369. Crushed by The Guilty Feminist with Margaret Cabourn-Smith and special guest Sindhu Vee
Sep 4, 2023
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Sindhu Vee, a special guest, joins Margaret Cabourn-Smith on this episode. They discuss desires for a certain physical image, feminism and crushes, road trip drama, unrequited love, guilty and feminist crushes, and upcoming events like the Crushed show and London Podcast Festival.
The speaker's crushes often ended in embarrassing or disappointing outcomes despite her efforts to impress them.
A relationship should not define one's entire identity, and it is essential to prioritize personal growth and individuality.
Movies and societal expectations contribute to reinforcing gender stereotypes and the pressure to conform to cultural norms like marriage, highlighting the need to challenge and embrace individuality.
Deep dives
Crush #1: The Unrequited Crush from University
In university, the speaker had a crush on a guy who was friends with her parents. She finally mustered up the courage to tell him, but he walked out without saying a word. Two years later, they reconnected during a road trip, but the speaker accidentally exposed herself in an embarrassing situation. The crush ended that day.
Crush #2: The Professor with the Leather Jacket
During the speaker's university days, she had a crush on her professor. She would sit in front of class, smoke cigarettes, and made efforts to impress him. However, the crush ended abruptly when she fell and her skirt covered her head, revealing uncomfortable red long johns.
Impressions Gone Wrong
The speaker shared her experience of going to great lengths to impress her crushes, only to have embarrassing or disappointing outcomes. Whether it was leaving notes, giving flowers, or attempting to dress to impress, her efforts did not always yield the desired results.
The Intensity of First Love
The speaker describes the intensity and obsessiveness of her first love. She counted down the hours and minutes until they would see each other and saw her entire identity as being his girlfriend. However, the relationship eventually ended due to the speaker's overwhelming intensity and focus on marriage.
The Power of Identity Beyond Relationships
The podcast explores the speaker's experience of realizing that a relationship should not define one's entire identity. Through a personal story of a breakup, the speaker emphasizes the importance of not identifying oneself solely through a romantic partnership. This revelation led to personal growth and a shift in perspective.
The Influence of Movies and Cultural Norms
The podcast discusses how movies contribute to societal expectations and reinforce gender stereotypes. It highlights the disparity in how romantic gestures are perceived based on the gender of the person performing them. The speaker also reflects on the pressure to conform to cultural norms, including the cultural imperative to get married, and discusses the need to challenge these norms and embrace individuality.