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Hoarding disorder can feel deeply isolating, and finding genuine connection isn’t always straightforward.

In this episode, I talk about building community - both through hoarding-specific peer groups, online spaces, as well as simply nurturing friendships outside the home.

I share practical ways to reconnect, set boundaries, and remind yourself that you deserve care and companionship, whatever your home looks like.

The Relationship Between Hoarding and Isolation
How hoarding and isolation often accompany each other
Feelings of shame and concern about being misunderstood
Secrecy around hoarding, even from friends
Impact of loneliness on motivation and self-worth
The fundamental human need for connection
Finding Community: Hoarding-Specific Support
Benefits of speaking with others who “get” hoarding
Relief and authenticity in hoarding-focused communities
Misunderstandings and stigma around hoarding in general society
Shared language and understanding in dedicated groups
Types of Hoarding Communities
Peer support groups (both for people who hoard and for their loved ones)
Differences between in-person and online groups
Dehoarding accountability Zoom groups run by the host
Therapy groups led by professionals
Online forums, social media groups, and subreddits
Choosing a Support Group and Overcoming Barriers
The process of finding the right group for your needs
Not all groups will fit; trial and error is normal
Common barriers: fear of judgment, privacy concerns, and feeling overwhelmed
Exploring online versus in-person options based on comfort and access
Managing triggers and emotional challenges when joining a group
Broadening Community Beyond Hoarding
Importance of connection outside of the hoarding context
How hoarding can lead to progressive social isolation
Ways to set boundaries while still building relationships
Alternative Sources of Community & Connection
Joining hobby or interest-based groups (gardening, book clubs, crafts, etc.)
Attending classes and workshops (in-person or online)
Volunteering for shared causes and the benefits it offers
Engaging in outdoor activity groups for physical and mental health
Involvement in faith communities (acknowledging varied experiences)
Nurturing and Rekindling Friendships
The value of maintaining and nurturing friendships
Strategies for reconnecting with old friends (acknowledging awkwardness)
Personal anecdotes demonstrating successful reconnection
Maintaining and Deepening Existing Friendships
Creative ways of keeping in touch (memes, postcards, regular outings)
Showing care and interest without inviting people into your home
Importance of honesty about personal limitations
Navigating difficult moments with friends through gentle outreach
Building New Friendships
The importance of patience and consistent small efforts
Transitioning from casual acquaintance to meaningful connection
Reciprocity and mutual engagement as key to growing relationships
Natural pace of friendship development
The Value of Self-Compassion
Being a good friend to yourself while seeking social connections
Avoiding self-blame and catastrophic thinking
Recognising your own worth despite challenges related to hoarding
Taking Small Steps Toward Connection
Encouragement to take actionable, manageable steps to build community
Celebrating small efforts toward greater connection
Realistic expectations about gradual progress
Suggestions for relevant previous podcast episodes on loneliness, accountability, and community

Links

Podcast ep 200: Things I wish I’d known: a letter to Episode One Me
Podcast ep 130: Loneliness and hoarding with Vassia Sarantopoulou: build human connections and combat hoarding-related shame
Podcast ep 138: The Accountability Effect: Accountability, encouragement and mutual support when tackling hoarding and dehoarding
Come to a Dehoarding Accountability Zoom session: Accountability Booking Form
Website: Overcome Compulsive Hoarding
Become a Dehoarding Darling
Submit a topic for the podcast to cover
Questions to ask when dehoarding: https://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/podquestions
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