.000 –> 00:11:34.000
Love it. Love it. You got a book

00:11:34.000 –> 00:11:35.000
right there behind you. I can see that

00:11:35.000 –> 00:11:38.000
one right there. Keep keep chopping wood.

00:11:38.000 –> 00:11:40.000
Yep. Right? So tell me about that.

00:11:41.000 –> 00:11:42.000
It was really interesting.

00:11:43.000 –> 00:11:45.000
So kind of the backstory on it. It

00:11:45.000 –> 00:11:48.000
was a Saturday night in January, and and

00:11:48.000 –> 00:11:50.000
it was freezing outside, like snow on the

00:11:50.000 –> 00:11:51.000
ground type freezing.

00:11:52.000 –> 00:11:54.000
And at the time, we lived in about

00:11:54.000 –> 00:11:55.000
a hundred and five year old house in

00:11:55.000 –> 00:11:57.000
downtown Oklahoma City.

00:11:57.000 –> 00:11:59.000
We’ve recently moved,

00:11:59.000 –> 00:12:02.000
just general life advice for anyone listening. Don’t

00:12:02.000 –> 00:12:04.000
move between Christmas and New Year’s. Like, that’s

00:12:04.000 –> 00:12:06.000
a great test of your marriage.

00:12:06.000 –> 00:12:08.000
We passed, thankfully.

00:12:08.000 –> 00:12:10.000
But so at the time we lived in

00:12:10.000 –> 00:12:11.000
a hundred and five year old home, and,

00:12:11.000 –> 00:12:13.000
you know, the windows were

00:12:13.000 –> 00:12:15.000
were less than paper thin.

00:12:15.000 –> 00:12:17.000
And my neighbor had a wood burning fireplace.

00:12:18.000 –> 00:12:19.000
And so we’re sitting there watching TV one

00:12:19.000 –> 00:12:21.000
night, and I can smell his fireplace burning.

00:12:22.000 –> 00:12:24.000
You know, my brain goes weird places, and

00:12:24.000 –> 00:12:27.000
I’m like, wonder? Like, wonder where firewood comes

00:12:27.000 –> 00:12:29.000
from? Like, what’s the process? Like, what how

00:12:29.000 –> 00:12:30.000
does that how does it get from tree

00:12:30.000 –> 00:12:32.000
to fireplace? Like, what does that look like?

00:12:32.000 –> 00:12:34.000
And and so I’ve googled it. Obviously, it’s

00:12:34.000 –> 00:12:37.000
not sound like secret process. I think government

00:12:37.000 –> 00:12:39.000
is not trying to prevent us from knowing

00:12:39.000 –> 00:12:41.000
what this looks like. And so I I

00:12:41.000 –> 00:12:43.000
what I found was

00:12:43.000 –> 00:12:43.000
that

00:12:44.000 –> 00:12:46.000
that the wood my neighbor was burning was

00:12:46.000 –> 00:12:48.000
not from that morning. It wasn’t from earlier

00:12:48.000 –> 00:12:50.000
in the week. That wood goes through this.

00:12:50.000 –> 00:12:52.000
It’s called seasoning, but it’s essentially just drying

00:12:52.000 –> 00:12:54.000
out. Wood has to dry out. It could

00:12:54.000 –> 00:12:56.000
be six, 09:12, fifteen months depending on the

00:12:56.000 –> 00:12:57.000
wood.

00:12:57.000 –> 00:12:59.000
In order for it to be ready for

00:12:59.000 –> 00:13:00.000
the fireplace in order for it to be

00:13:00.000 –> 00:13:03.000
be useful. Same thing if anyone listening, you

00:13:03.000 –> 00:13:04.000
know, you you go camping, well, if you

00:13:04.000 –> 00:13:05.000
try to light what

00:13:06.000 –> 00:13:08.000
firewood or your campsite, it’s not gonna work

00:13:08.000 –> 00:13:09.000
out. So same concept.

00:13:10.000 –> 00:13:11.000
And so I’m like, oh, interesting. Well, that

00:13:11.000 –> 00:13:13.000
means somebody had to be out in, like,

00:13:13.000 –> 00:13:16.000
March getting that firewood. You know, this wasn’t,

00:13:16.000 –> 00:13:17.000
like, earlier this week or earlier in the

00:13:17.000 –> 00:13:19.000
month, or this was months ago when they

00:13:19.000 –> 00:13:22.000
didn’t need it. That’s interesting. And so that

00:13:22.000 –> 00:13:24.000
made me think of culture and leadership and

00:13:24.000 –> 00:13:26.000
this process of of getting better.

00:13:26.000 –> 00:13:28.000
And so I just fired off a tweet

00:13:28.000 –> 00:13:29.000
as I typically do and,

00:13:30.000 –> 00:13:31.000
went to bed. Tell my wife’s, like, I

00:13:31.000 –> 00:13:33.000
think I found the idea of my next

00:13:33.000 –> 00:13:34.000
book. And she’s like, I’m sure you did

00:13:34.000 –> 00:13:36.000
because this is a seven times a week.

00:13:36.000 –> 00:13:38.000
I think I have an idea for a

00:13:38.000 –> 00:13:38.000
new book.

00:13:39.000 –> 00:13:40.000
And and so I woke up and it

00:13:40.000 –> 00:13:42.000
had kinda blown up a little bit. Like,

00:13:42.000 –> 00:13:44.000
okay. Interesting. That that resonated, which that’s a

00:13:44.000 –> 00:13:46.000
lot of what social media is for me

00:13:46.000 –> 00:13:48.000
is just putting out thoughts to see what

00:13:48.000 –> 00:13:49.000
resonates, what connects,

00:13:50.000 –> 00:13:52.000
and that one did. And so then I

00:13:52.000 –> 00:13:53.000
I have a a newsletter that I write

00:13:53.000 –> 00:13:55.000
for leaders every day.

00:13:55.000 –> 00:13:56.000
Used that story

00:13:56.000 –> 00:13:58.000
in my newsletter. So that was on a

00:13:58.000 –> 00:14:00.000
Saturday. Use this the story of my newsletter

00:14:00.000 –> 00:14:02.000
on a Monday. And I don’t usually get

00:14:02.000 –> 00:14:05.000
responses on the newsletter. It’s not designed to

00:14:05.000 –> 00:14:07.000
get responses. It’s just designed to serve people.

00:14:07.000 –> 00:14:09.000
Like, here’s a thought, here’s a thing. And

00:14:09.000 –> 00:14:12.000
I probably got fifty, sixty responses of, and

00:14:12.000 –> 00:14:13.000
I printed this off and gave it to

00:14:13.000 –> 00:14:14.000
my whole team. And I gave this to

00:14:14.000 –> 00:14:16.000
my son. I mean, like, okay. Two for

00:14:16.000 –> 00:14:17.000
two. There’s something there.

00:14:18.000 –> 00:14:20.000
And our office is above a coffee shop

00:14:20.000 –> 00:14:22.000
here in downtown Oklahoma City. And so that

00:14:22.000 –> 00:14:23.000
Tuesday morning came in,

00:14:24.000 –> 00:14:25.000
which the copy shop put some headphones in

00:14:25.000 –> 00:14:28.000
and four hours later, there it was. Wow.

00:14:28.000 –> 00:14:30.000
And that sounds impressive. It’s not it’s, like,

00:14:30.000 –> 00:14:32.000
nine thousand words. It’s not like I wrote

00:14:32.000 –> 00:14:34.000
a forty thousand word novel. It’s nine thousand

00:14:34.000 –> 00:14:36.000
words. You you can read it in about

00:14:36.000 –> 00:14:36.000
thirty minutes.

00:14:37.000 –> 00:14:39.000
But, yeah, still wrote it that that day

00:14:39.000 –> 00:14:41.000
and published it a few months later. That’s

00:14:41.000 –> 00:14:43.000
beautiful. So how many total books have you

00:14:43.000 –> 00:14:43.000
written?

00:14:45.000 –> 00:14:46.000
Three.

00:14:48.000 –> 00:14:50.000
I just finished the fourth. I’ve got a

00:14:50.000 –> 00:14:52.000
new one that I’m I’m working on. But

00:14:52.000 –> 00:14:53.000
I wrote one. So so one of my

00:14:53.000 –> 00:14:56.000
first businesses I started was called Fieldhouse Media,

00:14:56.000 –> 00:14:58.000
and it was doing social media training for

00:14:58.000 –> 00:14:59.000
college athletes and coaches

00:14:59.000 –> 00:15:01.000
And so I wrote a book called eye

00:15:01.000 –> 00:15:03.000
athlete, which is really about helping coaches understand

00:15:03.000 –> 00:15:05.000
this generation of of student athlete.

00:15:06.000 –> 00:15:08.000
Don’t recommend that one. It was more of

00:15:08.000 –> 00:15:10.000
one is terribly, rewritten. But it was more

00:15:10.000 –> 00:15:12.000
of, like, to establish myself as the thought

00:15:12.000 –> 00:15:14.000
leader kind of in that space.

00:15:14.000 –> 00:15:16.000
And then I wrote a book called Leadershipinterrupted,

00:15:17.000 –> 00:15:19.000
which took three hundred and sixty five of

00:15:19.000 –> 00:15:21.000
my daily emails and just kinda put them

00:15:21.000 –> 00:15:23.000
in. It’s almost like leadership devotional style. It’s

00:15:23.000 –> 00:15:24.000
like every day is a thought for for

00:15:24.000 –> 00:15:25.000
leaders.

00:15:25.000 –> 00:15:27.000
And then keep chopping wood. And then I’ve

00:15:27.000 –> 00:15:28.000
got a new one that I’m working on,

00:15:28.000 –> 00:15:30.000
called into the storm about how to deal

00:15:30.000 –> 00:15:31.000
with adversity.

00:15:32.000 –> 00:15:33.000
Love it. Love it. So let’s talk about

00:15:33.000 –> 00:15:35.000
that. How do we deal with adversity? What’s,

00:15:35.000 –> 00:15:37.000
what’s your game plan there? Cause there’s a

00:15:37.000 –> 00:15:38.000
lot of it right now.

00:15:39.000 –> 00:15:41.000
There is. And so I think

00:15:41.000 –> 00:15:44.000
so here, this story, it’s not original story,

00:15:44.000 –> 00:15:46.000
but how I’m how I’m framing is is

00:15:46.000 –> 00:15:48.000
in in an original way. But I was

00:15:48.000 –> 00:15:50.000
at Florida State, a year and a half

00:15:50.000 –> 00:15:50.000
ago,

00:15:51.000 –> 00:15:53.000
and they were introducing the new CEO

00:15:54.000 –> 00:15:56.000
of of seminal boosters. So it’s like their

00:15:56.000 –> 00:15:58.000
fundraising arm kind of for for athletics. It’s

00:15:58.000 –> 00:15:59.000
its own separate organization.

00:16:00.000 –> 00:16:00.000
And

00:16:01.000 –> 00:16:03.000
Steven Ponder, the CEO, he told the story

00:16:03.000 –> 00:16:04.000
of of,

00:16:05.000 –> 00:16:06.000
when storms come over the mountains, like in

00:16:06.000 –> 00:16:08.000
the rocky mountains, they come from the west

00:16:08.000 –> 00:16:10.000
to the east. And he said, what happens

00:16:10.000 –> 00:16:12.000
is cows, they sense storm. They know it’s

00:16:12.000 –> 00:16:14.000
coming and fear sets in. They say, we

00:16:14.000 –> 00:16:15.000
gotta get to safety. We gotta get out

00:16:15.000 –> 00:16:17.000
of here. And so cows turn and run

00:16:17.000 –> 00:16:19.000
east, away from the storm. They wanna get

00:16:19.000 –> 00:16:22.000
away from it. And cows are dumb and

00:16:22.000 –> 00:16:24.000
slow. And so what happens is they get

00:16:24.000 –> 00:16:26.000
stuck in the storm. The frustration,

00:16:27.000 –> 00:16:29.000
the obstacles, the anxiety, the

00:16:29.000 –> 00:16:31.000
fear, their frustration

00:16:31.000 –> 00:16:34.000
until eventually the storm runs out. Right? But

00:16:34.000 –> 00:16:36.000
they’re just going with the storm until eventually

00:16:36.000 –> 00:16:37.000
it passes them because every storm runs out

00:16:37.000 –> 00:16:38.000
of

00:16:38.000 –> 00:16:40.000
And so, but by the time they the

00:16:40.000 –> 00:16:43.000
storm passes, they’ve lost ground. It’s like, wait

00:16:43.000 –> 00:16:45.000
a minute. We were already over here. Now

00:16:45.000 –> 00:16:47.000
we’ve run away. We’ve gotta do all this

00:16:47.000 –> 00:16:49.000
work just to get back to where we

00:16:49.000 –> 00:16:50.000
were. We thought we were getting to safety.

