The Deep-Rooted Marriage: Cultivating Intimacy, Healing, and Delight

Apr 9, 2025

Dr. Steve Call, a clinical psychologist and co-author of 'The Deep Rooted Marriage,' dives into how past traumas shape current marital conflicts. He shares his personal journey and highlights the importance of awareness and curiosity in relationships. The discussion includes practical strategies for fostering emotional intimacy, the healing power of play, and effective methods for managing relationship triggers. With insights on nurturing connections and enhancing communication, Dr. Call offers hope and tools for couples seeking deeper understanding and healing.

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ANECDOTE

Past Trauma Triggered by Small Moments

Dr. Steve Call shares a story about a small interaction with his wife triggering past trauma related to performance pressure.
This illustrates how everyday moments in marriage can activate unresolved emotions from one's past.

ADVICE

Practice Intentional Curiosity

Cultivate intentional curiosity about your own and your partner's emotional reactions during conflicts.
Ask gently, "What happened for you?" to foster understanding instead of blame.

INSIGHT

Awareness: Foundation of Healing

Awareness is the foundational key to understanding conflicts influenced by past trauma.
Often we mistakenly blame our spouse for emotional responses tied to unresolved personal history.

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In this episode, I am thrilled to welcome Dr. Steve Call, a clinical psychologist and co-author with Dr. Dan Allender of The Deep Rooted Marriage: Cultivating Intimacy, Healing, and Delight*. We dive into the book's themes, focusing on how past traumas influence present marital conflicts and how to grow in emotional understanding and intimacy. Dr. Call shares his personal marriage journey, emphasizing the importance of awareness and curiosity in relationships.

We discuss practical steps for couples to cultivate awareness, the role of play in healing, and strategies for managing triggers. Dr. Call offers hope and resources for couples to nourish their relationships.

To learn more about Dr. Call’s resources and to get the book, visit TheReconnectInstitute.com.

Topics Covered in this Episode:

Discussion of the book "The Deep Rooted Marriage: Cultivating Intimacy, Healing, and Delight.*"
Exploration of how past experiences and traumas influence current marital conflicts.
Importance of cultivating awareness and curiosity in relationships.
The role of intensive counseling formats in addressing deep-rooted issues.
Strategies for couples to develop awareness during conflicts.
The significance of play in fostering connection and healing in marriage.
Addressing triggers and shame in relationships, particularly during recovery.
Practical strategies for emotional regulation and self-care during challenging moments.
The metaphor of soil amendments to illustrate the need for nurturing relationships.
Resources and support for couples seeking to deepen their connection and navigate challenges.

More Resources:

The Deep-Rooted Marriage* by Allender and Call
Marriage Story Intensive
Reconnect* by Dr. Steve Call

Related Podcasts:

*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn referral fees on purchases through this link.

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