LessWrong (30+ Karma) Not A Love Letter, But A Thank You Letter
Nov 29, 2025
A heartfelt exploration unfolds as the narrator reflects on gratitude towards Gretta Duleba, sparked by a poignant blog post. He shares the deep trust he feels in her, highlighting her sanity and reliability. Vulnerability emerges as he reveals his usual emotional walls and the desire for teammates in life. Through anecdotes of romantic teamwork and past conflicts, he illustrates how Gretta and her partner pass his 'team test.' Small moments of shared joy and collaboration release him from the weight of solitude.
AI Snips
Chapters
Transcript
Episode notes
Gratitude, Not Traditional Love
- The speaker's dominant feeling when reflecting is deep gratitude rather than romantic love or limerence.
- That gratitude frames his emotional response and grounds the rest of the message.
Scar Tissue From Failed Teaming
- The speaker admits to emitting contempt or condescension by default and finds it undesirable.
- He longs for teammates he can trust after repeated disappointments over 30+ years.
Wingmanning And Poly Instincts
- He describes trying to wingman for previous partners and having poly instincts to treat partners as teammates.
- His ten-year relationship failed to accept that approach, creating emotional pain and mismatch.