00:16:50.000 –> 00:16:53.000
We actually made things worse, and we prolonged

00:16:53.000 –> 00:16:55.000
our suffering, prolong the frustration,

00:16:55.000 –> 00:16:57.000
prolong the adversity,

00:16:57.000 –> 00:16:59.000
Meanwhile, Bison,

00:16:59.000 –> 00:17:01.000
fun fact, there are no buffalo in North

00:17:01.000 –> 00:17:04.000
America. So Colorado needs a new mascot.

00:17:04.000 –> 00:17:07.000
But bison in in Colorado and in the

00:17:07.000 –> 00:17:09.000
mountains, when the storm comes over, they sense

00:17:09.000 –> 00:17:11.000
it as well. And they say, great. Let’s

00:17:11.000 –> 00:17:13.000
go through it. So instead of running away

00:17:13.000 –> 00:17:15.000
from it, Bison go into the storm. Head

00:17:15.000 –> 00:17:18.000
first, step after step, they make progress.

00:17:18.000 –> 00:17:21.000
They still experience it because you can’t avoid

00:17:21.000 –> 00:17:22.000
the storm. Right? I think most most of

00:17:22.000 –> 00:17:23.000
the issues in life is like we keep

00:17:23.000 –> 00:17:25.000
trying to avoid adversity, and you can’t. It’s

00:17:25.000 –> 00:17:26.000
guaranteed.

00:17:27.000 –> 00:17:29.000
And and when when we accept that, we

00:17:29.000 –> 00:17:31.000
say, okay. If adversity’s gonna hit, I can’t

00:17:31.000 –> 00:17:33.000
choose what it is. I can’t choose, like,

00:17:33.000 –> 00:17:35.000
I don’t know if I’m gonna get sick.

00:17:35.000 –> 00:17:36.000
I don’t know if I’m gonna lose a

00:17:36.000 –> 00:17:38.000
loved one, but I know that adversity is

00:17:38.000 –> 00:17:39.000
gonna come at some point. So if I

00:17:39.000 –> 00:17:42.000
if I expect it, I can mentally be

00:17:42.000 –> 00:17:43.000
prepared for. And I can choose to do

00:17:43.000 –> 00:17:45.000
some hard things along the way in life

00:17:45.000 –> 00:17:46.000
to actually prepare me for the the the

00:17:46.000 –> 00:17:49.000
adversity that shows up. And so they realize,

00:17:49.000 –> 00:17:50.000
like, one, we can’t avoid the adversity and

00:17:50.000 –> 00:17:53.000
two, only way through it is through it.

00:17:53.000 –> 00:17:54.000
And when you just go through it, you

00:17:54.000 –> 00:17:56.000
still experience it. Right? There’s still frustration and

00:17:56.000 –> 00:17:58.000
anxiety and fear and frustration,

00:17:58.000 –> 00:18:00.000
but there’s less of it. Right? The cows

00:18:00.000 –> 00:18:01.000
have this prolonged,

00:18:02.000 –> 00:18:03.000
frustrating experience in adversity.

00:18:04.000 –> 00:18:05.000
The bison just simply get through it because

00:18:05.000 –> 00:18:07.000
they go into it, they get through it.

00:18:07.000 –> 00:18:08.000
And then on the other side of it,

00:18:08.000 –> 00:18:11.000
they’ve made progress. Mhmm. There’d have to be

00:18:11.000 –> 00:18:12.000
a lot of progress.

00:18:12.000 –> 00:18:14.000
Like, baby steps are still progress, but they

00:18:14.000 –> 00:18:16.000
they went through it. And they got better

00:18:16.000 –> 00:18:17.000
in the midst of it. And so that’s

00:18:17.000 –> 00:18:19.000
the general idea. It’s like adversity is gonna

00:18:19.000 –> 00:18:20.000
land on your doorstep at some point, and

00:18:20.000 –> 00:18:23.000
at multiple points in your life. Right? And

00:18:23.000 –> 00:18:24.000
and there could be there’s levels to it.

00:18:24.000 –> 00:18:26.000
It could be very small adversity. It could

00:18:26.000 –> 00:18:27.000
be a major live thing.

00:18:28.000 –> 00:18:30.000
The we have the choice in that moment.

00:18:30.000 –> 00:18:31.000
What do we do with it? We gonna

00:18:31.000 –> 00:18:33.000
let fear take over, run away from it,

00:18:33.000 –> 00:18:35.000
or we say, no. No. The only way

00:18:35.000 –> 00:18:36.000
through this, it’s not gonna be fun. It

00:18:36.000 –> 00:18:38.000
could be messy. It’s gonna be difficult. Like,

00:18:38.000 –> 00:18:39.000
it’s not it’s not saying there’s an easy

00:18:39.000 –> 00:18:42.000
path. But it’s the best path. Yeah. Yeah.

00:18:42.000 –> 00:18:43.000
It’s it’s to your point, I was it

00:18:43.000 –> 00:18:45.000
is gonna show up. Right? And I think

00:18:45.000 –> 00:18:47.000
so many times as we’re growing as leaders.

00:18:47.000 –> 00:18:48.000
We we want it just to be the

00:18:48.000 –> 00:18:51.000
straight line, but, obviously, success doesn’t work that

00:18:51.000 –> 00:18:52.000
way. Right? It’s a really squiggly market, and

00:18:52.000 –> 00:18:54.000
hopefully it ends up higher than where we

00:18:54.000 –> 00:18:56.000
started. But talk about, I I I can

00:18:56.000 –> 00:18:57.000
for me when I was, you know, I

00:18:57.000 –> 00:18:59.000
have a defining moments in my life, you

00:18:59.000 –> 00:19:01.000
know, like my second year as a financial

00:19:01.000 –> 00:19:03.000
advisor, the, you know, these different things that

00:19:03.000 –> 00:19:04.000
happen.

00:19:04.000 –> 00:19:07.000
What what moment for you was this light

00:19:07.000 –> 00:19:09.000
bulb moment? Maybe, like, in tough times, something

00:19:09.000 –> 00:19:10.000
you learned

00:19:11.000 –> 00:19:12.000
that, man, you’re just like, how did I

00:19:12.000 –> 00:19:14.000
not know that before? Any moments like that

00:19:14.000 –> 00:19:16.000
for you to stick out?

00:19:16.000 –> 00:19:18.000
Yeah. There was so year

00:19:20.000 –> 00:19:21.000
probably one, maybe two.

00:19:22.000 –> 00:19:24.000
When I was first starting Fieldhouse Media. So

00:19:24.000 –> 00:19:26.000
I had started another company. It failed miserably.

00:19:26.000 –> 00:19:27.000
It was in the health care world, which

00:19:27.000 –> 00:19:29.000
was my previous background.

00:19:30.000 –> 00:19:32.000
Like, zero dollars in a year failed like,

00:19:32.000 –> 00:19:34.000
so if there’s any any students listening or

00:19:34.000 –> 00:19:36.000
people starting business, like, the goal is to

00:19:36.000 –> 00:19:38.000
make more than zero dollars. Yes. You’ve got

00:19:38.000 –> 00:19:40.000
you’ve got bills to pay. Right? And so

00:19:40.000 –> 00:19:41.000
I I was at zero.

00:19:41.000 –> 00:19:43.000
Like, it was bad enough. Like, I had

00:19:43.000 –> 00:19:45.000
to sell a bicycle to pay a mortgage.

00:19:45.000 –> 00:19:46.000
Like, it was it was not good.

00:19:47.000 –> 00:19:49.000
And then I had this idea for field

00:19:49.000 –> 00:19:50.000
house media. And

00:19:51.000 –> 00:19:52.000
and I went to my wife and, like,

00:19:52.000 –> 00:19:54.000
you know, clearly I’m great at business.

00:19:55.000 –> 00:19:56.000
I think I should start another one. And

00:19:56.000 –> 00:19:58.000
for some reason, she was like, let’s go

00:19:58.000 –> 00:19:59.000
for it. And and we both felt like

00:19:59.000 –> 00:20:01.000
it was the right move But it was

00:20:01.000 –> 00:20:03.000
another year of

00:20:03.000 –> 00:20:04.000
no’s.

00:20:04.000 –> 00:20:06.000
Right? Every day was a no. Every day

00:20:06.000 –> 00:20:08.000
was a failure if if that’s the the

00:20:08.000 –> 00:20:09.000
definition of success if I’m trying to if

00:20:09.000 –> 00:20:10.000
if I’m trying to get a yes, I

00:20:10.000 –> 00:20:11.000
just got no’s.

00:20:12.000 –> 00:20:14.000
And it was I mean, I was depressed.

00:20:14.000 –> 00:20:16.000
I was anxious. I was, like, I’m not

00:20:16.000 –> 00:20:18.000
a huge person. Like, I was losing a

00:20:18.000 –> 00:20:19.000
ton of weight. I wasn’t sleeping.

00:20:20.000 –> 00:20:21.000
It was, like, we found out we were

00:20:21.000 –> 00:20:24.000
pregnant with our second son in that season.

00:20:24.000 –> 00:20:26.000
And my wife cried when we found out

00:20:26.000 –> 00:20:27.000
and not tears of joy. It was like,

00:20:27.000 –> 00:20:29.000
how are we gonna do this? Like,

00:20:29.000 –> 00:20:31.000
and but there was this we we had

00:20:31.000 –> 00:20:34.000
thankfully, you know, some poor mentors around us,

00:20:34.000 –> 00:20:36.000
a community around us, people around us,

00:20:37.000 –> 00:20:39.000
who believed in us, but also believed in

00:20:39.000 –> 00:20:41.000
what we were doing. And so, like, we

00:20:41.000 –> 00:20:43.000
we were having a weekly conversation with my

00:20:43.000 –> 00:20:45.000
wife, and I was like, hey, is this

00:20:45.000 –> 00:20:46.000
still the right path? Do we actually believe

00:20:47.000 –> 00:20:49.000
that this is the right path? Is this

00:20:49.000 –> 00:20:50.000
suffering worth it?

00:20:51.000 –> 00:20:52.000
And so we had to make a choice

00:20:52.000 –> 00:20:54.000
pretty much every week. Is this suffering worth

00:20:54.000 –> 00:20:55.000
it? And,

00:20:56.000 –> 00:20:58.000
what I wish I had known back in,

00:20:58.000 –> 00:21:00.000
and it and it certainly it it worked

00:21:00.000 –> 00:21:01.000
out. What I wish I had known,

00:21:03.000 –> 00:21:04.000
is that even in the midst of choosing

00:21:04.000 –> 00:21:07.000
to continue to enter into it, I wish

00:21:07.000 –> 00:21:09.000
I would have had a better attitude

00:21:09.000 –> 00:21:11.000
when I was, like, when I was actually

00:21:11.000 –> 00:21:13.000
in it. Because there was a lot of,

00:21:13.000 –> 00:21:14.000
like, we’d have the conversation, like, yeah, I

00:21:14.000 –> 00:21:16.000
feel like this is the right thing. Great.

00:21:16.000 –> 00:21:17.000
So I’d go back to work the next

00:21:17.000 –> 00:21:19.000
day and try to keep building. But my

00:21:19.000 –> 00:21:20.000
attitude the whole time was, like, this isn’t

00:21:21.000 –> 00:21:22.000
I was I was actually thinking this isn’t

00:21:22.000 –> 00:21:23.000
worth it. It’s not gonna work. I just

00:21:24.000 –> 00:21:26.000
I’ve I’ve come so negative,

00:21:27.000 –> 00:21:29.000
and so beaten down, I just didn’t I

00:21:29.000 –> 00:21:30.000
didn’t think it was gonna work even though

00:21:30.000 –> 00:21:32.000
I’ve I was trying to convince myself

00:21:32.000 –> 00:21:35.000
I wish I would’ve, had a better attitude,

00:21:35.000 –> 00:21:36.000
and I wish I would’ve,

00:21:36.000 –> 00:21:38.000
we had good community around us, but I

00:21:38.000 –> 00:21:40.000
wish I would’ve leaned more into that community.

00:21:41.000 –> 00:21:43.000
That’s part of the the new books, like,

00:21:43.000 –> 00:21:45.000
the power of your herd. Like, the people

00:21:45.000 –> 00:21:46.000
around you dictate your future.

00:21:47.000 –> 00:21:49.000
And I had the people around me,

00:21:49.000 –> 00:21:52.000
in my future, worked out okay, probably accidentally,

00:21:52.000 –> 00:21:54.000
which is just not how you want it

00:21:54.000 –> 00:21:55.000
to work out.

00:21:55.000 –> 00:21:57.000
It could have been better faster if I

00:21:57.000 –> 00:21:58.000
had actually leaned into the power of the

00:21:58.000 –> 00:22:01.000
people around me, because they were they wanted

00:22:01.000 –> 00:22:03.000
to pour in. They wanted to do whatever.

00:22:03.000 –> 00:22:05.000
And I was prideful in the midst of

00:22:05.000 –> 00:22:07.000
it saying, you know, I can I can

00:22:07.000 –> 00:22:08.000
do this on my own? And I and

00:22:08.000 –> 00:22:10.000
I didn’t because you never do it alone,

00:22:10.000 –> 00:22:12.000
but I wish I’d I wish I understood

00:22:12.000 –> 00:22:14.000
the power of the herd earlier on. Yep.

00:22:14.000 –> 00:22:17.000
It is so powerful, so powerful. And so

00:22:17.000 –> 00:22:19.000
thinking about that, I

00:22:20.000 –> 00:22:22.000
I read this quote recently that really hit

00:22:22.000 –> 00:22:24.000
me, and it was it said, you know,

00:22:24.000 –> 00:22:26.000
make decisions based on your knowledge,

00:22:26.000 –> 00:22:28.000
not on your emotion.

00:22:28.000 –> 00:22:30.000
Right? Yep. So it’s easy to say I

00:22:30.000 –> 00:22:32.000
wanna go to the gym and base it

00:22:32.000 –> 00:22:33.000
on knowledge, but there’s days you don’t wanna

00:22:33.000 –> 00:22:35.000
do it. Right? So what have you found

00:22:35.000 –> 00:22:37.000
yourself Gilliland, you know, these other leaders and

00:22:37.000 –> 00:22:40.000
these coaches and athletic directors and all the

00:22:40.000 –> 00:22:41.000
people you’re around,

00:22:41.000 –> 00:22:42.000
what do you find

00:22:42.000 –> 00:22:45.000
is is that thing, right, that gets them

00:22:45.000 –> 00:22:47.000
going to the, quote, unquote, gym, what it

00:22:47.000 –> 00:22:49.000
may be. What is that thing that helps

00:22:49.000 –> 00:22:52.000
them base their decision on knowledge?

00:22:53.000 –> 00:22:54.000
Yeah. I think for me,

00:22:55.000 –> 00:22:56.000
it’s honoring your commitments.

00:22:57.000 –> 00:22:59.000
Meaning if I committed to doing it yesterday,

00:23:00.000 –> 00:23:01.000
it doesn’t matter how I feel today.

00:23:02.000 –> 00:23:04.000
So I I’ve lately, I’ve been phrasing it

00:23:04.000 –> 00:23:05.000
kind of that way. It’s like, I wanna

00:23:05.000 –> 00:23:07.000
honor yesterday’s commit not today’s feelings.

00:23:08.000 –> 00:23:10.000
Because I it’s your point. I’m not gonna

00:23:10.000 –> 00:23:11.000
feel like it all the time, and nobody

00:23:11.000 –> 00:23:13.000
does. And I and I think that’s the

00:23:13.000 –> 00:23:15.000
biggest thing is is when I when I

00:23:15.000 –> 00:23:17.000
talk to young people today, whether that’s college

00:23:17.000 –> 00:23:19.000
students or or young professionals,

00:23:20.000 –> 00:23:21.000
a lot of it is how they feel.

00:23:22.000 –> 00:23:24.000
I’m like Yep. I’m not trying to be

00:23:24.000 –> 00:23:26.000
dismissive, but I just don’t really care. How

00:23:26.000 –> 00:23:28.000
you feel like we all have days. We

00:23:28.000 –> 00:23:29.000
don’t feel like it. This is part of

00:23:29.000 –> 00:23:31.000
life doesn’t mean you have a bad boss,

00:23:31.000 –> 00:23:32.000
doesn’t mean you have a bad team, doesn’t

00:23:32.000 –> 00:23:34.000
mean you’re in the wrong job. It just

00:23:34.000 –> 00:23:36.000
means that life is hard some days, and

00:23:36.000 –> 00:23:38.000
we don’t always feel like it. And and

00:23:38.000 –> 00:23:40.000
who you actually are, is determined by how

00:23:40.000 –> 00:23:42.000
you show up when you don’t feel like

00:23:42.000 –> 00:23:43.000
it. Because if if we all just showed

00:23:43.000 –> 00:23:44.000
up when we when we felt like it,

00:23:44.000 –> 00:23:46.000
we would make zero progress.

00:23:46.000 –> 00:23:48.000
Right. And but if I can, you know,

00:23:48.000 –> 00:23:51.000
I’ve I’ve been really consistent, and I’m not

00:23:51.000 –> 00:23:52.000
a disciplined person,

00:23:52.000 –> 00:23:54.000
but I’ve trained myself to be disciplined. Right?

00:23:54.000 –> 00:23:56.000
It’s not a personality trait. It’s it’s a

00:23:56.000 –> 00:23:58.000
Gilliland

00:23:58.000 –> 00:24:00.000
so I’ve I found that when I when

00:24:00.000 –> 00:24:00.000
I

00:24:01.000 –> 00:24:02.000
live my live my commitments,

00:24:04.000 –> 00:24:05.000
the the more I choose it the easier

00:24:05.000 –> 00:24:06.000
it gets.

00:24:07.000 –> 00:24:07.000
Meaning,

00:24:08.000 –> 00:24:09.000
so I’ve I’ve worked out,

00:24:10.000 –> 00:24:12.000
every day now for over three hundred and

00:24:12.000 –> 00:24:13.000
sixty five days.

00:24:14.000 –> 00:24:15.000
And and I just do it at my

00:24:15.000 –> 00:24:18.000
house. Like Yep. I’m I’m big on eliminating

00:24:18.000 –> 00:24:20.000
as many barriers as possible. It’s like, man,

00:24:20.000 –> 00:24:21.000
I don’t wanna wake up and get on

00:24:21.000 –> 00:24:22.000
gym clothes and drive to the gym and

00:24:22.000 –> 00:24:24.000
deal that and drive home. Okay. Can you

00:24:24.000 –> 00:24:26.000
do something in your house?

00:24:26.000 –> 00:24:27.000
You know, what can you do it? Like,

00:24:27.000 –> 00:24:29.000
go start simple, then you can then you

00:24:29.000 –> 00:24:30.000
can add to it if you want to.

00:24:31.000 –> 00:24:34.000
Yeah. But early on, it was not fun

00:24:34.000 –> 00:24:36.000
always. I didn’t always look forward to it.

00:24:36.000 –> 00:24:37.000
Some days, I wake up, and I’m sore

00:24:37.000 –> 00:24:40.000
from the previous day. Or I’ve traveled or

00:24:40.000 –> 00:24:42.000
there’s all sorts of excuses I can make.

00:24:42.000 –> 00:24:43.000
Well, I’ll just take the day off. And

00:24:43.000 –> 00:24:45.000
rest is great. Like, it’s okay to take

00:24:45.000 –> 00:24:45.000
days off.

00:24:46.000 –> 00:24:47.000
But

00:24:47.000 –> 00:24:48.000
I just had to say no. No. I

00:24:48.000 –> 00:24:50.000
yesterday, I said I was gonna do it

00:24:50.000 –> 00:24:51.000
today. So I’m gonna I’m gonna honor that

00:24:51.000 –> 00:24:52.000
commitment. And the more I choose it, the

00:24:52.000 –> 00:24:54.000
less I have to choose it. Right? The

00:24:54.000 –> 00:24:56.000
more I choose it, the more it starts

00:24:56.000 –> 00:24:58.000
to become automatic. And so now I don’t

00:24:58.000 –> 00:25:00.000
wake up and negotiate with myself. It’s like,

00:25:00.000 –> 00:25:02.000
alright. And I walk walk to the room

00:25:02.000 –> 00:25:03.000
where I get my workin’ in. It’s like,

00:25:03.000 –> 00:25:05.000
it’s just just what I do. And so

00:25:05.000 –> 00:25:06.000
I think

00:25:06.000 –> 00:25:08.000
for leaders, it’s it’s one, it’s choosing to

00:25:08.000 –> 00:25:09.000
live your commitments.

00:25:10.000 –> 00:25:12.000
But two, also having a reason for why

00:25:12.000 –> 00:25:14.000
you’re doing it. Like, I’m not I’m not

00:25:14.000 –> 00:25:15.000
working out to be a body builder.

00:25:16.000 –> 00:25:17.000
To climb mount everest, to run a like,

00:25:17.000 –> 00:25:19.000
I’m working out to be healthy as a

00:25:19.000 –> 00:25:21.000
leader, as an entrepreneur,

00:25:21.000 –> 00:25:23.000
as a dad, as a husband, Like, there’s

00:25:23.000 –> 00:25:25.000
a there’s a why that makes me want

00:25:25.000 –> 00:25:26.000
to get up every morning and do those

00:25:26.000 –> 00:25:28.000
things. And I don’t always remember that why.

00:25:29.000 –> 00:25:30.000
And and somebody said, and I do the

00:25:30.000 –> 00:25:32.000
same thing. And faith is a big deal

00:25:32.000 –> 00:25:33.000
for me. Youversion is an app that I

00:25:33.000 –> 00:25:34.000
use.

00:25:35.000 –> 00:25:37.000
I’ve been in it every day

00:25:38.000 –> 00:25:40.000
for one thousand three hundred and seventy four

00:25:40.000 –> 00:25:42.000
straight days. And so we’d like to start

00:25:42.000 –> 00:25:44.000
just going through the motions some days. Yep.

00:25:44.000 –> 00:25:45.000
Just a Bible app.

00:25:46.000 –> 00:25:47.000
Oh, yeah. Yeah. And they’ve got these little,

00:25:47.000 –> 00:25:48.000
you know, short short devotionals.

00:25:49.000 –> 00:25:51.000
But people are like, why don’t you just

00:25:51.000 –> 00:25:53.000
go through the motions some days? Yep. But

00:25:53.000 –> 00:25:54.000
I’d rather go through the motions the on

00:25:54.000 –> 00:25:56.000
doing the right things than do nothing. You

00:25:56.000 –> 00:25:57.000
know? So I’m okay with just going through

00:25:57.000 –> 00:25:59.000
the motions someday. That that’s okay.

00:26:00.000 –> 00:26:01.000
But I’ve just found the more

00:26:02.000 –> 00:26:04.000
I think the two things I’ll I’ll try

00:26:04.000 –> 00:26:06.000
to create is confidence and momentum.

00:26:07.000 –> 00:26:09.000
Meaning, if I do it today,

00:26:09.000 –> 00:26:11.000
that fear is gonna kick in tomorrow. You

00:26:11.000 –> 00:26:12.000
can’t do this today. You can’t work out

00:26:12.000 –> 00:26:14.000
today. You’re tired. You travel me. No. No.

00:26:14.000 –> 00:26:16.000
I did it yesterday. I actually know that

00:26:16.000 –> 00:26:17.000
I can do it. I have proof that

00:26:17.000 –> 00:26:18.000
I can do it. I have confidence because

00:26:18.000 –> 00:26:20.000
I did it yesterday. Which allows me to

00:26:20.000 –> 00:26:22.000
do it today. Once you get to stack

00:26:22.000 –> 00:26:23.000
two or three, four, five days in a

00:26:23.000 –> 00:26:25.000
row, I know you have confidence. Now you

00:26:25.000 –> 00:26:27.000
also have momentum. And those things can carry

00:26:27.000 –> 00:26:29.000
you through to some powerful places. Yep. So

00:26:29.000 –> 00:26:31.000
what kind of exercises are you doing these

00:26:31.000 –> 00:26:32.000
days?

00:26:32.000 –> 00:26:33.000
So I’ve shifted.

00:26:34.000 –> 00:26:36.000
So for most of the last year, it

00:26:36.000 –> 00:26:38.000
was some variation. Like, I’d just get up

00:26:38.000 –> 00:26:39.000
and I would do, like,

00:26:40.000 –> 00:26:42.000
push ups. I’d do curls. I’d do some

00:26:42.000 –> 00:26:45.000
tricep stuff. I’d do some some, crunches, some

00:26:45.000 –> 00:26:47.000
ab work. Just very basic.

