Building Passive Wealth with Private Money Lending: Insights from Jay Conner

***Guest Appearance

Credits to:

https://www.youtube.com/@keithborie 

"Episode#83: A Quick and Easy Way To Fund Your Real Estate Deals - Jay Conner"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rdGt4Y2U4zg 

Suppose you’ve ever wondered how seasoned real estate investors secure funding and scale their businesses, even when banks turn their backs. In that case, Jay Conner’s story is a masterclass in resourcefulness and strategic networking. Appearing on Keith Borie’s “The Wealth Flow” podcast, Jay Conner shared how losing his traditional lines of credit transformed his career and unlocked a world of private money lending that anyone, even beginners, can tap into with the right approach.

From Banks to Private Lenders: A Pivotal Shift

Jay Conner’s journey in real estate began like many others: relying on institutional money and local banks to finance deals. For six years, this strategy served him well until 2009, when his line of credit was abruptly cut off during the global financial crisis. Instead of calling it quits, Jay asked himself a simple but powerful question: “Who do I know who can help me with my problem?”

A quick call to a friend and fellow investor, Jeff Blankenship, introduced Jay to the concept of “private money”—capital lent by individuals outside the traditional banking system, often using investment funds or retirement accounts. For Jay, this was the game-changer. Within ninety days, he raised over $2.1 million in private money, laying the foundation for hundreds of future deals.

Teaching, Not Asking: The Secret Sauce

One key lesson Jay emphasizes is the importance of having the right mindset. Most new investors fear rejection when asking for money. Jay flips the script: he never “asks” for money—instead, he “offers” an opportunity. He approaches potential lenders as a teacher: educating them about how private lending works, what rates they can earn, and how their investment will be protected with promissory notes and first-position mortgages.

By separating the “teaching conversation” from the “deal conversation,” Jay removes the desperation (which, as he puts it, “has a smell to it”) and builds genuine relationships. When he has a deal ready, he calls existing interested lenders with what he calls the “good news phone call”—simply presenting the details and timeline, no begging or selling involved.

Why Private Lenders Jump In

Jay describes his network of 47 private lenders, none of whom had ever heard of private lending before meeting him. For many, the appeal is simple: higher, more consistent returns than stocks or CDs, backed by real estate collateral, with zero day-to-day management hassles. Whether it’s putting idle cash to work or leveraging retirement funds through self-directed IRAs, private lending offers passive income and strong security.

To make investing even easier, Jay handles everything: matching funds with deals, ensuring proper legal documentation, securing insurance, and, crucially, maintaining flexibility with terms. Lenders have options for monthly, quarterly, or semiannual payouts, and built-in clauses allow for early exits or substitutions if life circumstances change.

A Win-Win Mindset

What sets Jay apart is his win-win mentality. He firmly believes in putting the lender’s needs first, educating rather than selling, and building relationships that last for years. Most of his lenders have stayed with him since 2009—a testament to his integrity and the effectiveness of his system.

He also recommends that every serious investor establish a relationship with a reputable self-directed IRA company, such as Quest Trust, to unlock the vast pool of retirement funds waiting for better returns.

Getting Started: Jay’s Advice

For investors eager to