What it Means to Be a Man of Your Word with Ryan King

(To my gay and queer brothers: I do my best to make these emails as inclusive as possible. Every so often I’ll be focusing a message on the male/female relationship dynamic, since that’s my personal area of lived experience and expertise. Just want you to know I see you.)

Guys, there’s only one question that matters to your woman.

Can she count on you?

“Can she count on you” is a question you can’t answer with words…

…you can only answer it through consistent action. “Can she count on you” is a question you can’t answer one time…

…it must be answered over and over again.

With every action (or non-action) you are reinforcing one of two things:

She can count on you
She can’t

It’s that simple. And it’s amazing how few men understand this.

7 Questions She Wants to Know the Answer To

Read these slowly…and be ruthlessly honest in your self-assessment.

Can she count on you to:

…live up to your word?
…admit when you’re wrong?
…be there for her emotionally?
…follow through on your commitments?
…show up for both the big and small things?
…stand up for yourself when she’s pushing too far?
…show up when it’s hard…when it’s inconvenient…when you’re exhausted?

A Challenge: If you have the courage and the desire, bring these 7 questions to the lady in your life, and ask her to answer them with full candor. If you take this on, it is your responsibility to own whatever emotional response comes up for you if you hear something you don’t like. In that case, thank her for the gift she just gave you. Your work is to go process that, learn from it and show up better…in a way she can count on.

-DQ

PS: Share this with a man in your life who’s asking the important questions about his life.