00:26:47.000 –> 00:26:50.000
The last fifty days I think I’m actually

00:26:50.000 –> 00:26:52.000
fifty days in. Let me check my phone

00:26:52.000 –> 00:26:53.000
to make sure this I’m not lying to

00:26:53.000 –> 00:26:55.000
you. But I I

00:26:55.000 –> 00:26:57.000
signed up for an app called,

00:26:58.000 –> 00:26:59.000
ladder.

00:27:00.000 –> 00:27:01.000
Fifty

00:27:01.000 –> 00:27:04.000
one days. Sorry. Fifty fifty one days.

00:27:05.000 –> 00:27:05.000
And

00:27:06.000 –> 00:27:08.000
so you go in, and I I wanna

00:27:08.000 –> 00:27:10.000
say it’s twenty, maybe thirty bucks a month.

00:27:10.000 –> 00:27:11.000
I hate going to the gym. Like, I

00:27:11.000 –> 00:27:13.000
love working out. I hate going to the

00:27:13.000 –> 00:27:16.000
gym. It’s just not alright. I hate the

00:27:16.000 –> 00:27:17.000
process. I actually like being at the gym,

00:27:17.000 –> 00:27:19.000
but the whole process of it is just

00:27:19.000 –> 00:27:19.000
not convenient.

00:27:20.000 –> 00:27:23.000
For for my life. And so ladder, you

00:27:23.000 –> 00:27:24.000
go in and you say, what kind of

00:27:24.000 –> 00:27:26.000
workouts do you like to do, or what

00:27:26.000 –> 00:27:27.000
type of equipment do you like to use

00:27:28.000 –> 00:27:29.000
Where do you like to work out? How

00:27:29.000 –> 00:27:31.000
long do you like to work out? What

00:27:31.000 –> 00:27:31.000
are your goals?

00:27:32.000 –> 00:27:34.000
And it assigns you a coach or it’s

00:27:34.000 –> 00:27:36.000
a here here’s two or three coaches who

00:27:36.000 –> 00:27:37.000
could who could work for you. And you

00:27:37.000 –> 00:27:39.000
look at their program and you sign up

00:27:39.000 –> 00:27:41.000
and they drop in every Sunday night, they

00:27:41.000 –> 00:27:43.000
drop in seven workouts. So a workout for

00:27:43.000 –> 00:27:45.000
every day of the week. So I am

00:27:45.000 –> 00:27:47.000
really big right now on kettlebells.

00:27:48.000 –> 00:27:50.000
And so forty five usually it’s about forty

00:27:50.000 –> 00:27:52.000
to forty five minutes, each morning.

00:27:52.000 –> 00:27:54.000
And I just go in and they’ve got

00:27:54.000 –> 00:27:55.000
the plan right there. Like, I don’t have

00:27:55.000 –> 00:27:57.000
to leave my house. I’ve I bought, you

00:27:57.000 –> 00:27:58.000
know, have her mini kettle bells.

00:27:59.000 –> 00:28:00.000
My wife’s, like, we we got more. I’m

00:28:00.000 –> 00:28:02.000
like, sorry. I got stronger. I have to

00:28:02.000 –> 00:28:03.000
I have to get some more. How can

00:28:03.000 –> 00:28:04.000
I keep upgrading?

00:28:05.000 –> 00:28:07.000
It’s like, I have, like, every few weeks,

00:28:07.000 –> 00:28:09.000
like, a that another cap? Yeah. It is.

00:28:09.000 –> 00:28:10.000
It is.

00:28:10.000 –> 00:28:12.000
But it’s but I love it. It’s, like,

00:28:12.000 –> 00:28:12.000
it’s really challenging.

00:28:13.000 –> 00:28:14.000
It’s

00:28:15.000 –> 00:28:18.000
notice a difference in my energy and confidence.

00:28:18.000 –> 00:28:20.000
So I I love it. It’s a it’s

00:28:20.000 –> 00:28:22.000
a essentially a coaching platform that keeps you

00:28:22.000 –> 00:28:24.000
again, and I love tracking things.

00:28:24.000 –> 00:28:26.000
I’ve learned that keeps me accountable. So there’s

00:28:26.000 –> 00:28:28.000
a tracker, like, your workouts and all this

00:28:28.000 –> 00:28:29.000
stuff.

00:28:29.000 –> 00:28:31.000
But it’s great. Just that and I can

00:28:31.000 –> 00:28:33.000
do I can add a speaking engagement in

00:28:33.000 –> 00:28:34.000
Dallas a few weeks I load it up,

00:28:34.000 –> 00:28:36.000
and it’s three hour drive. So I just

00:28:36.000 –> 00:28:38.000
drove, took a kettlebell with me in the

00:28:38.000 –> 00:28:39.000
hotel room. You know, I can I can

00:28:39.000 –> 00:28:41.000
do it? And so that’s why I like

00:28:41.000 –> 00:28:43.000
to create systems and things that I can

00:28:43.000 –> 00:28:45.000
do at home or on the road. Yep.

00:28:45.000 –> 00:28:47.000
Love it. Yeah. It’s it’s nice to have

00:28:47.000 –> 00:28:49.000
the apps, and it because for me, I

00:28:49.000 –> 00:28:50.000
don’t know what to do when I get

00:28:50.000 –> 00:28:51.000
into the gym. You know, it’s like, okay.

00:28:51.000 –> 00:28:53.000
Let’s work on this thing. I’m like, well,

00:28:53.000 –> 00:28:55.000
I don’t know what all that actually does.

00:28:55.000 –> 00:28:57.000
So firm myself than just not doing it.

00:28:57.000 –> 00:28:59.000
But so I used the Peloton app, and

00:28:59.000 –> 00:29:01.000
then they’re, you know, rower and tread and

00:29:01.000 –> 00:29:03.000
all that stuff, the bike. And then, and

00:29:03.000 –> 00:29:05.000
then an app called Better Me I just

00:29:05.000 –> 00:29:07.000
found. It’s, same kind of thing. They ask

00:29:07.000 –> 00:29:08.000
you a lot of goals. I’ve seen that.

00:29:08.000 –> 00:29:10.000
Yeah. Yeah. It was one of those that

00:29:10.000 –> 00:29:12.000
shows up on my Instagram feed nonstop, and

00:29:12.000 –> 00:29:14.000
they don’t finally, I’ll tap out and buy

00:29:14.000 –> 00:29:15.000
it for That’s right. That’s right. Yeah. It

00:29:15.000 –> 00:29:17.000
was a hundred dollars. That’s exactly a letter.

00:29:17.000 –> 00:29:19.000
I said no. And the next thing you

00:29:19.000 –> 00:29:20.000
know, then like fifty dollars. And then it

00:29:20.000 –> 00:29:23.000
was twelve dollars for, you know, twelve weeks

00:29:23.000 –> 00:29:25.000
or whatever. I’m like, alright, whatever. Just a

00:29:25.000 –> 00:29:26.000
buy for twelve bucks just to not see

00:29:26.000 –> 00:29:29.000
the damn feature. One. Yeah. That’s right. Exactly

00:29:29.000 –> 00:29:30.000
right. That was exactly the same thing with

00:29:30.000 –> 00:29:32.000
ladder. Like, fine. Yeah.

00:29:32.000 –> 00:29:34.000
I’ll I’ll give in. I did that with

00:29:34.000 –> 00:29:35.000
ladder. I did it with athletic greens. It’s

00:29:35.000 –> 00:29:38.000
like trying to be healthier wasting food stuff

00:29:38.000 –> 00:29:38.000
and,

00:29:39.000 –> 00:29:40.000
with the diet part as well. And it’s

00:29:40.000 –> 00:29:42.000
just, yeah, I’m social media man. Get this

00:29:42.000 –> 00:29:43.000
every time.

00:29:43.000 –> 00:29:45.000
Well, athletic greens is showing up all the

00:29:45.000 –> 00:29:46.000
time too. Do you like it?

00:29:47.000 –> 00:29:49.000
So here’s my take on athletic greens.

00:29:50.000 –> 00:29:51.000
One, it’s good.

00:29:52.000 –> 00:29:54.000
I will just say, for the sake of

00:29:54.000 –> 00:29:56.000
people listening, it just destroyed my stomach

00:29:56.000 –> 00:29:58.000
Okay. I mean, like, I felt like I

00:29:58.000 –> 00:30:00.000
was under threat all the all day every

00:30:00.000 –> 00:30:02.000
day that anything could go wrong at at

00:30:02.000 –> 00:30:03.000
any given point. Yeah.

00:30:04.000 –> 00:30:06.000
And which part that’s of it, like, it’s

00:30:06.000 –> 00:30:07.000
a part of it as a probiotic. And

00:30:07.000 –> 00:30:09.000
so it’s it’s messing with you a little

00:30:09.000 –> 00:30:09.000
bit.

00:30:10.000 –> 00:30:13.000
I went to the head nutritionist at o

00:30:13.000 –> 00:30:15.000
u. Said, hey, I’m taking this. Do you

00:30:15.000 –> 00:30:17.000
is is it good? Do you recommend anything

00:30:17.000 –> 00:30:17.000
else?

00:30:18.000 –> 00:30:20.000
She directed me to something called Heart Greens

00:30:20.000 –> 00:30:22.000
by a company called Human, h u m

00:30:22.000 –> 00:30:23.000
a n n.

00:30:24.000 –> 00:30:26.000
And it’s, like, a third of the price

00:30:26.000 –> 00:30:28.000
about that at greens. Yeah. And it’s great.

00:30:28.000 –> 00:30:29.000
And I’ve had had no issues.

00:30:30.000 –> 00:30:32.000
Yeah, heart greens by human.

00:30:32.000 –> 00:30:34.000
Okay. I’ll write that one down. I gotta

00:30:34.000 –> 00:30:36.000
punch that. Yeah. I do green juice from

00:30:36.000 –> 00:30:38.000
our local grocery store every day. So we’ll

00:30:38.000 –> 00:30:40.000
get the kale and parsley and all that

00:30:40.000 –> 00:30:41.000
stuff. So it’s good for you.

00:30:42.000 –> 00:30:43.000
Yeah. So how do you stay a student

00:30:43.000 –> 00:30:45.000
of the game? And, obviously, you know, people

00:30:45.000 –> 00:30:46.000
are coming to you for advice. So you

00:30:46.000 –> 00:30:48.000
gotta keep learning and keep training and keep

00:30:48.000 –> 00:30:50.000
your mind So how do you personally stay

00:30:50.000 –> 00:30:52.000
a student in the game?

00:30:53.000 –> 00:30:54.000
Try to read and observe as much as

00:30:54.000 –> 00:30:57.000
possible. Like, I’m I’ve had to train myself

00:30:57.000 –> 00:30:59.000
because I used to wonder probably 10:15 years

00:30:59.000 –> 00:31:01.000
ago, and I’d follow other speakers

00:31:01.000 –> 00:31:04.000
or experts or authorities on whatever topic. Like,

00:31:04.000 –> 00:31:05.000
where did they come up with these stories?

00:31:05.000 –> 00:31:07.000
Like, what in the and I just realized

00:31:07.000 –> 00:31:09.000
they’re just paying attention to life. They just

00:31:09.000 –> 00:31:11.000
choose to be observant about whether it’s their

00:31:11.000 –> 00:31:14.000
kid’s basketball game or a road trip,

00:31:14.000 –> 00:31:16.000
or something with their friends or at the

00:31:16.000 –> 00:31:19.000
grocery store. They’re observing human behavior.

00:31:20.000 –> 00:31:21.000
And so I’ve it’s it it was a

00:31:21.000 –> 00:31:23.000
a challenge to me because my my mind

00:31:23.000 –> 00:31:25.000
is usually always in the clouds. Like, it’s

00:31:25.000 –> 00:31:27.000
it’s I’m always thinking of different things, and

00:31:27.000 –> 00:31:29.000
I’m not I’m usually I struggle to be

00:31:29.000 –> 00:31:30.000
wherever I am, right, to be present.

00:31:31.000 –> 00:31:33.000
And so I’ve tried to train myself to

00:31:33.000 –> 00:31:33.000
just be aware

00:31:34.000 –> 00:31:36.000
of what’s happening in the day to day

00:31:36.000 –> 00:31:38.000
moments, which is doing that daily newsletter has

00:31:38.000 –> 00:31:39.000
been a really good.

