Today, I share additional thoughts on the Victor/Victim topic as well as dive deeper into the homestead buying club concept.

Heads up! Self-Reliance Festival ticket prices go up tomorrow at midnight — if you’ve been on the fence, now’s the time: https://selfreliancefestival.com

Featured Event

Paul Wheaton has a pretty cool Kickstarter that’s in early bird mode through today. The project? A movie about how they developed the “Willow Feeder,” their hands-off human waste composting system at Wheaton Labs. They’ve spent years refining this setup, and now they’re ready to share it with the world.

If you toss in just $1 today, you get early supporter perks — including extra stuff they won’t offer later.

Link: https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/paulwheaton/willow-feeders?ref=9xygxe

Sponsors

Sponsor 1: AgoristTaxAdvice.com/LFTN

Sponsor 2: The Wealthsteading Podcast, InvestableWealth.com

Tales from the Prepper Pantry

Canning a bushel of green beans
Adding a Freezer so we can better organize frozen stores for the household
Busting with eggs and need to fix the freeze dryer

Frugality Tip

Meal planning keeps you from eating out and is healthier

Operation Independence

Moving the shed today so that we can put the glamper where the shed was and start renting that out. The shed will be turned into a camping cabin (with AC). Who wants to come to a workday to help us get the areas looking nice?

Main Topic of the Day: Homestead Buying Club and VictorhoodHomestead Buying Club and Empowering Homesteaders

First off, I listened to the interview with Tactical and so very much appreciated him sharing his story and I found it really impactful and also inspiring in continuing on my own healing journey and personal growth, hopefully with some new ideas.

Second, last week’s podcast about being a victor or victim was also helpful. It’s the midst of burnout season for a lot of farmers (especially production based).

It’s all got my wheels turning again about an idea I had exactly a year ago after talking with another market vendor friend and being sick of all the sundresses and floppy hats and picturesque unrealistic homestead Instagram crap. I don’t really know the exact vision but just craving a support group of people in similar situations. See the image I made below:

But at the same time, the stress of farming for men is insane too. I know because I see it in Adam. He needs a community of like minded people. He’s more isolated these days because he always feels behind on the farm.

We are in a crucial make or break time with our expansion so it’s been particularly stressful especially with cash flow management. I know it’ll all work out but it can be tough. Adam left his full time job.

I love the idea you had of a farm to table meal.

Also, I’ve had ideas before of a “homestead Home Depot” salvage (like super cheap consignment or free scraps) where people can look to get spare items others don’t need anymore to build things on their homestead. The bad thing is I know everybody likes to keep their own personal junk piles cause “they might need it” but used lumber and scrap metal, animal feeders, heat lamps, waterers, fencing etc can all help people get started or attain something on a budget.

A network of people in the community willing to help people farm sit so that if ever there was a chance to travel you could pay someone familiar with handling livestock etc.

Also, on a personal level for our business, if you get a pma in place, I’m *guessing* you could custom butcher a hog and still sell the individual cuts to holler hub members. There’s some gray area there that I don’t know about. If it was legal that way that would save people a good bit of money for super high quality pork. In any case, I’ve got 23 pigs ready in another month or two that I need to displace. We don’t have freezer space for all 23 so I’m hoping to get some customs sold too

These are all things that go on inside my brain and since you’d been discussing the holler hub, I thought I’d spill my ideas because I’m honestly overwhelmed with incubating and improving our current business model and not trying to start new ones at this time!

I would still like for us to get out and about and adventure to your place for the next gathering so we’ll bring your requested meats then unless you need otherwise.

VICTORHOODAfter listening to Episode 1060, I had some thoughts on the content. I’ll try not to be too

long winded but having lived a life full of adversity and still navigating the fall out from

some things, I have quite a bit of thoughts. While I don’t hope to magically cure anyone,

I do hope to plant some seeds for thought.

