S02E04 The What Does It Mean To Be Humble Episode

Oct 24, 2022

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Check-In Question:

What personal quality do you know people appreciate about you?

Big Ideas:

3 attitudes - Unconditional Responsibility, Essential Integrity, Ontological Humility
Ontology - Philosophy related to being, relationships one has to being
Dividing responsibility starting from 100% doesn't work, each person has 100% responsibility for themselves
Keeping your word is not the same as honoring your word
Keeping your word with others sometimes means NOT keeping your word with yourself
Integrity is different for every person because everyone's values are different
Humility being pushed, but is it really what people need or expect
It's all about our mindset - we can see things as a challenge or an opportunity
You can choose
When am I saying it was external circumstances, versus my responsibilities
When feeling overwhelmed, easier to point to external circumstances because feels more overwhelming
Player and victim - the player takes responsibility, the victim doesn't
Take responsibility for not knowing
Circle of concern and circle of influence - when we focus on our circle of concern, we diminish our ability to influence
We don't have a lot of influence on the "IT", but we do have responsibility for the "I"
The answer is not to worry about what we can't control
Trust is important before creating change and influencing others
Coaching and psychotherapy are about helping people take responsibility
Society that is very outcome based ("It" based)
Most effective when we operate from our basic human values
People can share values, even those values show up differently
What's the difference between a value and a belief?
Values versus virtues?
Operationalizing values - from Brené Brown
Values are a noun and define something abstract,
Virtues are like a character trait
Relativeness of point of view - can we know the truth?
Employees need to feel safe to make mistakes, so as leaders we need to model it
Proving our way to success hooks our ego
Ego gets hooked when focused on external validation
How we were conditioned to believe we were worthy influences our ego
Tallest poppy syndrome
What's so difficult about being humble?
Opinions being the end of democracy - how can you construct something without values?
What's bigger than values?

Resources:

Conscious Business by Fred Kofman
The Big Leap - Gay Hendricks
Man's Search for Meaning - Viktor Frankl
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey
The 4 Hour Work Week by Tim Ferriss