Imperfect men helped Greg Hlavaty become a good guy.
“I think what saved me were men who stepped in as surrogate fathers,” Greg wrote in a recent essay. Those men weren’t exactly role models: One, Greg says, “was openly racist and bragged about having lobbed bricks from overpasses in his youth.” The other was “a middle-aged alcoholic…who regularly taught class drunk.” But both “really listened” to Greg, encouraged him, and were “genuinely proud” of his accomplishments. They connected with Great — and that, as they say, made all the difference.
Make Room for Less-Than-Perfect Men
Limiting boys’ contact with less-than-ideal role models might be harming our boys — and our men. In this conversation, Greg & Jen explore the surprising ways flawed, imperfect men can shape boys into compassionate, confident adults, as well as how we can encourage supportive connections between boys & men.
Takeaways:
- Surrogate father figures can have a profound impact on young men’s lives.
- Red flags in behavior should be assessed with context, not stigma.
- Accountability from mentors can guide young men towards better choices.
- Community involvement is essential in raising boys to be good men.
- Engaging in a child’s interests can strengthen bonds.
- Many men feel unqualified to mentor young people.
- Our culture often discourages intergenerational connections.
- Being present in a young person’s life can have a significant impact.
Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:
Stop Ignoring the Mental Health of Young Men — Greg’s essay
In Praise of Imperfect Men — Building Boys Bulletin post by Jen
What About Less-Than-Ideal Role Models? — Building Boys post by Jen
Sponsor Spotlight: Hello Fresh
Get 10 FREE meals at HelloFresh.com/FreeONBOYS
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy