Parenting & You With Dr. Shefali The Parenting Trap: When Love Turns Into Control
Aug 19, 2025
Discover the delicate balance between love and control in parenting. Explore emotional enmeshment and the pitfalls of codependency that parents often face. Dive into personal stories about navigating body modifications and the importance of trust with children. Learn how self-awareness helps parents avoid projecting their own struggles onto their kids. Embrace the emotional journey of childhood, recognizing that children's feelings are valid and not a reflection of your parenting. Create a compassionate space for open emotional expression.
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Parental Enmeshment Is Natural
- Parenting naturally creates enmeshment and codependency because children share our DNA and we care for them from infancy.
- Recognizing this tendency helps parents step back and allow children to have their own life experiences.
Secret Nose Piercing Led To Deep Talk
- Veronique described how her 13-year-old secretly got a nose piercing after she delayed giving an answer.
- They processed it together with crying and conversation and ultimately agreed on conditions to keep trust.
Say ‘I Need Time’ And Set Boundaries
- Tell your child you need time if you don't know the answer and set a temporary boundary about permanent body changes.
- Communicate clearly so they know not to act before you decide.