00:31:40.000 –> 00:31:42.000
It’s forced me to be aware because I’ve

00:31:42.000 –> 00:31:44.000
gotta have a story every day from from

00:31:44.000 –> 00:31:46.000
somewhere, you know. Yep. So I think just

00:31:46.000 –> 00:31:48.000
observing people, trying to be present,

00:31:48.000 –> 00:31:50.000
trying to ask a lot of questions of

00:31:50.000 –> 00:31:52.000
people. And I think I try to follow,

00:31:53.000 –> 00:31:55.000
say the right people, but interesting people on

00:31:55.000 –> 00:31:57.000
social media. So, yeah, I’ve got my sports

00:31:57.000 –> 00:31:59.000
feed, but I also wanna follow leaders from

00:31:59.000 –> 00:32:01.000
a variety of areas

00:32:02.000 –> 00:32:03.000
because that that’s the beauty of me for

00:32:03.000 –> 00:32:04.000
social media. It’s like, I can learn from

00:32:04.000 –> 00:32:06.000
some of the best leaders on the planet

00:32:06.000 –> 00:32:08.000
because they’re sharing their stories, their wisdom for

00:32:08.000 –> 00:32:10.000
free. You know, you’re getting a master class

00:32:10.000 –> 00:32:12.000
from these people. I think trying to trying

00:32:12.000 –> 00:32:13.000
to follow business leaders,

00:32:14.000 –> 00:32:16.000
certain industry leaders on social media, not honestly,

00:32:16.000 –> 00:32:18.000
read the right books, but but read books

00:32:18.000 –> 00:32:19.000
that are,

00:32:20.000 –> 00:32:22.000
that that provide unique perspective.

00:32:22.000 –> 00:32:25.000
Yeah. Who any go to leaders you’d recommend

00:32:25.000 –> 00:32:27.000
following and put out some good content?

00:32:27.000 –> 00:32:29.000
Oh gosh. I knew you were gonna ask

00:32:29.000 –> 00:32:29.000
that.

00:32:30.000 –> 00:32:33.000
I think besides you, of course. Yeah.

00:32:33.000 –> 00:32:36.000
I think Mark Cuban is a fascinating follow.

00:32:37.000 –> 00:32:38.000
On We think we think his deal. What’s

00:32:38.000 –> 00:32:40.000
his next play? So if I’m I’m getting

00:32:40.000 –> 00:32:42.000
off Shark Tank. I’m selling part of the

00:32:42.000 –> 00:32:44.000
was it fifty seven percent of the Mavericks.

00:32:45.000 –> 00:32:47.000
What’s the next play?

00:32:47.000 –> 00:32:49.000
And I I saw where he told someone

00:32:49.000 –> 00:32:52.000
he’s not gonna run for political office,

00:32:52.000 –> 00:32:54.000
but I bet he runs for political office.

00:32:54.000 –> 00:32:56.000
Yeah. That’s I’ve said that too. Or or

00:32:56.000 –> 00:32:59.000
something something in that realm because it just

00:32:59.000 –> 00:33:00.000
doesn’t make sense. I mean,

00:33:01.000 –> 00:33:03.000
you know, guys like that could always start

00:33:03.000 –> 00:33:05.000
any kind of, you know, they could start

00:33:05.000 –> 00:33:06.000
a business tomorrow, do whatever they want. But

00:33:06.000 –> 00:33:08.000
he’s because he’s got that,

00:33:08.000 –> 00:33:10.000
some kind of health care prescription thing that

00:33:10.000 –> 00:33:12.000
he’s doing as well, trying to create low

00:33:12.000 –> 00:33:14.000
cost prescriptions for people.

00:33:15.000 –> 00:33:16.000
But I would I would guess that that

00:33:16.000 –> 00:33:19.000
he’s he’s gonna run for something or get

00:33:19.000 –> 00:33:22.000
involved and in politics in in some way,

00:33:22.000 –> 00:33:23.000
shape, or form. Yeah.

00:33:24.000 –> 00:33:27.000
Yeah. He’s always an interesting one. I love

00:33:27.000 –> 00:33:28.000
following tech entrepreneurs.

00:33:30.000 –> 00:33:31.000
Like, I named David Sachs that I that

00:33:31.000 –> 00:33:32.000
I enjoy following.

00:33:35.000 –> 00:33:37.000
I love I love following journalists. Like, the

00:33:37.000 –> 00:33:40.000
media is just a fascinating industry. For me.

00:33:41.000 –> 00:33:43.000
I shouldn’t say journalists. I should say media

00:33:43.000 –> 00:33:45.000
personalities, like people who comment on the media.

00:33:46.000 –> 00:33:47.000
Maybe they’re a part of it, but they’re

00:33:47.000 –> 00:33:49.000
not just writing journalism pieces, but they like

00:33:49.000 –> 00:33:50.000
to comment on the state of of the

00:33:50.000 –> 00:33:51.000
media.

00:33:51.000 –> 00:33:53.000
I think the world’s just it’s an interesting

00:33:53.000 –> 00:33:54.000
place, you know.

00:33:55.000 –> 00:33:57.000
There’s there’s a lot. And I and I

00:33:57.000 –> 00:33:59.000
try to follow people I don’t agree with.

00:34:00.000 –> 00:34:02.000
And just to get to always have a

00:34:02.000 –> 00:34:04.000
different perspective. I think part of social media

00:34:04.000 –> 00:34:04.000
is they can easily be an echo chamber

00:34:04.000 –> 00:34:04.000
of, people reinforcing what you already

00:34:07.000 –> 00:34:09.000
think. As long as people are respectful,

00:34:10.000 –> 00:34:12.000
I always wanna follow-up with people who have

00:34:12.000 –> 00:34:14.000
a different opinion, different perspective, come at it

00:34:14.000 –> 00:34:15.000
from a different side.

00:34:16.000 –> 00:34:17.000
Now if they’re gonna, you know, scream and

00:34:17.000 –> 00:34:18.000
yell call people names, like, well, that’s not

00:34:18.000 –> 00:34:20.000
necessary. But I like to I like to

00:34:20.000 –> 00:34:22.000
follow people that I don’t necessarily agree with

00:34:22.000 –> 00:34:24.000
as well. You know, get a little get

00:34:24.000 –> 00:34:25.000
a counter intuitive,

00:34:26.000 –> 00:34:27.000
stuff here that we’re we’re one of the

00:34:27.000 –> 00:34:29.000
questions I was gonna ask you is what

00:34:29.000 –> 00:34:32.000
is something that’s counter intuitive to anybody else

00:34:32.000 –> 00:34:34.000
would believe, but you know that it works,

00:34:34.000 –> 00:34:36.000
and you and you believe it to your

00:34:36.000 –> 00:34:37.000
core. Is there anything that comes to mind

00:34:37.000 –> 00:34:38.000
for you?

00:34:41.000 –> 00:34:43.000
That was a great question. How do I

00:34:43.000 –> 00:34:45.000
actually wanna answer that?

00:34:49.000 –> 00:34:51.000
This shouldn’t be an answer to that question,

00:34:51.000 –> 00:34:53.000
but I think in twenty twenty three, twenty

00:34:53.000 –> 00:34:54.000
twenty four, it is, is

00:34:55.000 –> 00:34:56.000
that

00:34:57.000 –> 00:34:58.000
hard work will get you most of what

00:34:58.000 –> 00:34:59.000
you want.

00:34:59.000 –> 00:35:00.000
I’ve

00:35:00.000 –> 00:35:02.000
I think in today’s world, we just think

00:35:02.000 –> 00:35:03.000
things are gonna be handed to us and

00:35:03.000 –> 00:35:05.000
that we can do average work.

00:35:05.000 –> 00:35:08.000
And I give average effort and expect great

00:35:08.000 –> 00:35:11.000
things. And I think if if you want

00:35:11.000 –> 00:35:13.000
more, you actually have to do more. And

00:35:13.000 –> 00:35:13.000
that’s not

00:35:14.000 –> 00:35:16.000
you know, I’m not saying to buy into

00:35:16.000 –> 00:35:17.000
the hustle culture. I’m not saying you gotta

00:35:17.000 –> 00:35:19.000
do seventy, eighty hours a week. That’s, you

00:35:19.000 –> 00:35:21.000
know, that’s a great great way to to

00:35:21.000 –> 00:35:23.000
live a life of burnout. But, you know,

00:35:23.000 –> 00:35:24.000
if you if you think of, you know,

00:35:24.000 –> 00:35:26.000
my fourteen year old

00:35:26.000 –> 00:35:27.000
freshman basketball team,

00:35:28.000 –> 00:35:30.000
like, hey, if if you wanna get better,

00:35:30.000 –> 00:35:32.000
you have to practice when other people don’t.

00:35:33.000 –> 00:35:35.000
You practice every day when the team practices.

00:35:35.000 –> 00:35:37.000
That means you’re getting better at the same

00:35:37.000 –> 00:35:39.000
rate, generally speaking, the same rate of improvement

00:35:39.000 –> 00:35:41.000
as everybody else on the team. Well, if

00:35:41.000 –> 00:35:43.000
this guy is better than you and you’re

00:35:43.000 –> 00:35:45.000
practicing the same amount, he’s always gonna be

00:35:45.000 –> 00:35:46.000
better than you. But what if you came

00:35:46.000 –> 00:35:49.000
home and got in fifteen minutes? Fifteen minutes

00:35:49.000 –> 00:35:49.000
a day.

00:35:50.000 –> 00:35:52.000
Yep. That’s ninety one hours a year. How

00:35:53.000 –> 00:35:54.000
what what kind of difference would that make

00:35:54.000 –> 00:35:56.000
in your skill set? And so the same

00:35:56.000 –> 00:35:57.000
thing for a leader, same thing for an

00:35:57.000 –> 00:35:59.000
entrepreneur, same thing for whatever it may be,

00:35:59.000 –> 00:36:01.000
like, you actually have to do more. I

00:36:01.000 –> 00:36:01.000
think we’ve

00:36:02.000 –> 00:36:05.000
be because that kind of mindset was abused

00:36:05.000 –> 00:36:07.000
for for most of time, like, to to

00:36:07.000 –> 00:36:08.000
to burn people out and force people to

00:36:08.000 –> 00:36:10.000
work forty, fifty, sixty, eighty hour weeks, whatever.

00:36:11.000 –> 00:36:13.000
People push back the pendulum went all the

00:36:13.000 –> 00:36:15.000
way over here. They’re like, no. No. You

00:36:15.000 –> 00:36:16.000
just work thirty hours a week. It’ll be

00:36:16.000 –> 00:36:18.000
okay. Just hope for Like, no, I hope

00:36:18.000 –> 00:36:19.000
it’s a it’s a great fuel, but a

00:36:19.000 –> 00:36:21.000
terrible strategy. You actually have to work your

00:36:21.000 –> 00:36:23.000
tail off. If you if you wanna get

00:36:23.000 –> 00:36:25.000
things, you’ve gotta be willing to sacrifice

00:36:26.000 –> 00:36:28.000
And I think at some times, some seasons,

00:36:28.000 –> 00:36:30.000
that means you’re actually out of balance.

00:36:31.000 –> 00:36:33.000
You don’t want a life that’s out So

00:36:33.000 –> 00:36:34.000
I think for a season, if you wanna

00:36:34.000 –> 00:36:36.000
get to certain areas, you’ve gotta say, you’ve

00:36:36.000 –> 00:36:38.000
gotta shut out not everything, but almost everything,

00:36:38.000 –> 00:36:40.000
say, I’m going all in after this thing.

00:36:40.000 –> 00:36:41.000
And people are gonna say, you’re crazy. And

00:36:41.000 –> 00:36:43.000
then a year later, say, well, Maybe I

00:36:43.000 –> 00:36:45.000
was, but look what I accomplished because of

00:36:45.000 –> 00:36:45.000
that.

00:36:46.000 –> 00:36:47.000
Yeah. I agree, man. It does it goes

00:36:47.000 –> 00:36:49.000
in waves, doesn’t it? It just it’s sometimes

00:36:49.000 –> 00:36:51.000
you’re gonna be working family life more, sometimes

00:36:51.000 –> 00:36:54.000
you’re working at working. So but it’s gotta

00:36:54.000 –> 00:36:56.000
be somewhat balanced if if there is such

00:36:56.000 –> 00:36:56.000
a thing.

00:36:57.000 –> 00:36:59.000
If if I were to ask your team

00:36:59.000 –> 00:36:59.000
right now,

00:37:00.000 –> 00:37:02.000
you know, people that work for you. What

00:37:02.000 –> 00:37:03.000
what would they say

00:37:04.000 –> 00:37:06.000
you do well that helps build culture for

00:37:06.000 –> 00:37:07.000
your company?

