The Statue of Zeus at Olympia: Sweaty, Oily, and Judging You
Apr 11, 2024
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Discover the ancient wonder of the Statue of Zeus at Olympia, towering like a three-storey building, with its glistening skin of ivory and daily oiling. Uncover curses, secret engravings, daytime sex, and athletic men. Learn about the Olympics, the grandeur of the temple, and the tragic fate of this colossal statue. Explore its influence on modern representations, like the Lincoln Memorial, and join a slightly unhinged deep dive into the Hellenic imagination.
The Statue of Zeus at Olympia was an enormous, formidable statue made of hippopotamus ivory that required daily oiling to prevent cracking.
Athletes at the Olympics would curse and hex their competition, exercise naked, and participate in singing contests, philosophy face-offs, and poetry slams.
The Olympic Village was a hub of male virility, showcasing physical prowess and eroticized ambition through exercises, love-making, and competitions.
Women were strictly prohibited from spectating at the Olympic Games, except for the priestess of Demeter and female sex workers, challenging male-dominated narratives.
Deep dives
Preparations and Rituals at Olympia
Before the Olympic Games, athletes would arrive, get purified and anointed with oil, exercise naked in the gymnasium, taking time to curse and hex their competition, a practice considered normal. The site was charged with male virility, showcasing muscle and agility. Law sanctioned cursing but condemned cheating. Participants went through rigorous rituals and ceremonies, including being anointed with oil and exercising naked to demonstrate their prowess.
Festivities and Entertainment at the Olympics
Amidst athletic events, the Olympics featured singing contests, philosophy face-offs, and poetry slams for entertainment. These diversions provided a break from the intense physical feats and allowed for additional participation beyond physical competition. The games were a display of male virility and prowess, with an atmosphere of eroticized ambition promoting achievements and dominance, inspired by the god Eros.
Orgies and Lifestyle at the Olympic Village
The Olympic Village was a bustling space where male athletes exercised, competed, and engaged in sexual activities. Couples would watch each other and men would exercise in the nude, highlighting physical appearances and talent. The site was characterized by eroticized ambition and male love, setting the scene for exercises, love-making, and competitions that demonstrated prowess and masculine dominance.
Women's Participation Restrictions and Unique Incidents
Women were prohibited from spectating at the Olympic Games, with strict penalties for those who dared to watch. Only one woman, the priestess of Demeter, was allowed, while female sex workers were present. A unique incident occurred when one woman, overcome with joy as her son won in the boxing contest, crossed barriers, lost her clothes, and became a spontaneous part of the spectacle.
Ancient Roman Wardrobe Malfunctions and Women's Role at the Olympic Games
In ancient Rome, incidents of wardrobe malfunctions due to brooches and pins were common among large gatherings. Women faced restrictions at the Olympic Games where they were mostly absent unless serving as sex workers or priestesses. The Herrayan Games, exclusively for women, took place in honor of Hera with mythological ties, challenging the male-dominated narratives of the time.
Phidias and the Magnificent Statue of Zeus at Olympia
Phidias, tasked with sculpting the elaborate statue of Zeus at Olympia, faced challenges before creating a colossal masterpiece. The statue, seated on a throne, stood approximately 40 feet tall, exuding a lifelike presence and adorned in gold, ivory, and precious gems. Descriptions depict a luxurious statue reflecting light to create an ethereal and imposing effect in the temple.
The Legacy and Fate of the Statue of Zeus at Olympia
After being moved to Constantinople in 395 AD, the fate of the statue of Zeus at Olympia remained mysterious. It was eventually destroyed, possibly in the 5th or 6th centuries AD due to natural disasters or other events. Despite its physical loss, the image of the statue continued to influence ancient coinage, Christian art, and possibly even modern statues like the Lincoln Memorial, showcasing its enduring impact on art and culture.
The Statue of Zeus at Olympia is not well remembered today. But in its time, it seared itself into the minds and memories of all who saw it. An enormous, glowering, formidable statue built into a temple of otherworldly, translucent light, it was as tall as a three-storey building. People said it crouched on its throne as if it was about to stand—and break through the roof of its temple.
Zeus’ skin glistened. Made of yards and yards of priceless hippopotamus ivory, it had to be oiled down each day so it wouldn’t crack in the heat. Yes, this was truly the sweatiest, oiliest, stickiest of all the wonders. And there’s more: curses. Lovers’ names engraved in secret places. So much daytime sex. So many naked, athletic men. THE OLYMPICS. Join us on a slightly unhinged deep dive into this truly unique wonder that once held the entire Hellenic imagination in its grip.
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