How to Stop Hiding After Trauma (Starting Today)

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If you have been through betrayal or loss, you may still be living by a terrible rule you made when in pain.

It can look like hiding, overworking, numbing out, or letting people cross lines because being unseen feels safer. This episode uses the fairy tale “All-Kinds-of-Fur” to help you identify your survival pattern and take the next step out of it. When you update the rule you made when in trauma, you get your choices back.

What you’ll learn

• Identify the “impossible promise” that keeps you stuck, and where it began.
• Notice your “fur cloak,” the mask of busyness, perfectionism, people pleasing, or disappearing.
• Stop confusing coping with identity, and start practicing safer honesty.
• Practice the “30-minute return,” small windows to feel, speak, and be seen.
• Build endurance through gentle reveal-retreat-return, until you can stay safely present.

Joseph Lee and Deborah Stewart, Jungian analysts, turn this tale into a guide to show how your inner world can heal after trauma.

In the tale, the princess survives by covering herself in fur and soot, and you may have built a costume too. That costume once protected you; now it may block love, work opportunities, and genuine intimacy. You might scroll at night, over function in relationships, or stay “fine” so nobody asks.

Healing is repeated practice; you show up, you pull back, you show up again. The “gold” in the story is what stays intact in you, even after the worst day.

This week, choose one safe moment to let that gold show, one honest sentence, one boundary, one small ask, then note the result.

Read along with the dream ⁠HERE⁠.

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