00:37:08.000 –> 00:37:09.000
I think energy.

00:37:10.000 –> 00:37:13.000
I I think by nature, I’ve just always

00:37:13.000 –> 00:37:13.000
been,

00:37:15.000 –> 00:37:16.000
I don’t know, but by nature. Like, I’ve

00:37:16.000 –> 00:37:18.000
just always been a positive energy person. I’m

00:37:18.000 –> 00:37:20.000
an optimist. I tend to believe things are

00:37:20.000 –> 00:37:21.000
gonna work out.

00:37:22.000 –> 00:37:23.000
I’m not super serious.

00:37:24.000 –> 00:37:25.000
It’s interesting because I’ve I’ve

00:37:26.000 –> 00:37:28.000
just kinda go a different direction. But,

00:37:28.000 –> 00:37:29.000
you know, when I when I was in

00:37:29.000 –> 00:37:31.000
the corporate world, I was a goofy guy.

00:37:31.000 –> 00:37:33.000
We’d close a deal, and I’d run-in, like,

00:37:33.000 –> 00:37:35.000
fist pumping and yelling and just being goofy.

00:37:35.000 –> 00:37:37.000
Like, I just never took things super super

00:37:37.000 –> 00:37:38.000
serious,

00:37:38.000 –> 00:37:40.000
and we were unbelievably successful. Like, I was

00:37:40.000 –> 00:37:42.000
number two in the company in sales, like,

00:37:42.000 –> 00:37:44.000
and I wasn’t your typical,

00:37:44.000 –> 00:37:47.000
you know, buttoned up, super serious business minded

00:37:47.000 –> 00:37:49.000
salesperson. I just had fun and loved people.

00:37:50.000 –> 00:37:52.000
When I started in business, I don’t know

00:37:52.000 –> 00:37:54.000
if anybody said it to me or if

00:37:54.000 –> 00:37:56.000
I assumed they said it to me or

00:37:56.000 –> 00:37:57.000
if I just took on this belief,

00:37:58.000 –> 00:38:00.000
because people always say, man, you know, Kevin,

00:38:00.000 –> 00:38:02.000
he’s just not super serious, and he’s not

00:38:02.000 –> 00:38:03.000
that organized, and he’s not that into the

00:38:03.000 –> 00:38:04.000
details.

00:38:04.000 –> 00:38:07.000
And I I wore that as people don’t

00:38:07.000 –> 00:38:08.000
think I can be successful. Don’t think I

00:38:08.000 –> 00:38:09.000
can do this on my own. They don’t

00:38:09.000 –> 00:38:11.000
think I can build a business. And so

00:38:11.000 –> 00:38:14.000
I shut down kind of the goofy part

00:38:14.000 –> 00:38:15.000
of me for a long time.

00:38:16.000 –> 00:38:18.000
And that it’s called the quote unquote, unserious

00:38:18.000 –> 00:38:19.000
part of me to the point that people

00:38:20.000 –> 00:38:21.000
we do a lot with personality in our

00:38:21.000 –> 00:38:23.000
businesses. People are like, oh, I don’t actually

00:38:23.000 –> 00:38:24.000
think you are this personality. I’m like, no.

00:38:24.000 –> 00:38:25.000
No. No. I just want. I’ve been under

00:38:25.000 –> 00:38:27.000
stress for a decade trying to build. And

00:38:27.000 –> 00:38:30.000
then, two, I’ve just recently realized I believed

00:38:30.000 –> 00:38:31.000
to lie or whatever,

00:38:31.000 –> 00:38:33.000
a limiting belief that I had to be

00:38:33.000 –> 00:38:35.000
this way to be successful.

00:38:35.000 –> 00:38:36.000
And so I’ve just kinda been coming out

00:38:36.000 –> 00:38:39.000
of that shell again the last year or

00:38:39.000 –> 00:38:39.000
two.

00:38:40.000 –> 00:38:41.000
I’m like, no. No. No. Like, I love

00:38:41.000 –> 00:38:43.000
to have fun. Like, you can have fun.

00:38:43.000 –> 00:38:44.000
You don’t have to be

00:38:45.000 –> 00:38:47.000
serious and and all these things to be

00:38:47.000 –> 00:38:49.000
successful. Like, you can you can have big

00:38:49.000 –> 00:38:51.000
dreams, and you can be goofy, and you

00:38:51.000 –> 00:38:52.000
can make people laugh, and

00:38:53.000 –> 00:38:55.000
You can inject comedy in certain situations, and

00:38:55.000 –> 00:38:56.000
maybe it’s not you don’t always need to

00:38:56.000 –> 00:38:58.000
inject. Like, there’s a time to be serious,

00:38:58.000 –> 00:38:58.000
but,

00:38:59.000 –> 00:39:01.000
I think people just say, like, generally, I

00:39:01.000 –> 00:39:02.000
bring I bring fun.

00:39:02.000 –> 00:39:04.000
Yeah. So that was one of my biggest

00:39:04.000 –> 00:39:06.000
learnings when I looked back at my career,

00:39:06.000 –> 00:39:08.000
you know, twenty two years in the wealth

00:39:08.000 –> 00:39:10.000
management space. And so

00:39:11.000 –> 00:39:13.000
when I was this young the young Brett

00:39:13.000 –> 00:39:14.000
would go take some of the older guys

00:39:14.000 –> 00:39:16.000
with him to meetings to try to learn.

00:39:16.000 –> 00:39:17.000
Right? And then I would just I thought

00:39:17.000 –> 00:39:19.000
I had to live in this just like

00:39:19.000 –> 00:39:21.000
what you were just saying. And and as

00:39:21.000 –> 00:39:23.000
soon as I found out or I guess

00:39:23.000 –> 00:39:24.000
I shouldn’t say found out. As soon as

00:39:24.000 –> 00:39:26.000
I believed that I could be Brett and

00:39:26.000 –> 00:39:28.000
to your point, have fun and and laugh

00:39:28.000 –> 00:39:29.000
a lot at work. It hadn’t been that’d

00:39:29.000 –> 00:39:30.000
be so damn serious.

00:39:31.000 –> 00:39:32.000
It’s an amazing. That’s when I started to

00:39:32.000 –> 00:39:34.000
find myself becoming more and more successful.

00:39:35.000 –> 00:39:37.000
Yeah. You well, you you find yourself being

00:39:37.000 –> 00:39:39.000
more successful Gilliland then you actually have fun

00:39:39.000 –> 00:39:41.000
being successful. Right?

00:39:41.000 –> 00:39:42.000
Wait a hell of a lot more. Like,

00:39:42.000 –> 00:39:43.000
because you can have six you can have

00:39:43.000 –> 00:39:45.000
success the other way or or a limited

00:39:45.000 –> 00:39:47.000
version of success, but you’re miserable all the

00:39:47.000 –> 00:39:48.000
time because you’re always feel like you’re trying

00:39:48.000 –> 00:39:49.000
to be someone you’re not. I was like,

00:39:49.000 –> 00:39:50.000
wait a minute. No. I can be me.

00:39:50.000 –> 00:39:52.000
And succeed. I don’t need to beat the

00:39:52.000 –> 00:39:53.000
and I, you know, again, we talk a

00:39:53.000 –> 00:39:55.000
lot about personality. Like, we’ve got kind of

00:39:55.000 –> 00:39:57.000
a right hand and left hand. I’m typically

00:39:57.000 –> 00:39:59.000
this part, you know, goofy, loud, fun, whatever.

00:40:00.000 –> 00:40:01.000
But there’s a part of me that can

00:40:01.000 –> 00:40:03.000
be serious that can be locked in that

00:40:03.000 –> 00:40:05.000
can be quote unquote professional, whatever that means.

00:40:05.000 –> 00:40:07.000
But for me to live there means I

00:40:07.000 –> 00:40:10.000
lose who I act actually am. And so

00:40:10.000 –> 00:40:12.000
trying to find that balance of, like, okay.

00:40:12.000 –> 00:40:13.000
When can I be me and when do

00:40:13.000 –> 00:40:15.000
I not need to be me? And how

00:40:15.000 –> 00:40:16.000
do I make that operate so that that

00:40:16.000 –> 00:40:20.000
everyone around me actually wins. Yep. Yep. So

00:40:20.000 –> 00:40:21.000
you can see this sticker right here, this

00:40:21.000 –> 00:40:23.000
f greater than p. I do. Yeah. Yeah.

00:40:24.000 –> 00:40:26.000
Our our mission is helping people achieve a

00:40:26.000 –> 00:40:28.000
future great in your past. And so it

00:40:28.000 –> 00:40:30.000
doesn’t mean that, you know, you had a

00:40:30.000 –> 00:40:31.000
bad past.

00:40:31.000 –> 00:40:33.000
But when you hear that, achieving a future

00:40:33.000 –> 00:40:35.000
greater than your past, what comes to mind

00:40:35.000 –> 00:40:36.000
for you?

00:40:38.000 –> 00:40:39.000
Oh, man. Well, I love it because I

00:40:39.000 –> 00:40:41.000
was actually wondering, like, I haven’t seen that

00:40:41.000 –> 00:40:43.000
on any of email, like, the soft company.

00:40:43.000 –> 00:40:45.000
I’m like, okay.

00:40:45.000 –> 00:40:47.000
Some so I am glad you brought that

00:40:47.000 –> 00:40:48.000
up because that’s good because that’s actually bothered

00:40:48.000 –> 00:40:49.000
me for a long time.

00:40:50.000 –> 00:40:52.000
No. That’s that’s good. Future greater than your

00:40:52.000 –> 00:40:53.000
past.

00:40:53.000 –> 00:40:56.000
I think for me that speaks hope to

00:40:56.000 –> 00:40:57.000
Gilliland

00:40:57.000 –> 00:40:59.000
I said earlier, right, hope is is is

00:40:59.000 –> 00:41:01.000
not a strategy, but it is great fuel.

00:41:02.000 –> 00:41:04.000
And I think if people are fueled by

00:41:04.000 –> 00:41:06.000
hope that it like you said, Does today

00:41:06.000 –> 00:41:08.000
could be good, but tomorrow could be even

00:41:08.000 –> 00:41:10.000
better. Mhmm. Doesn’t mean you have to have

00:41:10.000 –> 00:41:11.000
a terrible pass that you’re going through some

00:41:11.000 –> 00:41:14.000
stuff today, like, maybe you are. It certainly

00:41:14.000 –> 00:41:15.000
helps in those seasons. Right? If if things

00:41:15.000 –> 00:41:17.000
are difficult, like, hey, things can be better

00:41:17.000 –> 00:41:19.000
tomorrow. Whatever today is, things can be better

00:41:19.000 –> 00:41:19.000
tomorrow.

00:41:20.000 –> 00:41:22.000
But I think whatever season are in good

00:41:22.000 –> 00:41:23.000
season, tough season,

00:41:24.000 –> 00:41:27.000
seasons of, of abundance seasons where things are

00:41:27.000 –> 00:41:29.000
a little bit scarce. It’s like, hey, whatever

00:41:29.000 –> 00:41:30.000
season

00:41:30.000 –> 00:41:32.000
your future can is actually unlimited if you

00:41:32.000 –> 00:41:35.000
wanna create it. And and not in, you

00:41:35.000 –> 00:41:36.000
know, necessarily materialistic

00:41:36.000 –> 00:41:38.000
type sense, but, like, you can have a

00:41:38.000 –> 00:41:40.000
better tomorrow if you actually want to. And

00:41:40.000 –> 00:41:41.000
I think most people,

00:41:42.000 –> 00:41:44.000
I think most people have lost that. I

00:41:44.000 –> 00:41:47.000
don’t think people believe generally speaking anymore.

00:41:47.000 –> 00:41:49.000
They don’t believe that tomorrow can be better

00:41:49.000 –> 00:41:51.000
than today. I think people are stuck, and

00:41:51.000 –> 00:41:53.000
they feel like they’re always going to be

00:41:53.000 –> 00:41:55.000
stuck. Yeah. And they just get on this

00:41:55.000 –> 00:41:57.000
hamster wheel frustration and say, I don’t know.

00:41:57.000 –> 00:42:00.000
When you actually have so we have this

00:42:00.000 –> 00:42:01.000
to was this tool we use. We didn’t

00:42:01.000 –> 00:42:03.000
create it, but it’s called the the the

00:42:03.000 –> 00:42:03.000
change equation.

