David Brooks, New York Times columnist and author of 'How to Know a Person', discusses the importance of small interactions in making others feel valued. He explores human behavior, connection, effective communication across differences, and the transformative power of truly understanding and appreciating others.
Small interactions can shape lives significantly by making others feel valued and understood.
Understanding unconscious processes and human intuitions is crucial in decision-making and behavioral science research.
Deep dives
David Brooks' Latest Book and the Importance of Knowing Others
David Brooks' latest book, How to Know a Person, delves into our ability to understand and value others deeply. It explores the significance of knowing others and making them feel valued and understood. The book discusses the difference between illuminators who enhance connection and stereotypes who ignore complexities, offering practical advice on building meaningful relationships. Brooks highlights how seemingly small interactions can shape lives significantly.
The Depth of Human Nature Explored Through Behavioral Science
Brooks discusses the profound insights gained from behavioral science research, emphasizing the importance of understanding unconscious processes and human intuitions. He acknowledges the limitations of reason and delves into the power of sentiments and emotions in decision-making. By studying the depths of human nature, behavioral science sheds light on how decisions are made, revealing the complexities of our inner workings.
Skills for Being a Decent Person and Enhancing Connections
Brooks emphasizes the importance of concrete skills in being a decent person, likening social abilities to learnable skills such as tennis or carpentry. He highlights the significance of asking for forgiveness, hosting inclusive gatherings, and navigating difficult conversations with empathy. Being an illuminator involves traits like active listening, avoiding one-upmanship, and mastering the art of meaningful conversations.
Navigating Mental Health Struggles and Supporting Others
In a poignant reflection on mental health struggles and supporting loved ones, Brooks shares insights from personal experiences, especially in dealing with a friend's suicide. He acknowledges the challenges of understanding and supporting individuals facing depression and emphasizes the importance of acknowledging their reality, offering goodwill, and providing consistent emotional support. Brooks underscores the impact of genuine presence and the power of walking with others through difficult times with grace and compassion.
New York Times columnist David Brooks’ latest book, How to Know a Person is about our ability to know others, and to make them feel valued and understood. In this episode, Brooks talks to Chicago Booth’s Nick Epley about how seemingly small, everyday interactions can significantly shape our lives. Their conversation was part of the Think Better series, organized by Chicago Booth’s Roman Family Center for Decision Research.
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