Etiquette expert Lizzie Post discusses the roles and responsibilities of wedding attendants, including historical traditions and modern trends. They cover financial aspects, gift-giving etiquette, managing overwhelmed brides/grooms, and delivering heartfelt speeches. The podcast emphasizes clear communication, personal connections, and setting boundaries in fulfilling wedding party roles.
Being a wedding attendant signifies a deep bond with the couple and modern weddings often involve co-ed teams standing on both sides.
Etiquette expert emphasizes clear communication and realistic financial expectations within wedding parties for attire, travel, and gifts.
Attendants play a crucial role in providing support, problem-solving, and ensuring a smooth ceremony and reception on the wedding day.
Deep dives
Evolution of Wedding Party Roles
The role of wedding attendants has evolved over time, from ancient Roman traditions of having a large wedding party to more symbolic roles today. Being part of a wedding party signifies a deep bond with the couple and is no longer restricted by gender. Modern weddings often involve co-ed teams standing on both sides, emphasizing the lasting friendships.
Responsibilities of Wedding Attendants
Being a wedding attendant entails various responsibilities, including assisting with attire selections, offering support to the couple, coordinating pre-wedding events like showers or bachelor parties, and actively participating in wedding ceremonies and receptions. There's a focus on coordinating logistics, offering emotional support, and ensuring the smooth running of wedding events.
Etiquette and Budgeting for Wedding Parties
Etiquette expert Lizzie Post emphasizes the importance of clear communication and realistic expectations within wedding parties. Couples should carefully consider the financial implications for attendants, such as clothing, travel, and accommodation expenses. It's crucial to prioritize consideration and honesty when discussing roles and financial commitments with wedding party members.
Speeches and Gift Giving in Wedding Parties
While traditionally only the best man is expected to give a speech, many weddings allow for additional speeches from other members of the wedding party. Attendants are encouraged to focus on supportive and sentimental speeches that highlight the couple's love and commitment. When it comes to gifting, attendants are expected to contribute to group gifts or provide individual gifts based on their closeness to the couple.
Support and Problem-Solving on the Wedding Day
On the wedding day, attendants play a crucial role in providing support, problem-solving, and ensuring a smooth ceremony and reception. This includes addressing last-minute issues, assisting the couple with any needs, and actively participating in various aspects of the wedding. Attendants are encouraged to be good listeners, calm nerves, and adapt to unexpected situations to make the day memorable for the couple.
So your friends are getting married, and they’ve asked you to stand up at their wedding. . . in some ways, this can be a rite of passage for many grown-ups. It can feel like an honor. But it can also be a lot to take on, too. What are the actual expectations of a wedding attendant (i.e. bridesmaid, groomsman, MOH, or best man)?
Lizzie Post from the Emily Post Institute returns to the podcast to teach Molly and Matt about the roles and responsibilities of a wedding party: Who’s included, what to budget for, and which events you actually need to attend.
Do you have grown-up stuff that you want to figure out and learn more about? Send us an email or voice memo with your ideas and questions to grownupstuffpod@gmail.com You may hear your question on an upcoming episode!