Former Bishop, Recovering Addict | An Interview with Evan Hathaway

Evan Hathaway owns the Time To Smile Dental practice in Eagle, Idaho, just outside of Boise, specializing in cosmetic and sedation dentistry. He particularly loves serving those needing reconstruction from fear-based dental neglect. Evan grew up in southeastern Idaho and attended Rick’s College and Brigham Young University. He earned his doctorate degree in Dental Surgery at Virginia Commonwealth University in Richmond, Virginia, and a general practice residency in Northern California prior to settling in the Boise area. Evan served a mission to Leeds, England, and has served in an elders quorum presidency, a bishopric, as a Young Men president, high counselor, YSA bishop, and high priest group leader. He is currently serving as the elders quorum instructor and as a senior service missionary for the Addiction Recovery Program. Evan loves art and creating, reading and learning with his wife of 39 years, Missy, and enjoys weight lifting to stay fit, but his greatest passion is his family and serving and ministering to those recovering from addictions. Evan and Missy have four children and 13 grandchildren. Highlights 02:00 Evan introduces himself and his story. 06:00 Evan’s mindset was, it’s up to me and all I have to do is work hard to overcome this. He wasn’t surrendering to God. 07:20 Addiction started for Evan when he got addicted to painkillers after shoulder surgery. He had a lot of other addictions in his life that he wasn’t even aware of. 09:30 Evan talks about his early addiction to pornography and other things he did to cope. Extreme exercise was one of the ways of trying to stay away from pornography. 12:30 Evan goes more into his addiction of painkillers and his state of denial. 14:00 Overcoming addiction is not about having more willpower. It’s about humility and getting help from God. 15:40 Evan describes the nuclear bomb that went off in his life. He got caught in his addiction, went to a 90-day rehab, almost got his license taken away, and was faced with possible jail time. 20:45 Going to the rehab center and overcoming shame and fear 24:10 “I had to be force-fed vulnerability.” Evan was forced to be humble and truly learn to be honest and vulnerable. 25:45 Evan’s advice to leaders when it comes to letting people share their stories Don’t add to shame culture because you feel uncomfortable talking about certain topics Shame culture shackles healing 31:15 What can leaders do to help with addictions? As leaders we need to be the catalyst of de-shaming. 34:00 Evan illustrates the difference between having a perfectionist attitude and hiding your sins vs being honest, open, and vulnerable. 36:00 As a Bishop are you sending a shame message or a redemption message? 36:15 In today’s world we can’t teach obedience more than we teach redemption and healing. 37:00 Invite someone like Evan to your fifth Sunday to share their story of redemption. 39:00 Let’s stop categorizing sin. All sin keeps us from God. 42:00 Telling stories. We can connect to stories and we can feel the Spirit through honest stories. 44:20 Create a space where it’s ok to admit to the things we’ve done wrong. 47:00 Evan talks about the things that his wife has had to do in order to support Evan and take care of her own mental health. She went through a program called Al-Anon. 48:40 Evan is dedicated to going to 12-step meetings for the rest of his life. This helps him not relapse and keeps him engaged. 52:00 Step twelve is to share the message. Keep helping others. 52:40 What Evan’s recovery looks like today and where he’s at in his dentistry career. 54:30 Recovery as a family. Reconnecting with his wife through recovery and regaining emotional intimacy. 1:01:10 Evan’s wife’s journey to healing and dealing with betrayal trauma. 1:04:45 Evan’s final thoughts to church leaders trying to help people with addiction Links Al-Anon