Towards the end of the episode there was a hypothetical posed. I just want to say, as

someone who has personally experienced abuse, I wanted to reiterate that any victim of

a crime is never responsible for what their abuser does. They are ONLY responsible for

their own healing. It’s not fair, but it is our responsibility in how we move forward.

As life is, we sometimes trust the wrong people, sometimes we are born to them,

sometimes we are the person in the wrong place at the wrong time. Your singular

responsibility, your role is not becoming a hurt person who hurts people. This is how we

break cycles. This is how we become better people despite our adverse experiences.

This is true when we get terminal diagnosis, we grew up in familial dysfunction, war,

flooding, natural disaster and plagues. We lose people through death and

abandonment. There are tons of adverse experiences we might not have placed

ourselves in, however, we have choices, sometimes all of them are shit. Other times

you must call yourself on your own shit.

But remember, even manure can grow flowers and mushrooms.

On Forgiveness, there are 4 steps.

Tell the story
Name the hurt
Grant Forgiveness
Renew or Release the Relationship

While that sounds much simpler than it is, these are the steps one must take. Once you

have granted forgiveness, you are not allowed to continue to punish someone for the

hurt they caused, that however, does not mean you stop talking about it. It means being

able to talk to the transgressor in a way that opens a door for continued forgiveness.

Telling the story doesn’t mean you stand on stage and out the person. It means you

speak directly to the person who caused the hurt. It means you reach out to trusted

allies for perspective and support. When we are emotionally escalated, our thoughts

can get carried away. Practice pausing when your emotions are heightened.

Nothing big will ever be able to be solved overnight. That means you do not have to

have an answer today, tonight or even tomorrow. It only means you have a willingness

to come together on the subject.

Forgiveness is a practice. This means that sometimes you will have to choose to forgive

over and over again. Every time that hurt or betrayal surfaces, you will have a decision

to make. This makes repair work exceptionally important.

If you are willing to forgive and the other person does not want to do repair work, you

are entering a cycle of continued harm. Please know when to walk away.

Sometimes the person you have to forgive is yourself. This is imperative for any repair

and healing work.

And finally steps to changing negative thought cycles:

Pause and Notice -What am I thinking right now?
Become aware of the loop, what is the thought or repeating pattern.

Name the Pattern- What kind of thought is this?
Am I catastrophizing, black and white thinking, mind reading (assuming I

know what someone is thinking or judging me) or criticism?

Feel and Validate- What feeling is driving this thought?
Most negative thoughts are a reflection of an unmet need
Acknowledge and name it with kindness instead of judgment or

suppression

Reframe the thought- What is a kinder, truer, and more empowering

thought?

Don’t sugarcoat just shift towards something more balanced and

compassionate. Ex: I’ve made mistakes, but I am learning, and mistakes

do not define my character or value system. That was a good learning

moment for me because I can be more aware of that moving forward.

Look for evidence to prove yourself wrong. Think of this, if I am feeling

unlovable, perhaps it’s helpful to think of moments or people who make

me feel genuinely cared for and loved. If I think I always have bad luck, try

to remember a time when something worked out for me. Proving negative

thoughts wrong can help disrupt the negative thoughts train.

Shift and Choose- What supportive action can I take now?
Do something that helps you reset. This can be journaling, breath work or

moving your body. Do something that is for yourself, just YOU. Pouring

yourself into something (like work) instead can be emotional bypassing.

You want to be in your body and body aware, not avoiding it.

Anyway, I hope all of this is helpful. I hope it gives some actionable steps to those who

aren’t certain where to start. And I hope this makes you all feel more free. Freedom is

often found in the work we are avoiding.

I want to add that you are worth your own 20 minutes for journaling, for a cup of quite

coffee, for moving your body in a way that feels good to you. You have not received all

the goodness you’ll ever have in your life YET. But all of that begins and ends with you.

Make it a great week.

GUYS! Don’t forget about the cookbook, Cook With What You Have by Nicole Sauce and Mama Sauce.

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