Lewis Huckstep: "Love & Relationships, Why They Breakdown And What They're Here To Teach You..."

In this episode of In Your Skin, we sit down with performance coach and creator Lewis Huckstep to unpack conscious relationships, triggers, and why your values and vision matter more than ever. Lewis shares his neurodivergent backstory (ADHD and Asperger’s), childhood dysregulation, and how early trauma shaped his patterns in intimacy, before becoming the very toolkit he now uses to help others heal. We also open with a vulnerable share from Christie about consciously uncoupling and navigating a relationship that’s evolved into friendship and co-parenting.

Lewis breaks down the five bodies of healing (mental, emotional, physical/somatic, spiritual, energetic), the difference between beliefs and perceptions, and how to spot your “core wound” so you stop repeating the same dynamics. From setting non-negotiables and doing quarterly relationship resets, to the line between triggers and boundaries, this chat is a practical roadmap for anyone feeling stuck, whether you’re staying, leaving, or dating again.

If you’ve ever felt lost in love or purpose, this conversation will help you get clear on who you are, what you value, and how to build relationships that actually fit the life you’re creating.

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Episode Breakdown:

1:02 – Meet Lewis Huckstep + why ADHD/Asperger’s became his coaching superpower

3:25 – Avoiding intimacy after childhood conflict; “past hurt creates future fear”

5:55 – Frameworks, structure & step-by-step healing work

7:01 – What to tell your younger self: values, regulation, and finding your gifts

10:36 – Trauma as a gift (once healed) & the five bodies of healing

12:28 – Perceptions vs beliefs; why relationships mirror your wounds

18:11 – “Are you ever fully healed?” Conditioning, patterns, triggers

23:59 – Absence, control, freedom & presence: flipping core narratives

27:14 – Partners and kids as mirrors; shadow work made simple

30:06 – Why we attract the “same partner” in different clothes

33:29 – Christie shares: ending a 16-year relationship with care & clarity

39:50 – Can differences coexist? Triggers vs boundaries in practice

43:12 – Dating again: when you’re ready & what to ask for

46:04 – Healing before the next love; clarity beats chemistry

49:05 – Purpose 101: “You become who you needed when you were at your lowest”

58:59 – Bringing it home: voice, self-belief, connection & appreciation

Connect with us on Instagram @inyourskin.podcast

Connect with Christie Whitehill on Instagram @christiewhitehill

Connect with Anna Robards on Instagram @annaheinrich1

The content in this In Your Skin podcast is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. If listeners use the information, it is at their own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for medical advice, or any other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Every person is unique, and listeners should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such condition.

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