00:42:04.000 –> 00:42:05.000
And part of it is saying,

00:42:06.000 –> 00:42:08.000
you know, where what where’s your dissatisfaction

00:42:09.000 –> 00:42:11.000
in life? What are you dissatisfied with? Could

00:42:11.000 –> 00:42:12.000
be your finances, could be your family, could

00:42:12.000 –> 00:42:14.000
be your career, could be your health,

00:42:15.000 –> 00:42:16.000
could be relationships,

00:42:16.000 –> 00:42:18.000
could be a number of things. And and

00:42:18.000 –> 00:42:20.000
how dissatisfied are you, like, one to ten

00:42:20.000 –> 00:42:21.000
it’s like a one or a two, it’s

00:42:21.000 –> 00:42:24.000
like, okay. You’re not dissatisfied. You’re annoyed. You

00:42:24.000 –> 00:42:25.000
know, just get it stop complaining and move

00:42:25.000 –> 00:42:27.000
on. It’s an eight or a nine. It’s

00:42:27.000 –> 00:42:29.000
like, okay. We gotta do some surgery. Like,

00:42:29.000 –> 00:42:31.000
there’s some there’s some actual pain. So if

00:42:31.000 –> 00:42:34.000
you’re dissatisfaction, let’s say let’s say finances or

00:42:34.000 –> 00:42:35.000
your health, you’re an eight,

00:42:36.000 –> 00:42:38.000
What’s your vision? What’s your specific vision for

00:42:38.000 –> 00:42:38.000
that area? For for finances, your health, relationship,

00:42:38.000 –> 00:42:38.000
career? Most people, when when your vision is

00:42:38.000 –> 00:42:39.000
lower than

00:42:45.000 –> 00:42:46.000
your satisfaction,

00:42:47.000 –> 00:42:49.000
you get frustration, you get bitterness, you get

00:42:49.000 –> 00:42:51.000
discontent, you get anxiety, and that’s where most

00:42:51.000 –> 00:42:53.000
people are. You look around. Most people are

00:42:53.000 –> 00:42:54.000
are dissatisfied

00:42:54.000 –> 00:42:56.000
but they don’t have a vision of what

00:42:56.000 –> 00:42:58.000
could be. And so they’re stuck. Well, when

00:42:58.000 –> 00:43:00.000
your vision is higher than your dissatisfaction, well,

00:43:00.000 –> 00:43:02.000
then you have ambition, you have motivation,

00:43:03.000 –> 00:43:04.000
it’s saying like, hey, I’m at base camp

00:43:04.000 –> 00:43:06.000
at Mount Everest. I’m trying to get to

00:43:06.000 –> 00:43:07.000
the top. I’m not there yet,

00:43:08.000 –> 00:43:09.000
but I at least know where I’m going.

00:43:09.000 –> 00:43:11.000
And so you wake up every day with

00:43:11.000 –> 00:43:13.000
a direction that you wanna Gilliland

00:43:13.000 –> 00:43:15.000
so that that’s what I hear, what I

00:43:15.000 –> 00:43:16.000
see, when I see see future over your

00:43:16.000 –> 00:43:17.000
past, like,

00:43:17.000 –> 00:43:19.000
yeah, you’ve gotta have a Gilliland and a

00:43:19.000 –> 00:43:21.000
vision and a hope. And when you have

00:43:21.000 –> 00:43:23.000
that, anything’s possible. Yep. And I love that

00:43:23.000 –> 00:43:25.000
because it makes me think when we started

00:43:25.000 –> 00:43:28.000
our firm visionary wealth advisors that that so

00:43:28.000 –> 00:43:31.000
it’ll be ten years, in March. And

00:43:32.000 –> 00:43:35.000
that previous spot, as I was becoming more

00:43:35.000 –> 00:43:36.000
successful,

00:43:36.000 –> 00:43:38.000
right? Mhmm. My job satisfaction

00:43:38.000 –> 00:43:41.000
was going down. And Yeah. And then but

00:43:41.000 –> 00:43:43.000
we made this change to your point.

00:43:43.000 –> 00:43:46.000
Is it the Gilliland division was greater, right,

00:43:46.000 –> 00:43:47.000
than where we And so,

00:43:48.000 –> 00:43:50.000
it did. It fueled fire. It fueled energy.

00:43:50.000 –> 00:43:53.000
It fueled passion. But also, for me, personally,

00:43:53.000 –> 00:43:55.000
it it is basically

00:43:55.000 –> 00:43:58.000
you know, minimized to almost hardly anything, my

00:43:58.000 –> 00:44:00.000
anxiety, and my stress, and and Right. And

00:44:00.000 –> 00:44:02.000
so that happiness. And so it doesn’t ever

00:44:02.000 –> 00:44:04.000
mean it’s the right time because it wasn’t

00:44:04.000 –> 00:44:06.000
time. We were my wife was pregnant with

00:44:06.000 –> 00:44:09.000
our fourth child, built a new home. And

00:44:09.000 –> 00:44:10.000
so people have to

00:44:10.000 –> 00:44:13.000
think about those things, but take risks sometimes.

00:44:13.000 –> 00:44:14.000
Man, and you gotta bet on yourself, and

00:44:14.000 –> 00:44:16.000
you gotta go do it. So so I’m

00:44:16.000 –> 00:44:18.000
curious. I I’ve never done this before, but

00:44:18.000 –> 00:44:19.000
I’m gonna start doing this. I think I

00:44:19.000 –> 00:44:21.000
had this, pop in my mind. So the

00:44:21.000 –> 00:44:23.000
circuit of success, hence the podcast you’re on

00:44:23.000 –> 00:44:25.000
here. Yeah. The circuits of success are attitude,

00:44:26.000 –> 00:44:26.000
your beliefs,

00:44:27.000 –> 00:44:28.000
action,

00:44:28.000 –> 00:44:31.000
results. Right? So your attitude, your belief system,

00:44:31.000 –> 00:44:33.000
the action take, get your results. So when

00:44:33.000 –> 00:44:35.000
you hear those four, which one of those

00:44:35.000 –> 00:44:37.000
does dive deep into one of? Which word

00:44:37.000 –> 00:44:39.000
do you like? Attitude, beliefs, action, results?

00:44:40.000 –> 00:44:43.000
I think belief for me is the most

00:44:43.000 –> 00:44:44.000
powerful force in the world.

00:44:45.000 –> 00:44:47.000
You know, like that one for me trumps

00:44:47.000 –> 00:44:49.000
all of it.

00:44:49.000 –> 00:44:51.000
Meaning if if

00:44:52.000 –> 00:44:54.000
So you started the company because you believed

00:44:54.000 –> 00:44:56.000
success was possible. Mhmm. If you didn’t believe

00:44:56.000 –> 00:44:58.000
in it, you wouldn’t have done it. And

00:44:58.000 –> 00:44:59.000
that doesn’t mean you believed in it every

00:44:59.000 –> 00:45:01.000
single day. Right? We’re we’re human. We we

00:45:01.000 –> 00:45:03.000
have those moments of doubt and fear.

00:45:04.000 –> 00:45:07.000
But, like, the the car you drive that

00:45:07.000 –> 00:45:10.000
car exists because somebody believed it was possible.

00:45:10.000 –> 00:45:12.000
That car manufacturer exists because somebody thought I’m

00:45:12.000 –> 00:45:15.000
gonna I’m gonna create this. And the the

00:45:15.000 –> 00:45:17.000
school you went to, the town you’re from,

00:45:17.000 –> 00:45:19.000
All these things exist because somebody believed in

00:45:19.000 –> 00:45:21.000
it enough to take action. There may have

00:45:21.000 –> 00:45:23.000
been been several. It may have been hundreds

00:45:23.000 –> 00:45:24.000
of people who believed.

00:45:24.000 –> 00:45:25.000
I think it’s possible.

00:45:25.000 –> 00:45:27.000
But doubt eventually went out, and they didn’t

00:45:27.000 –> 00:45:29.000
figure out a way to create a university,

00:45:29.000 –> 00:45:31.000
to create a business, to create a car,

00:45:31.000 –> 00:45:33.000
to create a clothing brand, whatever it may

00:45:33.000 –> 00:45:33.000
be.

00:45:34.000 –> 00:45:36.000
Everything around us is created because somebody believed

00:45:36.000 –> 00:45:39.000
in it enough to actually take action on

00:45:39.000 –> 00:45:40.000
on those beliefs.

00:45:41.000 –> 00:45:43.000
And so I would say belief belief drives

00:45:43.000 –> 00:45:43.000
behavior.

00:45:44.000 –> 00:45:46.000
And belief will look for a way forward

00:45:46.000 –> 00:45:48.000
where doubt will look for a way out.

00:45:48.000 –> 00:45:50.000
And I think most people in life, right,

00:45:50.000 –> 00:45:52.000
we get on this path, early on, we

00:45:52.000 –> 00:45:54.000
believe our belief is high. Starting business, whatever

00:45:54.000 –> 00:45:55.000
it is. Like, man, this can be awesome.

00:45:55.000 –> 00:45:56.000
We can do it because we have no

00:45:56.000 –> 00:45:58.000
clue what that road’s gonna look like. We

00:45:58.000 –> 00:45:59.000
just think, like, Sarah, we think success is

00:45:59.000 –> 00:46:02.000
gonna go this way. We don’t anticipate all

00:46:02.000 –> 00:46:04.000
this this roundabout and chaos in in the

00:46:04.000 –> 00:46:05.000
middle of it.

00:46:05.000 –> 00:46:07.000
But for the people who who in the

00:46:07.000 –> 00:46:09.000
midst of that standard, I still I still

00:46:09.000 –> 00:46:10.000
believe in this thing that chose to run

00:46:10.000 –> 00:46:12.000
after. I still believe it’s possible. For me,

00:46:12.000 –> 00:46:13.000
it’s like

00:46:13.000 –> 00:46:15.000
going down, the highway,

00:46:16.000 –> 00:46:18.000
and there’s all these off ramps it’s gonna

00:46:18.000 –> 00:46:20.000
be hard, you might fail. They’re gonna laugh

00:46:20.000 –> 00:46:22.000
at you. You’re gonna lose everything. Like, whatever

00:46:22.000 –> 00:46:24.000
all the excuses the fears are, and if

00:46:24.000 –> 00:46:27.000
you if doubt is greater, as soon as

00:46:27.000 –> 00:46:28.000
you face a little bit of adversity,

00:46:29.000 –> 00:46:31.000
doubts, like, you’re right. I might fail. See

00:46:31.000 –> 00:46:33.000
you. I’m out. I’m gonna quit before I

00:46:33.000 –> 00:46:35.000
fail. And most people, they just they they

00:46:35.000 –> 00:46:37.000
have a life it’s almost like they’re just

00:46:37.000 –> 00:46:38.000
driving in a circle. Right? They get on

00:46:38.000 –> 00:46:40.000
be on the highway. Like, I believe it’s

00:46:40.000 –> 00:46:41.000
gonna be great.

00:46:41.000 –> 00:46:43.000
It gets hard. Oh, my might fail, and

00:46:43.000 –> 00:46:45.000
they get off. In the circle right back

00:46:45.000 –> 00:46:46.000
around and get on the next path. Oh,

00:46:46.000 –> 00:46:48.000
this is gonna be great. This is the

00:46:48.000 –> 00:46:49.000
one. It gets hard, and they take the

00:46:49.000 –> 00:46:51.000
next off ramp, and they just keep circling

00:46:51.000 –> 00:46:51.000
around.

00:46:52.000 –> 00:46:54.000
There’s people who believe, like, might be hard.

00:46:54.000 –> 00:46:56.000
That’s okay. I might fail. That’s okay. They

00:46:56.000 –> 00:46:58.000
might laugh at me. That’s okay. Because that

00:46:58.000 –> 00:47:00.000
belief is greater than their doubt, and, like,

00:47:00.000 –> 00:47:02.000
I’m gonna go figure out what’s possible. You

00:47:02.000 –> 00:47:03.000
know, and so I for me, I just

00:47:03.000 –> 00:47:06.000
think belief is such a powerful force. Yeah.

00:47:06.000 –> 00:47:08.000
Amen into that. So my final question on

00:47:08.000 –> 00:47:11.000
that, and, would be then belief in self,

00:47:11.000 –> 00:47:12.000
you know, I believe in a higher powers.

00:47:12.000 –> 00:47:14.000
Well, I believe in god. I believe in

00:47:14.000 –> 00:47:16.000
self. I believe in goal management or goal

00:47:16.000 –> 00:47:16.000
planning.

