Why Church Culture Makes Infidelity Easier: Power, Hiding, and the Failure of Discipleship

What happens when church culture rewards appearance over transformation and silence over honesty? In this brutally honest and deeply reflective episode, Mike Erre and Andy Bear tackle a listener’s request to unpack the issue of infidelity among church leaders and why it may be more common—or at least more hidden—than we’d like to admit.

Reflecting on personal experience, witness to spiritual leaders who have fallen publicly, and a dysfunctional worship team dress code, the conversation explores how Western models of church and pastoring create systems where personal brokenness is ignored rather than exposed and healed. Mike shares vulnerably from his own struggles to reveal how unchecked ego needs and church culture’s preference for polish can lead to spiritual rot.

This episode is a crucial call to shift from sin management to discipleship, from platform addiction to communal honesty, and from isolation to transformation. If you’re a church leader, serve on a ministry team, or care about the health of your faith community, this one’s for you.

Key Takeaways: • Why Sin Management Fails – How transactional gospels ignore the need for genuine transformation and contribute to shallow spiritual formation. • The Toxicity of the Stage – How church platforms and social media reward image over honesty, and how that dynamic gives temptation room to grow. • Creating a Culture of Confession – The difference between shocking vulnerability and life-giving transparency that fosters healing and spiritual maturity. • Why Messes Aren't Welcome – How church systems discourage emotional honesty, forcing leaders to hide behind performance and piety. • Personal Stories of Struggle – Mike reflects on therapy, ego needs, temptation, and how he's learning to walk in fullness rather than validation-hunting.

Resources Mentioned: • Close Calls by Dave Carder – A powerful look at the warning signs of emotional and physical affairs and how to navigate temptation before damage is done. • Dallas Willard – His concept of the “gospel of sin management” as a critique of modern Christian discipleship. • Vox Community Podcast – A four-part deep dive series on God’s judgment and wrath, referenced throughout this episode.

Share your own thoughts, stories, or questions by emailing us at hello@voxpodcast.com or engaging on Facebook and Instagram.

Subscribe, leave a review, and help us build a church culture that welcomes messiness, promotes honesty, and seeks true transformation in Jesus.

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As always, we encourage and would love discussion as we pursue. Feel free to email in questions to hello@voxpodcast.com, and to engage the conversation on Facebook and Instagram.

We're on YouTube (if you're into that kinda thing): VOXOLOGY TV.

Our Merch Store! ETSY

Learn more about the Voxology Podcast

Subscribe on iTunes or Spotify

Support the Voxology Podcast on Patreon

The Voxology Spotify channel can be found here: Voxology Radio

Follow us on Instagram: @voxologypodcast and "like" us on Facebook

Follow Mike on Twitter: www.twitter.com/mikeerre

Music in this episode by Timothy John Stafford

Instagram & Twitter: @GoneTimothy