Gyno Girl Presents: Sex, Drugs & Hormones Why Women Still Fake Orgasms: Closing the Bedroom Gap with Dr. Maria Sophocles
Why are so many women still faking orgasms—and blaming themselves for sex that doesn’t feel good?
I can't even begin to tell you how many women come into my office thinking they’re broken—because sex isn’t working for them the way it “should.” They’re doing all the right things, checking all the boxes, and still feeling disconnected, dry, resentful, or just straight-up bored in the bedroom. But here's the thing: it's not their fault, and they’re definitely not alone.
In this episode, I’m talking with Maria, a total powerhouse in sexual medicine and menopause care. We go deep into the systemic blind spots in medical training, the cultural shame around female pleasure, and how most of us were never even taught how to understand our own bodies. From the bedroom gap to vibrator prescriptions, we’re covering it all—honestly, unfiltered, and with the kind of compassion that’s long overdue.
Maria shares how her own clinical journey shifted when she realized how many women were being misdiagnosed or dismissed—especially when it came to menopause and sexual health. She’s on a mission to close the gendered healthcare gap, and she’s not waiting around for the system to catch up. We also dig into the everyday stuff: how screens are killing sex, why novelty matters, and how to actually start advocating for the sex life you want.
This is one of those conversations that’ll make you laugh, nod, and maybe even rethink your nightstand drawer. And yes, we talk about lubes, vibrators, and why your bedroom deserves better vibes (and better lighting).
Highlights:
- The origin of The Bedroom Gap and how it's damaging women's relationships
- Why Maria believes medical education is failing women—especially in menopause
- The orgasm gap, mercy sex, and how women are taught to prioritize male pleasure
- The cultural baggage that still surrounds self-pleasure and masturbation
- How to reframe your relationship with lube, sex toys, and your own body
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Dr. Maria Sophocles bio:
Maria has been a practicing gynecologist for 29 years and is an internationally respected expert in menopause and female sexual function.
She is the founder of Women's Healthcare of Princeton, a progressive gynecology practice serving over 30,000 women in the U.S. To meet the needs of international and remote U.S. patients, in 2024 she launched The Thinking Woman, a virtual consultation practice.
She completed a BA in English with honors and distinction from Duke University, attended medical School at Jefferson Medical College and completed her residency at Johns Hopkins Hospital’s Greater Baltimore Medical Center.
She is board certified in ob/gyn, a certified menopause practitioner, and has been named a fellow to national societies (ISSVD and ISSWSH) for her contributions to gynecology.
As one of the first U.S. clinicians to recognize the need for a non-estrogen option to treat vaginal atrophy, in 2015 she pioneered the use of Co2 Laser in the U.S.; she has taught clinicians this technology on five continents.
A passionate advocate for reproductive freedom and contraceptive access, she fought for seven years alongside Senator Shirley Turner to achieve passage of New Jersey Bill S275, a part of the historic Freedom of Reproductive Choice Act which became law in 2023.
Appalled by the pervasiveness of the gendered healthcare gap, she is developing a Women’s Health clinic in rural Kenya.
Her TED talk “What Happens to Sex in Midlife” has garnered nearly a million views and her forthcoming book, The Bedroom Gap will be released in late 2025.
She is currently at work on a documentary about Sex, Menopause and Gender Equality called HOT!. She is married with four children.
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