00:47:17.000 –> 00:47:19.000
Mhmm. Go achievement. All these things. Right? But

00:47:19.000 –> 00:47:20.000
The belief in yourself,

00:47:21.000 –> 00:47:23.000
how what would you recommend for people right

00:47:23.000 –> 00:47:25.000
now is to continue to grow that as

00:47:25.000 –> 00:47:25.000
much as possible. And there’s a fine line

00:47:25.000 –> 00:47:25.000
between arrogance

00:47:28.000 –> 00:47:30.000
and right? So how do we grow,

00:47:30.000 –> 00:47:31.000
in our belief in ourself?

00:47:33.000 –> 00:47:35.000
I think two things coming to mind. One,

00:47:35.000 –> 00:47:37.000
and then I know this gonna sound cheesy.

00:47:37.000 –> 00:47:40.000
So apologies to anyone listening, but cheesy works.

00:47:40.000 –> 00:47:42.000
One, I think, like, self affirmations.

00:47:43.000 –> 00:47:45.000
Like, I think think of the doubts that

00:47:45.000 –> 00:47:47.000
come in your mind. Like, write them down.

00:47:47.000 –> 00:47:48.000
I’m not good enough. I don’t have what

00:47:48.000 –> 00:47:49.000
it takes.

00:47:49.000 –> 00:47:52.000
People don’t believe in me. Whatever. All these

00:47:52.000 –> 00:47:53.000
lies that fill our brain

00:47:54.000 –> 00:47:56.000
that keep us from taking action. If you

00:47:56.000 –> 00:47:57.000
would write them down and write a truth

00:47:57.000 –> 00:48:00.000
next to it, like and or even write

00:48:00.000 –> 00:48:02.000
another column, of, like, who said that? Oh,

00:48:02.000 –> 00:48:03.000
nobody.

00:48:04.000 –> 00:48:06.000
Nobody said I would not get enough. Nobody

00:48:06.000 –> 00:48:07.000
said I can’t do it. Like, now maybe

00:48:07.000 –> 00:48:08.000
someone actually in your life, you know, you

00:48:08.000 –> 00:48:11.000
had some some jerk who put some negativity

00:48:11.000 –> 00:48:13.000
in in your mind, like Right. Most of

00:48:13.000 –> 00:48:14.000
the time, the person is us.

00:48:15.000 –> 00:48:18.000
And it’s like, oh, Well, okay. I’m the

00:48:18.000 –> 00:48:19.000
only person who said that, which means it’s

00:48:19.000 –> 00:48:21.000
not true. Well, what’s the truth of that?

00:48:21.000 –> 00:48:22.000
I am good enough. I do have what

00:48:22.000 –> 00:48:23.000
it takes.

00:48:23.000 –> 00:48:25.000
Whatever it may be, and so to to

00:48:25.000 –> 00:48:25.000
counter

00:48:26.000 –> 00:48:29.000
the lies with truth, and and that’s why

00:48:29.000 –> 00:48:30.000
I love, like, the power of belief in

00:48:30.000 –> 00:48:32.000
the brain. I’ve I’ve become just obsessed with

00:48:32.000 –> 00:48:34.000
the mind over the last, like, two years,

00:48:34.000 –> 00:48:35.000
three years,

00:48:35.000 –> 00:48:38.000
What what happens when you have a negative

00:48:38.000 –> 00:48:40.000
thought, it does actual brain damage.

00:48:41.000 –> 00:48:43.000
And so it weakens your brain. It weakens

00:48:43.000 –> 00:48:45.000
your brain’s ability to be innovative, to be

00:48:45.000 –> 00:48:47.000
creative, to be confident, to be focused, to

00:48:47.000 –> 00:48:50.000
be clear, to be calm. And so negativity

00:48:50.000 –> 00:48:52.000
does brain damage, which means you’re more likely

00:48:52.000 –> 00:48:54.000
to have more negative thoughts and does more

00:48:54.000 –> 00:48:55.000
brain damage. So,

00:48:56.000 –> 00:48:56.000
and when you have a positive thought, it

00:48:56.000 –> 00:48:57.000
it it strengthens your brain.

00:48:59.000 –> 00:49:02.000
Right? Positive thoughts re regenerate. They rebuild your

00:49:02.000 –> 00:49:04.000
brain to make you more confident, more clear,

00:49:04.000 –> 00:49:05.000
more creative, more innovative, more

00:49:07.000 –> 00:49:07.000
focused

00:49:07.000 –> 00:49:09.000
And so this idea of positive versus negative

00:49:09.000 –> 00:49:12.000
thinking, like, it’s actually changing. Your brain is

00:49:12.000 –> 00:49:12.000
not a,

00:49:13.000 –> 00:49:15.000
it’s not a a static thing. Right? It’s

00:49:15.000 –> 00:49:17.000
not fixed. It changes, and every thought is

00:49:17.000 –> 00:49:19.000
changing it. Your brain is it’s crazy. It’s

00:49:19.000 –> 00:49:21.000
like your our brain is

00:49:21.000 –> 00:49:23.000
a it it’s Gilliland.

00:49:23.000 –> 00:49:26.000
And fascinating, but it’s also very stupid. Your

00:49:26.000 –> 00:49:28.000
brain will believe whatever you tell it. Dings

00:49:28.000 –> 00:49:29.000
fast. That’s right.

00:49:30.000 –> 00:49:31.000
I think one, and you get to choose

00:49:31.000 –> 00:49:33.000
what you tell it. And so the more

00:49:33.000 –> 00:49:34.000
you practice, like and and so part of

00:49:34.000 –> 00:49:35.000
my morning routine,

00:49:36.000 –> 00:49:37.000
I’ve got mind body and soul. So I’ve

00:49:37.000 –> 00:49:39.000
got the the faith deal. I’ve got the

00:49:39.000 –> 00:49:40.000
workout.

00:49:40.000 –> 00:49:42.000
And then every day I write down ten

00:49:42.000 –> 00:49:43.000
things that I’m grateful for.

00:49:44.000 –> 00:49:45.000
And I started doing that during COVID when

00:49:45.000 –> 00:49:47.000
anxiety started to kick in a little bit.

00:49:48.000 –> 00:49:49.000
So I think number one is just some

00:49:49.000 –> 00:49:50.000
form of affirmations.

00:49:51.000 –> 00:49:53.000
You could even call these I’m statements. I

00:49:53.000 –> 00:49:54.000
I have a friend who she she works

00:49:54.000 –> 00:49:56.000
with the Air Force doing leadership training, and

00:49:56.000 –> 00:49:58.000
she was real nervous and insecure about it.

00:49:58.000 –> 00:50:00.000
She was real, like, sweet, quiet. So the

00:50:00.000 –> 00:50:01.000
moment, she’s like, what do I have to

00:50:01.000 –> 00:50:02.000
offer? She’s powerhouse.

00:50:03.000 –> 00:50:04.000
And so she put in her in her

00:50:04.000 –> 00:50:06.000
bone, like, every three hours, I’m confident.

00:50:07.000 –> 00:50:09.000
I’m a great leader. I have what it

00:50:09.000 –> 00:50:09.000
takes.

00:50:10.000 –> 00:50:12.000
And so it was just these reminders to

00:50:12.000 –> 00:50:13.000
her. And it started to reshape her brain

00:50:13.000 –> 00:50:15.000
to where she started to believe those things,

00:50:15.000 –> 00:50:17.000
then live those things. So number one, I

00:50:17.000 –> 00:50:19.000
think some form of self talk

00:50:19.000 –> 00:50:21.000
is really important. And I think number two

00:50:21.000 –> 00:50:24.000
is go go stack as many small successes

00:50:24.000 –> 00:50:26.000
as you possibly can. That could be going

00:50:26.000 –> 00:50:27.000
on a ten minute walk. That can be

00:50:27.000 –> 00:50:28.000
a success.

00:50:29.000 –> 00:50:31.000
It could be, what, like, having a difficult

00:50:31.000 –> 00:50:33.000
conversation. But but that builds confidence when you

00:50:33.000 –> 00:50:35.000
when you, you know, the other thing your

00:50:35.000 –> 00:50:37.000
brain does, If you have a hard task

00:50:37.000 –> 00:50:38.000
in front of you and you quit,

00:50:40.000 –> 00:50:42.000
it’s like railroad tracks are being laid in

00:50:42.000 –> 00:50:44.000
your brain. And when you quit, there’s a

00:50:44.000 –> 00:50:46.000
gap. The railroad tracks don’t finish.

00:50:46.000 –> 00:50:48.000
And so the next time you’re in a

00:50:48.000 –> 00:50:50.000
difficult situation, your brain doesn’t know how to

00:50:50.000 –> 00:50:51.000
finish the hard task. It’s like all it

00:50:51.000 –> 00:50:53.000
knows what to do is is to quit

00:50:54.000 –> 00:50:56.000
When you complete it, it it’s like it

00:50:56.000 –> 00:50:58.000
lays that railroad track and it finishes it.

00:50:58.000 –> 00:50:59.000
It completes the track. And so the next

00:50:59.000 –> 00:51:01.000
time you’re in a hard situation, your brain’s

00:51:01.000 –> 00:51:02.000
like, oh, I know what to do here.

00:51:02.000 –> 00:51:03.000
I know how to finish. I know how

00:51:03.000 –> 00:51:05.000
to do hard things, which is part of

00:51:05.000 –> 00:51:07.000
why, like, just the value of working out

00:51:07.000 –> 00:51:10.000
every day. It’s hard. It’s not fun. Most

00:51:10.000 –> 00:51:11.000
days I don’t wanna finish it. Like, this

00:51:11.000 –> 00:51:13.000
is killing me. I wanna Oh, I’m like,

00:51:13.000 –> 00:51:14.000
I’ve got five more minutes. I can do

00:51:14.000 –> 00:51:16.000
anything for five more minutes, whatever it is.

00:51:16.000 –> 00:51:18.000
But part of part of me doing that

00:51:18.000 –> 00:51:19.000
one is my own just physical health, but

00:51:19.000 –> 00:51:21.000
two training your brain to to deal with

00:51:21.000 –> 00:51:23.000
adversity to do hard things. And so those

00:51:23.000 –> 00:51:25.000
things build confidence when you need confidence.

00:51:26.000 –> 00:51:28.000
Yeah. So strong. I I think about that

00:51:28.000 –> 00:51:30.000
made me think about what I call comfort

00:51:30.000 –> 00:51:32.000
zone callus. Right? Your comfort zone is so

00:51:32.000 –> 00:51:34.000
small when we start out. Right? But then

00:51:34.000 –> 00:51:35.000
if you do something,

00:51:35.000 –> 00:51:37.000
it gets it just keeps getting a little

00:51:37.000 –> 00:51:39.000
bit bigger. Right? So then your hand, if

00:51:39.000 –> 00:51:40.000
it’s if you have a callus from, you

00:51:40.000 –> 00:51:41.000
know, work or whatever it may be, you

00:51:41.000 –> 00:51:43.000
just you gotta go around the callus, right,

00:51:43.000 –> 00:51:45.000
and figure out a way out to get

00:51:45.000 –> 00:51:47.000
out of your comfort zone. So well, Kevin,

00:51:47.000 –> 00:51:48.000
this has been awesome. And where do our

00:51:48.000 –> 00:51:51.000
listeners find more of, Kevin DeShazo?

00:51:52.000 –> 00:51:54.000
Yeah. So I’m on every social media platform,

00:51:54.000 –> 00:51:56.000
just at Kevin DeShazo,

00:51:56.000 –> 00:51:58.000
Twitter or X and and Instagram, probably the

00:51:58.000 –> 00:52:01.000
two that I’m most active on, LinkedIn fairly

00:52:01.000 –> 00:52:01.000
active as well.

00:52:02.000 –> 00:52:04.000
You’re welcome to just go to the website.

00:52:04.000 –> 00:52:05.000
DeShazo dot me.

00:52:06.000 –> 00:52:07.000
If you’re in sports,

00:52:07.000 –> 00:52:10.000
our sports leadership company is be better leaders

00:52:10.000 –> 00:52:12.000
dot com. So those are those are the

00:52:12.000 –> 00:52:13.000
easiest places to find me. It’s so great

00:52:13.000 –> 00:52:14.000
to have you on the circuit success, man.

00:52:14.000 –> 00:52:16.000
Appreciate your time. Absolutely. I honor to be

00:52:16.000 –> 00:52:17.000
with you.